This needs to be said.

Ladies. Gentleman. Non binaries.

If ya'll have ever been hurt or had your hearts broken by someone PLEASE do not rush into jumping into another relationship especially when you haven't fully moved on from the previous relationship.

Try to think of it as house. The house is messy. You need to clean it. You need to put it in order. You need to throw some stuff out because ain't no body wants to get into a messy house. That's the same thing with feelings. It will take time but that's the whole point. Giving yourself time.

Not only are letting that person into your life, that person is going to have to be put up and get caught up in your entangled problems and your mess and NO ONE wants that just as no one doesn't want to be in a messy house with clothes and shit everywhere.

What many people don't understand is that moving on means ACCEPTING the past. If you haven't fully accepted it then you haven't moved on completely.

And please bare in mind that these people are not your crutch, therapist and rehabilitation centre. You can't expect them to fix you. They don't have that right or authority to do. They have their own shit to deal with. Even if they want to help fix you, they won't really know how. Which is why YOU should give yourself time to heal, accept and move on because it's YOUR journey and yours alone. These are YOUR emotions and YOUR problems and it's UP TO YOU to find solutions because the only person who knows you better than anyone else is YOU.

So take your time to heal, process and accept the past. Because if you just jump into another relationship with out healing and expect to heal from that relationship I will tell you, if you thought the previous relationship you were in didn't hurt you enough I PROMISE YOU the next one will destroy you in many ways you might not even know is possible. Not only will you be hurt but the person involved with be affected MORE than you.

I learned this the hard way. Though the person I was involved with wasn't hurt nor did he have any hard feelings towards me it still doesn't change the fact that I used him as a rehab and a rebound just to move on from my previous relationship which was toxic and it took me up until I got into my 20s (two years after I broke up with him) to accept and acknowledge the fact that I used him and that I still had feelings for mh my ex. I wished I could have used those five years to heal and move on from all that instead of jumping into another relationship the following year after the break up.

So before you think about getting into another relationship after the previous one. Please give yourself time to get your house and feelings in order so you can welcome and accommodate the next person.