Chapter 16: Family ties

Reese's POV

Therapy session #2

"Hello Reese. How are you"

"Just peachy. Hey can I have one?"

"Sure."

"Mhmm this is good. What flavor?"

"Peaches and cream."

"Nice."

"So did you so your homework assignment?"

"Nope."

"Reese..."

"Just kidding! Here it is."

"I see....I see...."

"You see what?"

"Reese from my examination of this one and the last one you wrote me, not much has changed."

"And that means?"

"It means that the problem is still the same. You still won't let go of that guilt. You still think it's your fault."

"......."

"It's eating you alive Reese. A guilt this strong, you have to let it go."

"I CAN'T."

"Yes you can. It'll take some time but you can."

"Sure."

"You know what else?"

"What?"

"I think you have low self esteem."

"Me? Low self esteem? Your kidding right?"

"Not physically." Agnes rolls her eyes. "Emotionally, your self esteem is non-existent. That's why you can't form any long term relationships."

"That is not true! I've been friends with one of my best buddies since we were kids!"

"Do you want to know why I think you've been friends with this person so long?"

"Let's her it."

"Birds of a feather flock together."

"English please?"

"It means you both are experiencing the same problem on a different level. Think of high school cliques. All the nerds band together, the geeks, the jocks, the popular girls. Why are they all together? Because deep inside they're one and the same. And those are the only people you'll let yourself form long term relationships with."

"Wow. How long did it take you to come up with that crap?"

"It's not crap. You won't let anyone different from you care for you because your scared they won't like what they see. And it all stems from your guilt."

"That's- thats a lie!"

"Is it?"

"You don't know anything about me!"

"Calm down Reese it's ok. The first step in healing is realizing the problem."

"No! Fuck this shit I'm out!"

"Reese come back!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Agnes words kept swirling in my head.

You won't let anyone different from you care for you because your scared they won't like what they see. And it all stems from your guilt

It wasn't true. It wasn't.

But it is. You push everyone away except Marcus. You push away your mom. You push away your friends. You even pushed away Krystal.

"SHUT UP!" I punched my room wall and the plaster gave way. My knuckles started to bleed.

I did not need help. I did not have a problem. I was fine.

I was fine.

"Reese what wrong?" Mom came into my room. "¡Dios mío!" She quickly rushed over and grabbed my hand. "¿Qué hiciste?"

"It's nothing." I muttered.

"Don't you dare tell me it's nothing! And why aren't you at your therapy session with Agnes? You promised you'd give it a try!"

"And I did mamá! But I can't do it anymore. It's not helping. Nothing helps."

"You are impossible! What do you want me to do? I try everything!"

"How about you just stop trying and let me suffer in peace!"

She backed out of my room and I slammed the door.

Krystal's POV

"And who might you be?" Jackie asked smiling at Josh.

"Uhhh I'm Josh." He replied nervously scratching his arm.

"Your the father am I correct?"

"Yes."

"Well it's nice to finally meet you." They shook hands.

"I'm just gonna speak to Krystal for a moment." She motioned Josh out of the room before closing the door.

"What?" I said crossly.

"I hope you know what your doing." She said mysteriously.

"I don't know what your talking about." I snapped. My skin started to prickle.

"Of course you don't." She opened the door to let Josh back in. Then she looked back at me.

"I have a sixth sense Krystal. That's all."

The appointment went as usual and I wished I had a camera to capture the look on Josh's face when he saw the baby. It was a mixture of awe and fear.

"Do you want to know the gender?" Jackie asked near the end of the appointment.

"No!" My voice was panicked. They both looked at me weirdly and I took a deep breath. "I want it to be a surprise."

"Ok." Jackie said slowly eyeing me. "Well your at the point in your pregnancy that you really need to watch your health. Gets lots of rest, try to stay out of stressful situations, and eat right. I'll have to prescribe you some prenatal vitamins to be taking daily. And of course you should start showing."

Great. So many things to remember. My life was a stressful situation. Not to mention one of my worst fears was coming true. I'd still have to go to school while pregnant. Everyone would know.

Josh rubbed my stomach which only calmed me slightly.

"You'll have to help her out a lot." Jackie said sternly to Josh. "I don't want her out by herself too much in case of an emergency."

"Of course." He nodded.

After we left Josh asked me if I wanted to do anything.

"I just want to go home and sleep."

"Alright."

I closed my eyes on the drive and fell into a short lived nap.

"What he is doing here?" Josh asked in a tight voice.

My eyes flew open and I saw Reese sitting by the gate.

"Did you invite him?" He questioned accusingly.

"No. I have no idea what he's doing here."

"I can tell him to leave."

"No." I repeated. "We're friends."

"Friends!?" Josh exclaimed incredulously. "Girls aren't just friends with Reese."

"Your point is moot as Kimora and Cheyenne have been his friends and nothing more. Don't you trust me?"

"It's him I don't trust." Josh muttered.

"Whatever." I opened my car door but Josh quickly rushed over to help me out.

"I'm not that pregnant yet." I said dryly.

Reese stood up then frowned when he saw Josh. Try to stay out of stressful situations.

Not possible.

"What're you doing here?" Josh asked his voice clipped.

"Here to talk to Krystal."

"Really? Well she needs to rest. She's pre-"

"JOSH!" I yelled. Oh. My. God. Who just goes blurting that shit out?

"You can leave now." I glared at him.

"But-"

I pulled him aside. "Don't ever try that shit again." I whispered. "When people find out they find out but you can't just go around announcing it."

"Sorry." He sighed.

"The homecoming game is tomorrow. You should go home and rest too."

"Your right. Take care ok?" He pulled me in a for a kiss then shot Reese one last look before getting in his car and driving off.  I stood there for a few minutes contemplating life. Then I walked back over to Reese.

"He doesn't like me does he?"

"Not really." Better to be honest than lie. It was pretty obvious anyway.

"Can't say I blame him."

"Is something wrong?" I changed the subject. "I know you hate coming over here."

"Forget it." He shook his head.

"Seriously? You can tell me."

"What was Josh talking about?" He suddenly asked.

"Huh?" I played dumb.

"He said you needed lots of rest because your something but then you cut him off. What was he talking about?" His eyes bored into mine. I started to sweat.

"I just have a stomach bug that's all. Food poisoning or whatever."

He stared at me.

"I don't believe you."

"Excuse me?"

"Your lying to me."

My defenses went up. "Ok well I'm gonna go inside now and we'll talk later when your not being an asswipe. See you at school."

I left him standing outside the gate.

Cheyenne's POV

I fixed my hair. Then I fixed it again. It was curly but tame after I had went through an entire bottle of gel. The doorbell rang.

"Coming!" I shouted.

I heard Daniels footsteps race past the bathroom and I groaned. He was sure to embarrass me. I ran after him and tackled him to the floor.

"No I've got it!" He struggled. When had he gotten so strong?

"Bite me." I grabbed the door handle first and stuck my tongue out at him. He flipped me off and I gasped. That little brat!

"Hey." Sebastian greeted me. He had on a button down shirt and dress pants which looked incredibly sexy on him.

"Why do you look like you just lost a fight?"

"Shut up. I won stupid." I pulled down my dress. Probably not my best idea to wrestle in it. Note to self: don't do it again.

"Someone told me these were your favorite." Sebastian held out a bag of gummy worms. I took the bag, a grin stretching across my face.

"You didn't!"

"I did." He smiled.

I was going to kiss him on the cheek but realized Daniel was still standing there. I glared at him.

"Go get ready for Ms.Perkins." I snapped. 

After he disappeared into his room I leaned up and kissed Sebastian on the cheek.

"Thank you."

"If it means I get to see your face like that then I'd buy you a hundred bags of gummy candy."

"You're too sweet. But are sure we should be going out? It's a school night and you have a big game tommorow. Shouldn't you be... I don't know, practicing?"

He rolled his eyes. "Chey I've been practicing all week. I need a break."

"Ok ok let me just get my purse and then we can drop of Daniel and Ava."

"Your mom working again?" It wan an innocent question but it made me stiffen.

"Yeah." I didn't look at him.

"Wow she works a lot. Does she ever get a vacation?"

"Oh I'm sure she's on one right now." I mumbled to myself as I rounded up Daniel and retrieved Ava. I didn't want to talk about her. I didn't even want to think about her.

"Spider-man Spider-Man!" Daniel yelled and zoomed past Ms.Perkins as soon as she opened the door. The old lady gently took Ava.

"You kids be safe ok?." She gave us a crooked grin before closing the door.

"So you got me all dressed up. Where to?" I turned to Sebastian.

"You'll see."

We pulled up to one of the more fancier restaurants in town called Mon amour. I started to get nervous as I had never been anywhere this fancy in my life.

"We could've just gone to Taco Taco." I said.

"This is a date, not a hangout." He responded.

"But it's so expensive!"

He put his hand on mine and tingles shot up my arm. "I've got it covered alright?" His chocolate brown eyes made me feel like I was melting as I stared into them.

"Alright."

He held my hand as we walked inside and I may have started to break out into a nervous sweat. What if my hair got frizzy? My makeup smudged? What if I completely humiliated myself? So many things could go wrong.

"Table for two please."

"Right this way." The waitress smiled leading us to our table. It was tucked into the corner and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"What would you like to drink?" She whipped out a pen and notepad. Sebastian looked at me expectantly.

"Umm I'll just have a sprite."

After she took our drink orders she gave us menus and said she'd be back to take our food orders. I opened up the menu. The prices had me sweating again. I may have had a well paying job but that certainly did not mean I could eat out like this everyday! I'd be broke in a month.

The restaurant mostly served French cuisine and I wrinkled my nose when I saw escargot. However when my eyes fell on the word steak I almost cried tears of joy. Stake was a rarity as it was so damn pricy.

"What're you getting?" Sebastian asked.

"The steak. How about you?"

"I think I'll try the Boeuf Bourguignon."

When she came back to take our orders I gladly told her mine. Afterwards I sipped on my sprite and stared at Sebastian.

"What?"

"People go on dates to get to know each other doofus. Tell me about yourself."

"Oh no you know plenty about me. Remember the park?"

"How could I forget Clifford?" I smirked. Then my face started to get warm as I remembered what happened after that.

"Exactly. Your turn."

"Fine. I am secretly an otaku girl."

"What then hell is that?" He asked.

"I'm obsessed with anime. Although I hardly show it."

"Anime? Isn't that like porn?"

"Oh my gosh NO!" I smacked his arm. "There's so much more to it than that. And anime porn is called hentai by the way."

"How would you know that?" He raised a brow.

"I was curious. I wish I hadn't searched it up though." I shivered remembering.

"What's your favorite anime?"

I taped my chin in thought. "That's a really good question. There's so many I couldn't possibly choose. I'm really into Kamisama Hajimemashita right now."

"I'm gonna pretend like I understood that."

"One day we'll marathon an anime."

"One day." He shook his head laughing. Just then our food came. I greedily tore into my steak. The edges were perfectly crisped and the insides were juicy. Halfway through our meal Sebastian started talking again.

"Tell me about your family."

I froze, the piece of meat I was swallowing lodging halfway down my throat.

"I mean I know you have a little sister and brother but what about your mom? What's she like besides a workaholic?"

"She's-" I paused. "Can we not talk about my family?" His brow furrowed.

"Why not?"

"Because-" I searched for the right words. I didn't want to lie to him. But I wasn't ready to tell him the truth either. So I settled for this: "Because she's annoying and talking about her gives me a headache. Same for my dad."

"Understandable." He said.

"What about your family?" I changed the subject.

"Just me and my sis."

"That's it? What about your mom and dad?"

His easy going smile dropped and I quickly backtracked.

"I mean you totally don't have to tell me." I rushed out. "We can work our way up to it or-"

"I don't see my my mom much." He spoke quietly.

"Divorce?" I questioned sympathetically while taking a sip of my drink.

"No." He looked up at me. "My mom has cancer."

I choked on the sprite and my eyes widened. Holy shit!

"She came home a while back but was re-admitted after she collapsed." He continued. "The treatments aren't going too well."

"What about your dad?" I whispered.

"Eh piece of shit. He became an alcoholic soon after my mother was diagnosed."

Guilt blossomed in my stomach. I couldn't believe the way I had judged him so harshly when we'd first met.

You think you're so great Sebastian with your perfect life and macho attitude.

"I'm sorry."

The corners of his mouth lifted. "Out of all the people you're the last person I expected pity from."

"I'm not sorry about your mom or dad. I mean I am but that's not what I meant. I'm sorry that I judged you so badly when we first met. You were right at Charles party."

"I'm always right." He smiled cockily and I rolled my eyes at him.

It was 9:30pm when he walked me up to Ms.Perkins door. We stood there awkwardly staring at each other.

"This is the part where you kiss me." I said in a teasing voice although my heart was pounding.

"I'm not sure I wanna try that again."

"Oh come on you said you forgave me! You're never gonna let that go are you?"

"Nope." He replied popping the p.

"Well goodnight then." I pouted secretly disappointed he wasn't going to kiss me. Just as I prepared my knuckles to knock on the door his hand shot out and pulled me to him before his placed his lips on mine.

My legs turned into over-cooked noodles and his arms wrapped around my waist to support me. His tongue slipped into my mouth and I ran my hands through his hair probably messing it up from its original slicked back style. When he lightly squeezed my ass through my dress I moaned.

When we broke apart he gazed at me and I gazed back. I probably should have been embarrassed, but I mean I couldn't just not stare at him.

"Goodnight Cheyenne." He said in a husky voice.

"Goodnight." Then he was gone. I stood there trying to catch my breath. Suddenly the door swung open.

"There you are!" Ms.Perkins exclaimed. "Daniel is doing Spider-man impressions again. Right now he's about to try and jump off the bookshelf!"

Oh Lord.

Kimora's POV

I dialed Rozae's number. The phone rang and rang before a voice picked up. "Hello?"

"It's me."

"Oh hey Kimmy." There's some shuffling over the line before she speaks again. "How are you?"

"I've seen better days. What about you? Are you ok?"

"Am I ok?" She repeats laughing. "Well not really no. I can confidently say my life has gone to shit since Vincent died."

The words are at the tip of my tongue. I'm sorry. But I bite them back before they can escape. Rozae isn't the type to accept pity. And deep down, some sick twisted part of me rejoices in the fact that she's suffering as much as me.

Misery loves company after all.

I guess I'm silent for too long because she speaks again. "I'm moving back to Texas."

"Oh." I should feel disappointed. I should feel sad. This is my friend after all. But instead I just feel...nothing.

"Yeah. I want to give you something before I leave. Meet me at the skate park?"

The skate park. The pain comes unexpectedly, branding my chest like a hot poker. It's been nearly a month. I should be over it. I should. He wasn't my boyfriend. We weren't even that close friends.

So why does it still hurt so much?

"I'll see you there in twenty." Then I hang up. Breathing deeply I grab the brown baggie next to me and quickly roll up a quickie before lighting it. The smoke helps me relax, free the tension that's seeped into my muscles. Once it's all burned out I discard the evidence and tuck the lighter in my pocket before heading out.

It takes me ten minutes to get to the skate park. Rozae is already waiting for me on a bench, just watching the teen boys hoot and holler as they perform tricks on the ramp. I take a seat silently beside her and wait for her to speak first. When it's clear that's she content to just sit there and watch the boys skate I blow out an irritated sigh.

"What did you want to give me?" I ask, my tone laced with impatience.

She wordlessly reaches for something under the bench and I'm confused when she pulls out a skateboard.

"You wanted to give me your skateboard? No offense but I'm not really the skater type."

"It's not mine." Her voice sounds dry and crackly, different from over the phone. "It's Vincent's."

I just stare at her. Is this some sick joke? She wants to give me Vincent's skateboard? His most prized possession?

"Why?" I ask my voice hard.

"He'd want you to have it." Is her measly explanation. "And I- I don't want it."

"You don't want your dead best friends skateboard?" I laugh harshly. "What makes you think I want it?"

"Just take it." She shoves the board at me like she's getting rid of a cursed object. In a way, it is cursed. Cursed with the memory of Vincent.

Rozae stands up abruptly. "Goodbye Kimora." Then she's off into the sunset.

I stare at the offending object resting on my lap. Then it hits me. Why it hurts so much. Why I can't seem to let go of him.

If I let Vincent go, then a part of me will die. The good part of me, the part that listens to my parents, does what she's told, and doesn't break the rules. The one that doesn't smoke pot. Vincent has that part of me, and he's clinging on to it in his afterlife, not willing to part with it. I'm struggling to get that part of me back, but he won't give it to me, and the weight of his death is a burden that I just can't carry. I'm trying to, so I can still keep the good inside me, but his presence outweighs it.

If I let him go, them the darker side of me will take over. And honestly, that's entirely what I want.

I realize that the darker side of me has been trying to get free, but I've never let it until now. I was determined to keep it locked away forever no matter what. To be perfect little Kimora. That's why I've been feeling so empty lately. The good in me is disappearing, hanging on only by a thread, and all I have to do is snip it off.

Then I can truly be free. It's what I've always wanted deep deep down. To do what I want. Not what people expect of me.

Poor Kimora pretending for so long to be who's she's really not. Poor Kimora always the nice person, always forgiving, always good. Poor Kimora who never does what she wants because she has to keep up flawless image. Poor Kimora with the selfish parents who don't care about what she desires. Poor poor Kimora now that she finally realizes after all these years it's her life and she holds the steering wheel driving it.

I stand up with resolve, a fierce determination in my eye. Right there, in front of the world I snap Vincent's skateboard in half using the park bench. Honestly I'm not sure where the strength comes from. I'm left with two pieces of wood, the jagged edges sharp enough to pierce your soul. I place the wood symbolically on the ground and using the lighter in my pocket I set the wood on fire. It catches quickly and in no time the smell of smoke wafts into the air.

Goodbye Vincent. Goodbye.

I stomp out any flames that try to creep away from the broken wood. People could be watching, staring at the girl crazy enough to set something on fire in public. Let them watch. Let them see that it was in this moment I finally stood up and made a decision for me.

No more poor Kimora.

Sebastian's POV

I can't stop reliving tonight with Cheyenne. Many thoughts race across my mind but the one thing that sticks out like a sore thumb is that she noticeably shuts down the moment the mere mention of her mother comes up.

I want to know why.

Sadly all I'm given to work with are bits and clues. Things I've heard.

Her family isn't the best off. Absent father. Single mother. I know her mom works as a nurse at the hospital. The same hospital where my mother is being held. I've never seen her there though.

There's also rumors. She has three different baby daddies for each child. She's secretly a prostitute. Shes a whore. A gold digger. Try's to trap men into paying child support by getting pregnant.

None of it adds up. I don't believe the rumors. So the only thing I've got left is what I've seen for myself. Which leads me back to square one because I've literally seen nothing.

I sigh and roll over in bed. I'm trying to sleep but it's always at night when I want my brain to stop thinking that it wants to start. And I need my energy for the game tomorrow.

There's a bang downstairs and I sit up straining my ears to listen. It's quiet again but I know I heard something. Cautiously I slip out of bed and creep downstairs. Stupidly I didn't bring a weapon in case it could be a burglar so my fists will have to do.

I flick on the kitchen light and the figure shrieks.

"Hales?"

"Oh it's just you Sebby." She places a hand over her heart. "You  scared me."

"Why are you up so late?" I walk over to her.

"I was hungry. Usually when I get hungry in the middle of the night mom makes me a snack but she's not here so..." Her voice trails off and she hugs herself tightly.

"I'll make you something then. What do you want?"

"I want pancakes!"

"That's not a snack."

"But mom-" her bottom lip trembles and I sigh again. I love Haley to death but taking care of her is starting to take it's toll on me. Will she ever be able to truly be on her own? Will I have to take care of her forever? The thought strikes fear in my heart.

I get to work mixing the batter and pouring it onto pancake maker. Once finished she adds smiley faces using blueberries from the fridge. I watch her eat my eyelids drooping.

"Can we watch The Lion King?"

"Hales there's school tomorrow. I have a game. Let's try and get some sleep."

Her eyes light up and I know I have five seconds before she throws a tantrum.

"Fine." I snap and she claps before racing to the living room. I follow after her tiredly and settle down on the couch beside her. Not even ten minutes into the movie I start to nod off.

"Sebby don't fall asleep." Haley nudges me awake. I grab the remote from her hands and switch off the television. I can't let her get her way just because she might flip shit if she doesn't.

"Listen Haley. I'm tired. My homecoming game is tomorrow. School is tomorrow. The average teenager needs about eight to nine hours of sleep. I'll be lucky if I get six now. So I'm going to bed. You can either stay down here and pout or try to get some sleep too."

"Mom would let me stay up." She argues. I explode.

"Well mom isn't here! She's in the hospital a little sick if you haven't noticed. And maybe you don't realize it but I'm only a year older than you! I have needs too. But I always put them aside to take care of you. Always. But for once I'm putting my needs above yours. So get your ass up those fucking stairs and into bed!"

I hardly ever yell at Haley so she sits stunned before tears start to trickle down her face. I'm too tired to feel bad. Wordlessly she gets up and marches upstairs before slamming her door. I follow after her into my own room.

The second my head hits the pillow I'm out.

The funny thing about Sebastian's POV is that I'm writing it at night and I'm actually really freaking tired. So I'm gonna go to bed.

Before that though I just wanna say that everything about Cheyenne in this chapter is molded from me. Lol I basically took everything about me and put it into her character. Honestly I think I can relate with her the most. Besides the missing parent thing.

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*yawns*

Ok goodnight😴

Stay groovy✌️

-not edited-