Firestar- I hate it when someone throws a walrus at my grandmother
Brambleclaw- I hate it when I open the fridge and get punched by a bear
Cloudtail- I hate it when I walk outside and someone throws a fridge at me
Ashfur- I hate it when I'm studying and a velociraptor throws poo at me
Leafpool- O-O
SquirrelFlight- I hate it when I walk outside and someone throws a walrus at me
Leadpool- not you too!
SquirrelFlight- (troll face) hehehehe
Berrynose- sometimes I roll around in my garden and pretend I'm a carrot
Firestar- IM A WALRUS
Leafpool- (slowly backs away) O_O
Bumblestripe- Sometimes when I'm lonely i gnaw on the bark of a tree
Leafpool- (runs scarred for life) O-O
Spiderleg- sometimes when I'm bored I fill up my bathtub and pretend I'm a walrus
Dustpelt- when I'm lonely i fart rainbows
Sandstorm- sometimes when I'm lonely I climb a tree and pretend I'm a squirrel
Ferncloud- when I eat cheese I go bonkers
Bluestar- sometimes when I'm sad I throw velociraptors at people
Greystripe- sometimes when I pretend die I get eaten by a badger
Lionblaze- mostly when I'm studying I get beaten up by a fridge
Hollyleaf- sometimes when I'm alone I dress up as a potato and just sit on my couch
Jayfeather- I hate when I walk outside and my neighbour eats me
Briarlight- when I'm sad a walrus eats me
Mousefur- mostly after 7:00 I get mauled by a bear
Longtail- sometimes I fight with my chocolate
Whitestorm- sometimes when it's raining out I nibble on pillows
Lionheart- I hate it when you go for a walk and a monkey eats you
Dovewing- I love when your kissed by a microwave at noon
Ivypool- sometimes I fly like a potato
Mistystar- I love when your sofa hugs your fridge
Leopardstar- sometimes I go set my house on fire
Mothwing- mostly I'm obsessed with deep fired ice cream pickles
Willowbreeze- I hate it when you eat your microwave and grow a watermelon in your stomach
Mudclaw- I hate when I spell rainbow wrong and a walrus attacks me
Ottersplash- sometimes when I fight my dogs swallows my oven
Timberfur- I hate when a tree falls on you right after your hair dryer blows up
Oakfur- I love how my potato doesn't do anything
Crookedstar- I hate it when you walk your cat and get eaten by a bear
Silverstream- sometimes when I'm sad I dream of pancakes
Rainflower- when I'm alone I dance like I'm a waffle
Stonepelt- I hate when you swallow your fridge and your dog attacks
StormFur- when I'm lonely I discuss politics with my white board
Feathertail- I love when I fly like I'm a frozen cupcake
BlackStar- I hate it when your betrayed by your monkey
Russetfur- sometimes I get mauled by a pancake
Segewhisker- I hate it when the sky falls on your cake
Tawnypelt- I hate how when I sing my fridge dances
Onestar- sometimes when I'm alone i dress up like a princess and waltz around town
Ashfoot- whenever I go outside a bird poos on my cat
Tallstar- I hate how when your super tall you die of frozen pancakes
Mudclaw- sometimes I smuggle waffles over the boarder
Heathertail- I love how when the man of your dreams eats your microwave

(Bet you laughed at at least one of them .3. Made some of them others found by Google .3.)