So, I was rewatching Twilight to make fun of it and I had to include memes from it y'all

~~~

The next day, I woke up to the sound of my new "brother" coughing from the yoga room which was now his new bedroom. I wiped my eyes and slumped out, yawning.

As I passed his room, I noticed the door was open. So, I peeked inside and saw Mr. Aizawa placing a four-finger glove over Tomura's hand.

"Now. Say it with me. Conceal."

Tomura added, "Don't feel."

And in unison, they finished, "Don't let it show."

"Uhh," I couldn't help but sound.

They both turned to me.

"Oh, (Y/N). I was just talking to your new brother."

Tomura wheezed and choked on some Chex Mix. So, that happened.

"I was just gonna pay Shouto a visit. He's gonna help tutor me!" I beamed.

"Tutoring? Is that code for—"

"No, we won't be kissing!" I scowled. "He's just gonna help me out a bit."

"Okay. Well, if he does lean in to kiss you, just tell him that your dad knows how to use a gun."

"Hnngh!" I whined.

"No whining. Now, Dancing with the Pro Heroes is coming on and I can't miss it. Cya."

Mr. Aizawa burrito'd himself in his sleeping bag and rolled down the stairs, crashing into various objects from what I could hear.

So, I glanced back at Tomura's new room and saw him hanging a life-sized poster of Ariana Grande on his wall. That's when I skedaddled.

I think Shouto's house was somewhere outside the city—so, I needed a more practical way to travel rather than walking. Plus, I was just too lazy.

I decided to use the train to get there. I went to the station, purchased a ticket, then hopped on.

I found an empty booth and sat in it. While I was waiting, I filed my nails with my limited-edition James Charles emery board.

Suddenly, I heard Vector's theme song from Despicable Me play.

"Hey," Denki, who was sitting in the booth in front of me, smirked.

I continued filing my nails, not speaking.

He got up and tiptoed over to sit beside me.

"I'm applying for a new Hero agency going by the name of Chargebolt."

I only scooted away.

Denki continued, "It's a galvanic term represented by my Quirk with both charge and boltage."

I was already on the far side of the booth.

Suddenly, he slid right next to me. "CHARGEBOLT! That's me. Cuz I'm stopping crimes with both CHARGE and BOLTAGE! OH, YEAAAAAHHHHH!!"

Seeing I wasn't interested, he kept on going, "Check out my new weapon. Lemme demonstrate."

He pulled out this piece of circular equipment that was part of his hero costume.

"CIRCLE CHARGER!! OH, YESSSSS. Fires my Quirk wherevs I want it to go since I have a hard time making it do what I wanna without gear. Ever seen one before? No, you haven't cuz I smuggled it. Wanna demonstration?"

I whipped my head around and went, "What!?"

Before I could stop him, he shot his electricity through the circular mechanism and completely fried the train—causing it to come to a screeching halt.

"DENKI!!" I yelled.

The people around us started booing and blaming Denki for janking the train.

"I didn't mean to! I was just testing out—"

But someone flicked some pudding in his eye before he could finish.

I stood up and stomped over to the door, looking out the window to see where we are. The train was parked on a tall bridge in the middle of the city above a large river.

"WHYYY!?" I cried. "NOW I WON'T MAKE IT TO SHOUTO'S HOUSE!"

"Well, maybe they'll get it goin' back up!" Denki chuckled.

"YOU—YOU LITTLE—" Before I could lunge at him, someone grabbed the scruff of my shirt and held me back.

"No point in doing that. He'd probably electrocute you too."

"Hanta?" I turned back and yeah; it was him.

But behind him was Mina too.

"OMG, hey, girl!" she waved cheerfully.

Why where they here? Was it the luck of me being an anime protagonist?

"Hi. . .?" I stuttered. "Are you guys the only ones here?"

"No, Bakugou and Kirishima are here too," Hanta answered.

I peered over the crowd and saw this explosive ball of ash-blonde hair sticking up. I smiled and shouted, "Katsuki!!" Then shuffled over and pulled him into a long hug.

"Name's not Katsuki, lil girl."

I slowly looked up and saw this tall, slim man with a black mask and an orange hoodie that had the letters 'F' and 'G' printed on it. "Didja want my autograph or something?" he shamelessly asked.

"Whomst—"

"The name's Fat Gum. But now I'm Slim Jim."

At that, I began to back away. However, I knocked into someone.

"Huh?" I turned and saw Eijiro.

"Oh, hey, (Y/N)!" he grinned.

"Phew, someone sane's here."

Suddenly, I noticed something in his backpack that was sticking out. It was a baby. But not just any baby. The CGI baby from Twilight.

"Uh, who's that?" I asked.

"Oh, my niece 'Resume'."

"Resume? As in resuming a movie?"

"Yes."

The baby started at me, not blinking, with one facial expression. It looked like a robot more than anything else.

"Hey, look. Chucky the Hutt," I heard someone heckle from the next car. It was Katsuki. He slumped over to us and snarked, "What is it? The latest Build-A-Bear recall?"

"Have some sensitivity!" I scolded.

"Sensitivity or sympathy? I mean, look at her. Who's she 'sposed to marry one day? Ice Age Baby?"

"You don't have to look," Eijiro scoffed.

"How can I help but not to? Its eyes are following me around. Its image is seared into my brain."

"It's not an it. It's a she," he corrected.

Katsuki countered, "No, it is It the clown."

Who know Katsuki was so good with kids?

"So, what's her name?" Katsuki asked.

Eijiro answered, "Resume."

"JUST PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR SO HELP ME—"

"She's only one, man. Don't be so harsh!"

"Why not? The world will be harsher. Might as well get a head start."

"Katsuki, you're so vicious!" I cut in.

At that moment, the CGI baby reached its plastic-looking hand out to touch Katsuki's cheek to stroke it slowly up and down.

"THAT THING TOUCHED ME! IT'S ALIVEEEE!" Katsuki screamed and ran to the next car.

I turned to Eijiro. "I hope Resume's feelings aren't hurt."

"They're not. Don't worry." He suddenly held up a remote.

"What's that?"

"Watch." He pressed a button and the baby ejected through the roof and into the deep, blue sea.

"What did you just do!?" I asked, totally shocked.

"Sorry, wrong button. Lemme get it back, hol' on."

He pushed another button and the baby levitated back through the hole that it had blasted through. It then fell into my arms and said in a robotic voice, "Ma. Ma."

I yeeted it behind me and shuddered.

"IT'S CRAWLIN' TOWARD MEEE!" Katsuki squealed like a girl and jumped into my arms from the car behind us.

I struggled to hold Katsuki up. So, I asked Eijiro, "Why? And where did you get that thing?"

"It was on a late-night infomercial. They were practically paying people to take 'em," he explained. "It's called Bella's Bouncin' Baby."

"Wait, it's not real?" Katsuki asked.

Eijiro held up the remote. "It's a robot, dude."

"Then why'd you say it was your niece?"

"Playin' a prank, okay? Gosh. Get off my back."

"Well, in that case." Katsuki hopped out of my arms, seized the CGI baby, and chucked it so hard that it blew a hole into the conductor's cabin and knocked him out.

Suddenly, a voice came over the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We had almost finished fixing the technical difficulties, but due to our conductor now being unconscious, it may take a few more hours until he regains consciousness. Until then, please enjoy this relaxing playlist from the album Sounds of the Ocean: The Call of the Humpback Whale to calm your nerves~"

At that, random whales started screeching all around me through the low-quality intercom.

"KATSUKI!!!!" I raged, glaring him. "YOU BETTER FIX THIS!"

"Wanna make out?"

"KISSING AIN'T THE ANSWER FOR EVERYTHANG!!!"

"Right. Let's meditate and fall asleep like Hanta over there."

I looked over and saw Hanta, who was leaning on the shoulder of somebody's granny and snoring louder than the whales.

I turned to Katsuki and groaned loudly to get my point across. "We have no food!!"

"Cheeto?" he offered me, holding one up.

"What am I supposed to drink after I get that thing stuck in my throat!?"

"You're 'sposed to drink somethin' with these things?"

I facepalmed and stormed off to the next car. In there, it was like a totally different world. Midnight was in the center of the aisle, teaching all the women tai chi.

"What's going on?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"We just decided to relax to the whale music," Midnight cooed.

"Why, yes! I'm feeling much better already," Momo replied as she leisurely lifted her foot above her head.

So, I climbed over the seats, dodging the women in the aisle, and escaped into the next car. In there, was a rave going on. But they actually had food and beverages here. They were also dancing to some sweet tunes other than the whale tunes. Rainbow strobe lights provided by Yuga were bouncing off all the walls.

I managed to grab a Dixie cup full of liquid that reminded me of the rainbow Gummy Bear soda from Katsuki's house party all those chapters ago.

Speak of the devil, I turned around and knocked right into Katsuki, spilling my drink all over his black tank top.

"Why are you following me?" I asked.

"I was thirsty, sweetheart," he snarked.

I asked, "Well, have you seen the other guys?"

"Why? Who ya lookin' for?"

"No one! I'm just asking."

"I see how it is," he responded, hurt.

"What's your deal? You always act jealous!" I angsted.

"I know I'm the one for you. I'm just waiting for you to know."

"I can't believe I kissed you!" I began to shout, earning the looks of strangers.

"Why? Ya don't believe dreams come true?"

I hmphed.

He hmphed back.

But this time, I really hmphed. "Goodbye, Katsuki!" I turned up my nose and snootily walked away from him with my arms crossed.

But before I got too far, he grabbed my elbow and said, "Wait. That's illegal."

"No, this is a free country."

"Okay, what I meant to say was—I'm sorry."

"No, you're not," I angsted more. "Prove it."

At that, he wrapped his arms around me and drew me close. I rested my head against his shoulder and he stroked my hair. He then mumbled out, "I'm sorry I threw the baby. . .and knocked the conductor out."

Suddenly, a little grandpa looked up at us, beaming a toothless smile. "Aw, honeymoon couple."

Ignoring him, Katsuki continued, "What I mean to say was—I'm holdin' out for you. I shouldn't have joked about it. And if you're mad about anything else I did that you're waiting for me to figure out, well—you know that may take a long, long time. So, sorry."

I was originally going to Shouto's house to learn quick maffs, so, how did I end up in Katsuki's arms. . .again? Was it the luck of me being an anime protagonist that kept pulling us together? Or was he just seriously hotter than the rest of them? Why were the convicts always the cute ones? If there were a Nomu Apocalypse, I'd definitely wanna be by this guy's side.

So, I pulled away and gazed into his crimson eyes that pierced through my soul and into my heart.

"Thanks, Katsuki."

"What can I say except you're welcome?" he laughed and kissed me on the forehead before letting me go.

At that moment, Mirio permeated through the door while T-posing and bellowed really slow, "OK, SO BASICALLY, I'M MIRIO—AND I'M HERE TO RESCUE YOU."

The sound of his voice (and the fact they he lost his clothes somewhere along the way) triggered my PTSD. I couldn't help but feel like the walls were caving in on me. And the strobe lights were causing me to feel like I was spinning upside down. In that moment, I dramatically swooned like Princess Petch. As I felt my knees buckle, I clasped onto Katsuki's shirt and mumbled, "I don't feel so good, Mr. Stark."

He dropped his Dixie cup and bag of Cheetos then caught me in his arms as the lights went out.

~~~

Thank you for reading this monstrosity