Proofreader: SMV2454

These days, it feels like each one of us have been cut off from the outside world, just cramming for exams. I have two more subjects to go before I'm done. Some faculties have already finished their exams, while others, like engineering and medical students, will finish after us. So, no one was in touch with anyone.

As for Phum, I talked to him for about ten minutes a day, and the rest was just texting. Anyone who thinks a handsome guy like him can't be annoying is wrong. Phum is the king of it.

"Studying late? Be careful your legs will get shorter ná, hahaha!"

"Get some rest, Shorty. I don't want a wife like Lin Hui^^"

[*Lin Hui was the female giant panda on long-term loan from China to Chiang Mai Zoo in Chiang Mai, Thailand.]

"I miss you so much, my pocket boyfriend."

"You idiot Phum," I cursed the sender of the silly messages. He told me not to smile, but I couldn't help it. I decided whether to text back or call to scold him. Calling him would be better. I closed my Eastern Art History book after finishing my second review and called Phum.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

Love Ya (รักนะคะ) by Bie Sukrit

"I love you, my dear.
No matter the day, I love only you.
And I want to tell you that I love you the most.
My heart is set on you.
I love you, my dear..."

Oh, the ringing tone waiting for Phum's call, I'm melting, is it good? Yesterdayay to it was still 'Shaved Ice' (หวานเย็น). Today, it's "Love Ya" by P'Bie.

[T/N: Yes, we're 🫠]

(Yes, Shorty) He spoke politely, but his tone was very annoying.

"Nice song." I lay down on the bed and smiled at the ceiling. I could faintly hear the laughter of the person on the other end of the line.

(It's for my boyfriend. I set it for a special number, just one special person.) He must be stressed about the exams, so his brain is acting weird.

"Really? You must love your boyfriend very much."

(Yeah, so much. Even though my boyfriend is stupid, and short. Hahaha.)

"You buffalo, you're insulting me."

(I'm insulting my boyfriend, not you. Why are you getting worked up?) Phum's laughter continued.

"Phum, you jerk. Yeah, I'm not good. Ok, fine." I pretended to scold him and laughed, my hand accidentally gripping the stupid doll (the buffalo doll that Phum won for me. Its name is Stupid. I named it myself. Phum said this name reflects my personality well. Heh heh.) I bought him one too, but in brown, named Fool. Not much different. Haha.

(Isn't it true? You're not my boyfriend, but my wife. Has my wife finished studying?)

"Damn, at my level I don't need to study. I can wing it."

(Really?)

"Yeah. Have you finished studying? Am I disturbing you?"

(Finished. I was just thinking about you.)

"You must have studied too much and are now in a daze, right?"

(In a daze from love.)

"Haha, you're so bold, Phum. You're really something. I think you're seriously ill."

(Huh, just realizing it now? Do you have an exam in the morning or afternoon tomorrow? Should I pick you up?)

"Morning exam. No need to come because Q will pick me up."

(Why does Q have to pick you up? Don't you want to see me, Shorty?)

"I don't want to see you. Your face is boring. I'm tired of it." If we were close, I might get kicked by him. Haha.

(Yes, my face is boring. You Shorty have a trendy face. Very handsome, even more handsome.)

"Haha, you don't have to tell the truth, Phum. I know I'm handsome."

(If I feel so annoyed with my own boyfriend that I want to stomp him, would I be sinful, Peem?) The old nature started to show. Sweetness doesn't last long. The harshness and wickedness return. But I hoped he was joking because I was a bit scared. Haha.

We talked a bit more and then hung up. I washed my face, brushed my teeth, and went to bed. Before sleeping, I received the last message of the night.

"Good night, my Shorty."

I smiled at the phone as if it were the face of the person who sent the message. Then I replied,

"Good night to you too, my Ai Hia 😛. Haha."

I stared at my phone until the screen showed that the message was delivered. I placed the phone next to the lamp, turned off the light, and lay down. Before I could close my eyes, the notification sound of a new message rang loudly. I quickly grabbed it with a smile, thinking Phum must have sent a reply.

But it wasn't Phum. It was someone else.

"Sleep well. Good luck with your exam tomorrow..."

Ai Kluen

...

..

.

"Hey, does my face look like Justin Bieber or something? Why do you keep staring?" Q complained because ever since the exam ended, I had been staring at him. It wasn't just me, though. Phum, Tan, Fang, and Mick were also staring. As for the rest, they had an afternoon exam and hadn't left the exam room yet.

Others were just staring normally, but Mick leaned in so close that he almost ate Q's eyebrow. Just because Pan wasn't here didn't mean the weirdos were gone. Mick wasn't any less weird.

"You... you're pretty handsome," I complimented Q absentmindedly. He immediately frowned at me.

"Shit, Peem, you're giving me goosebumps. Phum, take your kid away from me. Ewww 🤮."

Am I really that disgusting, Q? I nudged Tan under the table with my foot, signaling him to proceed with the plan before Mick ruined everything.

"Ai Q, who gave you your name?" It was probably too late. "I think your real name should be Ikkyū. Hey everyone, from now on, let's call Ai Q 'Ikkyū', okay?"

[*Ikkyū Sōjun (一休宗純) was an eccentric, iconoclastic Japanese Zen Buddhist monk and poet.]

Phum dragged Mik back to sit next to him, probably stepping on his foot, judging by Mik's pained expression.

"Does my face look like a monk's or something? My name is Ai Q, not Ikkyū."

"Don't mind Mick, Q. Do you still go to P'Oh's shop?" Tan asked directly. Our plan was to first check if Q's feelings were still the same, meaning if he still had feelings for his Milkshake. That way, we could proceed accordingly. And it seemed to be working.

"Why do you ask?" He snapped back at Tan immediately. For a split second, Q's eyes flickered and seemed to avoid eye contact.

"Just asking. How's P'Oh doing?"

"He's fine."

"Do you still go there often?"

"If you have something to say, just say it, Tan," Q started to get annoyed, as if he didn't want to talk anymore.

"Nothing, just asking. Reminds me of the old days when you used to go there often. I don't know what's so special about it." Tan must have been hanging out with Fang too much, absorbing his intimidating aura. His gaze and words seemed cunning.

Q didn't respond. He twirled the pen in his hand. When he couldn't solve a problem or was under pressure, Q would usually stay silent and unresponsive. Tan and I exchanged glances, knowing this well.

But before we could worm it out of Q, Pan's nerve-wracking voice interrupted. Hmph, we were just getting to the good part, and Pan ruined it all.

"Guys, I tapir (sŏm sèt)!" Pan shouted from afar. What the hell with tapir, Pan? Tapir is an endangered protected animal.

"Finished the exam (sòp sèt), Pan." I told him as he nearly pushed me off the bench. Luckily, Phum grabbed my arm in time.

"Yeah, yeah, it's the same thing. Hey, Q, I have something for you, a cold milkshake. For the rest of you, I got Veta Prune* extract from real bird's nests."

"Veta my ass. Extracted from real bird's nests???"

[*a food supplements brand]

"Hehe, what were you guys talking about? It looks fun. Tell me, tell me!"

Pan, which eyelash did you look through to think this atmosphere is fun?

"We were talking about what would happen if I kicked your mouth, right, Tan?" Fang said, resting his chin on Tan's shoulder, looking smug. Phum just shook his head at his brother's mischief.

"If you kick my mouth, it would hurt."

"Yeah, if you don't want to get hurt, shut up."

"Tan, if your wife gives birth, can I have two of them to guard my house? They're really fierce."

"Haha," we all laughed at Fang, who got tricked by Pan into being called a dog. Tan seemed very satisfied, clapping his hands and the table exaggeratedly, so Fang slapped him back. Yeah, they really love each other with their fists.

"Why are you staring at the glass, Q? Drink it, drink it," Pan urged.

"What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why are you acting so weird?"

"Weird, how? What's weird? I don't see anything weird, right, Phum?"

"Yeah," Good, you just went along with him, na Phum.

"Why did you suddenly buy me... a milkshake?"

"Oh, I remembered you used to like it. I happened to be walking by and saw it looked good, so I bought it for you. I mean well, Q. Drinking milk makes you smart. Do you want to have a soft brain like Peem?"

"Fuck Pan, what does this have to do with me?"

That was it. Q stopped being suspicious, grabbed the milkshake, and drank it, giving me a mischievous smile. So I had to be the bait, huh? The guy next to me laughed along.

"What are you laughing at, Phum? Did your father die or something, you idiot?"

"Hey, his father is my father too, Peem. Oh, and he's also your father-in-law, haha." Fang, you're beyond words.

"And my father-in-law too, right, Fang?"

"If you don't butt into something, no one would know you're a scoundrel, Tan."

We were shouting and splashing saliva at each other, having a blast, with no one really listening, just everyone wanting to talk. Then Phum's phone rang, interrupting us. He picked it up and looked at it.

"It's Beer," he said. We all nodded, and he answered his best friend's call.

"Yeah... I'm at my faculty. Are you coming or going home?...Uh-huh... What about Chan?.. Okay, I'll call him." After finishing the call with Beer, Phum turned to stare at me. Lately, I've started to understand his eye language more. It's like we don't need to talk; just a look is enough. Hehe. Most of the time, Phum's eyes are programmed with one command.

Like right now, his eyes were telling me, "I'm going home, and you have to come with me." That's what it's like having a handsome, quiet, introverted boyfriend who's unapproachable. So, Peem has to have a lot of special skills. If I were to practice enough, I might even jump through hoops or sniff out drugs, who knows.

"Ai Fangggg!!! Oh, you guys, A' Peem, A'Q, A' Tan, A' Panpan, what are you doing here?" My beautiful but sharp-tongued friend stood at the head of the table, looking confused.

"Oh, Fai, you know them?" Mick asked, puzzled.

"Yeah, how do you know Fang's group?" Q was also confused.

"Huh, that's nothing. Fai is my ex," Fang said.

"Shit Fang! You're a so foul mouthed. I'm your brother's ex, right, Phum ká?" Fai smiled sweetly and slid into the seat next to Phum. It's a small world that Fai knows both of our groups, but now we're all one group.

[T/N: Oh girl, you don't know what you're saying.]

"Ugh, 🤮. Look at this, guys. Hearing Fai speak so politely gives me goosebumps," Q said, extending his arms for us to see.

"Why are you vomiting? Someone's foot is stuck in your throat? And you too, Tan, don't be too handsome, or I won't be able to resist, haha."

So it turns out that Fai and Fang actually dated a long time ago, but because of their legendary sharp tongues, they ended up becoming best friends. I just found out about this. Usually, people go from friends to lovers, but they went from lovers to friends. It's quite surprising that Fai, the queen of sharp tongues, and Fang, the king of mischief, used to date. How did they even flirt? Tan probably knew about it before because he didn't seem surprised or curious.

[T/N: I wonder if she knows about Tan&Fang.]

"And where's my beloved husband?" Fai moved to sit next to Mick, grabbing Q's milkshake and slurping it loudly. The image of the former Art Star was completely gone.

"Your husband? Who?"

"P'Chan and P'Beer, aren't they with you guys?"

[T/N: Why Phi Chan and Phi Beer but the rest is "Ai"??? 🤣🤣🤣]

"So, is it Chan or Beer?" Pan asked, but he didn't wait for an answer as he was busy helping Mick take care of a Tamagotchi. Wow, it's the 21st century, and there are still Tamagotchis around?

[*Tamagotchi ( たまごっち, "Egg Watch") is a handheld digital pets that was created in Japan.]

"Nong Fai wants both. Actually, I want to take all of you. You guys really know how to pick friends. I thought it was a gathering of handsome guys."

[T/N: Me too, me too 😍]

"You said it just the way I like it."

"If you like it, you can call for our services, Khun Tan."

"Cleaning toilets, mopping floors, something like that, Fai?"

Haha, Fai pouted, but we all laughed with satisfaction. It's rare to see Fai at a loss for words, so we had to take the opportunity to tease her. Such gentlemen, ganging up on a girl, haha.

"Hmph," Fang grunted. If Fai had noticed, she would have seen Tan's arm around Fang's waist.

"So, what are you doing around here?"

"My brother is invigilating an exam, so I'm waiting for him." Fai's brother is a professor in the engineering faculty. "Hey, Peem, about the camp, you're going, right?"

"Yeah, I'm going. Q and Toey are going too."

"What camp, Peem?" The cold voice from the person sitting next to me. Hell has come to visit me. I forgot to tell Phum that I was going to the camp. His face was now far beyond just a frown; it was downright angry.

"Uh, the art camp. I was going to tell you, but I've been busy. Uh, I mean, I forgot."

"Do you want to go, Phum?" Fai leaned in, eyes wide, completely unaware of the situation. But Phum didn't care; he just kept staring at me without blinking. Don't eat me alive, Phum. "Hmph, sorry, darling, but this time it's only for architecture and fine arts students. No one else is allowed. Hey, Fang, aren't you going?"

"No, I'm scared of you."

"What the hell are you scared of? This is what I'm going to this camp for. Just you wait, I'm going to this camp to find an architect boyfriend. When I come back, I'll have a bunch of guys."

That's too scary, my friend. I get that you went to an all-girls school, but please do something that matches your appearance, Fai.

"Q, Peem, after the exam tomorrow, we'll meet at the club room. P'Jet will announce the schedule. The architecture guys will be there. They're my type."

"Take it easy, Fai. The guys in my faculty are picky too. Who would want someone like you? Hey, Peem, would you take someone like Fai?" You wouldn't believe these two used to date, considering how they bicker.

"For free? Let me think about it."

"You jerks, the reason I don't have a boyfriend is because I have standards (mâat-dtrà-tăan)."

"What's the base of your standards, database (tăan kôr moon) or pagoda base (tăan jay-dee)? Haha," Q laughed loudly and pushed Fai's head again.

"Be careful, Fai. If you're too picky, you'll die single. There are fewer men these days," Mick said while his eyes were on the Tamagotchi in Pan's hand.

"Hmph, I'm not worried about there being fewer men, Mick. But it's a problem when they eat (date) each other," she said, looking at Fang with a smile. I felt hot and cold at the same time. Phum was still sitting there, expressionless, not engaging with anyone. We were definitely going to have a long talk about me going to the camp.

"What? Why are you looking at me?" Fang asked calmly, unfazed, and didn't move away from Tan.

"You and Tan are dating, right?"

"Yes, so what?" Fang's straightforwardness was impressive. Tan gave a thumbs-up to his boyfriend's coolness.

"Fai, how did you know?" Q asked, curious.

[T/N: Because she is a BL fan, 腐女, Fujoshi (ふじょし), hủ nữ. Feel free to add your input 😁.]

"Oh, should I tell you, in your group of nine or ten guys, who's the husband and who's the wife? It's not hard. Just look at how Tan looks at Fang. Friends don't look at each other like that. Pan, Mick, you still have hope with the girls. And you," she pointed at me, "who are you with, Q or Phum?" Q quickly waved a piece of paper, and waved it as a sign that he was raising the white flag. Fai turned to me, looking annoyed.

"Handsome... rich... smart... they've all mutated. And look at what's left for us, just scraps." She spat the word "handsome" at Phum, cursed "rich" at everyone, and threw "smart" around indiscriminately. "And look at what's left for us, just scraps."

[T/N: scraps = Pan and Mick??? I feel you, Fai. That's the reason we feel like we'll be single forever.]

I wanted to snap back at her, but even though she's my friend, she's still a girl, so I couldn't bring myself to do it. Don't wear a skirt, or I'll let the dogs loose on you.

"Hey, my brother finished his job. I'm leaving. See you later. Q, Peem, don't forget, tomorrow at the club room." Fai lifted her pleated skirt and jumped over the table. I was worried for her. Are you trying to compete with us, Fai?

"Will any guy take her in this lifetime?"

"Haha, at least you dated her, Fang."

"Shut up, Mick."

TBC>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>