Danica

Saturday, July 27th, 11:28pm.

"She's waking up I think."

I can barely hear the voice, but when I do, I want to wake up. I fight against the weights that are keeping my eyelids pinned shut and at last, I open them. I recognize my surroundings immediately as the air becomes too thick to breathe and my mouth dries out.

I can't think.

My eyes flit down from the party cabin's blue ceiling as I try to block out that night. The music. The vapor from e-cigarettes. It all comes rushing back and I am defenseless as I look around.

Green eyes watch me as I blink into awareness. I freeze, the breath in my body refusing to move as I stare. I know deep down that they are not his eyes after a moment, but I can't help seeing the similarity.

"Hello, Danica."

I blink at the owner, someone I had known since childhood.

Josh smiles at me and for a moment I can believe that it's a genuine one, that he means it. But his eyes are cold.

Empty.

An ember of something is glimmering in them and as I watch, something seems to stoke it as he looks from me to something past me. I'm sitting on a couch, the cushions soft under me as I look around. Sat on a barstool next to me is Paxon, beyond him Elijah. I look the other way to see that Mila is hunched on a stool at the counter as she sniffles loudly.

Olivia is crouched on the couch cushions beside me, her hand reaching over to intertwine with mine as she squeezes tightly.

What happened...?

Eli had been driving and then we were rear-ended.

The roundabout.

We had crashed.

The world sways as Josh stands up from the chair that he's sitting on. Everything is too bright as I blink up at him and he stops in front of me.

"I know one of you did it."

His words are a harsh reality I'm unprepared for.

"We did nothing wrong," Olivia says even though her voice shakes and my heart pinches.

Oh Livy.

Josh's face darkens, his eyes boring into hers as he shakes his head.

"That's not what I want to hear."

"Josh, please-."

He cuts off her pleading by reaching for something behind his back and I'm faced with the end of a pistol. I stare back at the dark, circular hole as I can almost see my death in it.

"Shut up! Tell me the truth! Tell me who killed Derrick before I blow one of your fucking heads off!"

The gun jumps from one of us to the next, his eyes following his aim as he stares each of us down. Like he can see the truth.

If only the truth were as straightforward as he thought it was.

"Josh, it's not that simple," I say as I wet my lips with my tongue and swallow.

His eyes burn into mine as my heart shudders and trembles in my chest. I take a breath to steady it, but it does nothing as I choke out a couple of words.

"I know who did it."

Olivia's hand tightens around mine, her eyes snapping to me as she gives me a puzzled look. Beyond her, Paxon's eyes widen.

"Put the gun down and I'll tell you," I order Josh in the strongest voice I can muster.

He does, his attention wired to me as I at last have a shred of control. The gun thumps to the floor. He even takes the magazine out of the pistol so it's no longer loaded as he tosses it across the room.

I know it won't take much for him to reload it, but I have to trust that the truth will knock some sense into him.

Or at least shock him.

"Danica, what do you mean you know who did it?" Olivia asks in the silence that follows, her voice shaking as she looks to me.

Her eyes are wide and afraid and the reality of everything comes crashing down on top of me. It's like a thousand bricks have been stacked on top of my chest. I look down at her hand held in mine. The same hand I held when I though she was dead.

I look past her at Paxon.

He nods once, his jaw set as a single tear wells up in his eye.

In a voice that is just loud enough for her to hear, I tell her.