Mom: *snapping fingers to a song* I feel like I'm in the Jets! I could be in a gang!

Me: You're a middle aged mother.

Mom: I could be in the Middle Aged Mother Gang!

Me: What would you even do, complain about your kids?

Mom: Hired assassins.

Me: ...

Mom: We'd never get caught. Do I look like an assassin?

Me: Well, now you do.