guys i said i was gonna update two days ago but then seventeen hit me with that part switch ver. of pretty u and i think i was mad that morning but then i saw that and i couldnt stop smiling the entire day because i saw little previews on tumblr a few days before and i knew that shit was coming and then it was just a seventeen day. whoops they make me forget my responsibilities.

42. DEPRESSED, STRESSED, KPOP OBSESSED pt. 1

(i may double update because i know that not eVERYONE will relate to this because not eVERYONE listens to kpop or reads kfics like ik ik ik so yeah)

SOOOooOooOo AS WE ALL know, I have been getting into k-pop. I'm not as deep in as others are (like years and years of k-pop), but I know a decent amount of groups to say that I can write this chapter. But give it a few months. I'll practically be speaking korean fuck with me.

future editing mackenzie: .. YIKES.

If you also know me, you know that I barely read fanfiction. But I was sitting and thinking of things and I was really bored and depressed (lmfao when am i ever depressed) and thinking... k-pop fanfics? What are the clichés, what is the norm for k-fics (use this term now because I came up with it and idc if people said it before give me damn credit)?

So I go to the k-pop tag, and I go to the reading lists and I study and I do my work. I read EXO imagines, BTS imagines, basically every freaking imagine that is possible for male k-pop groups anD SOME I THOROUGHLY ENJOYED.. Others were.. alright.

I also would like to thank proudsonearmy , because this wonderful person literally pulled out the fics on me like a month or so ago, and gave me great fics, good fics, bad fics, and horrible ones. I'm not giving no names because I'm a lowkey messy bitch.

SOOO LETS GET READY TO RUMMMBBLLLEEEEEEEE.

EXO K-FICS:

First of all, before I even begin, I would like to say that most of the popular fanfics I found are of guys who aren't even in the group anymore. I know you're like wTFFF but I'm not even kidding. Luhan and Kris were the most prominent ones I found and I honestly wasn't surprised because some of these kfics were very, very old. So I can't blame them.

But, the more recent ones I found were mainly surrounding Sehun and Baekhyun and Chanyeol. All very fucking hOt bitch I'm not gonna deny. Someone told me that everyone looOoOooOoOooOooved them a lot, so I can understand why they have so many freaking kfics. Not saying that there shouldnt be more about the others (where are the chen fics I found like one c'mon now get it together), but there is just more about them than the others. Let us start.

MY FIRST FUCKING PROBLEM IS THE GODDAMN TITLES. LIKE 40% OF THEM START OFF WITH "In A Relationship With..", "In Love With..", "Loving..", or "Hating..". WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK THEY ARENT FUCKING DISTINGUISHABLE AT ALL. FIRST OF MY PROBLEMS.

Another thing is, they either have a fucking reverse Heirs plot-line or they're fantasy novels. I'll elaborate.

The MC (Who's name is typically on the gist of "Kim So Eun") has really rich fucking parents and she lives in Seoul, South Korea.

Sounds fucking familiar? BECAUSE IT'S EVERY FUCKING KDRAMA I SWEAR.

So, she is in an arranged marriage (also sounds familiar) and hates the guy who she is with, who is typically another EXO member. Now, we have struck another pothole you guys.

If I was with any fucking EXO member, fucking marrying him, I would jump for joy. I would cry. I would scream. I would cry and scream. I would ride his dick every moment I could.

Yeah, they're all hot.

SO WHY IS SHE COMPLAINING IM CONFUSED?

She throws a fucking fit and decides that she is going to move to another part of Korea, and that she is going to live with one of her friends. Sehun's sister. Baekhyun's mom. Kai's baby mama. I don't freaking knoow man.

So yeah she gets to know him or whatever and it's awkward man, it's really fucking awkward because she lives with a member of his family or his girlfriend or something. I don't know she basically breaks girl code in these because she ends up sleeping with that member.

WHILE SHE IS ENGAGED TO ONE OF THE OTHER MEMBERS LIKE IM FREAKING CONFUSED.

Or it's a fantasy novel - and it's on the lines of vampires and demons and sparkly Taehyungs. Through these, I have a permanent derp face. I haven't finished one of these so I can't elaborate on them. So yeh.

But from what I know, it's basically Diabolik Lovers. AND LOOKING BACK IT'S LITERALLY DIABOLIK LOVERS.

SHE LOSES HER HOME, GETS ROPED INTO A NEW HOME WITH LIKE 9 GUYS (EXO) AND THEY'RE ALL VAMPIRES OOHH. AND ITS BASICALLY A REVERSE HAREM WITH BAEKHYUN AND SEHUN FIGHTING OVER HER AND MY BABY CHEN IS BACKGROUND NOISE ):

Where are my Chen lovers at like I seriously just love little smol bean Chen. That is all. Next.

BTS K-FICS:

YOONMIN, GUYS. YOONMIN FICS FUCKING EVERYWHERE. YOU'RE YOONMIN TRASH. I'M YOONMIN TRASH. WE ARE ALL FUCKING YOONMIN FUCKING TRASH.

I would say beware, but that would make it seem like I'm mad about it lol not at all guys not at freaking all. This is a good thing.

So it's either Yoonmin or Jikook. Now, I haven't even bothered to look at a non-BL fanfic of BTS, so I will go off of these ehehhe I told you guys I am consistent Yaoi Trash there will never be a time when I'm not Yaoi Trash.

Now, one thing I can say about these stories is that there's never a love triangle. Well, I can't say that for all of them, but in the ones I read, it was just Yoongi and Jimin. Not that I'm mad lol let a bitch ruin my ship.

I will sink with this ship I swear.

But as I progressively read these stories, I realized that most of them have the concept of this: They are best friend neighbors and they discover their feelings for each other but try to keep it on the DL because their parents don't approve.

Not to mention, one of them is typically low-middle class AND THE OTHER ONE IS A RICH ASS MF LIKE HOW DOES THAT WORK SOMEONE TELL ME.

So it just progresses with them hiding their feelings for each other but lowkey kisses and jacking each other off (not seriously omg) and it's all cute and adorable or whatever and they have to deal with their parents because they thought they was lowkey but they weren't.

By the way, it's mostly the rich guy's parents. Like they "already had to stay in this sad neighborhood thanks to their son and now their son wants to be with a low class person" like no fuck that you people are bitches fuck you fuck your parents fuck your parent's parents fuck.

FUUCCCKKKK.

Though, there are of course fics about the other amazing, dorky members of BTS. Regular ones; not Yaoi. But where can you go wrong with Yaoi honestly. Hehe.

I only had time to read one (it was about Jin), and I didn't want to categorize them by their titles or guess what they were about because of their descriptions, so I couldn't talk about those ): Sorry.

Plus I still don't even feel write about this rant because I didn't read one for 60% of the members like I did with the others because I didn't really have timmee I'm mega uber sorry. bUT WRITE IN THE COMMENTS THE CLICHÉS YOU SEE IN STORIES FOR EACH OF THEM?

SEVENTEEN K-FICS:

*Looks at my PFP* If you know me, you know that I have recently had a SVT obsession. Seriously. Help. Send fucking help I think I'm falling in love with too many boys. I'm gonna need my own TLC show in just a few minutes.

"My Polygamous Relationship". Yup, fitting.

But, to start off, these are more like Wonwoo and Mingyu fanfics. Don't get me wrong, I am majorly in love with both of them and I can SORTA (no i literally cannot) understand why they have the most k-fics, but wHERE ARE MY OTHER BOYS?

I mean, I really tried to find one for each of them, one that was super good, but it was very hard omg. Didn't even find one I liked for like 4 of them. I WAS SUPER SURPRISED THAT I DIDN'T FIND ONE FOR S.COUPS HONESTLY BECAUSE EVERYONEE LOVEESS HIIMM.

The ones I did find where mainly just those ones that are kind of like the Kik 5SOS fanfiction stories that everyone loves but literally makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. Those literally go like this:

luke_is_a_dick_sucker: Hi

iggyarzaylea: omg who is this

luke_is_a_dick_sucker: Malum is real bye

iggyarzaylea: um whut

luke_is_a_dick_sucker: Wanna date

iggyarzaylea: sure but what is malum

luke_is_a_dick_sucker: BITCH BYE

Yup. Welcome to Wattpad. Enjoy your stay, but you probably won't.

Honestly I'm surprised that my account hasn't been reported a lot lmfao I bash Wattpad all the damn time in this book and in my MB I should be receiving an email shortly.

Or the roommate ones. Honestly, these are really common in fanfiction and basically anywhere on Wattpad and I seriously don't understand why she doesn't fuck him or why she spontaneously hates him or something bECAUSE LET ME TELL YOU.

If Vernon was my roommate, I would mount him every night. I'm not kidding. He's technically legal so jokes on Korea with those damn Korean ages getting my hopes up and shit but in actuality they're a year younger in America than they are in Korea.

So hahahaha. Jokes on u. He legal bitches. You'll never pull one on me.

THE CONCLUSION

Understand, though, that these are not even a majority of the k-fics for these groups. Lmfao I'm a busy bitch it took time for me to even read one for each and even still I couldn't finish them all and had to skim through them and could barely comment. So, of course, these are not all of k-clichés (((: DONT JUDGE ME

But mostly, if these stories don't follow the typical clichés for their group, it all just falls under reverse harem.

Like, she was best friends with Jimin and Suga/Xiumin/DK or something and they met the other guys and formed their respective groups and it's basically Love and K-Pop because they all fall in love with her as they rise to fame and it gets complicated because they all try to keep her out of the lime light and yeah she goes on tour with them and everything and it's all sweet or whatever.

Basically, it's Uta no Prince-sama; live action and Korean. Prepare yourselves.

BUT YEAH IF YOU SEE THIS TYPE OF SHIT HAPPENING WITH LOOKALIKES FROM K-POP GROUPS, GRAB YOUR BEER AND POPCORN AND WATCH THE SHOW BECAUSE HOT GUYS AND REVERSE HAREM-

Ahem- I mean. Because it's Cliché.

-

more groups i should talk about bc there may be a part two?(BOY GROUPS BC I SWEARR I ALREADY HAVE A CHAPTER PLANNED FOR GIRL GROUPS)

im literally just putting out rants to make up for the next few weeks.

in the past few days i have become absolute NCT 127 trash oh my good. mark is my bias like he is a cute smol bean, and his laughs and giggles and half wheeze/half snorts are so adorable. pLUS HE IS A BADASS RAPPER LIKE TAKE A LONG ASS RIDE INTO MY PUSSY MARK.

.. he is underage i should be ashamed of myself im a pervert.