Draco knew the potion wasn't healthy, but it was better than facing his overwhelming emotions. It seemed that right after he discovered his...leanings - that was all he could think about. Men. One time he had a dream that he was surrounded by them, some masculine, some feminine; some completely naked, others wearing lacy lingerie; but all were men. He'd woken up with a massive boner, sweaty and already seconds from coming. 

That's when he decided to make a change. If his feelings wouldn't go away on their own, he'd make them go away. 

The potion that he used was a diluted Amortentia mixed with watered-down Draught of Living Death, making a potion that "kills love", so to speak. 

It got rid of his emotions, both sexual fantasy and everyday disturbances. But, though diluted, the Draught of Living Death would slowly weaken him, just as the Amorentia would slowly heighten any feelings he harbored for someone. Should he stop taking the mixture, those feelings would emerge again. 

He couldn't let that happen, so he kept taking it, feeling worse and worse every time the concoction wore off, so he'd take more. 

Thus this endless cycle began. 

    He sat in Runes, next to Harry who wasn't paying any attention to the professor, focused on some musty book that he probably got from the Restricted Section. Normally, Draco would look over his shoulder to see what it was about, but all his curiosity had drained out of him. He stared straight ahead, lost in dull thoughts. 

That's when he realized that his heart was pounding in his chest; color returning to his cheeks. "No," he mumbled.

Worry that should've been eradicated form his potion began stirring inside him. He suddenly realized that Harry's and his shoulders were touching. He reached down to his bag, searching for a fresh bottle. Heart beating so loud, he knew Harry could hear it, Draco desperately stiffed through his bag, saliva evaporating from his mouth, leaving his tongue feeling heavy and dry. 

Harry looked at him, and all Draco could think about was how pretty he looked. "Stop," he wheezed.

"Stop what?" Harry asked, furrowing his brows.

"Looking at me." Draco felt as if he were going to fall off his chair. 

Harry laughed at his expression, shrugging and focusing on his book, a book on dragons. Draco gasped as the potion left his system. He was out of potion, the rest of his supply currently hiding under his bed, back in the Slytherin dorms. 

His hand involuntarily reached out to touch Harry's messy black hair, but he resisted the urge. His heart tried to escape from his chest, pounding and pounding at a thousand beats per second. Harry glanced at him, "Sure you're alright, mate?"

Draco squeaked, Harry's green eyes pierced through his very soul. He wanted to look at them all day. Draco shook his head, pulling at his hair furiously focusing straight ahead. Every emotion inside of him rushed to be expressed, seeming to whisper Tell him. Touch him. Kiss him. Claim him. 

Harry was definitely concerned now. "Dray, are you sure you're alright?"

"Don't call me that." He really wanted Harry to call him that.

"Okay, okay. What's wrong?"

Draco stood up, not in control of his own body. Volition stolen from him, he grabbed Harry's hand and rushed out of the room despite the professor's protests. "What are you doing?" Harry asked.

Draco let go of Harry's hand. "I didn't mean to do that."

Now that he was out of the room, at least he could get to his potion. He began charging down the hall, Harry rushing after him. "Go away Potter!"

"No! Why are you acting so loony?" He called out, breathless.

"I'm not!" Draco shouted the password and dashed through the common room, running to the boy's dormitory.

He pulled his box of potion, uncorking it only to have someone knock it out of his hands. Harry stood, glaring down at him. "What is that?"

"None of you're fucking business."

Harry's eyes widened slightly, but the determination still shined within them. "Tell me."

Draco felt tears prick at his eyes - every emotion was heightened, and it was taking its toll on him - he shook his head. "I can't, I can't, it's the only way! No one can know! My father, oh my father!"

"What are you talking about?" Harry asked, confused.

"I'M GAY HARRY! I'M FUCKING GAY AND THIS POTION IS THE ONLY WAY TO FIX IT!" Draco broke  down then, collapsing in on himself, crying openly, not even caring that Harry saw. 

he was doomed. His life was forever over. Either he took the potion or became a disgrace to the Malfoy name. Either he killed his love or ended up in a loveless marriage with a snivelling woman. He gagged on his own salvia, hot tears running down his face.

That's when he heard an odd noise coming from... Harry?

 He looked up through his wet lashes to see Harry laughing hysterically. He held his stomach, eyes squeezed shut. "I'm...I'm sorry. It's just, oh god," he wiped a tear from his eye, "that's what this is all about?"

"Yes!" Draco said defensively. 

"It's okay Draco, I'm bisexual. It's not a crime!" Harry sat down next to Draco, putting an arm around him. "You don't need some potion to fix you when there's nothing wrong."

"I can't produce an heir if I'm gay! My father will despise me!"

Harry shook his head. "There are ways around that, Dray. Is this why you've been acting so odd lately."

Draco sniffed, nodding pitifully. 

Harry shook his head, smiling as he pulled Draco to his chest. "You're fine. Now stop being a drama queen and suck it up, then we can find you a boyfriend."

But I want you. Draco nodded, still upset. "Okay."

Harry grabbed the box of potion. "And you won't be needing anymore of this."

"Wait!" Draco reached out towards him.

"What?" Harry said, turning back to him.

"Don't, don't tell anyone else. I don't want anyone to know yet."

Harry nodded, "Sure thing."

With that, the boy headed out the door, taking the last of Draco's potion with him.

-_-_-_-_-

    Harry was still thinking about Draco. How could he try and destroy his feelings just because he liked guys? He sighed, walking through the halls. He spotted Cedric and decided that he wasn't going to let duty stop him from what he wanted.

He marched over to Cedric. "Hey."

"Hi Harry." Cedric said, breaking into a wide smile.

"Do you, ahem, do you want to go to the Yule Ball with me?" Harry said with a small crack in his voice, but still with confidence. 

Cedric nodded. "Yeah."

Harry grinned, grabbing Cedric's yellow tie and pulling him down and onto his lips. Cedric recovered quickly, wrapping his arms around Harry. The Slytherin's long tongue snaked into the Hufflepuff's mouth, moving his hands to his shoulders. 

Cedric, overjoyed, pulled away, grinning like a madman. "What was that for?"

Harry shrugged, holding him closer. "Just wanted to, don't mind do you?"

The blonde shook his head, closing the distance between them once more after saying, "Not at all."

Neither noticed Draco, who was watching the scene in horror. His original plan was to ask Harry to the ball (as "friends" of course), but the smooth words he'd planned to say flew from his tongue as he watched Harry bite Cedric's lip, passionately kissing him. Draco couldn't help but imagine himself in Cedric's position. Tears began rolling down his cheeks, and he resolved himself, turning away and running down the hall, tearing up the note of thanks he'd written to Harry for helping him get over himself. 

He wouldn't be caught off guard again. He wouldn't let his emotions control him. He would be the perfect Slytherin again. Still, he couldn't bare the stinging pain of heartbreak. But this time, he'd use it. Never again would he make the same mistake of letting himself grow close enough to someone, that they could hurt him.