Warriors Writing Contest #1 (Results 1)
Here are the final results for Round 1!!
[We apologize for the long delay]
Round 1-A
Clarity
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Uniqueness
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Interestingness
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Detail
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Total
Score: 0/70 - DISQUALIFIED
~~~
Clarity
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: I felt the story was way too short and that the sentences were not spaced well. I didn't quite understand some parts and it seemed super rushed.
Uniqueness
Score: 4/10
Reasoning: It felt it was how it always went, that a cat from another Clan can't fall in love with any other cat than from inside their own. However, I did think it was cool you made Ash a rogue instead of another Clan cat.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: Just a few punctuation errors.
Interestingness
Score: 3/10
Reasoning: I didn't think it was interesting because it was how it always goes and it didn't really catch my attention because it was so short. I didn't see much of a mood and I couldn't see much effort and it seemed very rushed.
Detail
Score: 2/10
Reasoning: I didn't see any detail at all.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 3/10
Reasoning: I couldn't see any emotion from the characters, only a thought from Ash.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: It does meet the requirements, however I feel it could been rewritten to something much more intriguing.
Total
Score: 34/70
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Round 1-A Winner: Warrior_at_Heart
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Round 1-B
Clarity
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: You made sure that your words were clear and thought through and that the plot continued to be steady and not rushed. You made sure to create an intriguing story with a clean, flowing plot with well-fitted sentences.
Uniqueness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: I thought it was unique, but it's usually what happens to kits. We were looking for something a bit more creative, but besides that the story was still amazing.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: There were very little mistakes, only a few spelling errors.
Interestingness
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: The plot was intense, intriguing and eye-catching. I loved how you made sure not to rush into it and that you kept the plot vivid and solid. The characters were well-thought through, the storyline was intense, and I loved how you took the time to describe how the fox was beaten.
Detail
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: The detail was overwhelming and incredible. There were so many words that caught my attention and how you described the setting was terrific. I loved every part of your descriptions.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: The emotion was amazing. You showed how much Lilypelt loved her two kits, Viperkit and Alterkit, by leaping on that big fox and attacking it alone. You described what Redwing usually was like, and how Lilypelt felt no sympathy for her and her kits, Drizzelkit and Yarrowkit. I felt the emotion of each character thoroughly.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: Yes. The whole story is about the mother, Lilypelt, trying her best to protect her kits after hearing the devastating news that a fox was scented. Once her kits are gone, she does the hardest she can to find them and save them, which is exactly what we were looking for.
Total
Score: 65/70
~~~
Clarity
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: I felt your story was clear and well-written, however I feel you could
Uniqueness
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: I think it's very unique because Copperkit is from RootClan and he ran away because he knew his Clan couldn't heal him, not that he was abandoned which is what usually happens, so I was impressed.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Only a few punctuation and spelling errors.
Interestingness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: The story was intriguing because I really wanted to see if Copperkit and the other warriors would make it, but I do feel there could be something else.
Detail
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: There was detail, but I felt like there could've been more. I wanted to experience what these cats were going through more, where they were more and where they got all these herbs from.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: I didn't really see any emotion through out the characters other than that they were scared and defensive.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Yes. It was a great example of a medicine cat (Dawnpool) saving a kit (Copperkit). The cause of illness was Greencough, which is commonly used, but with the 'sacred herb' (as I call it), it covered that up well.
Total
Score: 55/70
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Round 1-B Winner: Blazestorm
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Round 1-C
Clarity
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Uniqueness
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Interestingness
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Detail
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 0/10
Reasoning: Did not enter story.
Total
Score: 0/70 - DISQUALIFIED
~~~
Clarity
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: I felt the story could've been clearer because there were some points where I got confused and didn't quite understand what was happening. I also felt that you rushed into things a little too much and I think some of the sentences could've been cut off much sooner.
Uniqueness
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: I loved the idea that Frogleap and Cricketpaw found the shiny thing in a dead monster. I felt that was really unique, and I was surprised that Creekpaw had died at the end. I wasn't expecting that.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: There were several grammar mistakes, some where you forgot to add some words.
Interestingness
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: I thought it was decent with interest. I loved the plot line and how you made it so Pinestripe was really defensive over Sorrelflower.
Detail
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: There was detail, but I felt there could be much more to describe for the shiny thing and the camp because I couldn't exactly identify what the shiny thing even was except for the title.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: I didn't really see any emotion through the story, but I did notice a lot of thoughts from Frogleap.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Yes. The only reason I gave this a 9/10 was because gold wouldn't exactly be laying in a dead monster... I mean, who would abandon such a prize? But yes, it does meet the requirements.
Total
Score: 54/70
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Round 1-C Winner: PoppyTea
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Round 1-D
Clarity
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: Some sentences are worded weirdly and/or didn't make sense.
Uniqueness
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: I like how you threw in the quarrel with Thornpaw to contribute to the plot.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: Capitalization is missing in some spots along with periods and commas, but spelling was good.
Interestingness
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: It was moderately interesting, but I suggest you try harder to captivate the reader.
Detail
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: There was not much detail in the story, or as much as we had hoped for.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: You did well in putting the emotion in the story, but some things are missing.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: You fully met the prompt and answered it completely.
Total
Score: 56/70
~~~
Clarity
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Everything was so clear and easy to read. Nothing needed to be changed except one part I didn't quite understand, but other than that I was really impressed.
Uniqueness
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: It was really unique, however, it is occasional for an apprentice to break their leg while in a high, thinning tree.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: I couldn't see any errors in grammar or spelling.
Interestingness
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: I was completely sucked into Rowanpaw's world. You could truly feel and experience everything she was going through, it was amazing. I would love to relive that again.
Detail
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: The amount of detail was astonishing. You could clearly see the setting and how the other characters looked and what Rowanpaw truly loved about FeatherClan.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: You could clearly feel Rowanpaw's anger, pain and enjoyment. You could even detect how other characters felt which is what authors usually leave out.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: Definitely. It is a perfect example of an apprentice breaking his/her leg.
Total
Score: 68/70
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Round 1-D Winner: Sparrowheart838
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ROUND 1-E
Clarity
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: I could clearly see what was going on, but I felt you skipped some key points that would've helped me better understand what was happening. It seemed slightly rushed at the beginning as well, and even at the end when they were giving Clearpaw's ceremony.
Uniqueness
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: I thought it was really cool that instead of StarClan you used LightClan. I've never seen someone do that before. I also liked how Lunar kept her name, and that Winterpaw was pretty much evil for love like Ashfur. I also liked the idea of Winterpaw stuffing the deathberries into the robin to make it more sneaky. I thought it was kind of interesting that you made an apprentice the leader, but at the same time I felt it was odd. I didn't really think that was realistic because 1. wouldn't there be a deputy and 2. why would the Clan look up to a really young leader who was originally an apprentice?
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: There were numerous amounts of spelling errors.
Interestingness
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: I thought it was interesting, especially near the end when Winterpaw was thinking of ways to kill Lunar, but near the beginning I felt you could've added a little but more drama to make it suspenseful and intriguing the whole time rather than having it be a little boring at first and then filled with suspense at the end.
Detail
Score: 4/10
Reasoning: I didn't really pick out any detail except for describing the cats and the dens.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: There was little emotion towards the beginning, but near the end I felt some, but I was expecting to see more grief and betrayal from Clearpaw because Lunar, the cat he loved most, was dead, while the second cat he loved, Winterpaw, had killed her.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Yes. It's a great and unique example of poisoning a cat, however I was hoping for a little bit more effort in detail and emotion.
Total
Score: 47/70
~~~
Clarity
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: The story was clear and very suspenseful. You took your time, making sure it wasn't rushed and you did an excellent job, however, at the beginning of the story, you described the death of Palesplash and the birth of Brokenkit, and you mentioned that Duskstrike saw what happened only three days ago, yet when you went back to the present she was an apprentice? I didn't understand that logic.
Uniqueness
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: I've never read a story where a cat is killed by a viper, except when Honeyfern died, but the amount of uniqueness was really well put. I loved how you made it so Brokenpaw had a broken paw (lol) and how Flamespirit disliked her looks and denied her and Palesplash, instead praising his other kit. It was really cool.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Only a few grammar mistakes.
Interestingness
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: I was fully engulfed into Duskstrike's world. It was fully intriguing and suspenseful how you truly experience everything he was going through.
Detail
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: There was detail, but only with the viper (from what I recall) and not much with the setting.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: The emotion in the story was overpowering. You could completely feel how much Duskstrike hated Flamespirit and how much he wanted to kill him, and how much he truly loved Palesplash and how you felt bad for Brokenpaw. You could even sense the anger and selfishness in Flamespirit, and the betrayed and hurt feelings in Brokenpaw.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: Absolutely. It was clean and clear, not rushed, interesting, and fully breath-taking. Even though it was a short story, the length was perfect and well-done.
Total
Score: 66/70
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Round 1-E Winner: Jamiuee
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ROUND 1-F
Clarity
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: It seems to be a little rushed towards the end and it feels like some things were just randomly tossed in the story with some sentences that were cut too short and some sentences that were too long. Other than some confusing parts, I thought it was pretty clear on what you were aiming for.
Uniqueness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: I think the storm was pretty unique for your given topic. I mean, I didn't exactly expect a visit to the Moonpool to end with a huge fire with a ton of cats dying.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Just a few spelling mistakes and non-words.
Interestingness
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: It's pretty to-the-point and sorta rushed, but it's a pretty good plot with a good amount of detail. I did enjoy it, but I feel it could be rewritten into something much more intriguing.
Detail
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: I felt that there was a good amount of detail, but it's mostly to-the-point. There is some good blotches of detail but some words didn't seem accurate. Other than that, the detail was good.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: It shows good spots of emotion, and what the character is thinking, but not much detail about any of the other characters.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 3/10
Reasoning: I would say no, because it isn't exactly a journey to the Moonpool. It's used as a hiding place, not used for anything related to StarClan, and the story is mostly about the fire and cats dying. The Moonpool was only mentioned briefly.
Total
Score: 43/70
~~~
Clarity
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: It was clean and neat, didn't rush much at all and you could understand what was happening easily.
Uniqueness
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: I liked the scene where Sedgewhisker and Larchtail started to paddle through the water and started making their way to the Moontree. I also liked how both the medicine cat and deputy were swept away by the strong current. I never knew it would end up becoming a visit to the Moontree. I also enjoyed how instead of the Moonpool/stone you did something more original.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Not very many mistakes, but a few spelling and punctuation errors.
Interestingness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: It was very interesting when the leader died and it was a clever plot point when the ice broke and the deputy and medicine cat got swept away by the freezing water, I wasn't expecting that.
Detail
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: I thought you did a really good job with detail. I was hooked the whole time and was fascinated by how the Moontree was described and all the detail put into the frantic escape from the breaking of ice.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: To be honest, I didn't really see any sort of emotion or thought from the characters, only that Sedgewhisker had a snobby attitude and that were scared. I just need a little more emotion.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Yes. For a moment near the beginning and middle of the story I had a feeling that it wouldn't end up being a trip to the Moontree, but it turned out to be that way. I enjoyed how unique you made it.
Total
Score: 50/70
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Round 1-F Winner: LePyriteRose
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ROUND 1-G
Clarity
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: The story was straight to the point and I noticed that it was very rushed. The story was clear on what you were aiming for, but I felt you could've put a lot more effort into it.
Uniqueness
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: I was hoping for something a little more unique. I mean, it's so common for a cat to die in battle in a story, I was hoping for something I wouldn't expect, even some drama, but I did enjoy how you made it so she lost her memory.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: There were frequent spelling errors and grammar errors.
Interestingness
Score: 7/10
Reasoning: I wasn't really clung to the book. It had no sense of the surroundings, let alone I was only introduced to three characters.
Detail
Score: 3/10
Reasoning: I saw no detail except for a very, very small amount of it. I wish there was more so I could really get a feel for the setting and how the characters looked like.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: At the beginning, I didn't sense any emotion, but towards the end I felt the main character's grief, but at the same time I felt you could've done a better job at expressing the emotion.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Yes, however I felt it could be rewritten to something more intriguing.
Total
Score: 43/70
~~~
Clarity
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: The sentences could've been separated better, but you could clearly tell what was going on, however the part where Poppyheart died, I felt it could've been explained more thoroughly because I got confused for a little bit there.
Uniqueness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: It's rare for a cat to die in battle, so I did think it was unique, however I was hoping for something a bit more creative.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Just a one or two punctuation and spelling errors.
Interestingness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: I was fully into the story while reading it. I thought it was really intriguing but I didn't quite understand why they were fighting.
Detail
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: There was a good amount of detail, but I do think you could've added a lot more to make the story more intense.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: The emotion was clear for Fallensand, however I didn't quite read any other emotion from the other characters.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: Absolutely. It showed the pure tragedy of someone you love dying and what your reaction would be to that.
Total
Score: 59/70
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Round 1-G Winner: Jay-and-Ember
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ROUND 1-H
Clarity
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: I felt the story was clear, but I was hoping for a bit more pizzazz. It felt weak at certain points, but overall I could tell what was happening.
Uniqueness
Score: 8/10
Reasoning: I felt it was unique, however it is common for a cat to encounter a fox, and have one cat die, but I felt the way you wrote it was unique.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 9/10
Reasoning: Just a couple spelling and grammar errors.
Interestingness
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: I felt you could've made it much more intriguing. The whole time I was reading I got kind of bored, I wasn't freaking out to know what would happen, and I felt it was kind of bland.
Detail
Score: 4/10
Reasoning: I took no sign of detail, except at the beginning of the story and a little bit near the middle.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: I didn't detect much emotion from the characters except a little bit from Ravenpaw when Glowfern died.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 10/10
Reasoning: Yes, it's a great example of a terrifying, deadly attack, and I liked how you used a fox.
Total
Score: 50/70
~~~
Clarity
Score: 2/10
Reasoning: I found this story to be too hard to follow. It didn't make sense, and lots of things were executed incorrectly. Cats cannot talk to foxes, and I did not think that there was any reason to the story.
Uniqueness
Score: 3/10
Reasoning: There wasn't a lot of unique things about the story, accept for the main character's personality.
Grammar/Spelling
Score: 2/10
Reasoning: Your punctuation was off and all over the place along with capitalization. You used phrases like 'u', which isn't a real word.
Interestingness
Score: 4/10
Reasoning: The story was barely interesting with little plot detail. The main character has a change of heart in the middle of the scene, which threw the story off balance.
Detail
Score: 4/10
Reasoning: There was very little detail in the story.
Emotion/Thought
Score: 6/10
Reasoning: There was a decent amount of emotion in the story, with the fox and on of the friends, just not as much as we had hoped for.
Does it meet the requirements?
Score: 5/10
Reasoning: The prompt does not have a lot centered enough about a vicious attack, it was too short.
Total
Score: 28/70
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Round 1-H Winner: Raven_Da_Music_Kitty
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Sorry to fabio310 Trinriri Thunderclan4Life iiMeepMastehii KrackedP The_Warrior_Writer Silverheart-Chan OliviaSmith491 xX_Water_FirexX, but you were eliminated!
We hope to see you in the next competition!
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