When the bell rang for recess, I stood up and turned to Erica.

-Shall we go?- I invited her.

There was no need to say where. We always met at the same spot under the trees, at the side of the courtyard. She stood up and followed me. We took a few steps towards the door, during which I looked around. It didn't take me long to find the gang, who were talking to Raquel.

-Guys, come with us- I called out to them.

The four of them looked at me smiling, but their smiles were wiped off their faces as they turned their attention to Erica. I knew immediately, their perspective of her had changed. They stood there so long without saying anything that we had to stop to wait for them.

-Hey, no, I'm busy with something- said Galica as she looked down at the ground.

Pekos scratched his head.

-I... I have to go and talk to a teacher. Don't wait for me.

Troveto took his cap and squeezed it in his hands.

-I have to copy the history homework, dude.

All three looked nervous. It was obvious that they simply didn't want to spend time with Erica.

-About the native empire? I'll lend it to you- she offered -it was super easy.

-No! No, thanks- Troveto hastened to respond -Rodri has already offered it to me, I just have to copy it, but thanks anyway.

-Alright.

I looked at Erica. She didn't seem to have any idea what was going on. I felt a bit sorry for her, but she had better believe it was all a coincidence.

-Well, it's just us then- I commented in a joking tone- Don't hold me responsible for what happens next.

The three of them looked at me, I don't know if they were worried for me or frightened for themselves. Erica laughed.

-What are you saying? Stop being so annoying!

The others laughed too, but not really. With Erica we went to the trees, more out of habit than desire. The truth is that I was nervous too, I didn't know how to behave in front of her. If anything I said annoyed her more than I should, it might be the last thing I would ever say.

We sat down and leaned against the logs. The day was cold, but the sky was clear. We had an excellent view of the courtyard, where our classmates were playing against the IV B class. I tried to think of a routine topic to talk about, nothing serious, something light to pass the time. But nothing came to mind. I didn't used to be like that, I swear, I could usually converse very easily with someone, especially with a girl.

I tried to concentrate. What do you use for conversation? The answer came to mind quickly: questions. You ask people things about themselves to get them to talk. After all, everyone likes to talk about themselves. Asking questions is a great way to start a conversation.

I looked at Erica. Several questions immediately came to my mind: How did your wound heal? How could you kill Solis? Do you plan to kill more people at school?

I couldn't ask her anything like that, obviously, but nothing else came to mind. I was caught up in my nerves.

-Do you think they will trust me again?- she asked.

I stood at attention for a moment. Then I realized that she had actually spoken.

-Hmm?

Erica looked at me.

-Do you think the guys will trust me again?

It took me several seconds to process her question. After I had done so, I realized that it didn't match what I had seen in class. Erica was no fool; she had realized, as I had, that the others were afraid of her. I had underestimated her.

Then she smiled.

-Are you afraid to be with me, too?- she asked.

I felt like my soul was falling to the ground.

-No, no, not at all- I hastened to reply, terrified.

She looked down, notably sad.

-I will never understand normal people. They see a dead man and lose their composure. Now everyone thinks I'm a monster or something.

She picked up a stone and raised it as if to throw it, but stopped before doing so and decided to put it down.

-I won't hurt anyone. I'm always careful around other people, especially you. I would like you to know that.

-Hey, its fine- was all I managed to say.

-I am careful not to hit others- she explained -you know, because if I pull one arm out really hard and there happens to be someone behind me, I could accidentally kill them.

I looked at my feet. I hadn't thought about the fact that Erica could also kill by accident, but it made sense. She'd already ripped a girl's leg off without meaning to. She could do the same to a head. My stomach shrinked.

-Yes, I'm afraid of you- I admitted- you have no reason to kill me, but knowing that you can do it whenever you want, it terrifies me... I'm sorry.

-It's okay. I'm scared of dying, too, sometimes- she revealed.

-What? You?- I pleaded, dismayed.

She wrinkled her eyebrows, but smiled at the same time. It was an expression of trust that relieved me, an expression you make to a friend, someone to whom you mean no harm.

-Of course! Two days ago that bitch shot me.

Her way of referring to Solis was a little shocking.

-You can't talk about Solis like that!- I exclaimed.

-Suck my cunt! I apologized and that bitch shot me! She could have blown my head off!

I tried to argue with her, but her argument was more convincing than I expected. It was true, after all: Erica was a victim in the matter. Realizing that what she was saying was valid, a smile forced its way onto my cheeks.

-So you were afraid?- I wanted to confirm.

-I thought I was going to die!- she revealed- or that one of you was going to die. She was crazy!

I could only nod at the memory of Solis' anger in her final moments.

-Wait a minute! So you killed her because you wanted to protect us?- I ventured.

-No, I was mostly afraid for myself- she admitted- but after I killed her, I felt good about the fact that she couldn't hurt you or anyone else.

I nodded and recalled the moment when Erica punched her and Solis flew through the air until she was embedded in a wall. I also remembered when she killed the group of criminals.

-How many people have you killed, Erica?- I asked in a whisper.

-Hmm?

I looked at her, puzzled. For a moment I thought that question had been too much, that she hated me, that hopefully she would give me a few seconds to stand up and run away. But those were just my thoughts, Erica wasn't upset.

-It's hard to know, I don't count the people I kill- she admitted- Besides, I hardly ever stay to confirm that the people I hit die, I just hit them and they stop bothering me. So I couldn't tell you.

I nodded. That made a lot of sense.

-I'm sorry, I was asking because you seem used to it- I explained.

-Oh, yes. I am.

I sighed. I was sure that conversation was taboo on its own, but I also didn't feel like stopping talking to her because I didn't like what she was saying. I was curious, I guess.

-And when was your first time? If you don't mind me asking.

She grimaced and dismissed it with a wave of her hand.

-No, not at all. My first time was... - she tried to remember, but it took her several seconds - once... yes, I think my dad told me once.

-How? Were you asleep? Did you kill someone while sleepwalking?

-No, no. My dad told me that I strangled a kindergarten teacher when I was two years old.

I turned pale. I immediately thought of a two year old baby, strangling a poor woman trying to shake her off.

-Oh...-I didn't want to say more so as not to make her angry.

-Yes, a shame, uh?

Her comment relieved me to some degree.

-A shame?

-Well, she didn't do anything wrong, just her job. It was my dad's negligence, but still.

I kept thinking.

-So you didn't like killing that lady- I asked to confirm.

-What do I know? I was two years old! But no, it was wrong if that's what you're asking.

I was speechless for a moment. Solis had shot her, the criminals had tried to hurt us, but the kindergarten teacher had probably done nothing wrong, and Erica regretted it.

-So... you don't kill just anyone?- I asked, relieved.

-No, of course not. Do I look that wild to you?

I sighed. My friend was not a murderous beast.

-No, it's just... no, nothing, it doesn't matter.

-Did you want to confirm that I wasn't going to kill you? I'm not.

-No, I just wanted to...- I had to gather my thoughts- I'm glad to know that you have a sense of justice. You discriminate. That's more encouraging than "a murderer".

I noticed that the latter had sounded more like a condemnation than a jokey nickname, as I had felt it in my head. I turned to her nervously. Erica had an arched eyebrow, but nothing more.

-I'm sorry- I muttered.

-Don't worry, I am a murderer- she confirmed- of course I have a sense of justice, we all do, don't we?

-I guess you're right. So who...?

-People who hurt me, or people who hurt my friends- she answered before I could finish- not that I have many, but still. I don't like people talking bad about my dad either, but that's no reason to kill them. Who else? - she tilted her head to either side, thoughtfully - more than killing, it's a matter of hitting back. An eye for an eye. You attack me, I attack you. You try to stab me, I stab you first. You shoot me, that's attempted murder, I kill you.

-Just like Solis- I thought.

I remembered the first days of school, when Erica didn't want anyone to know about her strength. Now I understood her; everyone was too afraid of her to get close. It was lonely and sad. I wondered how long it would take for them to trust her again.

-It makes sense- I said at last.

---------------------------------------------------------

During those days I didn't know what to think of Erica. I had been replaying the events in my head, reliving all the times we had shared with each other, when we had been close, when she had been annoyed with me. Erica was not an easy girl to piss off, but I realized that, every time I had scolded her or insisted on something, I had come closer to having my skull smashed in.

That's why, seeing her appear in the room as if nothing had happened, paralyzed me with fear. All of us, I think. Ocko was the only one who tried to speak to her naturally, and yet he seemed nervous too.

During the first break they went to talk. I think Ocko wanted to make sure that Erica hadn't changed, that she was still his friend. I knew she hadn't turned into a monster or a children's movie villain or anything like that. Erica was still Erica, the same as always, we just didn't know before how dangerous she could be. That's why I didn't know if I wanted to hang out with her anymore. I felt guilty for being so nervous around her, but I felt worse knowing that she could kill me at any moment.

After the first break I started to calm down, to think about other things, to talk to other people. Erica didn't behave any differently, I thought that the Solis incident was in the past, that we would never have to worry about anything like that again.

The bell rang for the second break. I went to the hallway to buy a juice box. I went back to the living room and on the way I watched the boys playing football.

-Why do they have to do that between classes? They'll all end up sweaty- I said to myself.

-Hello- I heard from the side.

I turned around, puzzled. Beside me stood Erica, smiling. I froze at that moment, not knowing what to do. I stared at her dumbfounded for longer than I would like to admit.

-Can you help me with the homework the biology teacher left? There's a part I didn't understand- she asked me, as if it were any other day.

-Eh... uh... I... -I stammered- uh...

I looked in all directions, nervous. Before I knew it, I had taken a step back.

-I have to... I have to go to the bathroom- I excused myself.

Erica put a hand to her head.

-That's fine. I'll get it with someone else.

Stunned, I turned around and left. I was breathing heavily, my heart pounding. I couldn't believe I had refused to spend time with Erica. I couldn't believe I had been paralyzed with fear. But it had happened. Erica was dangerous, too dangerous, no matter how friendly her intentions.

I walked away in quick strides until I turned a corner and pressed myself against the wall, praying to all the saints that she wouldn't head in the same direction. Erica scared me, the girl I had liked so much until a few days ago, now she scared me. I didn't even know what to think of her anymore.

-Maybe I should stay away for a while- I said to myself.

I calmed down. I let the break and the day go by. After classes were over, we each went home.

It was in my bed, trying to sleep, when I realized that, by distancing myself from Erica, I was going to severely limit the number of friends I hung out with. More specifically by 50 percent. Pekos, Troveto and Galica weren't bad people, but I didn't feel I could call them my friends, we just followed Ocko.

I sighed. I hadn't realized until that moment when I was distancing myself from a friend, how much it meant to have such a trusting relationship with another person. I had so many things to tell her, so many things to do, so many laughs, so many good times. But that was before the fear.

Besides my family, Ocko was perhaps the most important person to me. At least I could still depend on his friendship.