So...

I was looking through books,

and I come upon something with a slightly terrifying blurb.

It said this: (obviously, it's not what it actually said, but it's close to what the blurb was)

HELLO! MY NAME IS ANNA-STACEY MARIE JULIETTE THE THIRD AND I LOVE HAWT BAD BOYS!

*sinks into chair*

And because I'm like Curious George,

No- I swear I'm not a monkey! I'm just really curious,

I decided to check it out.

AND DO NOT LISTEN TO WHATEVER I SAID BEFORE- THIS WAS DEFINITELY THE WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE.

Chapter 1:

"HI MY NAME IS ANNA-STACEY MARIE AND I HAVE BEAUTIFUL SAPPHIRE LAKES ON MY FACE AND FLOWING BLONDE CURLS THAT RUN DOWN MY BACK LIKE A WATERFALL IM SUPER SKINNY AND HAVE CURVES BUT I THINK IM SUPER UGLY AND IM REALLY DEPRESSED LIKE I WANNA KILL MYSELF BUT THEN I HAVE THIS AMAZING BOYFRIEND I SMACKED INTO A BRICK WALL BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY HIS CHEST AND WE KISSED AND THEN I BECAME HIS GIRLFRIEND. BUT SOMETIMES HE MAKES ME CRY BECAUSE HE LIKES BDSM"

Mhm yes, lovely. Just lovely.

Exactly where are the punctuation marks? 

If you'd like to know:

SENTENCE ENDINGS:

Three of the fourteen punctuation marks used frequently in the English language are appropriate to use as sentence endings, they are as follows:

The Period "." is placed at the end of declarative sentences, completed statements and thoughts, and after certain abbreviations. 

For example:

- At the end of a sentence: Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of ice. 

- After abbreviations: Dr. Smith took a look at her patient. 

The Question Mark "?" is placed at the end of a sentence to indicate a question. 

For example:

*Did Jack and Jill climb up the hill?

The Exclamation Mark "!" is used to emphasize or label a sudden outcry. 

For example:

*Within dialogue: "AHHHH!" screamed Jack

*To emphasize a point: My sister Jill makes me furious! 

And... that's all I'm going to say at the moment. 

Chapter 2:

"SO ANYWAYS MY FRIEND AND ME WERE WALKING DOWN THE STREET AND WE SEES TIS RANDOM GUY NAMEDD SPINCER AND THEN MY FRIEND WENT AND SHE KISSED HIM BECAUSE HES HER SECRET BOYFRIEND BUT SHE NEVER TOLD ME AND NOW IM SAD BECAUSE KYLIE BRANDA MARIE ANN TARA FISHIE IS MY BEST FRIEND AND SHE NEVER TELLS ME ANYTHING ANYMORE BUT SHE SAYS ITS BECAUSE OF MY BAD BOY BOYFRIEND NAMED JACK CLEMENTINE MARCY SPEARS WHO WEARS LEATHER JACKETS AND BLACK ALL THE TIME AND HES SO EMO"

I decided to go on.

Chapter 3:

"THEN I STARTED CUTTING AND MY BOYFRIEND STARTED KISSING THEM AND THEYSTARTED HEALING REALLY QUICKLY.

*coughs*

You know cuts can't heal that quickly, right?

And a boyfriend isn't the answer to every kind of illness there is. 

AND THEN I STOPPED READING... 

goodbye.