Me: Where do you want to sleep tonight?

Dad: Answer the question before I poke you in the eye!

Me: ...I asked the question, Dad.

Dad: Oh. I'm not good with English. I'm really tired.

Me: It's okay, Dad.

Dad: Stop making ack-

Me: ...

Me: What, Dad?

Dad: I only got four or five hours of sleep last night.
*
Dad: *lying face down on bed*

Brother: What's wrong, Dad?

Dad: IM TIRED AND NOBODY WILL LET ME SLEEP
*
Brother: *jumps onto Dad's back*

Me: *shoving him off* You can't do that! His muscles hurt! He's like a little kid - you can't just jump on them because they'll get hurt!

Dad: *kicking feet* I WANNA GO TO BEEED
*
Me: Where do you want to sleep, Dad? Answer the question in three seconds. Three...two...one!

Dad: I DONT EFFING CARE