My dad was trying out a hover board that my cousins have.

Cousin: See? You're doing it!

Dad: I'M GONNA DIE!!!
*
Uncle: Now lean forward super fast.

Dad: Don't test my abilities.

Me: That's cute. He calls it ability.
*
I was in the car.

Dad: *distantly* I'm gonna buy one!

Me: *slams open the car door* DAD NO