The next hour or so sped by in a blur of voices and of faces alight with an excitement that both irritated and unnerved me.

The evening meal was prepared and eaten, something which only added to the uplifted mood of the group when they realised that we had the spoils of the Lancaster House raid to feast on, albeit sparingly. It never failed to surprise me how simple tins of mackerel and tins of potatoes could make it seem like we were eating a feast worthy of the Hogwarts Great Hall. No one gave much of a shit now about Michelin Star restaurants when something like tinned fish seemed like such a luxury. 

Afterwards, with satisfied smiles on everyone's faces, the chatter among the group was unmistakably different to the usually sombre atmosphere. I stayed out of the conversations as much as I could, preferring to sit at the side, watching as people did what they always did around Tom – gravitate towards him, seeking out his company, wanting to chat to the man who could hold a whole room in his thrall.

Lena, on the other hand, still wasn't receiving such a warm welcome, but Taj spent some time with her, his face serious as they talked quietly away from the others. When he eventually moved away, she was left on her own, just as I was. 

I'd never wanted to get away so much and seek solace in my own company. Looking at them all made my chest tighten, bones crunching inwards, pushing the air out of my lungs. I was just considering trying to slip out unseen, when I heard the creak of the chair next to me. Looking up from where I was seated on the floor, I smiled weakly as Ivy rubbed at her knees, her face grimacing at her aching joints.

'Arthritis playing up again?' I asked.

'Again?' Ivy harrumphed and pursed her lips. 'Always, girl, always. These old bones like to tell me often how much they hate it down here in these damn tunnels. They always complaining at me. I think they'd quite like to see the sun one more time, you know?'

I frowned. 'We'll get you out of here, Ivy. You'll see the sun again.'

It had been too long since Ivy had been topside. Too long since she'd felt the kiss of the sun on her skin.

She chuckled, the laughter turning into a cough that crackled too much for my liking.

'Girl, you're living in a dream world, you know. Coming down is always easier than going up and coming down here was not easy for an old songbird like me. Uh-huh. Not easy at all.' She sighed. 'All I can do now is take the sunshine where I can get it. Iza over there got the sunshine in her smile, yeah? Vik got the sunshine in his crocodile stories. Young Lewis still got the sunshine even though he needs to wash his face more often.'

I smiled, pulling at a loose thread on the edge of a new hole in my jeans, knowing I'd have to loot myself some new clothes at some point soon before they all fell apart.

'And then there's you,' she said, her relentless gaze resting on me. 'The girl who got more sunshine than the rest of them put together.'

I hated it when she did this and loved it at the same time. It was dangerous to care in the New World. Dangerous to get attached. Yet, Ivy had this way about her, and you just couldn't help it. I bathed in it for a bit, letting it wash over me, needing something to hold onto. Something to pull me out of this dark well of despair and desperation that seemed intent on drowning me.

Ivy leaned forward slightly, the best she could with a back that didn't care much for her bending down.

'So, where is it, child? Where's your sunshine now, eh?'

I swallowed. 'I don't know what you mean.'

Sucking on her teeth, Ivy nodded over to where Tom was, having been commandeered into lively conversation with Iza, Janey and Lewis.

'He's quite something, that young man of yours. Quite the speaker. Reminds me of my old pastor. Got that gift of the gab, you know? Let me tell you something, that man didn't even need to prepare his sermon. He'd get up in front of that congregation and bam...' 

She clapped her palms together, prompting a few people to look our way, including Tom. 

'I swear, it was like he channelled the power of the Lord right through him. He'd open his mouth and out it would flow. All the sunshine. All the love. All the wisdom. I miss that man. Your Tom, he got that, girl. He got the gift.'

'He does,' I said, biting on my lip. The hole was bigger now, my fingers working tirelessly on the thread. 'H-he was a teacher. A great teacher, actually. The kids all loved him. Everyone loved him.'

'Hmm,' pondered Ivy. 'I can see why. What I don't see, is your sunshine. You got that man over there. No doubt you thought you would never see that face again and yet here he is. That sun should be blinding me now, so where is it, girl?'

I looked over at the Grey again, the one who wore the face of my husband. The face he had stolen. The one I never thought I'd see again.

'I'm just...' I paused. 'I'm just overwhelmed, I guess. It's all been a bit too much. The mission to Lancaster House. Seeing him again. The fall.' I touched a hand to my head. 'It hurts.'

God, it hurt. It hurt so much.

I blinked back the tears threatening to appear and smiled in a way that felt more like a grimace. I'm sure it must have looked that way to Ivy, who reached over and lifted my chin, turning my head to the side a little so she could take a closer look.

She sniffed. 'You've been in the wars a lot lately, Evie, girl. You make sure you drop by the dispensary in the morning and get something for the pain. Something tells me it ain't done with you yet. Must have been some fall, eh?'

A shadow fell over us, blocking out some of the light.

Tom.

'Are you okay?' His eyes found mine, brimming with fake concern.

Like you care. You're just worried I might finally crack and spill over.

'This girl of yours needs some rest, young man,' Ivy said, pushing herself out of her chair with a groan and resisting Tom's offer to help her to her feet. Once standing, she clasped his hand in both of hers, staring intently at him as she looked up into his face.

'Tom, this is Ivy,' I said. 'Ivy Henderson. Ivy, this is Tom.'

Not Tom. Not bloody Tom.

'Oh, I know, child. I know who he is.' She leaned closer to him, narrowing her eyes and for a moment I held my breath, wondering if she could see things the others couldn't. 'Hello Tom, pleased to meet you.'

He smiled Tom's smile and I hated him so much.

'Pleased to meet you too,' he said. 'Izabela over there tells me you're the resident guardian angel of the group.'

Ivy raised her grey brows, wrinkles stretching and smoothing out the soft skin around her eyes. 'Resident nurse. Resident therapist. Resident drug dealer, but not the good stuff, you know?' She winked and squeezed his hand. 'Not so sure about the guardian angel thing though. If I was, then your wife here wouldn't get into so many scrapes. Her head is too pretty to have so many bumps and bruises. Hopefully, now you're here, you can stop her from getting any more, what do you think, huh?'

Tom looked at me, and I wanted him to stop. I couldn't bear it when he looked at me like that. It was too hard. Too much like the Tom in my memories.

'I think there's nothing I want more than that,' he said.

I hate you. I smiled back.

Ivy nodded and winked at me. 'Hear that, girl? This boy here is going to keep you out of trouble from now on. Maybe I won't have to sew you up so much, which is good news for my supplies. I'm running out of surgical thread thanks to you.'

'In that case, I'll try not to darken your door too much from now on.'

'Darken my door?' Ivy's face lit up. 'That is something you could never do. Now, you remember what I said about the sunshine, yeah?'

'Evie! Tom!'

Abby appeared by Tom's side, grasping his arm and making him flinch, although she seemed not to notice as she grinned at us both with as much dazzle as a one-hundred-and-fifty-watt bulb.

'What's got you in such a tizzy all of a sudden, Abigail?' 

Ivy always had a habit of calling her Abigail, something which I knew the other woman liked, even if she never admitted it, because it always brought a warm smile to her face.

'Ivy,' Abby said, almost breathless as if she'd been running. 'I need to borrow Evie and Tom, if you don't mind.'

'Oh, I don't mind at all.' Ivy shrugged but looked at Tom with a hint of regret at the thought of letting him go. 'Borrow away.'

'Great!' Abby said, reaching out to grab my hand. 'Come on, you two, we have a surprise for you!'

Puzzled, and with a sense of dread at having to go anywhere with Tom, I said my goodbyes to Ivy, noting a few sheepish grins being aimed in my direction from some of the others as I followed Abby out of the main room. With the Grey not far behind, we trailed behind her through the maze of narrow corridors until we finally rounded the corner.

Standing outside one of the rooms previously crammed full of old TFL junk – mostly files of yellowing paperwork from the year dot and broken furniture – Gav was leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest and a mischievous smirk on his face.

'Hey, hey, hey,' he said when he saw us coming his way. 'I hope you appreciate this. I swear I almost pulled a hamstring lifting shit out of this room.'

I slowed as I approached him. 'What on earth are you talking about?' I said. 'What have you been doing?'

Abby stood by the door, her hand gripping the handle, a huge grin plastered across her face. I swear, I hadn't seen her this excited since we'd run amok in a deserted Harrods and she'd cursed all the rich bastards who'd stepped over her when she'd been living on the streets.

'Mr. and Mrs. Morgan, may we present to you...' Turning the handle, she pushed open the door, letting it swing wide. 'The honeymoon suite!'

Gav pressed a hand each to the small of our backs and guided us to the doorway, before standing just between us from behind and throwing an arm around both our shoulders.

'Sir... madame... we trust it's to your liking...' he said, in a mock-posh voice.

'And if it isn't...' Abby said. 'Tough shit 'cos it's all we have available at short notice.'

They both let off peals of loud laughter that echoed down the corridor, bouncing off the walls and my skull, making me wince.

'Go on, then,' Gav said, giving us both a shove forward.

Horrified, but desperately trying not to show it, I stepped into the small room, with Tom shuffling in awkwardly beside me. On the floor, a sleeping bag had been opened up fully and laid upon what looked like some old large sofa cushions that had clearly seen better days. Another sleeping bag had been placed on top and dotted around the room, tealights flickered lazily.

Oh god. Oh, my fucking god.

They'd done this for us. They'd come down here and cleaned out this room, just to turn it into some kind of make-shift love nest for me and my long-lost husband. For me and Tom.

For me and the Grey.

I didn't know what to do. Didn't know what to say. Fuck, I could barely risk taking a breath in fear that it would prompt me to throw up right on the bed they'd made for us.

Abby touched a hand to my arm, and I did my best to keep it together as I turned to look at her, a shaky tight smile the best I could muster.

'Okay,' she said, still grinning. 'So, it's hardly a five-star hotel and there definitely won't be room service, but it's far enough away from the rest of us that we won't hear a thing. And I swear, I'll make sure the perv here stays away from the door and doesn't try and listen in.' She thumbed a gesture at Gav, who held up his hands as if to say what-the-fuck.

'Oh, and before I forget,' she said, reaching into her back-jean pocket and grabbing hold of Tom's hand, she thrust a small black box into his palm. 'We might be overrun with little grey men out there, but better not risk little human ones down here.'

Gav slapped Tom on the shoulder. 'Eh, bro, those things are hard to come by, so while I'm sure you two have a lot of catching up to do, you might want to make them last, yeah?'

With that, both Abby and Gav left the room, Abby wiggling her eyebrows at me as she closed the door behind them, leaving Tom and I standing there, staring down at the box of condoms that sat on his open palm.

The seconds ticked by painfully and still we kept looking at the glossy box, me with wide eyes of horror and his narrowed with confusion, as if he was rummaging through those memory banks again, trying to work out just what the Hell it was that Abby had given him.

When the penny finally dropped, his mouth dropped open too, his cheeks flushing furiously.

'Uh...' he began.

'Shut up,' I hissed out the whisper, checking to make sure the door was closed properly before snatching the box from his hands and throwing it into the corner of the room. 'If you even think that's happening you can bloody well think again.'

'I wasn't...'

I turned on him, poking a finger into his chest. 'I'll pretend out there that I'm your wife. I'll smile and nod at all the right times, say all the right things, go along with your crazy fucked-up plan, and yeah, I'll even share this room with you if I have to. But that's where I draw the line.'

I stepped closer, eyeballing him before letting my gaze sweep down his body and back up again with disgust. 'I promise you now, if you even think of touching me, if you even think to try it on with me, I will cut that damn thing off between your legs before you even remember what the Hell it is you're meant to do with it.'

Tom swallowed, eyes widening, panic flaring in his expression. 'I wasn't planning on doing anything with it, I swear.'

His hands moved instinctively in front of him, as if he was suddenly very aware of how much it would hurt if I came good on my threat. His face had paled noticeably, colour draining from it as quick as the smile appeared on mine, thin and wicked with intent.

'Good,' I said, glancing over at the makeshift bed. 'And the bed's mine, by the way.'

I walked over to it, plonking myself down on the thin sleeping bag, making sure that I was facing him so that I could keep an eye on his every move. Abby and Gav might have had plans for us in this room, but I wasn't even going to close my eyes and sleep, let alone anything else.

Tom stood, floundering by the door.

'Where am I meant to sleep?' he said.

'Think of it as our first marital disagreement, dear husband,' I said.

Grabbing one of the cushions out from under the bag, I tossed it at his feet.

'You're sleeping on the floor tonight.'