It's really strange to look back on this year and see that so many wonderful things happened, when it was also the year such a tragedy hit my family. But I'd like to think dad would be proud of how, despite everything, my mom, my sister and I stood up and held strong.

In that spirit, I present to you my writing achievements of 2019, so linked to the horrors of the year as they are.

Posting HOT LIKE ICE: although I'd posted the first few chapters in December 2018, this was when HLI started gaining steam with readers and it was very exciting to see their reactions to it.

Started writing MAKE A SCENE: yes, I spent the month of December 2018 and the early portion of January planning this new adventure. I didn't even care that I was still tired from the crazy NaNo marathon, I couldn't wait to start writing the story of our petty queen and her soft boy king.

Mentee selection on WattPairsMentorship: early in the month I get the fantastic news that I've been selected to be mentored in the program. I couldn't be more ecstatic.

Pause from writing: three days later we got the news that dad's cancer had returned and had done metastasis. To say I was overwhelmed with grief is an understatement. But what did I have left to do, aside from losing my mind at random intervals while at work or at home?

Restarted writing MAKE A SCENE: you bet this was my coping mechanism.

Kept going: I was still posting the last portion of HLI, which was by far exceeding all my expectations. At the same time I kept writing MAS with the determination of a freight train.

Participation on WattPairsMentorship: work on HALL OF FAME edits started out this month. I met wonderful people, both fellow mentees and mentors and I was highly motivated. Which was a positive and productive way to keep my spirits up despite the fact that across the ocean, my mom and dad were fighting for dad's life.

Participation on WattPairsMentorship: this is when work got the most intense, since we were only one month away from the final showcase. Fortunately my mentor and I were equally engaged and we became fast friends.

Finished writing MAKE A SCENE: I didn't forget this one. Even while working hard on HOF edits I joined CampNaNoWriMo and reached my goal of finishing our petty queen's tale.

Finished posting HOT LIKE ICE: and I also hit this other milestone. It was a cause for joy in and of itself, and then a shocking thing happened. The hits on my page started rising fast, not just on HLI but on my other stories and my followers count as well. I didn't know what was happening but I certainly wasn't complaining.

Started planning EDGE OF ROMANCE: the first ideas started to coalesce.

Final showcase on WattPairsMentorship: the edited manuscript was posted temporarily so the judges could read it, and although HOF didn't win the competition I was still very happy with the progress we made on it and even more at the friendships I made.

Planning EDGE OF ROMANCE: this started happening in full, which I don't even know how I managed this. That month I had a business trip to an industry conference followed by a trip to spend dad's birthday with him.

Started posting MAKE A SCENE: on my dad's birthday, which was the first one we all spent together in eight years and also the last time we would. I was excited about MAS, especially seeing how well HLI had done and was still doing, but to be honest I didn't think it could surpass HLI.

Started writing EDGE OF ROMANCE: it wasn't terribly hard to start writing this one. The main idea was based on a previous novel I never posted anywhere, but with all new characters. Real life blended a little bit with this one, which was both cathartic and also kind of painful.

Participated in awards: I tried my hand at the Wattys and The Fiction Awards under the slogan of my millennial people: YOLO.

Kept going: 1) still writing EOR, 2) still posting MAS, 3) still watching the hits to my page climb like nobody's business.

Started planning the YA FANTASY: this one was also a complete rewrite of an old novel that no one ever saw, but for some reason it kept banging on my head to force me to pay attention.

The worst news: near the end of the month we get the news that dad isn't going to make it. The doctors estimated that he had two to three weeks left, so my sister and I made travel arrangements. I'll always be thankful about how my managers supported me and my family during that time.

Pause from posting MAKE A SCENE: and I'm also so thankful that my readers understood the situation, supported me and waited for my return.

Pause from writing EDGE OF ROMANCE: yeah.

Finished writing EDGE OF ROMANCE: my sister and I made it in time to spend a couple of weeks with dad. During the first week, when things weren't so bad yet, I'd make it home from the hospital and to decompress I wrote. Somehow I managed to finish the book during that time. Who knows if it's any good, but I guess the readers will tell me.

Continued planning the YA FANTASY: finishing EOR meant I ran out of distractions so I started tackling this project. Why was the old novel so terrible?! Answer: so that I'd have to redo it from scratch.

Nomination for The Fiction Awards: I woke up on a Saturday morning with a feeling that that was the day. Before going to the hospital I checked my phone and saw the email notification that HOF had got a nomination. It was surreal. I couldn't even be happy about it.

It happened: that really was the day dad passed.

Continued posting MAKE A SCENE: towards the end of the month, I needed to bring back some positivity into my life and I restarted my regular posting schedule. The readers really did wait and they poured all of their support for the book.

Mentor selection on WattPairsMentorship: somehow I made it full circle, and now was selected to be a mentor for the upcoming round. How amazing is that?

This is my birthday month and for obvious reasons it wasn't the happiest. But I did get to spend it with mom and some good friends of the family, and I wore a pretty new dress that made me feel kind of princess-y so at least I had that going for me, right?

Hit 1,000 followers: wrong, because I hit this major milestone and WHOA. Whoa. Wowowow. I never thought this would happen. I had been watching my numbers climb steadily during the year, but I still never imagined I would start with 132 followers in January and hit 1k—ever. So to celebrate I made this massive month long party where I gave away critiques and hosted a Discord chat.

Started and finished writing UPCOMING SHORT STORY: I'd had an inkling of an idea for this one for a while, but it hadn't materialized until now. It was a good project to get me restarted writing after the awfulness of August. Plus, it's in an exciting different format, which kept me going despite the fact that I'm notoriously not into short stories.

Continued planning the YA FANTASY: would planning for this ever end? Why was it driving me crazy even though I hadn't put the first word on page yet? Ugh.

Continued posting MAKE A SCENE: the plot twists were rolling and so were the reactions. What a time to be alive.

Mentor's list and whishlists on WattPairsMentorship: cat was out of the bag and it was all official. I couldn't wait to start getting submissions!

Started writing the YA FANTASY: at long last, or so I thought. Pretty soon I realized that writing this one was going to be tough. Every chapter took twice as long as usual (jury's still out on the reasons behind that). As if that weren't bad enough, once I wrote like five chapters I realized that this book wasn't a standalone. I screamed and it wasn't necessarily in joy.

Finished posting MAKE A SCENE: what a bittersweet feeling. This one blew my previous records out of the park, setting a dangerous precedent of giving me expectations. We don't want that. Marianna and expectations don't mesh well.

NaNoWriMo with the YA FANTASY: why? But also why not? I mean, did I have anything better to do this month? No. So I got to work, and even though yes, every damn chapter was still like pulling teeth, I persevered and won NaNo close to the nick of time. In the process I made really good progress on the book and was able to plan the remainder of the chapters I'd have to write during December.

Mentee selection on WattPairsMentorship: there was a lot of running around like headless chicken for a bit. It was marvelous.

Became a Wattpad Star: whaaaaat? How? Of all the surprises this year, this one was the most unexpected and wildest. Especially as three of my favorite people also became Stars at the same time. I'm still kind of reeling from this one.

Mentees announced on WattPairsMentorship: and off to work we go!

Started posting EDGE OF ROMANCE: this is my first New Adult book on Wattpad and I'm excited to see how it goes, but also nervous to see how it goes. Does that make sense? Who cares, I'm a ball of feelings about this one.

Finished writing the YA FANTASY: HAHAHAHAHA YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO DEFEAT ME? HA! HAAAAA!! (Feel free to take this as confirmation that I have lost my mind).

It's been an eventful year and I'm definitely glad I stayed busy all throughout. That's a big portion of what helped me endure the vicissitudes my family went through. Looking back, all that hard work is also what helped me grow my audience and reach for the Stars (geddit?).

If I've learned another thing from 2019 is that whatever is going to happen, is going to happen. While I'll continue to work hard in 2020, I'll also free myself of any expectations of how things should go to please me. I can't control how things develop.

The only thing I know is that I have a lot of ideas to tackle next to stay busy in 2020, which is poised to be the Year of New Adult Books From Marianna. Hope you stay tuned for that!

Thank you all for your incredible support this year, it means the world to me and I'll never forget it. Happy New Year 2020!