Hi everyone! This painting is the "View of La Crescenza" 1649 by Claude Lorrain. It doesn't have an obvious relationship to this chapter, but I listened to the Bridgerton soundtrack as I wrote this chapter out and this painting came to mind... I just think it's really beautiful.

I hope you're all having a lovely week and if not I hope this chapter can at least bring some joy to your hour.

Before you read this, I'm going to ask you to put your phone down, go to the kitchen and get yourself a drink of water. You need to stay hydrated!

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Lycius was human again and it was unsettling. Despite the beautiful complexion, the smug smile, and being dressed head to toe in black... I couldn't seem to sit comfortably in the car ride next to him. Not when I felt like I was flushed all over and that something sinister was crawling under my skin. My mind and my body couldn't decide whether or not it was attracted to him in this new style, or absolutely appalled that he was able to transform back into himself all this time. Now I knew I was fabulous in my paint-stained jeans and baggy hoodie but felt frumpy compared to the silver jewellery and leather jacket set up. He was a mouth-watering sight that I couldn't stand to look at. And I was mad about it because it was the first time in the longest time that I felt inadequate and yet superior at the same time. Anger will do that. Maybe my period was due soon. All I knew was that I was mad. Beyond all reason...

Neither of us made much conversation while he drove through the slopes and winding streets of the suburbs. The light bouncing off the luxury bungalows transitioned to blocky concrete apartments until we reached one of the main shopping strips. It didn't click that we were driving in the wrong direction until I recognised my art supply shop.

He parked the car across from it. When he turned off the engine, I caught his knuckles burning white as he gripped the steering wheel. I had read that as a sign of his own anger, so I geared up for the fight and had the quips ready on the tip of my tongue.

Finally, he looked at me. 'Do you need to buy anything?'

'Um... Not really?' I said body pressed up against the door.

'Calix has the day off,' he said. Okay, that explains nothing. 'And I don't know how long I'll get to keep this body. So, if you need something, we're better off getting it now.'

My posture softened, I unbundled myself from my resentment and felt a weight being lifted. 'Do you trust me to drive your car if that does become an issue?' I said.

He hesitated. 'Yeah.'

Huh. 'How long do you normally have in this body?'

He hesitated again. 'Last time it was an hour.'

'How long ago was that?' I said sadly. Now feeling that puncture of guilt in my chest.

He shrugged nonchalantly. 'I don't remember.' His hands still clenched the wheel.

'Okay.' I hid my face with my hand as my boss walked gingerly out of the shop. 'Can we go? I told my boss I was sick today.'

'You haven't quit?' he said. His brow furrowed.

'No. Why would I?'

'You don't trust me,' he said genuinely offended.

'You showed up at my front door like this,' I waved my hand over his clothes. 'Okay. I feel like I'm the one that's been lied to.'

'What you'd rather I look like a monster?'

'Only if it makes you happy.'

His laugh was cold. 'If it makes me happy?' He muttered something incoherent under his breath as he started the car. Even though I didn't know what he said I knew it was something insulting therefore we were back to our lively chat to ourselves in our minds. Both angry, or uneasy and not ready to talk to each other.

We drove further away out of town, the pine trees standing like oppressive figures shadowing us with their judgement.

This was weird. Was I being the child here? I should have been excited for him! He felt well enough to be in his body again and it made him come to see me. Dear Gods when you put it like that then it's all very sweet.

I should kick myself.

'Hey...' I started. Lycius interrupted with a loud irritated groan kicking my defences back up.

'Can you...' He sucked in a deep breath. Like he was trying to tame the thoughts in his brain. I noticed the fine muscles in his cheek bulge and throb as if something was trying to worm its way out. Lycius felt it and let out a strangled cry and shook his head violently almost driving us off the road into a signpost. I grabbed the wheel and shouted at him to park the car immediately.

When Lycius did park he did a crooked job of it with the bonnet sniffing the bushes and the back of the car still lingering out on the road. My heart hammered in my chest and I reached out to touch his arm to check if he was alright but Lycius flew out and started for the tree line – leaving the keys in the ignition.

I fixed the parking, so the car was completely off the road before going after him. I kept the keys in between my fingers so they jutted out like little knives just in case Lycius was "having a moment".

I trusted him not to hurt me. But whatever sickness he has needed to be quelled for both of us to feel safe in his company.

If it wasn't broad daylight this would be so much easier because, let's face it, car keys aren't a sufficient form of self-defence.

The further I walked the bleaker the forest got. The closer the trees crept and crowded around me. I blindly relied on my gut to track him, but I found Lycius sitting cross-legged on the forest floor with his back to me. He looked like he was meditating – or trying to – his expression did give off that he was trying to control his bowel movements.

I wanted to say something, but I doubted he would have appreciated the shit joke even when it would have been perfect retribution.

My heart ached for the jacket that was now slightly torn and laid next to him in the dirt. The seam around the right shoulder had ripped apart as if something large had made it burst open. When I scanned the rest of his clothes, they looked stretched and weathered as if time had drastically passed by me since I'd gotten out of the car. Lycius was using his whole upper body to breathe, he flinched as his shoulders concaved inwards and he straightened up again to take more labouring breaths. His eyes were sewn shut and his jaw locked as he concentrated on combating the shift.

A loud crunch split the silence when I took step.

'Just wait,' he said.

I knelt down behind him. Blatantly ignoring his request and firmly, but gently, grabbed his shoulder. His breathing hitched but his body continued to shiver even while burning up through his turtleneck.

'You're okay,' I said. I squeezed his shoulder, it tensed up under my hold. 'You're okay.'

'Rhea...' he said in a warning tone. 'Please just go back to the car.'

'I'm not leaving you out here,' I said settling down behind him and leaned my back against his. He was sweltering hot that I was starting to sweat in my own clothes, and it made me think about the limited amount of interaction I've had with werewolves. I had never really seen them change. Did it hurt just as badly as it did for Lycius? I knew it was different for him. That he was different. Calix was clearly his carer and his mother, well, I wasn't sure about his mother. I didn't want to assume that she was ashamed of him being like this...

There was something about all this that just didn't make sense. Why? Why was this happening in the first place?

I felt Lycius stop shaking. He took a deep breath and leaned into me. 'I might be awhile.'

'I've got time,' I said. Then I added with a little drop of venom, 'According to you.'

'I would have respected your rejection,' he said. It took me a moment to realise what he was talking about.

'Not in front of Giannis,' I countered. 'You men are not subtle.'

'I would have respected you,' he said sounding like he was biting back the pain. I shifted my spot on the ground so I could press my face into Lycius' shoulder, to remain a physical presence – a support to him. I just wanted a hit of his aftershave.

'I wanted to go with you anyway,' I said. I've always wanted to go with you. 'And it's not because of Giannis. Though it would be a lie to say he wasn't part of the reason today.'

He chuckled darkly. I took it as a good sign. 'Why was he there?'

'If I knew the way that man thought we'd all be doomed.'

'So, he runs on delusions then,' he said. Why did I feel like he was baiting an answer out of me?

'Much like you, Giannis lives in his own reality where everyone serves him and wants to serve him.'

He shifted his head to look down at me. His black hair hooding his eyes. 'What's my reality?'

I sat up and pushed his hair back to reveal those brilliant cobalt eyes. 'I'm still figuring it out. But I can tell...'

Lycius turned his body, so his side was facing me, he propped a leg up and leaned on his right arm as he dared to look at me with a smirk readying to strike. My hand dropped to my lap.

'Well?' he said.

I tilted forward mimicking his position. My gaze darted to each brilliant eye before reaching down to his lips. I eyed his mouth like it was a serpent about to bite me.

I eyed it as if I wanted to be bitten.

'I can tell that you're lonely. And what's delusional about that is that you think you're supposed to be,' I said.

His lips fell into a firm line. 'You're pitying me.'

I scowled. 'Don't be a man about it.' I hoisted us back onto our feet and picked up his jacket. 'Come on, Beast. Let's get you home. I'm driving.' I made a show of flashing the keys before spinning around and venturing my way back to the car.

Lycius' attitude felt colder than the day we were both enduring and both clearly exhausted as we got back into the car. His hands sat uncomfortably in his lap and at that point, he was right, I did pity him. Just a little. Not because he was pitiful but there was no point in trying to explain that to him. It was taking the sight of him in that made my chest swell, made the air thin, and the day bright – too bright.

I knew this would be one of the rare moments that I would have the courage to do this. So, I moved quickly and bent towards him causing a stumble on the angry spiel he appeared to be spinning in his head. That war-torn expression melted away and, in a flash, he was moving in, eyes on my mouth, coming into me...

I bent back and pulled his seat belt with me. We froze at the sound of the click.

As I bit back the grin I settled back into my seat and started the car. We drove onwards to the Mavros Manor. His eyes bore into me and even when I knew he wasn't looking at me, I knew I had spoiled whatever righteous resentment that had poisoned him in the forest.

I had embarrassed him.

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