Chapter 22
Notes:
Addtional Cast:
Nick Zano as Alex Summers
Jessica Parker Kennedy as Sam Harris
Sophie's POV
It's been an awful weekend for me. After the 'Jonessa' intervention, I made my decision, which is the following: I, Sophie Lillian Ford, will apologize to Robin (I will have to learn her last name at some point).Yes, that's the plan. Spot her at class, sit next to her, give her my signature smile and apologize. Solid plan, I know!
As I enter the classroom, I spot her immediately (blond hair and all...is it natural?) and tentatively approach the row she is sitting at. She is staring at the board, not bothering turning to face me, but I can tell she saw me because she looks rather stiff and on edge. I clear my throat to get her to look at me, and ask as sweetly as possible.
"Good morning... may I sit?" I wait for a few seconds, but no reply. Hmm... Well, I will sit down anyway. I make myself comfortable in my seat and take my notes out.... this is so awkward.... ok, one more try....
I pat her shoulder this time- she can't ignore that, can she? Right on cue, her head turns slowly, and I sigh relieved. Her blue eyes strike me first (I don't think I had noticed how blue they were before) but then also her clenched jaw.
"What?" She is angry. That, I can recognise.
"Listen, umm, I would like to apologize for what happened." I kinda mumble... "I was a jerk, and what I said was uncalled for." I play with my fingers, which means I am nervous.... "I am sorry, truly... and..... thank you for taking care of me... I.... I appreciate it." I lower my head, and wait for her reaction. She keeps looking at me for a while, but still nothing...
Damn girl use your mouth!
I speak more aggressively this time though. "Look, I know I was horrible, but I am apologizing here! I would like an answer you know!" ...ok Soph, don't lose it! "Can I at least buy you a coffee to get us even?" ...oohhh come on, stop being difficult!
"Is it gonna be poisoned?" She barks, narrowing her eyes.
Out of all the things she could have said, that's her answer?
"If you have an agenda to eliminate the gays, I would prefer to die as peaceful as possible, so poison would be nice." She says bitterly, mocking me in my face.
"Ha ha, no that's not my agenda, and can you keep your voice down? People are gonna think I am a KKK member! Which is not true, ok? I know I might have come off as not accepting or something, but I am not a racist or anything!" I try to explain myself since I know I gave the wrong idea.
"Then, what are you?" She asks, somehow interested in my answer. Her arms cross on her chest and her head tilts.
"I... I don't know to be honest.... I am just not familiar with the issue and I am just not comfortable with strangers." And I am being honest...
"Exactly, you don't know. But you decided to be offensive and bitchy anyway... look, the professor just got here... so can we end this? I don't know you, and you don't know me... let's call it quits, ok?" She turns her attention to the board again taking notes as the professor starts his lecture.
"What if I want to get to know you?" I am quick to reply.
Wow, what? I said that out loud?
"I mean, let me buy you a coffee, please, I really feel awful about how I reacted." Nice save Soph!
"Umm..... fine, if that makes you stop, then yes we can get coffee, I guess. Promise you won't be an asshole to me?" She asks seriously.
"I promise." I say and she smirks, before she turns her attention to the center of the class.
When the class ends, we both get up not exchanging that many words and I follow her around as she takes me to a coffee shop next to the University.
As I reach for the door of the cafe, her hand beats me to it, and she opens it for me, beckoning me to enter first..That's quite polite... no one has ever opened a door for me..
We move to the register and after we place our orders and get our coffees, we find a table to sit at the far end of the cafe. Once seated, we both look at each other... awkwardly, until Robin breaks the silence first.
"I guess we should start with introductions. I'm Robin Summers, almost 19, sociology major and film minor. I've lived here my whole life. My parents are dead, so I live with my uncle.".... I blink, not expecting all this info...what do you say to something like this?
"I am sorry."...shit not this! "I mean, I know I don't know you, but it is unfortunate, losing your parents...so..."
"It's ok, it happened when I was 2, so.... Anyway... what about you?" I sense she wants to change the subject and I do too.
"Well, Sophie Lillian Ford, almost 18. Pre-law and poli-sci." I state politely.
"That's it? I give my life portrait and all I get is a full name and age?" She laughs lightly and I can tell the angry vibes are now slightly gone.
"Well I don't know what else to say... like I said, I am not good with strangers." I say the ugly truth... I feel awkward, wanting to leave...but she speaks again and what she says surprises me.
"Do you wanna play 20 questions?" That's something I didn't expect, but it sounds good and I guess since we are here to talk, we should actually talk, so I nod my head... "I will ask first." she says.
Instead of 20 questions though, we had like 50, spending 2 hours talking about our lives, and surprisingly, I had fun. She is cool..and funny, and can hold a serious conversation. We learnt the basic stuff about each other, like favourite colour, favourite food, movie, world leader....
"Is it ok if I apologize again? Not just about the other night, but for the Monday disaster as well. I know I sounded like an opposer, I didn't mean that... the outcast thing...and then the perv thing...I am not a racist... I promise... just uneducated I suppose.." I say because I can tell she is worth it one more time.
"It's ok, you already did." She gives me a genuine smile that illuminates her face, but I still feel guilty. "You wanna know why it is ok?" After my nod, she continues.
"I think people that are against the Community in general, tend to be cruel because simply, they don't know them. They have no connection to them... they are strangers, they mean nothing, so they don't bother being sympathetic." She pauses for a while and then, "you want to see Joseph, your friends, and your little brother happy, right?" she asks and I nod. "Well, if one of them was different, would you still like that for them? If your brother fell in love with a boy that made him happy, would you not like that?" She asks carefully.
I take a few minutes to think about it... actually, I knew the answer the moment her question was asked.
"Of course I would be happy for him." And it's the truth.
"Well, see? You would be ok with it, because you know him and love him. You are not a racist. You just didn't sympathize with the cause, because you had no reason to... But that's the sad thing in this, too. Why can't people just support and understand each other without this connection? We are not different, you know. I want a person to make breakfast to and play videogames with, or go shopping, and have Netflix and chill days with... I want what all people want. Someone to love and love me back...and about the perv thing... well, you woke up to a stranger's room half naked, that doesn't excuse your behavior, but I am willing to forgive that. You apologized and I respect that." She gives me another lopsided smile.
After that, I honestly don't know what to say. I called this girl a perv, but she is willing to let it go, and she is now taking the time to get to know me.
"I have a suggestion, but I don't wanna make it seem like a brainwash or something. On Wednesdays, I often volunteer for the lgbt youth center. We have a lot of kids there, we have sessions and we help them and stuff. Would you like to join me? Maybe get familiar with the community now that we know you're not a racist and leaning towards support?" She says playfully but anxiously awaits my reaction. I give her a smile to reassure her, but unfortunately my reply is not so warm.
"Well it's a lot to take in, in just 3 hours, and I just got rid of the 'homophobe' label, so I guess I'm not at that point yet, I am afraid I will say something stupid and embarrass myself.. But maybe someday soon?" I ask shrugging.
I hope she is ok with that, I still need to process things and get a new perspective.. I mean, there are things to learn about it. I have to be informed, fully and thoroughly.
"Yeah, sorry, that was quick, I was just excited! Maybe another time, yeah... You know, if you have like questions, I can give you my number and you can ask!" She smiles again politely, so I take out my phone and hand it to her. Once she is done, I take it back and look at the contact: Νew Lez Friend.
"Really?" I ask her eye rolling. She smirks and winks.
"I find it fitting". Of course she does..
When I left the shop 15' later, I left with a foundation for a potential friendship and a change of hearts.
Later that day, I sat in my bed, thinking about what Robin said. The things she said about knowing the other and wanting them to be happy... I never thought of that, that way. I guess that's because I didn't know any gay people growing up, and homosexuality is something that I never discussed with my parents, so there was no way for me to be supportive of something I didn't fully know about.. God, I lived in such a tiny bubble, didn't I? Out of mind, out sight, isn't that what they say?
The more I think about it, the more I find myself ok with the idea. They are people who love each other. They do not harm the society in any way. They pay their taxes, go to church, they can get married and have kids... yeah that's what all people do. They are no different. I wonder if I would be more open to it if my parents and I had the conversation when I was younger, but like I said, we never talked about things like that. Things like war and third world countries, because both my parents have different ideas and it was confusing. They thought it best to let me form my opinion on stuff, but I never did research on LGBT. Damn, I have so many questions, and when I question something, Google is my savior!
Search after search though, I feel more confused than ever so, I look at my watch and without hesitation I text Robin : I googled things but they got me confused! Something about a scale? Kinsley scale?. And I got a lot of Lady Gaga stuff and Ellen..! Do you listen to Lady Gaga??
I press send.. but I kinda regret it immediately... oh boy.. but, as I panic, thinking she's gonna think I am an idiot, a get a replay: a)do not trust google b) its Kinsey and it is supposed to be a test that can determine your sexuality c) lady G and Ellen are legends to the community d)no, I don't listen to lady gaga, but I have been to her concert, so I don't hate her either :-p and e) this is Sophie, right? Cause I don't know anyone else that would ask me those questions at 21:37.
I text again, face palming: yeah it's Sophie, sorry I should have said that first. My phone vibrates again: can I make a suggestion?
Yes sure. I type back quickly. A minute later she answers back: instead of Google you should watch movies or documentaries. Books and search engines are too impersonal. If you want to know, then that's the way I suggest you do it.
I think about for a sec... I don't know any movie with that concept.. So I text the obvious: any movie suggestions??
The next message I get is a list of movies I haven't heard of... I think....wait, Brokeback mountain sounds familiar!
And then her suggestion: if you want serious then watch Milk. For light stuff watch Pride. For romance watch Carol and for drama Brokeback mountain. Let me know ;)
I type a thank you to her and say good night ending our conversation, making the decision to watch the serious stuff first, so I go to the kitchen to make popcorn, which Joss totally exploited when I left the room for a while, and once ready and tucked in, I put Milk on...
2 hours and a bowl of popcorn later, I am broken.
To Νew Lez Friend: I just saw Milk! What in the world? he didn't have to die like that! It was heartbreaking.
From New Lez Friend: sorry, I warned you!
To New Lez Friend: you should be! Also, I am changing your name on my phone to Robin.
From Robin: well drama aside, did it bother you? Watching 2 men together?
To Robin: it was weird mostly, but I didn't hate it. It was different from what I know, that's all.
From Robin: that's a great! Well, I really need to sleep though...
To Robin: yeah yeah sorry, it's late! Goodnight again!
From Robin: it's OK, have a nice night :)
Robin's Pov
I stare at my phone contemplating whether to send a message or not. I don't want to seem too pushy or overwhelm her, so I don't know how to approach her without crossing her boundaries. Our talk in the coffee shop was interesting and I quite enjoyed it, and our last texts....I didn't think she would be so eager to learn things about my community... it was thoughtful I think...... how can I approach the subject again?......... Oh, the heck with it, imma do it!
To Sophie: Goodmorning!
I mean, it's almost 13:00, but it still counts as morning right? I get up and head to the kitchen to grab a bite and then get ready for my 15:00 class, holding my phone tightly waiting for a reply. I am in the middle of devouring my sandwich when the phone dings signaling a text, so I quickly open the app with a smile.
From Sophie: It's after 1, so I don't think it counts as morning. Hello Robin.
Of course she would scold me. This girl is impossible!
To Sophie: Hello :) I was wondering if you would watch a movie tonight from the ones I told you about....to get familiar with the issues?
Lamest text ever..... Ro, I am disappointed in you. All this texting with the other girls and you send that? Awesome!
From Sophie: Um I don't know, I am still heartbroken by Milk last night...and I have to study for my law class so I don't think so, not tonight.
Why am I surprised? She is not a slacker like you Ro.
To Sophie: Yeah yeah no biggie...um maybe we could watch one together, in case you have questions?? Texting is kinda slow...
Wtf? I hit send, didn't I ? she is gonna think I am hitting on her! Oh God, rescue me!
With trembling hands, I wait for her reply, seriously sweating. When it vibrates again, I swallow hard taking a deep breath, preparing myself for all scenarios. I didn't notice till later that she took about 5 minutes to answer my text...wait, I had be hyperventilating for 5 minutes?
From Sophie: I'm not comfortable with that yet, like I said I am a bit slow with people I don't know very well :( sorry..maybe next week?
I feel a clench in my stomach, and all of the sudden, all I want is to go back to bed and close my eyes. I made her feel uncomfortable and it bugged me for some reason. I don't like putting people in a weird position,and since we just started being friends, the guilt I feel is ten times worse, plus, I pushed her about the youth center yesterday! Oh God, I probably scared her away with my effort to make her a supporter!
"What's with the long face?" My thoughts are interrupted by my uncle who had just come downstairs in his uniform.
"Nothing." I murmur and he laughs. Not in the mood for teasing, old man!!
"Then, why are you pouting like a 6 year old? Actually, the pouting six-year-old you was way cuter than you right now". His arms are crossed and he has that annoying smirk on his face. He walks towards the kitchen table and sits down, pointing at the seat next to him. It doesn't take long for me to sit down and spill everything to him.
"So, let's recap. She was kinda offensive at first and pissed you off, then, she got drunk at a party and you brought her here, and then she got offensive again because she freaked out, and then she apologized, and now, you guys are kinda friends?" he looks amused. "And now you are pouting, feeling bad you asked her out on a movie night date."
"Wait, no, no, not a date -date! Like friends..but you just confirmed my worries. She probably thinks it's a date and politely freaked out." I say banging my head on the table groaning.
"Answer me a question, will ya?" My uncle asks and I nod, face still on the table surface.
"Why do you want to be friends with her? If it was another person doing all these things to you, which I don't approve of, by the way, you would have given them hell. So....why isn't that the case?"
"Because like I said, she is not a bad person.. I mean, yes, she was awful, but she apologized and I appreciate that, she realized she made a mistake and the moment we started talking, I could tell that her ignorance wasn't due to homophobia or anything, she just grew up in an indifferent environment. It wasn't her fault. She seemed eager to get familiar with the subject so....... she is so socially awkward, like you have no idea!....... She is an intriguing person. There's something about her." I reply honestly, whispering the last part.
"You are too good for your own sake, kid." He pats my shoulder and gets up heading to the door. "Dont fret. I don't think she got offended or thought it was a date, but like I always say, communication is the key, so text her to tell her what bothers you. Most likely it's only in your head. Bye kiddo, see ya tomorrow!"
And with a last wave of his hand, he gets out, leaving me in the kitchen sulking over my breakfast and my phone. Maybe I should listen to him and text her to explain my intention.... Uggghhh I hate this, and this sandwich is gross, what's in it? I throw it away and get to my bedroom huffing and puffing, really hating the guilty feeling in my chest. Once laid in my bed, with a spark of courage I text her.
To Sophie: I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable....it wasn't a date suggestion, I only meant as friends, but I understand and respect your boundaries :)
I hope this text settles things...I don't get a reply right away which makes me sulk even more, so I turn on my pc to my Spotify account to the Glass Animals discography and start getting ready, trying to forget about it.
At class, I mind my own business, taking notes, when my phone vibrates next to my notebook. I stop mid sentence and open the text that, as the name indicates, is from Sophie.
From Sophie: It's ok it didn't make me uncomfortable.
Ok, the text leaves me no way to carry on with the conversation so I think I should end it?
I text: Thank god! I don't wanna bother you, so have a good day:)
The text I got was unexpected: you don't bother me! I am grocery shopping so no worries, the line is big enough so I have time.. unless I am bothering you? I probably am.. I can let you go back to your business.
To Sophie: No no I am at class but it's ok! I can keep you virtual company for a while ;)
What the fuck. Virtual company? I hope she got my sense of humor. Sam and the others get it.. but then again, Sophie is not like the others and she doesn't know me well.
From Sophie: I thank you for the virtual company, tell me about your class.
I spent 15, fast passing minutes, telling her about my classes, commenting on the professors that I have and the level of boredom of each class. She, on the other hand, wasn't complaining as a freshman would do and I notice that she doesn't swear, unlike me.. I counted 5 fucks, 1 asshole and 2 bitches. Very classy of me... it could have been worse though...
She doesn't reply at some point so, guessing she must be paying for her grocery, I return to my class, paying attention to the remaining lecture, feeling somehow better about this day already.
She does answer back though, 2 hours later, as I am listening to music, and somehow the texting doesn't stop 'till 9 p.m. when we end our texting with goodnights and a "ttyl" along with 2 smiley emojis on the text and an actual smile on my face.
I am very pleased with this progress... I think Sophie is a very interesting girl... different.
I think I should inform Sam for this.
To Sam: sooo, guess who apologized? We decided to start over.
From Sam: What? Are you joking? Do not joke like that!
To Sam: No I am not joking ok? Relax I know what I am doing, ok? She seemed sorry. You know I am not a hateful person for long periods.
From Sam: This is a certain disaster but whatever. I am on a late date and you are kinda ruining it. I will slap you tmrw.
To Sam : OMG!!!! Get out of here! You, on a date? Wow!
From Sam : Shut the fuck up. I don't want her to think i am ignoring her. Goodnight- do not message me g'night back!
I look at her message and giggle. Sam, on a date, after one day of knowing the girl? She really is smitten as fuck.. ohh, I am going to troll her for this!
Next day, of course Sam would be knocking on my door first thing in the morning..10:00 to be exact, because, as she said, she had to come and slap me in person. She sits on my bed, while I get ready for my one o'clock class.
"Sooooo...you guys are friends now? With her?" She says, disapproval evident in her voice.
"Yes... we talked and she apologized... and I got to know her and she is not awful." I explain, but her attitude is still negative.
"You do remember I had to come here and calm you down, right? You called me freaked out, crying and now you made peace with her? I am sorry but no... I don't support this. This is a huge mistake and a disaster in the making." She says and I eyeroll.
"Sam, come on! She is not awful! She is-" but she interrupts me... as usual.
"I am sorry but she made my best friend hurt, therefore I don't trust her, but if you want to have a friendship, as you call it, with her, fine....I warned you.... oh and fyi, do not hope I will be hanging out with her soon... I don't like her. Period." She says, arms crossed, still pissed.... I know she is protective, but I know she is wrong about Sophie... so, in order to change the subject, I turn the conversation to her.
"Sooooooo.... You got a date?? How was that?" I say smiling, hoping her mood will change... and it does, thank Zeus! Slowly, a smile appears, and her cheeks turn red..oh, she is screwed!
"It... was.... amazeballs... Ro, she was so sweet! She is so kind, and so so talkative! We talked about our pasts and about our lives, FYI, I mentioned you to her, and the thing we had and she was cool, so, now I kinda want you to meet her soon, because I really like her, Ro! I am so excited!" She says in one breath, and my heart swells from joy.. my happy Sam is here.. It's been awhile.. God, I hope this works..
"Sure, I have to meet my best friend's girlfriend! I am the maid of honor after all... so, when's the wedding?" I say smirking and she throws a pillow at me.
"Shut up bitch, she isn't my girlfriend..yet.... But if the second date goes perfectly well, I will definitely ask her.. Ro, she is amazing... I think this will work." She lowers her head and I come near her, putting my hand on her shoulder.
"I know it will, you deserve it Sam." I say and kiss her cheek. She smiles at the affectionate gesture and I do too, feeling happy for her happiness. We talk and goof together for another half hour, till she goes back home and I get into my car and drive to college for yet another class.
It's 11:40 and I'm walking with my friend John to the coffee house, where I see a familiar wild mane.
Sophie's POV.
I am sitting on a table all by myself at the coffee shop Robin took me to, reading my book till my 12:00 class. It's been a good week so far and a few things have changed for me already since the beginning of the school year. For example now Robin and I talk. We texted each other and it didn't feel awful at all. She is rather funny, so there is not much awkwardness there. Another thing that changed is my status with Vanessa. I never thought I would say this, but Vanessa is a very caring and compassionate person and cool to have around. She texted me on Monday to ask me how it went with Robin and was genuinely happy that Robin decided to give me another chance. I also texted her yesterday to arrange a study session at the library because she is a very respective person and doesn't talk during studying, so she makes a good company. This time I will bring muffins and hopefully she will like them.
Page after page the book gets fascinating and I thank god this book is not a waste of time, cause this would be a real bummer, since time is money and I hate wasting it.
I stop reading though, when a hand lands on my shoulder and startled, I turn my head, only to see a smiling Robin with her brown leather postman bag and a cup of coffee in hand, next to an also smiling guy, sit on my table.
"Hey Sophie what's up? This is my friend John." She introduces the smiling guy.
"Hello Robin, hi John. How are you guys?" I ask nervously looking at the guy. John greets me first and asks me a few basic things about myself, while Robin takes the book I was reading, to take a look at it. The guy leaves us 10 minutes later, winking at me and blowing a kiss at Robin which she returns, and I am kinda confused here..she seems to notice though, thanks to my facial expression, I guess.
"I am not attracted to him. I am 100% gay, we are just being stupid, you should see us playing PS, that's always fun." She answers grinning and I nod.
"That's called Bi, right? Liking both sexes? I read about it." I ask her and she agrees.
"It is a sensitive issue to the community, because the straights don't find them straight enough and the gays, gay enough, so yeah they are in between. Some people tend to erase bisexuality claiming that you can't like both.... We still have miles to go.." She sounds disappointed at that.
"I hope that changes." I say hoping this is the right answer. I, myself didn't get it at first when I read about it, but I don't want to tell her that. We've had enough misunderstandings already.
She seems to like the answer so I give points to myself for doing a good job. She is silent for a while and I can't find anything serious to say, so I mention the movie list she gave me. I told her I would have time to watch one tonight but I didn't want something heartbreaking so she suggested Carol, and since I appreciate Cate Blanchett, Carol it is, and she also asked for my comment on the movie once over and I promise her I will. She gets up putting her bag on her shoulder, and since this is the first time we hang out since our newfound friendship, I don't know how to say goodbye..should we hug? Shake hands?
I get up as well, as awkwardly as ever but she speaks tentatively.
"Normally I hug people, but a handshake seems more appropriate so.." She extends her hand and I stare at her dumbfounded. Does she have superpowers?
"I have read many body language guides. I find human behaviorism very interesting, and you have obvious tell signs. Sorry if that freaked you out." Her hand is still extended so I reach for it and shake it. She smiles brightly and leaves me seconds later, wondering what my tell signs are and where I could find books about it.
A/N:Thanks for reading. Don't forget to comment! ;)
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