(I decided to not let Ellie be happy so I rewrote this)

t/w child sexual abuse, domestic violence, miscarriage, child murder, suicide, murder-suicide

not proofread, I don't have a will to live

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Elizabeth Mary Maxwell was a nine year old girl kidnapped from her home by HYDRA in 1949, kept nine years old for sixty-five years and used as the Winter Soldier's glorified assistant, under the name Hush. She endured a life filled with abuse, after escaping HYDRA she would never be quite sane again, having no feelings about violence, having no feelings about murder, except that it felt good. Well, that's how it played out in your world.

In this world, Ellie's life went rather differently.

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1949

She was deaf now. Ellie was no longer of use to HYDRA. As such, they left her alone. The Winter Soldier could manage just fine.

On March 10th, Ellie was allowed to run around in the woods with her sister, running around and laughing.

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1951

During church one day, Arthur gently took Ellie's arm. He asked Agnes and Winston if he could steal her away for a moment. The parents agreed. Susie glanced at the two nervously, before looking away from her little sister.

Arthur slowly led Ellie into his office. He placed her on his couch. "Just relax," He signed, slowly. Ellie nodded, complying as he took her clothes off. She didn't understand why exactly. She didn't understand what he was doing, she just knew it hurt a lot.

She just knew he kept doing it sometimes when she came.

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1955

Ellie didn't understand it necessarily as to why Dolley was missing. Something, something, 'definitely suicide'. She didn't like thinking about it, so she didn't think about it. Susie comforted her sister one night, gently rubbing her arm.

Susie eventually stood. "They'll find her," She signed, before leaving.

Ellie barely even remembered what they'd been talking about.

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1958

Two days after Ellie's eighteenth birthday, she was married to George Hammond. He was another man at the church, twenty years her senior, and in recent months had expressed a desire for Ellie. One month before she turned eighteen, they were engaged.

Ellie just knows that her parents were telling her one day that she was marrying George. Now she was dancing with him and kissing him. She was smiling. She was supposed to be happy, wasn't she? Why didn't she feel happy? She wanted to be happy, but she just wasn't.

When her took her home and led her to their shared bedroom, she felt no pleasure. She just felt a sense of dread.

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Christmas Eve, 1958, Ellie gave birth to her daughter, Marie Dolley Hammond. She remembers the way George kissed her forehead, as if he hadn't hit her multiple times that day and more times than she could count in the months since they got married.

"She's beautiful," George signed. "Just like you, Ellie." He kissed her forehead again.

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Over the course of ten years, the couple would have five children. Marie, Winston, George Jr, Noah, and Audrey.

It was supposed to be six. It was supposed to be six.

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1968

Ellie placed a hand against her belly. In a few months, she was going to be a mother to six children. She wondered if this one would be a boy or a girl. If it was a boy, she'd name him after Bucky and if it was a girl, she'd name her after Susie.

She then felt her husband stomping through the house. Bad day at work, it happened, and he'd inevitably take it out on either her or one of her children. She stood up, went downstairs and was immediately hit by George. He pushed her onto the floor as Ellie gestured for her children to leave the room, which they did, Marie gathering her younger siblings away from the violence.

He then started kicking her in the stomach. And then he stopped and he left the room.

Ellie's baby boy or baby girl was gone. She knew that when she started bleeding.

Ellie decided she couldn't live like this anymore. She just couldn't.

Laying in bed next to George that night, she thought about what she wanted to do about this.

Should she kill George? Well, then she'd have to go on the run with her children, as they'd surely suspect her, and she didn't want them to live a life on the run.

Kill herself? Ellie couldn't bear the thought of leaving her children alone with this monster.

That night, Ellie had her plan.

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Once George left for work in the morning, Ellie led all her children into her and George's shared bedroom. The redhead then made her way downstairs, outside and into the shed, where George kept his shotgun. She pulled it out, loaded it, and then back into her room where her children were.

Ellie cocked the shotgun and shot her children one by one. She made sure they were dead before turning the gun on herself.