Olivia

Thursday, July 18th, 12:50am.

"I'm fine, I just want to lie down in the car," I assure Danica as I keep walking and don't look back.

It's what it's been like these past couple of weeks, constant unyielding worry for me.

And I'm sick of it.

I'm relieved when she doesn't follow me, both she and Paxon staying behind as I don't even bother to look over my shoulder at them. I unlock the car right as my legs threaten to give out and I'm reminded of what brought me here; the nausea I felt when I saw them preparing to bury the mannequin.

The rhythmic, metallic ring as the spades dug into the ground, followed by the thump of dirt being tossed out of the hole.

I shudder as I try to forget the smell of the blood, of the wet dirt beneath the sand as it piled up outside of the hole. It's a smell that isn't unfamiliar to me.

I yank the door open and scramble into the back seat. Plastic crinkles beneath me as I lie down and pull the door shut before I hit the lock button on the keys.

I dry-heave a few times, my mouth feeling like it's stuffed with cotton as the coppery smell sticks to the back of my throat.

In through the nose, out through the mouth.

I repeat it to myself several times as I try to follow through with it.

But it's already too late and I can feel myself slipping under the waves of the night I've tried so hard to forget.

****

Past: May 17th

Water is flooding my lungs as my hands reach out to claw at it. Desperate to get to the surface. To air.

How did I get here?

I can't remember.

There are bubbles brushing against my skin like invisible fingers and when I open my eyes it's dark enough that I can't tell up from down.

Can't breathe, can't see.

I'm helpless and I'm sinking.

I'm going to die, this is how I die.

There's a faint sound, like an explosion and I'm suddenly being dragged through the water.

But it's too late.

Because I've run out of air.

****

I jerk awake not realizing that I've passed out as I try to figure out why I woke up. There's a tapping noise and I look up to see that Elijah is standing at the window closest to me. I hit the unlock button and he opens the door as he holds out his hand for the keys.

"Here," I rasp as I gladly give him the keys and climb over the seat to the passenger's.

The other doors open as everyone else gets in, including Paxon. He gets into the driver's seat and starts it, the car shuddering to life as he eases the car forward. I lean back into the seat, relaxed but still tense as I don't dare look in the back.

I'm confused when he pulls up along the sand dunes, the headlights cutting through the dark to reveal the waving sprigs of grass as he presses down on the horn.

Brrt!

I jump at the noise, the horn on the car having obviously not been used in a while as it sounds forced. Paxon flinches at my movement, his eyes darting to mine as he watches me uneasily.

"You okay?" he asks in a low voice.

"Yeah, why are we stopping?" I whisper.

"Because we're not leaving without Derrick," Mila snaps from the back seat.

I look over my shoulder then and I'm surprised to see that he's not in the back of the car with them.

"Where did he go?"

"I don't know, he left the same time you did and walked off in your direction. You didn't see him?" Mila questions.

Her tone is accusing but I resist the urge to bristle, she's always been territorial of him, especially since I'm his most recent ex. Fighting with her now would only make me look all the more guilty of doing something I didn't do, no matter how much she insinuates.

The last thing I would ever do with Derrick is have sex with him let alone even touch him.

Paxon honks the horn again and shakes his head.

"Look, he was a little buzzed right? He probably wandered off, but I'm not going to stay here all night waiting for him, I have work tomorrow," he growls as he puts the car in drive.

Mila doesn't protest but I can almost feel her glare as she sulks in the back seat. I'm relieved and at the same time irritated. Relief for the fact that she doesn't say anything, but I know she's boiling with anger that will make a reappearance later.

And for what? Derrick doesn't care about her the same way she thinks she cares about him.

But it's a lesson she's going to have to learn for herself.

Like I did.

Streetlights dot the sides of the road as we leave the park behind and enter the outskirts of Kingsford, the dark windows of closed businesses passing us by like closed eyes. I can't help but feel like a weight has lifted for the night, since there's no Derrick sitting the back seat watching my every move.

If only it could stay that way.