17. "Where Do We Stand?"
Esme and Thor made the long journey home in the wee late hours of the night. The two weren't exhausted by any means. Esme's heart thundered in her chest, replaying the kiss in her head multiple times. She had been the one to make the move, not him. It had been the total opposite of their very first kiss, one that to this day, she could still recall very clearly.
~*~
Esme understood why Thor favored Earth at times. Jane Foster had a hold on him. It wasn't possessive, it wasn't abusive, it was...she wanted to deem it as some sort of love.
So Esme was very confused as she realized Thor was trying to make a move to kiss her.
"What do you think you're doing?" Esme snapped, putting her hands to the god's chest before he could go any further. "You and Jane Foster are together, aren't you? I thought you were better than this."
Though she half expected a piggish remark, instead she got from Thor, "I suppose I'm not thinking this through."
"Care to explain?"
"Yes, Jane and I were together. However, recently, things have seemed...out of touch. It didn't make sense at first, since I couldn't figure out why. I thought it was because we're from different worlds, literally. I've come to realize it's not really that at all."
"Then what is it?"
"Jane feels stronger about our relationship than I do. She's more involved with it. When the Bifrost went, it put things on...ice. Being together with her again made me realize just how weak our relationship had gotten. It made me realize how...how much you and I have gotten to know each other."
Esme wasn't sure what to do. What could she say? She'd felt inklings of something, but she hadn't ever experienced it before. Not even when she was a little girl. This was a new beast, one she couldn't kill.
"And you're absolutely sure you know what you're talking about right now?" Esme asked him firmly.
"I do. Please, stop me, before I make this moment awkward." Thor chuckled nervously.
"You made it awkward when you tried to kiss me." Esme yanked on a strand of Thor's stringy hair. "Read the signs, Thor. Listen to them."
"I am. I'm listening to you. In all this time we've talked...you haven't said your feelings on the matter."
Thor had a valid point on that. The conversation was, so far, only about his feelings. She had yet to voice hers. Are there any to voice? she wondered. Sure, she and the God of Thunder had spent more time together, from the time he had heeded her help in the grassy fields of Asgard to help find the truth about Loki. It seemed from that time on, she somehow found her way back into his life in some capacity, just as he had done the same.
Esme thought back to all the times she had been with Thor, and any times that she could recall she had thought about him. It had taken some time for her to allow him back into her life. The abandonment from childhood had coated her for many years, it had taken a great deal of time to chip away at the bitter feeling.
A lot had changed since they were children. They grew up. They developed their own paths, paths that eventually crossed. And now here they were, an Asgardian Prince standing before a guard of the Asgardian prison. Two friends—
Esme's mind came to a screeching halt at that word. Friends. This was where they had planted themselves for all this time. And now, Thor was searching for something more. He thought he found something more, with Esme.
"Esme?" Thor's deep voice brought her out of her winding, baffling thoughts.
"Thinking," she said absently. Her eyes fell everywhere except for Thor. They then widened in realization. "By the gods..." Mouth parted, Esme snapped her head up to meet Thor.
"What, Esme?" Thor looked almost pained at waiting for her answer.
"We've been caught up so many issues, so much battle...that I haven't been able to think past that. See past that. Now..." She stepped closer.
The looks she had thought Thor had given her made sense. Up until now, they had remained a mystery. Perhaps she had found herself giving him the same looks, she just didn't realize what they meant.
"I...I think I'm going mad," Esme whispered.
"What would make you think that?"
"I...I want you to kiss me."
Thor looked as confused as Esme sounded. "Come again?"
The female Asgardian nodded her head fervently. "Kiss me."
Esme felt more confident about her choice when the God of Thunder listened to her request.
~*~
Esme hadn't caught herself touching her lips until she felt her fingers there. Their first official kiss, Thor had made the move (at Esme's request). The one to rekindle their relationship, Esme made the move.
How brave she felt, as though it was a huge accomplishment.
When the two got back home, they were quiet as they entered through the front door. Esme wasn't quite sure why the air felt so awkward. Of all the hurdles, she felt as though this was finally crossed. Maybe she was reading the room wrong or something.
"We never did get to ask Pepper permission to have us host next time," Esme said conversationally.
"I can reach out to her sometime tomorrow—or is it later today? Either way, I'll contact her."
Esme yawned, the bed calling her name. She let her feet guide her down the hall to the bedroom. She collapsed onto her bed, not bothering to pull herself under the sheets. The excitement of the day had drained her.
Esme rolled herself onto her back, screeching as she saw Thor launch himself onto the bed and her. She let out a squeak of surprise, then tired laughter as he took her into his arms.
"Have you finally decided to upgrade from the floor of my bedroom?" she teased him.
"If you'll have me."
The two never got under the sheets, instead they laid across the bed. Esme tucked herself under one of Thor's arms, and the two laid in silence. Esme's mind could not quiet, neither could her heartbeat. She had a hand over Thor's chest, and his heartbeat was running too.
"I suppose we should talk about earlier," Esme said quietly.
"I suppose we should. I...I wasn't expecting that."
A tiny smirk crept onto her lips. "I caught you by surprise? That doesn't happen often."
"It's usually the other way around."
"Indeed. So...what does this mean for us? We've technically started over from the time you found my house. Do we go about things as normal...or do we continue where we left off?"
"That question has been in my mind since we left Pepper's."
"It has?" Esme moved as she felt Thor shift under her. She sat up, as did he. "My mind was replaying earlier memories..."
"Oh, let me guess: our first kiss."
Esme blushed. "That obvious?"
"You know, for as long as I've known you, I've never seen you blush so much, Esme."
"I suppose you tend to bring that out in me. I feel more down-to-earth and less warrior-like when I'm with you. And that's most definitely not a bad thing."
"I can say the same notion." He put his head on Esme's shoulder. "I did want to repair our friendship, if I couldn't repair all that we had. It seems as though we did more than expected."
"It would seem so," she agreed. "But back to your earlier thought that you never quite finished..."
"I believe that's a decision we need to make together."
"I agree. Where do we stand, Thor?"
"Well, signs have indicated we're back together. I can't get a read for how deep you feel we're in to this restart of us."
Esme blinked. While the past still hurt to think of, she was more focused on the present. Thor was having more good days than bad (that she knew of, at least), they seemed to have made up for lost time.
Without warning, Thor removed himself from Esme without a word. She watched him curiously, warily. He didn't carry an angry posture, but rather...anxious. It was a sight rarely seen with the God of Thunder. It was rarer to see him pace as he was.
When Esme got up to stop his pacing, as her feet hit the floor, he halted. The two exchanged looks. Esme went to Thor, taking his big hands in hers. She sighed through her nose, closing her eyes as he kissed her forehead.
When she opened them, she nearly dropped his hands from shock. She had only seen him get to one knee before...
"T-Thor..." she stammered.
"I wasn't great with this the first time, so, maybe this will be better the second time around."
Esme wanted to avoid his eyes, but she couldn't. They held her undivided attention.
"Esme, of all the things I did not expect to find, I found it in you. Even when we were apart, we've found each other time and time again. There must be something written in the stars that allows us to keep coming back to one another.
"I ask of you, Esme, for your hand in marriage."
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