Proofreader: SMV2454
[English chapter's title by SMV2454 ]

Mom hung up the phone, but I kept staring at Phum's phone screen, which was a picture of me with a topknot, my face shiny, sleeping with my mouth slightly open, looking ugly. Phum secretly took this picture while I was dozing off in the studio while drawing. I used to complain, get upset, and delete it countless times, but this picture always came back later. I don't know which folder he saved it in, so I gave up complaining and let it be.

But let's put that aside for now. The hot topic is why Mom called Phum. What's her business? Is she trying to rekindle an old flame? If so, don't worry, because I've got a fire extinguisher ready. If that's not enough, and the fire doesn't go out, I might even pee on it. Don't expect it to catch fire again. Heh heh. I placed Phum's phone next to the lamp as the sound of water in the bathroom stopped. And why do I have to pretend to be asleep?

[smv2454: 😂]

"Hey!" Phum pressed his cold nose against my cheek, making me almost fall off the bed. This guy!
"Just playing, it's cold."

"Kissing your cheek, really kissing, not playing."

After saying that, he leaned in to kiss the other cheek before humming a tune and walking back to the dressing room to put on his clothes. Just a little bit of ravaging my body and you're in a good mood, huh? I watched the white figure walk away with an uneasy feeling because something was bothering me. Even though I told myself it was probably nothing, I couldn't help but think about it. And importantly, we shouldn't be complacent, right? Now, many questions are running through my head. Should I tell Phum that Mom called? And why did Mom call? Was it something important enough to call in the middle of the night? Or maybe she just wanted to chat as friends, and I'm overthinking it. What exactly am I overthinking?

"Staring this much, do you want to do another round of research, hmm?"

Because I was lost in thought, I didn't notice when Phum came back to lie down next to me. I sighed wearily, deliberately letting him know how fed up I was. You pervert! Does my face look like it turns you on or something? All you think about all day is that one thing. Phum turned off the bedside lamp, wrapped his arm around me, and pulled me into a tight embrace like he does every night before we sleep (even though we wake up facing away from each other in the morning). I snuggled closer into Phum's chest and gripped his shirt tightly.

I trust Phum, but I don't know about Mom.

"Phum, someone just called and asked you to call back."
"Who?"
"Mom."

Phum's warm hand, which had been gently stroking my back, stopped abruptly. He turned to grab his phone, frowning at the screen. He scrolled for a while. I thought he would put it down and come back to bed, but instead...

"Yes, Mom. What's up?"

Phum kissed my forehead lightly, turned on the bedside lamp, and walked out to the balcony to take the call. I watched him leave, feeling a flutter in my chest. I didn't mind him talking on the phone, but why did he have to go outside? Unable to answer my own question, frustration took over. I rolled to the other side of the bed, hugging the giant teddy bear Phum had bought me before his trip to Italy. It sat slumped by the headboard, while its son–Sickly perched cutely on top. The bear's soft texture was comforting but not warm—not like Phum's embrace. What were they talking about? Was it such a secret that I, his current partner, couldn't know? I buried my face in the bear's belly. Sigh. When did I become such a fool? This isn't good.

"Why are you lying there? You'll fall off the bed." Phum came back after a long while, pulling me back to share the same pillow. I tried to resist, but he managed to pull me into his arms. "What's wrong? Are you jealous?"

Could you be a bit more subtle, Phum? Asking so directly, how am I supposed to lie?

"No."

"Good, because there's nothing to worry about. Mom just called to invite me to her birthday party."

"And... are you going?"

"No. Too many people, too chaotic. Besides, I'm afraid someone here will get grumpy out of jealousy."

Damn it, Phum. I told you I'm not jealous, just possessive. Damn karma these days, it must have taken the express bus. I think I understand how Phum feels when I'm with Kluen. The fear that your importance might diminish, that he might see someone else as better.

"Nobody's jealous. Just go to sleep. I'm tired." Unable to argue, I closed my eyes to escape. "Ouch, why did you bite my cheek?"

"Are you satisfied now? Anything else?" Short but annoyingly cheeky. "I'm glad you're jealous. Come with me tomorrow to buy a gift for Mom."

Do exes really need to give each other birthday gifts?

"Fine, fine. Let's sleep."

I'm not a generous person, but forbidding it would seem too petty. Giving a gift to an ex shouldn't be a big deal. Realizing this, I was quite surprised at myself. I never thought I had this side. Without love, I wouldn't know I could be so irrational, selfish, and demanding. I want Phum to understand about Kluen, but I don't want him to get close to Mom. I tell Phum to trust me, but I get anxious when he talks to his ex. I'm really a terrible person. Love reveals versions of yourself that you never imagined.
...
..
.

Around 6 PM, Phum took me to the place where he had arranged to meet Mom, even though I didn't want to come. I had decided to trust Phum and let him meet Mom alone, but he dragged me along, causing me to reschedule my meeting with Din to next Sunday. That kid made a big fuss, and instead of just losing a coffee, he demanded I take him to Zen (Japanese restaurant) as compensation. My Nong Code is really bleeding me dry.

"Shall we wait for Mom at the restaurant?"

"Hmm... Are you hungry yet, or do you want to go to Kinokuniya first? You said you wanted to look at books."

"Let's eat first. I want to spend a long time in the bookstore, so we'll go there afterward."

"Okay."

"Then let's eat first. I'm hungry."

"Such a gentleman, Peem."

"Of course. Ouch! That hurts! Why do you like pinching my cheeks so hard? I've told you many times it hurts." My cheeks must have come off in his hand. Phum may be gentle, but when he pinches your cheeks, it feels like the flesh is coming off. "Annoying." Always consistent with his sadism.

We sat waiting for Mom at a Japanese restaurant that Phum said she wanted to eat at. They really know each other well, huh? You really know how to please others. But when I ask him to stop pinching my cheeks, he doesn't listen. Sigh. Different issues, but I just want to complain. Is that okay?

Phum may seem rough and tough on the outside, but he's always a gentleman with female friends, which I know. But Mom isn't just any female friend. And I don't even know how to act when I meet her. Does she know what Phum and I are? And if she knows, will she be upset? Was I the reason they broke up? Thinking about it just makes me sigh.

"What's wrong?" Phum crossed his arms and squinted at me suspiciously. He's my boyfriend, not an interrogator. No need to question me like this.

"What's wrong with what?"

"What's wrong with you? Why are you sighing?"

"Nothing. Just returning air to the world."

"Don't be cheeky, Peem."

"Really, nothing. Where's Mom? Can you call her? I'm hungry."

"She's almost here. Come sit here." Phum patted the chair next to him, but I shook my head, refusing. I didn't want to be teased again.

"Will you come nicely, or do I have to carry you? But I can't guarantee..."

"Fine, fine. No need to threaten." I grumbled but moved to sit next to him, who was grinning so much I wanted to punch him. "With me, you always use force. But with women, you're so polite, kind, and gentle. Like a different person."

"Which women? Speak clearly, Shorty."

"I know, okay?"

Whether I know or not, I just say I know. I'm not usually sulky or sarcastic, but today, I don't know why, just Phum breathing annoys me. Should I just end him? Hmph. I moved to sit next to him but chose to look away. Seeing his face makes me itch. Suddenly, Phum put earphones in my ears. I frowned at him.

"What are you doing?"

"Listening to music."

Are you crazy? The restaurant is already playing music. Why more music? I didn't understand but let Phum put the earphones in. Then I had to purse my lips, feeling both cheesy and amused by Phum at the same time. From now on, whenever I hear the song "No Space Between Us" by Ae Jirakorn, I'll think of Phum and me in this restaurant

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

No Space Between Us (ไม่มีตรงกลาง) by Ae Jirakorn

I will tell you again that I love you
I will tell you that I've found what I'm searching for
The meaning of my life
Is you, not anyone else

I will tell you again if you don't believe me
I will tell you again the truth that
You are number one, above anyone else
And there is no one else but you

*Don't be afraid of those gossip
Don't be afraid that there's someone else in my eyes
Believe in our love, believe in the heart that I give to you, can't you?

**No matter who tries to come between us
Remember that they will never succeed
There will be no space left for anyone else
As long as our hearts are tied together

***No matter who tries to shake our bond
Remember that every time I close my eyes and dream
I only see us loving each other for a long time
Until the day I can finally marry you

Constantly suspecting and doubting each other every day
That only makes our love
Start to fade away
Can you just trust me?

*, **, ***, **
No matter who tries to shake our bond
Remember that every time I close my eyes and dream
I only see us loving each other for a long time
Until the day I can finally marry you

"Do you understand now that I love you? Truly love you and want to marry only you." Phum pulled out the earphones and turned my head to look into my eyes. I wanted to keep a serious face, but holding back a smile made my cheeks hurt, so I ended up smiling.

"Who wants to marry you?" Why did I raise my voice?

"Oh, you didn't know? I was planning to ask my dad to propose after graduation. This year, we'll get engaged first."

[*In some Asian countries, the groom's parents would propose the marriage to the bride's parents.]

"My dowry is expensive."
"For you, I'll pay any price."
"Fifty million." Planning to set myself up nicely, huh? Haha.
"My love for you is worth more than that."

[T/n: Boooooo!!!!!!!]

Should I use chopsticks to pinch Phum's tongue? I pretended to be shocked, covering my mouth with my hand. Phum laughed and patted my back lightly.

"Love can't be eaten, Phum. Don't be naive. I don't need love. I need money. Only money is my one true love."
"Fifty million, right..."

"Phum ka!"

Phum and I snapped out of our little world when a beautiful girl appeared before us. Mom was in a sweet dusty rose-colored dress. Her brown hair was curled, and her clear cheeks had a natural pink hue. It was no wonder everyone turned to look at her.

"Have you been waiting long? Sorry for making you wait. I got the floor wrong."

She apologized with a guilty tone as she sat down across from us, pausing briefly when she met my eyes. Disappointment flashed quickly in her eyes before she smiled warmly at me and greeted me with a wide smile. I felt annoyed at Phum, realizing he hadn't told her I would be coming. If Mom wanted to spend time alone with Phum, how disappointed must she be now?

"Hi, Peem."
"Hi."
"Really sorry for being late."

"It's okay. I just got here too." Phum reassured her, then called a waiter to order food.

"How have you and Phum been? It's been a while. How are you?"

"We're good. You remember me?" I was surprised she remembered me, even though we had only met once during last year's Loy Krathong festival. It made me feel quite impressed.

"Of course, I remember. We met during Loy Krathong last year. I have a good memory, especially for someone as cute as you, Peem."

"Heh." Damn, Phum, why are you laughing?

Her smile was so bright, and her voice so sweet that I couldn't help but smile back. I glanced at Phum, who was also smiling at her. Why does it make my chest tighten just seeing them smile at each other?

[T/N: Now you know how Phum feels when you smile at Kluen.]

"Wow, compliments like that make me shy. Oh, almost forgot, happy birthday in advance."

"Thank you. But if you come to my birthday party, I'd be even happier. Drag Phum along too. He's so stubborn, no matter how much I invite him, he won't come."

"Phum is just playing hard to get. It's better if he doesn't go. Don't care about him."

"But I have to care. It's Phum, after all."

I realized my smile had faded into a dry one, and I felt Phum glance at me. I cleared my throat and forced a bright smile back on my face. Throughout the meal, Mom's sweet voice kept me engaged in conversation as if we had been friends for a long time. She was a great talker, and her big eyes always conveyed sincerity. Phum mostly listened and gave short responses when Mom asked for his opinion.

After we were full of Japanese food, it was time to find a gift for Mom. Phum asked if she wanted anything special, and her answer deflated me and raised questions in my mind.

"Just seeing Phum is special enough. I don't want anything else."

A weak laugh. So that's how it is. I smiled at Mom but had to avoid Phum's gaze. I trust you, Phum, but I can't stop myself from wondering if I'm the one you should love. Did I take Phum from Mom? Did I unknowingly hurt this sweet girl? Meeting her again today made me sure she still had feelings for Phum. The way she looked at him was the same way I did, full of love, but her big eyes also held a hint of sadness.

It was a difficult situation to handle, especially when we were walking around looking for gifts. I didn't know how to walk—should I walk with Phum and leave Mom behind? But walking as a trio didn't feel right either, so I chose to walk behind them. Phum kept looking back at me, and I just smiled to reassure him. How should I deal with these feelings of pity, guilt, fear, and possessiveness? If it were anyone else, I wouldn't be this scared. But this is Mom. She is perfect for Phum in every way.
...
..
.

"Peem, why do you seem so distracted? Are you feeling unwell?" Mom asked while we were in the bookstore. We were in the travel book section, while Phum was still in the English physics books section.

"Hmm? No, I'm okay. Just thinking about something. You're very observant, just like a doctor should be." I teased and started a conversation. "Hey, I've been curious. Can I ask about your name? Why are you called Mom? Are you Mom Rajawongse or Mom Chao* or something?"

[*Royal titles]

She laughed and shook her head vigorously, "No, actually, my name is Kramom (กระหม่อม top of the head). You're not the first to ask, so don't worry. Whenever I meet new people, they all wonder the same thing. I've even complained to my mom about why she didn't give me a more common name. It's made life a bit difficult."

We both laughed.

"Oh, I see. But it's cool, unique. I thought you were royalty or something and was about to use royal language."

"No way. I only have creditors. Beer, Phum's friend, is the royal one. At first, I was nervous around him. I've never met any of the royal members, not knowing how to address him. Should I call him Khun Beer? I was so tense. My friends in the medical faculty all swoon over him."

It's not just the medical faculty. My faculty likes Ai Khun Chai too. He's admired across the university.

"And what about Phum? Doesn't anyone swoon over him?" I said impulsively, regretting it immediately. I wanted to slap myself.

"That one?" Mom's smile and eyes changed instantly when she talked about Phum. Her eyes sparkled, and she looked at him fondly. She teased as Phum approached with a book. "He's a mysterious guy, like a legend that no one sees often. People don't talk about him much because he's elusive. They know he exists but never meet him, like a ghost. Right?"

Phum looked between us, not understanding the question but giving a small smile.

We spent a long time walking around. Mom got a lot of things—books, a bag, clothes, and a designer wallet that Phum bought as a gift. He also volunteered to carry her bags. Then we went to see a superhero movie. I swear, I've never been so distracted watching a movie. Even though Phum and I had kissed in a theater before, it wasn't as nerve-wracking as him holding my hand with Mom sitting on the other side. My panic attack seemed to flare up—heart racing, hands shaking, paranoid that Mom would notice.

By the time we left the theater around 9 PM, I was relieved to finally go home and escape this awkward situation. But then we faced an unexpected problem: a two-seater supercar for three people.

"I can go back by myself. I don't want to trouble you and Phum. You've been keeping me company all day."

"It's no trouble. Phum will take you home."

"But if Phum takes me home, then Peem ..."

Phum and I exchanged glances. He looked troubled, his usually calm face now furrowed with worry. I didn't want to burden my partner with such a small matter.

"Hey, it's fine. I'll go back by myself. Mom, you don't..."

"No," Phum said firmly, then softened his tone to explain. "You stay here. I'll come back to get you."
"I can really go back by myself."

After all, I'm a guy. Traveling alone at night is dangerous, but less so for me than for a woman. Besides, it's not that late yet. Going back now would be better than waiting for Phum to come back. But it seemed Phum didn't think so. One look at him and I knew he wouldn't agree. I didn't want to cause a scene in front of Mom, so I reluctantly nodded.

"Okay, okay. I'll wait around here."

"Are you sure, Phum?" Mom looked visibly worried and apologetic. As for me, I couldn't quite describe how I felt. At first, I thought I could handle them being alone together, but now I realized I was possessive too. But there was nothing I could do.

"We're chill. Don't worry, Mom. It's better if Phum takes you home. It's dangerous to travel alone at night."

"Well... I'll go then, Peem. Thank you so much for today. I had a great time."

"You're welcome. Happy birthday again." I smiled and waved goodbye as Mom got into the car. Phum turned to me.

"I'll be back to get you soon. You'll be okay, right?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine. Drive safely." Phum kept looking at me, reluctant to leave, until I nodded to reassure him. I know you and Mom are just good friends, so... "Come back soon."

Phum said he'd be back in half an hour, but I knew that was impossible given the traffic here. At least an hour, even in a Ferrari. I walked out of the parking lot and sat in front of Siam Center, where a few people were waiting for buses. I didn't want to go inside since the mall would close soon, and I wanted to be easy to find if Phum came back quickly. I didn't want him to have to wait for me. I could wait.

"Damn it, my phone."

I cursed under my breath, realizing my beloved BB was in the bag of books Phum was carrying. It was probably lying in the car's air conditioning by now. Damn it. And worse, my wallet was with it too. I only had ten baht on me, left over from a movie date with Phum when I exchanged coins to play games. The laundry lady had kindly left it in my pocket. I felt like crying.

I sat there, bored and restless, watching everything around me, hoping Phum would find me. I watched people passing by, cars rushing around, a large group of teenagers walking by, their lively chatter and laughter reminding me of the times I used to hang out here with friends after school. A young mother held her child's hand, the little one more concerned with the ice cream in their hand, chocolate smeared adorably on their small lips. Couples walked by, some stopping to take pictures with the beautiful lights.

I looked ahead at the people crowding onto a hot bus, packed so tightly they seemed to merge into one. Those sitting by the windows had various expressions—some looked stressed, some exhausted and hopeless, some dozing off. I imagined what they had gone through today, guessing their jobs, their wages, whether they had eaten all their meals, and what time they would get home in this traffic. Just a few meters away, inside the mall behind me, another group of people lived as if in a different world, enjoying the cool air conditioning, eating delicious meals that might cost more than a day's wages for those on the bus, traveling by convenient trains or private cars.

The question that always arises in my mind is, why are people so different? Why are some born into hardship while others have comfortable lives? Will there ever be a day when everyone has an equally good life? How should I deal with this feeling of melancholy? When will I stop being so empathetic? When will the pain of seeing others' hardships go away? I've never found an answer. But one thing I can do and have always done is use art as a tool to express the bitterness in my heart. My thoughts and feelings become tangible, visible, and can heal me. It's a peculiar gift of those who call themselves artists, though sometimes I'm not sure if it's a blessing or a curse.

The mall closed.

The sky darkened, bringing rain. I looked up and gave myself a sad smile, wishing I had paper and a pencil to jot down my thoughts. I checked my watch—half an hour had passed, and Phum still hadn't returned. I thought back to a previous time when I was still Phum's lackey, waiting for him like this. Different time, different place, but it felt like déjà vu. We weren't a couple then, and I didn't love him yet. That day, I waited for Phum until the mall closed, for four hours, but he never came. I hoped this time wouldn't be the same. I watched the mall employees, one by one, board the buses, their tired bodies slowly departing. I stood up to stretch. The streets were quieter now, people hurried their pace as the cool breeze turned into a strong wind. I started to worry—where would I take shelter if it rained? For a moment, I thought about going home but remembered I only had ten baht. A regular bus fare was eight baht, or I could wait for a free bus. But what if Phum came back and couldn't find me?
He had to find me. We had to meet.

An hour passed. I hated the expensive red Ferrari that could only seat two. I hated myself for forgetting my phone in the car. I hated having only ten baht. But strangely, I didn't feel any anger towards Phum. Just a heavy feeling in my heart. It wasn't jealousy. If I had to dissect it, it was a mix of insecurity and feeling slighted. Mom was beautiful, kind, smart, and a woman. In every way, she was better suited for Phum than I was. Any man would be lucky to have her as a girlfriend.

Unlike an ordinary guy like me, as different as night and day.

[[T/n: Nooo, you're extraordinary. Even the sun and the moon fight for you.]

The wind picked up, and I was left sitting there alone. The first raindrop hit my skin before the sky opened up, pouring down like a broken dam. I moved to the bus stop, poorly designed to shield from the rain. The rain started to blow in, soaking my sleeves and shoes. I shifted to the end of the bench, with nowhere else to go. Normally, I liked the rain, having grown up in the countryside where the rainy season was refreshing and vibrant. The smell of the earth after rain, the green, lively trees and grass, playing in the rain with neighborhood friends. But rain in Bangkok wasn't like that. Now, the cold mist from the wind made me shiver. Eventually, I was soaked.

And Phum still hadn't returned. It's okay, maybe Mom's house was far. I consoled myself. Thunder roared as if it came from the roof. The storm showed no sign of stopping, only intensifying. Over an hour had passed.

But Phum still hadn't returned. It's okay, maybe there was traffic. I consoled myself again. Despite being soaked, the cold mist making me shiver, the water running down my cheeks was warm. And even as the rain poured down crazily, I walked home in the rain like a fool.

[T/n: Phum, you're deducted 1 billion points. Wait, should we fine him $2.5 decillion. I even don't know how many zeros in a decillion.]

"Oh my, no wonder there's a storm. My nephew is home." Aunt Pui exclaimed cheerfully as I walked past the living room where she was working and watching a drama. I wasn't prepared to see her, and I must have looked a mess, so I tried to act cheerful to cover it up. "Why are you soaked like a drowned rat? Don't tell me you walked in the rain." Aunt Pui scolded, rushing over to check on me.

"It was late, and I couldn't find a motorbike taxi after getting off the bus, so I walked home."

"Oh my goodness, why didn't you call me to pick you up?"

"My battery died. But it's okay, I wanted to play in the rain anyway. Ouch!" She smacked my arm, making me avert my eyes.

"Is this a joke to you, Peem? Walking in the rain at night like that, what if you got mugged? This isn't Chiang Mai. Bangkok rain is filthy. Go shower and change now. Oh, I'm going to faint. Having just one son is driving me crazy. You'll catch a cold, just watch. I'm so tired of you artist types. Go shower, go! I'll get you some medicine for cold..."

Aunt Pui kept scolding but still left her favorite drama to find medicine for her useless nephew. I watched her serious face as she rummaged through the medicine cabinet, and I had to look up at the ceiling, blinking rapidly to hold back the lump in my throat.

"Thank you, Auntie." I whispered through trembling lips.

"Eek! Peem, don't hug me! Gross, you're getting me all wet." I hugged her, but she squirmed away, protesting loudly.

"Just a hug! I haven't seen you in days. I missed you." I buried my face in her shoulder.

"You're acting strange. Is something wrong, Peem?" She patted my wet head.

"I'm out of money. Can I have some?"

She smacked me again. "Where's your handsome prince? Phum usually brings you home."

"I'd like to know that too. He's at a friend's birthday party. What is this? You care more about him than your own nephew. I'm sulking. I'm going to bed."

"Sulk all you want. Go shower. I'll bring up some medicine and milk."

"Okay."

I went into my room, which I hadn't been in for a while. The light from outside was enough to see by, so I didn't turn on the light. I grabbed a towel and headed to the bathroom. Achoo! There it was, the first sign of a cold. I showered and washed my hair, sneezing and feeling a headache coming on. I quickly dried my hair and almost crawled into bed as the migraine hit hard. I hate migraines.

"Peem, are you asleep?"

"Not yet." I turned and squinted at Aunt Pui, who was sitting by the bed with a glass of milk. She reached out to feel my forehead.

"You're warm. See what happens when you play in the rain? Drink this milk and take your medicine." She waited until I finished, then placed a damp cloth on my forehead. "Do you want me to stay with you in case your fever gets worse?"

"Oh, Auntie, I'm not a three-year-old. It's just a cold. I'll be fine."

"Alright, Mr. Tough Guy. If you need anything, just break a glass, and I'll come running." She laughed, and I coughed and laughed at her method.

"Got it. You can count on me to break things." She smiled and patted my head gently, looking at me with the understanding eyes of an adult who sees through a child's thoughts.

"Peem, did you have a fight with Phum?"

I didn't know what expression I had on my face, but Aunt Pui smiled knowingly. I had never told her directly about my relationship with Phum, but it seemed she knew anyway, even if she never asked outright. I nodded in acknowledgment.

"Love is hard to handle, especially your first relationship. Everything is new. I went through it too."

"..."

"But you know, it's really hard to find the right person. Don't you think, Peem? Falling in love is hard, but staying in love is even harder. When problems arise, when you fight, talking things out is the best solution if you still want to be together. The important thing is not to forget the first day you fell in love. What were you like? What was he like? How happy were you? Everything was good and beautiful that day, right? Everything was perfect and beautiful, right? You couldn't even imagine fighting. But now, here you are. But Peem, don't forget that feeling. Don't forget that aloe vera plant that is still as lovely as the first day you showed it to me."

I glanced at the aloe vera plant on the bedside table. Yes, it was still as lovely as ever, though it had grown bigger. Everything changes, but no matter how it changes, it's still an aloe vera plant. Just like my love for Phum. It might not be as smooth as it was at the beginning, but it's still love. We've grown over time, and life's variables and conditions change daily, but that doesn't mean we'll change our hearts.

I still remember how we loved each other at the start. "Thank you, Auntie." Thank you for reminding me.

"Think carefully about the things that need thinking, and let your feelings guide you where they should. And do you realize how lucky you are to have such a beautiful and smart aunt like me?"

Aunt Pui lifted her chin, ruffled my hair again, and walked out of the room. I chuckled, feeling lighter despite the pain in my eyes. I propped myself up against the headboard and reached for the aloe vera plant Phum had given me on Valentine's Day.

"Take good care of our love plant." he had said.
"Ugh, your love plant looks so ugly, not cute at all." I had teased, poking its spiky tip.

Aunt Pui said that when our love starts to feel strained, we should remember the first day we fell in love. That's right. The first day I became Phum's boyfriend, I was so happy. Just thinking about him riding a bike with me on the back makes me smile. Who else asks someone to be their boyfriend while riding a bike?

"Heh heh."

I didn't actually think Phum would go back to dating Mom, but I felt insecure. Would he be happier with a good woman than with me? Would it be different? But I forgot that Phum's happiness comes from loving me. It was like my senses returned. So let me say this: even if there were a million Moms, it wouldn't matter. I won't waver anymore. Mom can only look because no one will take Phum from me. Muahaha.

[T/n: 😮 He's recovering really fast.]

But now, my body can't take it anymore. I need to lie down. Just before I drifted into sleep, I remembered I forgot to call Phum to tell him I got home safely. But my body wouldn't let me get up to find the house phone downstairs.
...
..
.

I don't know how long I slept, but I kept waking up because of the intense headache. It felt like the world was tilting and swaying as if I were on a boat. One moment I was hot, the next cold. My head, eyes, and throat hurt. Swallowing felt like pouring hot sand down my throat. Don't die, Peem. I dragged myself to wet a towel and placed it on my forehead again. I lost count of how many times I drifted in and out of sleep. Then I heard someone enter the room. Maybe it was Aunt Pui checking on me. I wasn't sure if it was real or if I was delirious from the fever, but I called out.

"Auntie, do you have more medicine? My head hurts."

Aunt Pui didn't answer. Maybe I was hallucinating. After a while, someone hugged me tightly, almost suffocating me. Was it a ghost? I squinted to see who it was. I wasn't sure if I was dreaming, but the hug felt familiar and warm, making me feel safe. The gentle touch on my temple eased my doubts.

"I found you. I finally found you," a soft whisper came with a face nuzzling into my neck.
"Phum? Is that you?"
"Yes."
"You're here?"
"Yeah."

I didn't know what to say in a moment like this. I fought to stay awake, wanting to be with Phum a little longer.

"I'm sorry I came back without calling. I got caught in the rain, took some medicine, and fell asleep." My voice was hoarse and muffled, but Phum hugged me tighter, burying his face in my neck and... crying. Phum was crying. There was no sobbing sound, but the warmth of his tears on my neck was proof enough.

"Phum, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" My heart sank, confused about what had happened. "Phum, what happened? Who did this to you?" But I got no answer. Phum just held me and cried quietly for a long time.

"Sorry."

We both said it at the same time, like a stone lodged in my throat, making my chest ache. I didn't know what Phum was apologizing for, but I wanted to apologize for doubting his love, for making him worry, for overthinking, for being foolish. In the nearly year-long relationship we've had, we'd never faced something like this. The most we'd dealt with was being apart. For us, this was the first real test of our love.

"I don't know if I can forgive myself for putting you through this. I'm sorry, Peem. I'm so sorry." It seemed I was the one who made Phum cry.

"It's okay, Phum. It's really okay. Don't blame yourself."

"I was scared you'd disappear. When I couldn't find you, I was terrified, Peem. I was so scared..."

"It's okay now. It's okay." I hugged and patted Phum's back. He held me tighter, his breathing irregular like someone sobbing. I rocked him gently, like comforting a frightened child.

"Mom asked to get back together with me, but I told her I already have a faen." Phum shook his head, wiping his tears on my shoulder.

"And how did she take it?"

"I felt guilty, but it's not my job to manage other people's feelings." It was a harsh truth. Phum was brutally honest with his feelings, which was both admirable and a bit scary. "It's your feelings that I care about."

"Thank you. I trust you, Phum. I'm sorry for overthinking, but I know now that you can't love anyone but me. Right?"

"Nothing is truer than that, Peem."

"Right."

He looked into my eyes before brushing his sharp nose against mine, then lay down beside me, holding me close. I always felt grateful to have met Phum. Whether it was the universe's energy or something else that brought us together and made us fall in love, I was thankful. Even though our beginning wasn't beautiful—in fact, it was pretty awful—today, I was happy to have Phum in my life. I loved the feeling of being loved, of us holding each other and falling asleep in each other's arms every night.

"I love you na."
"Love you too."

End of Chapter 46>>>>>>>>>>