Riley

Refraction. Noun. [ri-frak-shuhn]. The change in the direction of a wave due to a change in its medium of transmission.

"Order up!" Lucy calls through A Pizza the Action and a grubby little kid with a gut that rivals his dad's beer belly runs up to the counter to retrieve it.

He looks at the pizza like I look at a bowl of Dutch chocolate ice cream. We meet again, lover.

I turn back to the stainless steel table in the kitchen and cover the dough with a thick layer of homemade pizza sauce. That's right, I've been promoted from dishwasher to pizza assembler. I'm basically living the dream. I sprinkle mozzarella cheese on top and resist the urge to sneak a handful in my mouth. I pass the pizza to Ronald who sticks it into the oven.

"Slow day, huh?"

I turn around to see Lucy leaning against the table, her cheeks red thanks to the heat of the kitchen.

"You can say that again."

I peel the latex gloves off of my hands and toss them on the table. Tuesday mornings aren't exactly prime time for pizza sales. It's so hot in here that my apron is sticky as I strip it off and toss it in the dirty laundry. Finally. Today's my half-day off, and I have plans.

"I need some ice cream," Lucy says, untying her apron and skipping over to the refrigerator. "What do you say?"

"I never say no to ice cream," I answer. Maybe it'll help me cool down so I don't look like an over ripened tomato.

She pulls out a carton of chocolate chip cookie dough and scoops us generous bowls. I grab a couple of spoons and we sneak out the back door to sit on the steps. The sun beats down on my face and I lift my chin up to let it soak into my skin.

"So, big plans for the afternoon off?" Lucy asks, shoveling a huge spoonful into her mouth. "Hanging out with Ross again?"

I feel a smile work its way across my face. "Yeah."

We've only hung out every afternoon or morning I've had off for the past two weeks. If I'm honest, Ross has become the focal point of my summer. When I'm not spending time with him, I'm thinking about him or texting him or wishing I were making out with him. I didn't know a single person could consume someone like Ross has consumed me.

"Oh gosh, you've got it bad. You look like me after Earnest's and my first summer together."

I comb my hair so it covers my reddening face. "So, uh, you and Earnest..."

Lucy elbows me with a tinkling laugh. "Don't change the subject. Are you guys getting serious?"
"What do you mean serious? We aren't even dating. I mean, we kind of are, but not really," I blabber, shutting myself up with a spoonful of ice cream. "We're not serious."

Lucy shrugs her slender shoulders, a sparkle in her dark eyes. "Of course not. You only spend like every waking moment together."

"It's just a fling."

I'm not stupid. I know summer flings don't last, so I can't expect this thing with Ross to endure past these next two months. No matter what I want, nothing about this is serious. Ross is a distraction, only a distraction, from my life that's falling apart at the seams. If it weren't for Ross, I would spend all my time complaining about being stuck on this island and trying to create a plan for my downward spiraling life. Now, I get to spend my time making out with a hot lifeguard and hanging out on the beach.

"Sure it is. Keep telling yourself that, Riles."

I glare at Lucy and consider throwing ice cream at her, but I can't let it go to waste. It's not like I even have a choice about whatever Ross and I have. He'll stay here on the island and go back to working at a warehouse and I'll go somewhere and do something that's supposed to lead to a 8-5 soul-crushing career. We can't have a future, no matter what we want.

"Yeah, well, I know what Ross and I are and what we're not. And right now, we are going on a date. I'll see you later."

I hop off of the step and stop by the kitchen to leave my bowl and spoon behind. Then I add an extra layer of deodorant, grab my travel memento of the day, and jog out the door towards the beach. Over the weekend, we swam with dolphins while the sun rose. Before that, we went crabbing on the pier. I don't even care what we do today; Ross has convinced me. This island is awesome if only because it produced him.

I jog through the crosswalk, offering a wave and a smile at the guy in the pick up truck who beeps at me, and sprint up the steps that lead over the sand dune to the beach. I skid to a stop at the top of the dune and search the beach for Ross. I don't notice the sea gulls careening across the sky or the whitecaps floating towards the beach. I only see the guy with the dirty blonde curls and white glinting smile leaning against the lifeguard stand.

Ross sees me at the same time that I see him, and he waves to me. I jog across the beach, feet sinking into the sand as I go. I dodge a few kids playing paddleball and narrowly avoid tripping over a cooler filled with disguised beer cans.

"Hey," I call out as I slow to a stop in front of him.

"Hey, Ry," he says, reaching for my hands and tugging me against him.

I grin against his lips as he pulls me to him, one hand splayed across my stomach and the other knotted in my hair.

"Hey," I whisper when his mouth separates from mine.

"Hey," he repeats, a grin climbing up one corner of his mouth and displaying the deep dimple in his cheek.

"Well, now that we've all said hello..."

I force my gaze away from Ross as he slings one arm over my shoulder. Javier stands a few feet away, arms crossed and a knowing smirk on his bronzed face.

"Hey, Javier."

"Don't act like you're happy to see me." Javier laughs, resting one hand on the life preserver strapped to his back. "I'm here to take over for Montgomery, so he's all yours."

I reach for Ross's hand where it rests on my shoulder and squeeze it. "So are you ready?"
He chuckles under his breath. "Someone's eager."

"Nah, I just want to get away from Javier." I wink at Ross's best friend and Javier laughs and shakes his head, climbing onto the lifeguard chair.

"I'm a fly on the wall," he calls down. "Take your time."

"I'm ready," Ross says, tucking a stray strand of hair behind my ear. "Hang on, I have to grab something."

He searches in the shadows beneath the chair for a few minutes and emerges with a smile on his face and two snorkeling masks and flipper sets in hand.

"Snorkeling? Seriously?"

"Let me guess," he says, falling into step behind me, our arms rubbing as we walk. "You've snorkeled at the Great Barrier Reef so this can't even compare."

I can't help but grin. Am I really that much of a snob? "Yeah, but the company's better."

Ross laughs and rests his arm around my shoulders. This. This feeling of Ross's arm around me and the sun on our shoulders and the wonder of new discoveries. This is what I want home to mean. It's this sense of belonging where I am in this exact moment. This is what I've always wanted to find.

"What if we run into a poisonous jellyfish and I have to resuscitate you?"

"Are you trained in CPR and First Aid?"

"No, but I'm great at mouth-to-mouth."

Ross clutches a hand to his chest. "What a relief."

We leave the part of the beach where the tourists congregate and walk across the white sand towards the no-swim area. Pros to dating a lifeguard: we can swim wherever we want. I pull off my tank top, revealing my maroon monokini while Ross strips off his t-shirt. It takes all my willpower to keep my gaze from lingering too long on Ross's sculpted abs and defined muscles. As I reach for the button to slip off my shorts, I remember what's hidden in my back pocket.

I fish out my piece of the trade from my pocket before discarding the jean shorts in the sand. Over our last few adventures, the pieces of my past that I've shown Ross have grown more and more personal. I began by showing him generic souvenirs, but now--now I'm showing him some of myself as well as where I've been.

"So, before this gets water-stained, I thought I'd show it to you," I say, slipping the faded photograph into Ross's hand.

Ross squints as the sun hits his face, studying the picture in front of him. Dad visited Hill Air Force Base in Idaho for a few days for some meetings when I was six, and for once, Dad invited Mom and me to join him. I'd always thought of Utah as this barren red dirt state, but we we stayed in barracks right outside of Great Salt Lake.

The pictures shows Mom and I floating in the water, and I can hear my dad's deep laughter as he takes the shot. My hair spreads around me in a strawberry blonde halo and I'm trying to make the water version of a snow angel while Mom watches me, eyes adoring. We look like a happy family.

Ross regards the picture for a moment, his ocean eyes softening. "Where are you?"

"Utah, believe it or not. Great Salt Lake. It's so salty that you float if you swim in it."

He gestures at my mom, and I notice the way her auburn hair is down instead of swept up in a tight chignon. She looks young and relaxed and free, a woman I scarcely remember. "She looks like you."

I lean on Ross's shoulder and gaze at the picture. "Yeah, I guess she kind of does. Back then, before she got a stick up her butt."

Ross shoves me away with a laugh, setting the photo on top of my pile of discarded clothes. "Aren't you a sweetheart."

He tosses me the snorkeling mask and I strap it to my face, my nose pinched. Then I sit on the beach, sand wedging itself up my butt crack, and pull the rubbery flippers onto my feet. I struggle to my feet, nearly falling over from the awkward ensemble.

"How do I look?" I ask in a nasally voice, splaying one leg in the air.

"Smoking hot," Ross answers, his voice distorted so he sounds like he just sucked helium. I try to stifle my giggle. It's hard to take the compliment seriously when he sounds like a clown.

We waddle towards the water as happy as a pair of penguins, and Ross dives into the waves ahead of me, the flippers propelling him forward. I follow him and we paddle past the breaking waves to the open ocean.

"Here," Ross calls to me, motioning me deeper into the water. "Check out these red hake."

I follow him, wondering if red hake are fish or algae or some weird type of reef. I paddle towards him and see a school of long, sharp finned red fish. I squeal through my snorkel and flail backwards as one swims right beneath me. The school of fish scatters and they dart away from us and head deeper out to sea.

There's no way I'm letting one of those slimy little monsters touch me.

As I desperately try to swim away from the fish, Ross catches my arm and stops me, slipping his goggles around his neck. "Ry, what are you doing?"

"This is--those fish are creepy. Is this supposed to be fun? Because I'm not having fun."

Ross laughs at me and paddles closer, slipping his arms around my waist. "C'mon, this is fun. You can't think too much about it; just trust the water and float, and the fish won't bother you."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. Trust me."

Ross offers me his hand and pulls me deeper out to sea.