I don't own destiny.

He knew he had screwed up. He knew it the moment comms had dropped and he couldn't contact Loki anymore. Ashura was going to be so pissed with him and he didn't know how he was going to tell her. It had already been a few days since she had returned and yet she had not once come to see him, she had gone back to the reef today to check the damages and she hadn't returned yet. He knew it was only bad news if she had yet to come back and tell him the status of the reef.

He sighed and sat down on the steps near the vanguard table. "You made a choice and now you have to live with that choice." Zavala sighed and he contemplated this choice. Did he really have to send the warlock out? No, but was there a reason he sent the man? Yes. The man had offered his assistance upon hearing of the downfall of the Awoken army. He paced the room once more and sighed as he looked down to his gauntlet and began typing. Ashura's image popped up and he sent for a voice call.

She picked up and he could tell she wasn't in the best emotional state from her voice alone. She sounded like she had been crying or throwing up, or both. "We have lost one of the guardians we have sent, would you mind scouring the dreadnaught for his emergency beacon signal?" he asked and she was silent for only a moment. "Of course, Cayde..." she said but then another slight pause and she was speaking once more. "Don't you go missing on me too, I don't want to be looking for a trifecta of missing men here." she said and his heart fluttered softly, the ticking making itself known loud and clear.

He shouldn't be feeling this way about something so serious, and yet here he was, grateful she didn't want him to go missing too. He released a sigh and chuckled softly. "I can't go missing Ashura, they never let me leave." he said and she made a noise of slight amusement on the other side. He could hear her rummaging around and figured she was moving to stand once more. "I'm going to hurry to my ship, I suppose you and Zavala can brief me on the way." she said and more rummaging and indistinct chatter echoed through the room before she projected them to her ships holo-table.

He took in the sight of her and the shining silver of her enraged eyes was visible even through the hologram of her. Zavala began giving her details on what they knew of the weapon that took out the awoken fleet and yet he couldn't find it in himself to pay attention to the words escaping the man's mouth. He was so focused on Ashura and her mannerisms that he tuned everything else out.

Flickers of memories of Ivara played in his mind and he could line the two of them up the exact same way down to the slightest of movements. Their imaged overlayed on one another and he was amazed once more. Ivara's blue eyes mimicked the rage in Ashura's silver ones and he couldn't help but try and remember what had gotten her so angry. He continued to think it over when the memory finally surfaced. Ivara had been so angry because this was the day that he had sold his soul to Braytech.

Why that memory had been buried so deep he didn't know, but he was happy it was coming back to him. He wanted all the memories he could get because he was losing them because of his reboots. She was yelling at him for being so foolish and he couldn't quite understand why she was so angry. He had done it to pay his debts to them... oh... that's right... she had sold her own life to pay his debts too. They had both been scammed by Braytech.

That was how he had ended up in this body in the first place... they had become exo because of his debts. He wanted to delve further into his memories but he was ripped from his thoughts by zavala yelling Ashura's name. "Ashura!! We lost track of your ship are you there?" he called and cayde listened intently for Ashura to reply but there was no response coming through from her. "We are here, Zavala, don't worry we are ok." Misra called and he breathed a sigh of relief, as did Zavala.

"No thanks to this psycho bitch who crashed her ship into the cannon!" Lion yelled and Cayde gripped the table in anger. "What the fuck Ashura?!" He snapped but she gave him no response for a few seconds, but only told him to bring in the calvary... the lucky seven. The woman was insane. She was supposed to be the calvary but she was just insane at the moment. "Ashura, I must tell you something. You're looking for one guardian but we sent another to find him as well and have lost track of him as well." Zavala said and she was silent for a moment before she asked who it was.

They got to talking about why Danny was there and he wondered if Ashura knew he wished to die like Nora had. a few more seconds of listening and he knew she did. He listened as they discussed this and she was willing to let her friend go this time. Not because she were mad at him but because she cared about him and his wishes. "I have been looking into my past as well." she said and he snapped his head towards the hologram of her.

"And what did you find?" Ikora asked her and he clammed up. He knew what she would find and he didn't want her to find that out yet. Images of him sitting in a medical room getting a physical done flickered through his mind. The doctor doing the physical looked like a long-haired Ashura. But her name was Marie Reyes. A doctor from Spain who had been brought in on the project due to her twin sister Kira's extensive knowledge of how to turn humans into Exo.

He had flirted with her in his anxiousness. He remembered that much. She seemed unamused at first, but the small smile that tugged at her lips had portrayed something different. Of course, Ashura didn't remember any of this, but he did. And no matter how much it hurt to know she was one of the ones who did this to him, he still cared about her. Her gentle touch as she prodded his stomach. The gentle ghosting of her fingertips over his skin was still etched into his memory to this day. She was the one he could never fully forget and he never knew why.

He didn't want her to remember that because it would destroy her knowing she had helped put him in this body. He knew it would. So, he turned to leave. He wanted to be left with his thoughts for a while. "Cayde, we are not done here. Where are you going?" Zavala called after him and he turned to look at them once more. "But I am." he said and made his way out of the room. He had heard her say she wanted to figure out who some of the Exo were and he knew she would eventually find out what she had done to him.

He didn't blame her as it was hundreds of years ago that this had happened, but he didn't want her to blame herself and avoid him because of what she had helped do. He sighed as he made his way to his room and sat on the bed. "You can't be upset with her wanting to know about her past Cayde." Ivara said and he nodded. "I know... I'm only worried that she will avoid me." he said and Ivara scoffed.

"Avoid you? She can't even do that. You would never let her." she mused and he chuckled as he thought about that. She was right. He would never let her avoid him because she was one of his best friends and he loved her too much to let her avoid him. "Ivara... I think I'm going to power down for a while and rummage through memories." he said and she was silent for a moment, but then stopped her hovering to lay on the pillow beside him. He closed his eyes and released a sigh as he powered off for a little while.

When he woke, he was being told that Ashura had returned and was in the medical bay unconscious once more. She needed to stop making this a habit because it was just going to continue to stress him out. He leaned up and stretched his mechanical muscles out and took off in a leisurely stroll towards the med bay. He started to think the med bay was Ashura's favorite place because she always ended up there.

When he got there she was already making her way out of the room. He opened his arms to her and she dove into his embrace. "Whoa... why so emotional?" he asked the moment he felt the tears soak through his armor. She leaned back and he was caught off guard by the sheer amount of tears rushing over her cheeks. "I had a nightmare cayde... you left me behind." she said and he chuckled and ruffled her hair before he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "You know I would never leave you behind, you just gotta teach those short little legs to run." he said and she bit her lip and looked up at him once more.

"Oh, you meant that kind of leave behind... well as I said, I'll never leave you behind. It's just never going to happen so don't sweat it." he said and she narrowed her eyes at him. She didn't believe him but that was fine because he believed it and knew it was never going to happen as long as he could manage it. "You better not because I don't want to lose you too." she said and he chuckled as he hugged her to him. "Could it be you love me?" he asked and she rolled her eyes.

He wasn't going to push it because he knew the limit that she would let him go before she started to get annoyed with him. "You wanna go see how things are going against oryx?" he asked and she nodded. He pulled her more into his side as they walked and he couldn't help but feel so content with her right by his side. He could forgive her for anything she ever did because she meant so much to him. He just never wanted to see her hurt.

They made their way into the room and the first thing he saw was that damnable floating rock hovering over his map once more. "Hey! I said it before and I'll say it again. Get your rock off my map!" he snapped and was about to swipe at it, but it went flying past him to Ashura. Eris seemed quite surprised at this but only cracked a small smile. He looked at Ashura and saw she was not only levitating the orb but her knife as well. A sense of excitement flooded his being and he jumped towards her slightly. "Ooooh that's so freaky! Do it again!" he said and she just giggled at him.

The thumping in his chest was drowning out all of the other sounds in the room at that one little bit of laughter. Dammit all he was so in love with her. She was so amazing and her laughter brought a response out of him that only Ivara ever had. He wished he could just tell her how he felt for her, but he knew it wouldn't go well, especially since she had started dating the prince. But in this moment, her simplistic joy was there for him and him alone and he was going to take it for what he could get from it.

As soon as the moment had come it was over and she was right back on topic with what was going on with the dreadnaught. It wasn't long before everyone but her noticed the orange glow that was forming around her shoulders. He reached out and touched it and it burned at him, singeing his glove ever so slightly. The solar glow turned into a small bird and hopped onto the table and Ikora's eyes went wide as she recognized the bird.

"Osiris calls upon you Ashura." Ikora whispered and he sighed. This was going to be a whole mess in itself seeing as the prophetic man was a handful on his own and now, he was looking for her. They had all read the books of Osiris. They knew what the prophecies foretold, but they didn't know if they were real or not. He didn't want to believe in them but he knew they were starting to come true.

He didn't like the idea of that though because at a certain point Osiris couldn't see anything anymore and he can't figure out why his visions all went dark. That could mean many things but one is that it means his death comes to him. He was wrought from his thoughts when he realized Ashura was gone from the room. It was as if she had slipped out when everyone was busy contemplating the phoenix.

He looked up to the hologram of the dreadnaught and chuckled the moment he saw her beacon light up there. "I found her." he said and Zavala looked over at him. He pointed to the hologram and Zavala sighed as he began trying to establish communications with them. He however, was busy watching the feed from her ghost. He thought it over and came to the conclusion that the reason he was so mesmerized by her movements was because she was a phenomenal fighter.

She fought differently than other guardians and it was a primal type of warfare that he had never seen before. He loved watching her as she used her bare hands as weapons against enemies that weapons had been the only way to vanquish before. She was different from everyone else and he had known this way back when she was the one screening him for the Exo program. He looked up and saw two familiar titans standing off to the side awkwardly. "Hey, Rev, Artemis. Could you do me a favor?" He asked and they nodded.

"Ashura and her group are out there rescuing guardians that got stuck on the dreadnaught. Do you mind going to pick them up? Ashura might need a lift as well so stick around for a minute if you can." he said and they nodded and took off soon after. He knew those two were wanting in on the action. This was where he was when they all returned from the dreadnaught. He was still looking over sketches and images he had been given of the dreadnaught when she walked in once more.

He knew she was going to be punished for running off, so he was plotting on what they could do until her punishment was lifted. He listened as Zavala scolded her and put her on strict tower duty and she argued back with him and he had to agree with her. She had just saved thirty guardians without being told to, but he also had to agree with Zavala. She could have gotten her or her teammates killed. It was a thin grey area and he was going to remain in the neutral.

She made her way over to him and she was still grumbling under her breath which Zavala found unamusing, especially since she was cursing him out in Eliksni. He wasn't going to get in on that because he knew it would get him yelled at as well. He didn't feel like getting yelled at by Zavala. He looked over to her and she seemed to be calming down. "You wanna see what I look at all day?" he asked and she nodded. She made her way over to him and he couldn't help but want to be closer to her.

He walked around behind her and caged her in his arms with his chest to her back. She didn't make a move to escape so he began pointing to things on the map and began telling her what they were. She asked about a few other things and he could either tell her what they were or they were unexplored areas as of right now. They went on like this for hours just talking about his maps and discussion all the things she and other guardians had found.

"I'm hungry Cayde, would you like to go get something to eat?" she asked and he nodded, finally releasing her from his arms. He enjoyed being that close to her because she made him feel so many things. She grabbed his hand and pulled him behind her. He wished he could tell her how this all made him feel but he knew he couldn't, not yet anyways. He had to wait for his time, but he wasn't going to wait forever.

They sat down at the ramen stand and two bowls of ramen were placed before them. She immediately dug into hers, but paused and looked at him as he was about to take a bite of the meat from his bowl. She grabbed it with her chopsticks and eat it. She had grabbed it straight from his mouth and popped it in hers. He froze and looked over at her in confusion. She just burst out laughing at him and dammit if he could blush he would be.

His form of blushing was the steam that escaped his jaws and he wished it away. She picked up another piece of meat from his bowl and offered it to him with her chop sticks. He bit down on it and ensured it wouldn't leave his mouth this time. She only continued to giggle as she stole noodles from his bowl and eat them. This woman was something else. She had her own food sitting right in front of her and yet she was digging right into his like he had offered it up.

He chuckled and draped an arm over her shoulder and she leaned into him. If every day could be this simple, he would be happy forever. But he knew this wouldn't last because eventually she would be back out on patrols and whatnot. And that day came sooner than he had hoped it would. But they had spent every day together and he taught her everything he knew about map making in the time they did have.

She turned out to have a knack for map making and he was proud of her. But it was time to let her go and he didn't want to. Zavala asked her if she felt comfortable going out on patrols again and he could only stand by and watch as she got slightly excited. He couldn't focus on the dance Nina was trying to show him because he was so focused on Ashura. He was trapped in hell because all he wanted was to see someone else but he could only see her and she was focused on getting Uldren back.

He felt so left behind and used. He felt like she had become a different person right before his eyes and there was nothing that he could do about it. He was so jealous over her determination to find the man. He briefly wondered if she would ever look for him the way she looked for Uldren. He doubted it honestly. No matter how close the two of them had gotten over the past month, he knew Uldren was always number one in her heart.

She took off out the room with the little scraps of paper and he sighed as he looked down at the map of mars she had drawn. He walked over to Zavala and was about to toss an arm over the man's shoulder but the look he got thwarted the attempt rather swiftly. "Yes, Cayde?" he asked and Cayde retracted the arm he was about to drape over his shoulder. "Done getting angry and yelling at her, are we?" Cayde asked and Zavala gave him a sideways glance. Cayde put his hands on the table and released a sigh.

"Zavala... she's changed. I don't know if it is a good thing or a bad thing, but I'm scared for her." Cayde said and Zavala turned to fully face him now. He didn't like how she had changed in the manner of it felt she was moving away from him. "I understand Cayde, but I have a question for you." Zavala said and Cayde looked at him oddly. "Shoot." "Does she treat you any differently?" he asked and he stopped to think it over, tapping his chin with his index finger.

"No..."

"Then she is still the same person. However, sometimes the people we love find someone else they love. It doesn't mean she loves you any less Cayde, it just means she has someone she wants to spend her life with. In a different manner than a friend would." Ikora interjected and Zavala nodded. "Cayde... She still loves you, never forget that. And as we have all noticed she has changed, but sometimes life changes you." Zavala said and the exo sighed as he rubbed the back of his hood. Cayde looked out the windows, only for a hand to find itself on his shoulder. He knew it was Zavala.

"Cayde..."

"Hm?" he asked, turning back around to see Ashura standing in the doorway. Her eyes looked so... sad, hurt, and angry. He had to add the angry in there because he could see it loud and clear. "Ashura, are you ok?" he asked and Ikora smiled softly. "Cayde... how dare you doubt me..." She growled and he threw his hands in the air. "Hey, in my defense-" He began but she rushed towards him and he flinched away, but instead of the usual expected shoulder charge... her arms wrapped around him tightly. "Ah shit..." He grumbled to himself as he hugged her back.

"You are an ass."

"I know."

She huffed and looked back up at him as she stepped away from his embrace. "You three... you are my family and I love you all... each of you have guided me in ways I never would have understood before, but now that I feel like things are starting to fall into place... I feel like it may be alright..." She whispered and they listened intently. Especially him, he needed to hear everything she had to say. "I know I haven't been the greatest student for any of you, but I want you to understand that I most likely wouldn't be here right now if not for you all... when I first got here, I was reckless and a danger to everyone around me... I was an outcast... you made me someone..." She whispered and Cayde rolled his eyes, only to receive a punch to the gut. He never knew she could get all sappy like this. He liked it.

"Either way... I want to thank all of you." She said and Zavala offered a small nod, while Ikora smiled. "We told you she still loved you Cayde, now stop being so fragile." Ikora mused only for Cayde to flip her the bird. "No thank you." Ikora sighed in amusement while Ashura shook her head. "Go find your boyfriend with the shitty haircut and leave me alone." Cayde grumbled and that familiar flame sparked in her silver eyes. "Take it to the crucible." Zavala warned and Ashura smirked but turned on her heel and left the room anyways.

"You had doubts about her?" Zavala asked and he shook his head as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Not anymore, Zavala... Not anymore. She's still the same abusive woman she has always been." he said, but still glanced over to the door to see if she was still standing there, which she wasn't. He released a sigh and looked over to Ikora who was watching him with a smile. "We told you so." she said in amusement and he glared at her. "Shut it, Ikora."

He couldn't help but feel upset that they were teasing him, but he understood it as well. They would have preferred for him and Ashura to have been together, but they knew it wasn't going to happen anytime soon. They also knew it was Taboo of a vanguard leader to be in love with one of their subordinates. Which is why Nina and Zavala still weren't together even though everyone knew the two of them liked one another.

Which brings him to the point of why Zavala had been so hard on Nina, he cared for her and didn't want her to get caught up in something she couldn't get out of. Speaking of Nina. He knew she was going to go with Ashura, it was her obligation. She had to see if the prince was alright. He sighed as he watched her run out of the room and he looked over to Zavala, who showed the slightest signs of her loss.

It was well hidden but Cayde could tell Zavala didn't want her to leave his side. They may not be together but they had a bond that everyone could see. And everyone knew Nina was in love with Zavala. Zavala seemed to enjoy her presence though. He glanced over to the ghost who was scanning over his maps and he sighed. She was trying to remain as far from the situation as possible, she knew he was upset that Ashura was going to look for the man once more.

"Hey..." he called and she turned to face him as she had finished scanning the maps. "Yes, Cayde?" she asked and he sighed. "Are you ok?" he asked and she hovered around him curiously. "I am fine. I just worry about you is all." she said and he nodded. He could understand her worry. He didn't want the man at the tower and yet he knew Ashura was going to find him. She had studied the maps and scouting reports too thoroughly to not be able to find him.

It was inevitable.

And it truly was. After three hours of searching, she called in her return to the tower. The feeling of dread that consumed him made him feel like crap. What right did he have to not want to see his best friend happy He was disgusted with himself for feeling this way but he knew it was because he didn't like her boy fiend. And yes, he meant fiend. He didn't trust the man as far as he could throw him. And as far as that was, he still didn't trust him.

He had his reasons though. So it wasn't just his jealousy taking over like many have thought. The man was a sneaky one and preferred to keep his secrets to himself as cayde did, but he didn't think some of those secrets deserved to stay hidden. Royalty or not someone had to expose the man as the piece of shit he was. And Cayde hoped eventually he could show Ashura the man wasn't the person she thought he was.

She was so blinded by her love that it showed in her ignoring all the subtle ways he showed he was a narcissist. He followed Zavala down to the ship dock and sighed as he saw Ashura's ship. The door opened and they all started to board the ship. "How is he?" Zavala asked, scanning the ship for Ashura. "He's ok... I believe. He needs rest and to get some food in him, but I think other than getting his strength back up he will be ok." Ashura mumbled as she used her smaller form to scoot Uldren forwards so she could get him off the floor.

Zavala crouched beside Uldren and scooped him up before Ashura could even complain. Good thing too because Cayde sure wasn't going to touch the man. Something felt ominous about him but cayde couldn't quite place it. Ashura rushed to follow after Zavala who was walking towards the medical ward at such a swift pace it was hard for her to keep up. She brushed past Cayde, who was staring at the man in Zavala's grasp he couldn't get over the fact something felt off about him right now.

"Ashura." Cayde grabbed her arm and she stopped abruptly. "Are you ok?" he asked and she nodded. She didn't look like it though, she looked like something was bothering her. "Yeah... I'm much better now... I'm honestly surprised I even found him." She whispered and he nodded, although his posture told her more than his words did. He wished she hadn't found him... Ashura frowned at him, so he sighed and released her arm. "You know... the only reason you found him was because he wanted to be found..." He said softly and she nodded. "And... that's what I'm kind of worried about. He was injured and wanted to be found." She sighed and he opened his arms to her slightly.

"I'm sure he was waiting for you to find him..." Cayde said and she stepped into his careful embrace. "I hope so," She whispered as she peered back to the doorway Zavala had vanished through a few minutes earlier. "I'm going to go check on him." She said and he nodded as he scratched the back of his head. She took off and he crossed his arms over his chest. He waited for Zavala to come out and he motioned for the titan to follow him.

"Can we trust him?" Cayde asked and Zavala frowned deeply. Zavala was silent until they got a good distance away from the ward. When he spoke, his words were uneasy. "No. Not yet. For now, we have to act welcoming until he proves he is trustworthy." Zavala muttered, trying not to let any prying ears hear in case his words found their way back to Ashura. "Zavala..." Cayde began and he looked at the taller awoken beside him. "I don't know if I can do this." he said and Zavala frowned at him.

"We have to be welcoming Cayde... You know exactly what will happen if we usher him out." Zavala bit at the hunter, who sighed but nodded. "Rogue Light bearers are such an issue." He sighed and Zavala nodded. "We cannot have Ashura drifting, especially since she is becoming stronger every time we turn around." Zavala muttered and Cayde nodded solemnly. "Zavala!" Ashura's voice came from around the corner and the two went rigid. They turned to face the shorter woman who was smiling at them softly. "Can I get a little help?" She asked and they nodded.

They followed her back to the ward where they were helping to lift Uldren onto the bed and failing because despite his exhausted state, he was fighting against Sakura. Not really fighting per se, but struggling against her and reopening wounds. Cayde looked the man in the eyes and he had seen it, the darkness in those eyes. Zavala grabbed Uldren's arm lightly and the man stopped struggling long enough for Sakura to put him under once more. Ashura watched as they set him on the bed so Sakura could assist in healing him.

He looked back to Ashura and she seemed oblivious of the current situation at hand. This was something similar to what Ashura had described to them about Danny. Uldren was being taken and he didn't know if there was anything they could do for him. They would have to wait and see if anything changed with Sakura's healing. He watched as Sakura set to work her hands glowing green as she worked. He was amazed by her abilities and dared to think that she was a better medic than Ashura, and this was only because she could do it with her bare hands rather than needing tools to heal people.

"You don't have to sit here and watch me work if you don't want to. I was trying not to injure him further but if he starts trying to fight me full on, I will put him back under forcefully." she said and he nodded. "Can't you just put him down like a bad dog?" he asked in amusement and she gave him a dirty look. Seems she didn't think the joke was as funny as he did. "Look I get it, you don't trust him, but Ashura does and she would prefer to have him alive." she sighed and he rolled his eyes. Everyone was doing this for Ashura, and the woman didn't even know it.

"You should go find her and spend some time with her before he wakes up. You might not get much of a chance after." she said as she stopped working and looked over to him. "I know you care deeply about her, so I think you should take the chance you have. I know you don't trust him either, and there's nothing we can do about it yet so we just have to endure." she said and he nodded. He made his way out of the room and took one look at her and she offered him a smile as she set to work once more.

Seems everyone but Ashura could tell how he felt about her and it frustrated him to no end. He made his way down to the ramen shop and saw that it was full of people. He blinked in confusion before he pulled back the curtain and chuckled. "Hey Ashura." Cayde called and she turned to face him with a smile. "Hey." She greeted as he plopped down beside Ino. "I see you have all found my favorite ramen shop." he mused as he watched Naruto slurp down yet another bowl of noodles. He made a slightly disturbed twitch as bowl after bowl vanished from in front of the blonde male. "Nothing is safe from Naruto; he smells ramen miles away." Shikamaru chuckled lowly as he made his way over from the shadows where he had been propped against a wall.

"So, Ashura, you open to taking on any missions, preferably secret ones between us?" he whispered and she looked over to him curiously. He liked the look of mischief in her eyes. "There's a large Fallen I need you to go see about." He said and she nodded. "Save him or kill him?" She asked and he sighed slightly. "You be the judge of that, he hasn't hurt any guardians yet, but he's very, very big for a fallen. Bigger than Krux." He said and she tilted her head at him. "How is Krux by the way?" She asked and he shrugged softly. "Petra took her to her father after the attack on Taniks and none of us have heard anything since." He said and she nodded.

"So, where is this Fallen you are worried about? Is he bigger than Taniks?" She asked and he shook his head. "About the same size, and he was last spotted out in the cosmodrome. Your tracking skills should be good enough to find him." Cayde said and she nodded.

"One more question." She cut to him, her eyes narrowed. "Is this a sanctioned assignment?" She asked and the shift in his posture was enough of an answer for her.

"Then I wont tell if you don't."