Chapter Twenty-five

I was staring at my bucket list for a moment now. I just woke up and I swear to myself that starting today, I will start doing what I've written on my bucket list. The first task is to cherish time with Yulla and Shannie even just for a day. I know daddy has told me that I'm not allowed to go out. That I shouldn't contact any of my friends and yes, that sucks. I really hope that they are not mad at me after I left them without any word.

I realize that I shouldn't be weak now. Especially since I knew Daddy's side. There's a part of me that believes and trusts him but there's also not. Those people will accuse him like that for nothing, right? I know Daddy is a good man. He won't steal someone else's wife just because he doesn't have one anymore, especially from his friends.

I want to believe him but there's always stopping me. What Ethann said last time has been stuck in my head. That Dad gave me a unit so he can bring his girls freely at home. Shame on him, does he even feel guilty every time he sees Mom's picture frame? I shook my head. Ugh, what am I saying?

The notes are still vacant on some pages. I have eight tasks to do before I leave the world. The doctor said that I only have five years to live. I was 24 years old at that time. So that means, I only have five years—I should accomplish my tasks before I turn 24 years old.

I put my smiling selfies on the next page of the notes. I made this my scrapbook. Uh, scrapbook of the events of half of my life? I guess... I remember that I didn't have any selfies with Dawn so I just put my selfies with my best friends here. My pictures with Mommy and Daddy. I am planning to find a photo of Dawn so I can put it here. I miss my boyfriend so bad. Even though I'm not sure if he's still my boyfriend.

As I was busy flipping through my scrapbook pages, the door of my room opened and the image of my Dad suddenly appeared. I see, he is working currently and he just got here to visit me.

"Good morning, Dad!" I hugged him the moment he went closer to me.

"My princess is happy, huh? What happened?" He ran his fingers through the strands of my hair.

"I have a request, Dad. Uh, please can I go out? Don't worry this is just for a day and that's it! Please!" It's corny to say but I did puppy eyes in front of Dad.

"Helly, I thought you already understood our situation right now? It's not safe outside. The culprit might be watching and observing us without us knowing. I just want you to be safe,"

I leave a heavy sigh. Oh yeah, I knew it. I want to tell him and remember that I only have five years to live but I don't want to be a bit dramatic. Err.

"Dad, I just want to be with my best of friends. You know, hanging out with Shannie and Yulla—"

"And making out with a boy let again, Helly?" He cut me off. My eyes widened at what he said. Excuse me, that thought didn't appear in my mind for a long time now.

"Dad! No, I just want to be with them. If you'll see us with a boylet, then that's not mine anymore. That's Shannie's." I explained. That girl, I knew she was searching for a boy to be his boyfriend. After her boyfriend caused her pain, she didn't get over him so she ended up being single for almost a year.

"How can I be sure about that?" He grinned at me. I avoided his gaze. It's not that I'm guilty. Hmm, no way.

"Dad! Trust me, I'm your daughter." I guilt-tripped.

The last time I checked, when I used that daughter-card, it was effective. Dad allowed me to go out after that.

He sighed while eyeing my expression. I then cleared my throat and smiled awkwardly at Dad. Goodness, staying in a room for days sucks! My admirers must miss me now. Hopefully, Ethann didn't tell them that I am slowly becoming bedridden that's why I can't go to Suneast.

"Fine. Bring Ethann with you for your safety."

I furrowed my brows and my nose suddenly smoked in piss. "But Dad!"

"No but's, Helly. Bring him with you, period. And promise me that it's just for a day. Send me a picture so I can be sure. Bye, be safe."

That was it and after that, he left the room. Even though it was against my will, I dialed Ethann's number and called him. He is even exaggerating when he realizes that I insisted on calling him this time. What the heck Ethann? I don't know what to do with you.

"I'll be there in a few minutes, I love you Helleon!"

"Okay, thanks," I respond and ended the call.

My eyes widened when I realized something. He just said I love you to me? What the! Oh thankfully, I didn't answer the right word for it. I guess it's not being rude anymore. I am just being honest here that I don't love him—but I like him as a friend. I appreciated him for being a one-call-away friend. So maybe that's enough? I collapsed my body on the bed and rolled my eyes for myself. I want to slap myself now.

***

"Eummie baby boo? Is that you? Oh my goodness, good thing it's not your ghost—Oh my gee I miss you so much." As she hugs me, she inhaled in my shirt trying to sniff to know how I smell. Oh gosh. “I miss this scent of you so much! Finally, you're here now—oh my gosh, I might cry!” Shannie's exaggerated eyes and expression faced me. It is so very evident that it even made my eyes almost teary.

"I'm sorry Shannie, uh, I didn't expect that tragedy to happen to my family. Daddy's been forbidding me to go out and communicate with everyone. It's so hard for me to leave my best friends but I need to. Sorry, I think I'm being selfish."

I can't help but spill it to her. All of it. I know it is safe because they're my friends and they deserve to hear everything. When Ethann came into my room lately, we immediately headed to his car. I don't know if Yulla is free so we just went to Shannie's unit. Today is the weekend so I expected her to be here. And now, Ethann is with us. He is actually in the living area while I and Shannie is in the kitchen.

"Oh, Eummie baby boo, don't worry I understand! Though you know Yulla has been disappointed in you and I also understand her. I told her multiple times that of course, your safety is what your Dad prioritizes."

The concerned eyes of Shannie are very evident now. I am wearing sweaters and denim pants so that they can't see what is really happening to me.

It is already ten in the morning and Shannie already called Yulla. When Shannie told me that Yulla is disappointed in me, I immediately felt uncomfortable. Hopefully, she won't slap me later when she will saw me. Hopefully, she will realize and understand me. If Daddy didn't forbid me to communicate with them then this shouldn't be happening.

"I'm sorry, Yulla,"

I couldn't control my tears and the bucket of it escaped suddenly into my eyes. When I saw Yulla appear in Shannie's room, yes we're here to have some privacy.

"Helly, you're here..." she immediately ran to me and hugged me very tightly. As if she can't believe that she saw me again. I hugged her back too and at that moment, the room filled with tears and the happiness of our friendships.

"I'm also sorry for getting mad at you. I can't resist you Helly so I forgive you immediately after I realize everything that Shannie said." I felt a liquid on my shoulder and that was her tears.

“It's fine, I understand, Yulla. Thank you so much.” After seems a moment, we finally let go of each other and I wiped my tears afterward. "Uh, how are you guys?"

After the teary moment, we calmed down and started to talk about things. I told them everything that happened. When Dad has been accused of someone's affair but I didn't tell them that it was Dawn's mother. I don't want them to think about it too much and I hope they'll understand.

"I'm single again."

"You broke up?" My eyes widened at what I heard from Yulla. Oh goodness, I couldn't believe it. They look so good together and their relationship seems strong. Why all of a sudden?

Yulla bit her lips and nodded. Shannie immediately went to listen. I can still see the pain in her eyes and it's like she still hasn't gotten through the pain. "Uh, I was also at fault. I actually saw them—with her best friend. Remember what I told you guys, he's been prioritizing her best friend more than me and I thought that was just fine. They are friends of course. But one day, I went to their Department, with my two eyes! I saw them kissing in the locker room. At first, I thought that maybe it was just a friendly kiss so I let it slide. But one time, I opened my boyfriend's account, and I saw some fluttering messages from her best friend. T-they even exchange their I love you. I know, he didn't allow me to open his account without my permission so when I decided to break up with him officially, I reasoned that I was falling out of love."

The teary Yulla wiped her tears. I thought her boyfriend's been so loyal and faithful to her. He looks so in love with her every time I see them together. But what happened? Does anyone really commit cheating? Then Dawn must be cheating on me now. I rolled my eyes. What am I thinking...

“I want to slap him so bad for hurting you, you know? I hope you didn't stop me.” Shannie rolled her eyes.

“He didn't tell you the truth that he's been unfaithful, didn't he?” I asked.

Yulla nods. “And that is what makes me angrier as ever. How couldn't he not tell me? And yeah, perhaps he doesn't care about me anymore.”

“How bullshit he was.” Shannie rolled her eyes again. “I almost fainted the moment I saw the girl! She's not even beautiful. I pitied your ex for having so low standard.” Shannie chuckled.

“He doesn't deserve you, Yulla.”

“Helly, I know that's why I'm telling myself that if one day, he'll ask to be my boyfriend again, I will say no.” She winced. “I don't deserve an asshole.”

"Alright, alright, guys, I'll go to the kitchen first. I'll just make popcorn. Let's have a movie marathon later!" We both nodded at Shannie who now left the room.

Now, I and Yulla are alone together and I told her about my illness. I want to ask for help on how to tell Shannie about this that's why.

"W-What?!”

I nodded bitterly at Yulla. I spilled the tea on her. A shocking expression was plastered on her face.

"I just found out about it a week ago... Here, I have so many red spots." I pointed to the parts of my body that had red spots.

"Helly, what the heck... No, this can't be! You're not leaving again, right?"

I swallowed hard. I can't promise. "I only have five years, Yulla, that's what the doctor told me," I said.

"Where did you get these? I mean leukemia? Oh my goodness, I can't believe this is happening. Uh, does Dawn already know about this?"

I avoided her gaze. Oh about that, I don't actually know how to tell him about it. "Uh, no. I don't have any plans on telling him."