Proofreader:SMV2454

We moved our base from the shop to the living room in the house. We did this because we wanted to have a conversation like this, and it wouldn't be appropriate to do it in the shop. Toey was still quiet, surrounded by all of us. Everyone was sitting on the sofa, except for Pan, who was sitting on the floor, looking up at Toey. What's wrong with you, Pan? Why do you want to know so much?

"Pan, would you like some popcorn and Pepsi?" Fang said sarcastically, and  Pan nodded.

"It's okay, Toey. You don't have to tell us. We know enough." said Tan, patting Toey's shoulder. Then he glanced at everyone and forced a smile.

"It doesn't matter, Hia. Anyway, you already know. Let's reveal everything. Toey is tired of having to conceal it for so long.'

We all smiled at him. Toey took a deep breath before finally letting go and joining Pan and Mick. What a bunch of characters!

"When Toey was in Mathayom 4 (US 10th grade)... Hey, don't be stressed. Relax." He smiled at us, and we just realized that we had accidentally made a stressed face.

"Damn, you're intentionally building this kind of  an atmosphere among us." I shouted.

"When did I build? You guys are overthinking."

[*บิ้ว/ bîw/ build (Tinglish), = create the atmosphere/mood.]

"Don't start selling drugs*, Toey," Mick said. Mick, you think this is some kind of drug-selling movie**, huh? But in reality, Mick actually improved the atmosphere compared to before because Toey seemed more relaxed.

[*= beat around the bush
** In case you forgot: A seller holds a free outdoor movies night and sells medicine, or other products]

I saw Matt nod his head to encourage Toey. Matt probably knew various things all along and was likely  Toey's sole counselor.

"Back in Mathayom 4 (US 10th grade), after school, Toey had to wait for my girlfriend at a coffee shop. Oh, at that time, I was dating a girl from Saint Francis."

I heard Phum and Chan laughing. I turn to look. You guys must have had the same experience, right?

Story from Nong Toey POV

When I was in M.4, after school, I used to wait for my girlfriend at a coffee shop near Siam Square every day. The reason we chose that shop was because it was close to our extra classes. She liked cake, while I liked milkshakes. We took the classes together and then took a little stroll before I sent her home.

The shop was a combination of a gallery and a café, since the owner was an artist. I often observed people through the clear glass of the shop. Every day, I would see a boy walking past the shop where I sat. He carried a drawing board, a bag of tools, and a perpetually smiling face. There was warmth and happiness around him, perhaps because he was doing something he loved.

I saw him every day, yet I never knew where he was headed. Maybe he went back home, or perhaps he found a spot to sit and draw. One day, as my girlfriend and I walked by, we saw him sitting there, sketching away.

Despite being around the same age, he seemed so free, simple and happy. While I struggled to find something I truly enjoyed, just living a pointless life everyday. I couldn't help but smile when he used a tree branch to shoo away two fighting dogs, creating a makeshift barrier with his drawing.

That evening, when I returned home, I lay down and began questioning myself: What did I want to do in the future? I started yearning for dreams, perhaps inspired by that boy who had become my muse.

I frequented that shop so often that I became familiar with the owner, P' Oh. One day, while waiting for my girlfriend as usual, I accidentally spilled my milkshake. P'Oh was going to call a staff to clean it up, but I volunteered to do it myself. I bent down under the table to wipe the floor and, by chance, noticed a peculiar-shaped wooden pencil case tucked away in a corner near a potted plant. It was an odd-looking pencil case made entirely of wood.

"P'Oh," I said, "I found this. It was fallen around here."

"Oh, really? Where did you find it? It belongs to my younger brother. He searched for it so hard that he almost turned the shop upside down."

"Please give it back to him. Is he your real younger brother?"

"No, we just happened to meet at a gallery. We got along well and became close friends. The artworks displayed here are all his. He's still in high school, probably around your age, you know."

"Wow, he's really talented! How can a high school student create such beautiful pieces?" I was amazed because each painting was beautiful. It made me wonder about that boy who walked past the shop every day. Could he possibly draw as beautifully as this?

"Well, if you set your mind to it, you can achieve anything. I'll let him know that you found it. I'm sure he'd be grateful. That wooden pencil case holds his passion and love."

The evening of the next day, I went to the café as usual. But that day, P'Oh told me that someone had left something for me. It was an A4-sized paper with a picture of a pencil smiling and saying thank you to a glass of milkshake. As soon as I saw the picture, I couldn't help but smile before bursting into laughter. It was cute and funny. The pencil (dinso) probably represented him, and the milkshake glass (nompan) probably represented me.

[T/N: I asked Copilot to create the sketch but it replied "Unfortunately, as an AI language model, I don't have the capability to directly create visual sketches or drawings." 🤣🤣🤣]

"Wow, it's beautiful."

"Umm, the owner of the pencil box  that you found has left it for you, saying thank you very much."

"P'Oh, is he coming today?" I wanted to wait to see him. I really wanted to talk to him, but my girlfriend came first and I had to go to extra classes.

"Come on, he comes every day."

"Please tell him I say thank you for the picture."

"You guys must be crazy, thanking each other back and forth."

"I wrote a note. Please tell him. It's behind the picture frame. Don't sneak a peek, P'Oh!"

"Uh, sure, if I don't forget, I'll tell him" P'Oh was busy washing glasses and didn't pay much attention to me.

I stuck a blue post-it note that said, "Thank you. The picture is so funny. ^^ From Nompan*." behind the picture frame hanging on the wall.

On the following day, I looked behind the picture frame. My blue note was missing, but there was a green one stuck in its place. I don't know why, but it made me happy to see the familiar handwriting that said, 'Draw as well as me first: from P'Dinso*.'

[T/N: Should I use "Phi Dinso and Nong Nompan" or "Phi Pencil and Nong Milkshake"???🤔]

After that day, our exchange of messages through notes began. I would go to the shop at nearly 5 PM, leaving a little past 5 PM to attend extra classes. Meanwhile, P'Dinso would come to the shop around 9 PM, so we never had a chance to meet.

"No, I don't want to compete with you, Phi. I'm  just worried that you won't be famous. Haha. What school are you in?"

"I'm a noble man, and my building is very long. What about you? P.S.  Don't trick yourself."

[*Suankularb Wittayalai School is an all-boys secondary school for grades 7 through 12 in Bangkok. Founded by King Chulalongkorn, its purpose was to educate the children of nobility and the royal household. The first building at its present site (called the Memorial Suan Kularb Building, but known among students as "the long building" because for many years it was the longest building in the country.]

"Only the building  is long? Haha. P.S. I'm at a foreign temple School. My pants are in beautiful colors."

[*As mentioned in previous chapter, Toey studied at Assumption College, a Roman Catholic all-boys private school in Bangkok. And their uniform is in red and blue, like their logo. The school was founded by a French priest and it's all-boys so it's like a foreign temple. Poor them!
T/N: Damn, they're all fucking rich.]

P' Dinso and I gradually learned and got to know each other little by little because we could only talk a few sentences a day. From waiting eagerly for my girlfriend, I now became more excited about what P' Dinso would write on the note today.

It was fun, talking to someone I didn't know, consulting with someone I was new to, until it became a habit. I wanted to talk to him every day. Over time, I started writing folded paper notes about what I encountered and did each day, like talking to an older brother. Once, when I was heartbroken, I even consulted with P' Dinso.

At that time, I didn't feel any romantic feelings. Talking to P'Dinso felt like talking to an older brother. Being an only child, sometimes I wished I had an older brother, to play together, to flirt with girls together, to chat, and to play games.

"The girl dumped me, Phi. Damn, why does she want so much time?"

"Just buy her a watch, dude. Get one with a pendulum. It's so coolll!!!"

I was sad all day when Cream broke up with me, but when I saw P'Dinso's message in the evening, I smiled. After that, I didn't go to the shop to wait for Cream anymore, but to wait for P'Dinso's notes. I started to have good feelings for someone I had never met. I think it's something really nice, even though the relationship might seem a bit strange.

"P'Dinso, I think I like you. Do you like me?"

"Maybe. Damn, you're so bold. You're still a kid, and already confessing love to a man. Haha."

"So, what should we be? You already have a girlfriend. Want me to be your secret lover? Hehe."

"Wait until you look like Pei Panward (Thai actress), then dream of being my  secret lover. For now, you're my special person, you spoiled Nompan."

"Hmm, fine, spoiled Nompan is  the special person of P'Dinso. P'Dinso is the special person of spoiled Nompan. We're special people to each other. ^^"

"What are these two triangles without bases  for? To make a circle? That's cool."

"It's the symbol for a smiley face, you dumb P'Dinso. Hahaha."

And so, we became special people to each other.

From days to months, from months to many months, until it became a year of writing notes with P'Dinso. I still saw that man passing by the shop every day, just like before. Sometimes, I secretly wondered if he's as skilled at drawing as P'Dinso.

P'Dinso and I were very close; we talked about everything. Gradually, I learned what he likes and dislikes. Despite both of us being single again, we'd never met.

"P'Dinso, Nompan's father went on a trip to China and brought some snacks. Ask P'Oh ná."

"What the hell are your snacks? Tell your dad to change his tastes. Go eat some snacks from England, little bro. Haha."

That day, I carried a bag of snacks with me to my extra class, and walked around Siam like that.

As time passed, I was in Mathayom 5, and P'Dinso was in Mathayom 6, preparing for the entrance exam to the Faculty of Fine Arts. He wanted to study arts. I heard that his close friend was also taking the same exam. As the exam day approached, P'Dinso had less and less time.

"P'Dinso, where are you planning to go? Which faculty (ká-ná)? Likay troupe (ká-ná lí-gay) or monkey troupe (ká-ná lá-kon ling)? Hahaha."

[*Likay is a form of popular folk theatre from Central Thailand.]

"Yesterday, someone asked me the same question. Right now, they're at the hospital receiving saline solution."

"P'Dinso, Nompan's mother wants me to apply for a scholarship to Australia. I don't want to go."

"Go, go, Thailand will be  a better place, haha."

"Seriously, I don't want to go. If Nompan goes, don't miss me."

"Why are you overthinking it? Do you think you can pass the exam? You rotten Milkshake."

"I want to study medicine. I want to stay in Thailand. I want to be with P'Dinso."

[T/N: 😣 Why did I feel hurt when reading this?]

"I don't want to be with you, haha. What kind of doctor (mŏr)? Morlam (mŏr lam)? Midwife (mŏr dtam-yae)?"

[*Mor lam is a traditional Lao form of song in Laos and Isan.]

No matter what stressful situation I was in, P'Dinso always managed to make me smile.

"I really don't want to go to Australia. I don't want to be away from P'Dinso."

"No matter where you are or what you're doing, know that I'll always support you."

And then one day, the notes I used to get every evening disappeared. At that time, I thought P'Dinso was probably busy studying hard for exams and didn't have time to come to the shop. If he passed the exams, we'd probably chat like before. But I continued leaving a note every day, expressing how much I missed him and sending encouragement, wishing him luck to pass the exam.

However, a week passed, and P'Dinso still didn't show up. Two weeks, a month, two months went by, until almost a year had passed. Does P'Dinso know how each day feels for someone waiting? How much pain it causes? P'Dinso disappeared along with that other person who used to walk by the shop. I haven't seen either of them again. 

I still sat at the shop as usual. P'Oh asked why I looked so down lately, why I hadn't been checking the picture frame anymore. I could only smile. I glanced outside, and my eyes caught sight of someone I hadn't seen for months.

That guy today wasn't holding a drawing board. He was standing in front of the shop. His shirt had ink stains and messages all over it, a rose tucked in the pocket of his student shirt. He must have graduated. I'm happy for him, and as for P'Dinso—well, perhaps he has also graduated too. I miss him again.

"Oh, Ai Q, why is he standing in front of the shop?" I heard P'Oh say. Suddenly, I felt my body tense up, and that guy walked away.

"P'Oh, do you know that guy?"

"Who?"

"The one wearing a school uniform and standing in front of the shop just now."

"Haha, why are you asking such a strange question? How could I not know him? That's Q, the person who used to draw pictures for my shop, the owner of the pencil case you found. Remember? Today is the day he graduates. He called and said he'd come in the evening. Why did he suddenly appear? Oh, where has he been all this time? This guy has been acting strangely since Mathayom 6."

I heard P'Oh's voice, but I didn't understand the meaning. My brain remained oblivious. My hands and body grew so cold that I went numb. The owner of the pencil case and the person I once considered an idol turned out to be the same individual. The person I've known for two years, yet never been face-to-face, and the person I encounter every day without recognizing—they are one and the same.

My Phi Dinso

His name is Phi Q.

Is it a coincidence or what?

[T/N: 'Fate'. It's an intriguing twist of fate!]

I found out the truth on the last day. I didn't know whether to be happy or sad. From now on, neither P'Dinso nor that other person will come here. They are one and the same. And which university he would attend, I had no clue.

During summer holiday, I had to go to a summer school in Australia. So, I came to say good bye to P'Oh and couldn't resist checking behind the picture frame again, which held countless memories between me and that special person.

And what was behind the frame on that day made a man like me smile through tears...

A single withered rose

[T/N: 🤧]

As I entered  Mathayom 6, my life continued. Despite the rigorous studies and exam preparations—because I aspired to become a doctor—I worked hard. I attended extra classes and even had private tutors at home. Yet, every day, I still found time to visit Phi Oh's shop, even if only for a few minutes. It was a small but cherished part of my routine.

Then one day, there was a guidance camp. Senior students who had graduated returned to guide us on choosing our desired fields of study, exam preparation, and planning. Some seniors who were not alumni came along. Among them was someone I thought about every day—the person who used to write me a thousand notes, who once said I was his special person, and who introduced me to love, and then left without a word.

I met P'Q again. I remember crying at that moment. P'Q has changed a lot, and has become more handsome and cool, like those art students. But P'Dinso didn't recognize me. Well, how could he? He never knew who I was.

Matt was shocked,  and asked what was wrong with me, why I was crying. I replied, there he is, P'Dinso. I met P'Dinso, I met P'Q.

The first time I met that boy, he made me start searching for myself, searching for  my dreams until I found them.

But today, I chose to let go of my own dream—the dream of becoming a doctor. I started learning to draw, studying art, even though I had no natural talent. Yet, I persisted. Eventually, I became his junior,  and became  the Nong Code of the person I loved for three years.

Love is even more profound and multifaceted than we imagine.

And if I had the chance, I would ask P'Dinso:

Why did you leave Nong Nompan?

[T/N: Another beautiful melody💖! The author just added a link to the song, but since I'm a kind person (I learned it from Pan), I'll provide you with the translation of the lyrics. Listen to the song with a box of tissue 🤧]

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

[Am I not good enough, or did you find new love? (ฉันไม่ดีหรือเธอมีรักใหม่) by Akera]

You were here, and then you disappeared without explanation.
Why did you treat me so cruelly?
I'm left with tears.
So many memories of the past fill this room.

The pictures of you, the more I look, the more it hurts.
My heart feels like it's being torn apart every day.
Because I don't know why we hurt each other.

Am I not good enough, or did you find new love?
Where did you go? When will you return?
The person right here misses you until tears fall.
I still love you, still waiting for you every night.
Will you ever come back?"

Please pick up the phone, please answer me

Don't leave me like this.

Don't torture my heart.

End of Chapter 28 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Translator's note: My heart ached along every sentence I read. I can feel Toey's pain. It seems so real, I can literally feel it.

I hope my poor English didn't destroy this excellent literary work and ruin your reading experience. Hope you can feel the joy and sorrow behind the words.

Alright, that's all for today. I need some time to heal myself. My heart is still hurt.