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"Damn, what's going on? Q loves Toey, and Toey loves Q. Why don't they just get together? Do I need to light incense and candles and perform a ceremony to bind their souls together? Damn, I'm frustrated."

"Yeah, calm down, Mick. Why are you getting so worked up?"

"Because I'm annoyed, man. I don't get it."

The lakorn The Crown Of Orange Flowers* was just gonna start. Tan, Mick and I were sitting together in the living room at Chan's house. Toey is being forced by Fang to eat in the kitchen, with Chan helping out. Meanwhile, Pan is sitting in a corner mumbling to himself. Beer, Phum, and Matt are checking on Q, making the best use of our limited personnel.

[*มงกุฎดอกส้ม is the Thai adaption of Raise The Red Lantern.]

'I must drink more to sob up, I must drink more to sob up.' Mick and I frowned at Tan's iPhone. The ringtone made me lose faith in iPhones altogether.

"Hello, what's up, Beer? ... Yeah, my wife is feeding him. It's good that school's out; otherwise, we wouldn't be able to study. How's our friend doing? ... Yeah, still alive, that's good... Okay, take care of him... What? Oh, got it... Peem, Phum sends his regards, haha."

I heard Phum's voice complaining, followed by Beer and Matt's laughter. They know that Phum and I are playing the game sulking and reconciling, haha. This evening, I have to face Phum's punishment. Just thinking about it gives me chills.

This morning, I called Phum, planning to speak nicely to cheer him up. I asked if he wanted anything to eat or if he wanted to go anywhere. Do you know what he replied? "Go die!" I almost couldn't find a knife or rope fast enough. How can someone hold a grudge so deeply?

I raised my middle finger at Tan and walked to the kitchen to see the others. Chan was stuffing spaghetti into Toey's mouth.

"I beg you, Nong Toey, just eat already. I'm exhausted. How stubborn can you be?" Chan sat down, bowing to Toey, who just sat there with his hands tightly covering his mouth. Toey is a troublemaker, foul-mouthed but also very stubborn.

"If he doesn't eat, just leave him, Chan. If he dies, Q wouldn't care." Fang, who was standing and stirring something, scolded. Toey glared at him but quickly looked away. That's Fang for you; if he throws a pan at your head, you're in trouble.

"Can you even cook, Fang?" I walked over to check the pan. Fang was making spaghetti sauce with minced pork and fresh tomatoes.

"A dog likes to eat, so I have to cook. Looks like he was born in Poipet but has a fancy taste for spaghetti." Fang grumbled. Tan must have come into the kitchen earlier to order Khao Fang to make spaghetti.

[*Poipet is a town on the Thai-Cambodian border. The town has a number of casinos, including being the largest and closest casino to Thailand. The main customers are Thai tourists.]

If Tan's face is Poipet, then mine is Phnom Penh. Fang grumbled as usual but was focused on cooking.
"Make me some basil chicken stir-fry with a fried egg," I said with a big smile, nudging Fang's arm. He turned to me with a look like Lord Voldemort. Can you picture it?

"I can only make this dish. If you want to eat, eat. If not, go buy somtam (papaya salad with fermented crab) at the end of the alley." Fang said.

[T/N: So Fang doesn't cook. He only learned to cook one dish. And Peem, if you want to eat something, ask Fang's little brother to make it for you 😏]

Damn Fang, you pointed your spatula dangerously close to my eyebrow.

"Don't bother asking him, Peem. He only makes Tan's favorite to tie his husband's heart." Someone else chimed in.

"Even if I don't tie him, your friend won't go anywhere. Hey, Toey, are you going to get full just by staring at me? If you want Q, eat up so your brain can work and figure out how to get him. And you, are you going to stand there shorty and be my brother's weak point forever? Go get me a plate!"

"Uh, okay, Fang. Even a mother dog isn't as fierce as you." I said, walking to get a plate, bewildered by the scolding. Every time I see the dog in Fang's mouth, the dog in my mouth always stops working. Toey quickly shoveled food into his mouth, probably to gather strength to conquer Q."

...

..

.

"It's good that Q knows this. What do you think, Toey?" After Pan went to meditate, he came back with another plan. You haven't learned your lesson yet, have you?

We all looked at Toey, waiting to see his reaction. He had been very quiet since the morning, barely saying a word. His eyes looked a bit crazy, like someone with evil thoughts in his head. Yeah, something like that.

"Toey is going to attack Q."

"What!!!"

We all shouted, making Chan's housekeeper run in to ask what was wrong. Haha, nothing, just surprised that our little brother has lost his mind.

"Cough, cough, Fang, can I have some water?" Tan choked, and Mick was left with a fork hanging out of his mouth.

"Hia Peem, you said that P'Q has feelings for Toey, right?" He asked me, but his eyes were fixed on the TV screen that wasn't even on, not blinking at all.

"Uh, yeah. He said he feels comfortable when he's around you."

"Heh, good," the corners of his mouth turning up, just like Fang often does, and Fang was doing it too. We secretly swallowed our saliva nervously. Fang, did you secretly teach him something?

"So, what are you going to do next?" Even Chan was at a loss for words.

"I've thought it through. I'm not going to let P'Q go again. Let's see if I can't even get just one man."

"Toey!!!"

"Toey, did you eat something wrong? Chan, what did you give my brother?" Tan turned to ask.

"Nothing, man. I'm just as shocked."

"Very good, Toey, my dear brother. We'll continue with the original plan. Knowing that Q has feelings for you makes it even more fun. He'll definitely be jealous. Peem, are you sure you didn't accidentally tell Q that Chan is Toey's fake boyfriend?" 

"Yeah, I only told him what I told you guys."

"Alright, the next plan is to make Q realize his own feelings." Pan clasped his hands on his lap, trying to look serious, but Fang and I couldn't help but laugh. It was just too funny.

"I think he already knows, just doesn't dare to admit it." Tan said.

"Exactly. We need to push him a bit. It might seem like we're rushing Q, but it's for his long-term happiness. Don't worry."

It's worrisome because you're the one making the plan, Pan. I don't know why I keep following his crazy ideas.

"I think we should give Q a bit more time. He's probably confused. Imagine finding out that your first love is the person who annoys you every day. What would you do, even if you still care about them, right, Toey?" From what I saw of Q last night, he seemed really pitiful.

"No," Toey answered loudly and clearly. If it were on a speaker, it would be perfect. Haha.

"Oh, why?"

"I've been hurt for many years. Since P'Q loves me too, why wait? It's a waste of time."

"Wowwww, that's strong, kid. What's possessing you?" Mick went over to touch Toey's arm, as if he were some rare, amazing creature of the era.

"Beyond the sky there's always a universe*. I thought Fang was scary, but after seeing Toey, you're such a good guy, Fang." Pan said.

[*เหนือฟ้ายังมีฟ้า เหนือคนยังมียอดคน originated from China proverb 人外有人，天外有天, meaning no matter how capable you are, there are still more extraordinary people out in the world.]

You really don't fear for your life, do you, Pan? I was still tense from the two hits I took in the kitchen.

We all looked at each other and gave Toey awkward smiles. Only Fang smirked. I think Fang is the one behind Toey's transformation, but I don't understand how Toey could change so much overnight. Hehe, good luck, Q.

"If talking nicely doesn't work, P'Q will soon find out what the real deal is."

Toey, you've changed.

...

..

.

"I'm going to a camp, not a vacation. It's not fun, really."

"I'm going with you. I'm going. I'm going!" Phum threw himself on the sofa, flailing around. He looked up at me with a pout. Oh, I wish I had a camera to record this.

"I'm sorry I forgot to tell you, but you shouldn't be this angry. It's not a big deal, isn't it?"

"What?" Phum asked quietly, still with cold face.

"Uh, I mean it shouldn't be a problem."

"Then it means that our big issues are probably not the same. So you don't even know what I'm dissatisfied with. Do you think I'm angry about you going to camp?"

This time I felt quiet.

"You probably think you just forgot to tell me and it's just a small thing. But you forget that we're together almost all the time. People never forget something important if they pay enough attention."

I opened my mouth and closed it again. Once I understood what Phum was upset about, I tried to explain but couldn't find the words. Because I hadn't thought about anything that deeply before. I walked over to sit down next to Phum and hugged him.

"Sorry for making you feel hurt. Next time, I'll pay more attention to you. Now stop being irritated."

I heard Phum exhaling loudly and began to feel relieved. Phum is easily angered but he also heals quickly. I could handle this.

"I won't get upset, but I have to go with you."

"What!!!"

"I will go to the camp too."

"Is this a joke?"

"Do I ever joke?"

I looked at the person in front of me. I blinked in confusion for a moment before letting out a loud gasp. "Are you crazy? You can't go."

"I'll go with you." Phum removed his arms from around me and crossed them over his chest with a determined expression.

"Phum, please be reasonable."

"No, I don't know, I don't want to, I'm not listening." He crossed his arms and looked at me from the corner of his eyes.

I moved closer and patted his head, like stroking a dog, "I'm going to a camp. I'll be back in three days. It's not that I don't want you to go, but it's a faculty event, outsiders can't join. Understand?"

I used all the psychology techniques I learned, from persuasion techniques, manipulation, to psychology for special children. Hey, I have used them all. I'm going to go crazy.

"You're going to see your fling, aren't you? You're going to leave me," he said, still crossing his arms and pouting. If he were a child or a cute girl, it might be adorable, but Phum is as big as a buffalo. Not cute at all, but I can't kick him. He probably just wants to be with me. Actually, I was afraid Phum would kick me back.

"What fling? It's just friends, all men."

"Like the person you're dating now is a girl."

"I told you, we're just friends."

"Every 10 minutes," he said, demanding.

"Huh? What 10 minutes?"

"I'm going to call you every 10 minutes."

Oh my god! Is your dad the owner of the Telephone Organization of Thailand?

"10 minutes? You won't let me pee or poop, will you, darling? Are you that free to call me every ten minutes? You won't let me do anything at all? Besides, you don't have the right to control me. I'm your boyfriend, not your slave."

I won't be able to do anything because I'll be busy answering Phum's calls. Should I tie the phone to my ear, Phum?

"Then 15."

"How about 20?" I negotiated.

"17," he insisted, not backing down.

"19, I didn't get anything out of this."

"Then tonight, no sleep."

"Deal."

In the end, the story of sulking and making up ended in bed. I, little Peem, had to use my body to solve the problem. Both sides were very satisfied.

Kids, remember that every problem has a solution. Whether it's a big or small solution, was something I lost count of.

Let's just say I killed millions of my own children. Sorry, kids, for not giving you a chance to see the world. Haha.

I was so exhausted I couldn't even get up to eat. And that's how this story ends.

End of Chapter 33 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>