Chapter Fifteen

The whole weekend seems like bitter days for me. I didn't bother to call Dawn and asked about it. There's a part of me that I shouldn't meddle with because I think I don't have any right to do it. Even though we are 'friends', I know that doesn't mean I'll destroy the barrier between us. Ugh, fuck that barrier.

I just stayed in my room to sleep. I changed my bed position multiple times and rolled over and over again but still, my eyes won't participate. I touched my chest nth times as it was beating so fast. It's like there's a motocross happening there.

I banged my head on the headboard. Dawn and that curvy girl have been running to my head now. I don't know what to do with my feelings. I am stupid enough to fall for someone who only treats me as his close friend. For an almost perfect and grown man like Dawn, he won't probably fall for someone like me. I'm way much younger than him and we don't like the same things. I like pink while he loves black. See, too much difference. That's kinda sad, I know but what else I can do? From now on, I will stop assuming things. It will just hurt me and break me. I thought.

Maybe, I also need to distance myself from him? Avoid him like we're strangers. Ugh, I think I can't do that. I can't resist his scorching presence. Okay, in the meantime, I'll ignore him and if he'll try to chase me, I'll tell him that I like him. I closed my eyes firmly as I blushed with my own thought.

“You sure, later?” Yulla while clinging onto her boyfriend's arm. They are both sweet to each other. I somewhat envy their relationship. They didn't experience intense troubles.

“Yeah…” That was almost a whisper. I don't want Ethann to know about our night out later. Better hide it from him. He doesn't oblige to know my whereabouts, anyway.

“Okay, then. We'll just wait for Shannie. Bye!” She kissed me on my right cheek. I kissed back. That is how we bid our goodbyes to each other.

My heart pounded so fast as I spot a familiar black mustang. No, I didn't. I bit my lower lip and managed myself to not look at it. Act as if, I don't know him just like before that night happened.

“Did you just insist on going with me now? Wow, Helly.” Glowing eyes and smile escaped from Ethann making me secretly roll my eyes. Overreacting. I still don't know why Daddy trusts this Gladstone boy so much. To the point that he believed him more than my explanation.

I tried to look in the black mustang's direction. I almost gasped for air because I saw how his eyes turned dark—I mean, his eyes were already dark but this time, they became darker.  I glared my eyes to the ground and stop looking at him.

As Ethann opened the shotgun seat's door for me, I then looked in his direction again. Dawn is leaning handsomely toward his black mustang while eyeing me. Oh my goodness, what's with that look? I saw him look down and play with the stones near his foot. His hands were in his denim pocket. He looks good there but there's something I couldn't get.

Can't he see? I don't want to go with him so why bother waiting for me as if I will change my decision?

“Hey, what are you looking at?”

I turned my head to Ethann who now begins to maneuver the car's engine.

“N-Nothing.” I stuttered.

I shouldn't let myself fall for him deeply. I remembered how his arms snaked on that girl's waist. Probably, those type of woman is his type. Not the bratty ones. I envy her.

When I got home, fortunately, we didn't have any homework today so I was free. I invited my best of friends to have some Hangouts. I miss going tonight out just like we used to do before. Before I met Dawn.

I immediately took a shower to keep myself fresh. I wore my blue faded ripped high-waisted jeans and paired them with a black bustier top. I tied my long brown hair up. I looked gorgeous as always. I captured a photo of it and posted it on my Instagram story.

I put a simple make-up on my face that will complement on the lights at the club. Shannie said she'll pick me here and the three of us will go together there.

***

The crowd is wild. The lights make me dizzy but it's fine though, I'm used to it. I immediately walked to the nearest vacant couch and sat there.

There are a lot of boys who're like a predator finding their prey. But for tonight, I don't have any plans for making out. I don't know why I feel like I shouldn't do that thing again. A sudden disgust crept within me. Why did I do it before anyway? Kissing random guys without even knowing if they're handsome or not?!

The three of us didn't bother to pick a boylet. We're just here and having some drinks. The place was filled with a soulful laugh from us. Shannie had been making some somewhat corny jokes but her laugh is like a virus. It is infectious.

“That was the most embarrassing moment ever!” She again burst out laughing.

After a few moments, I finally felt dizzy. Funny to admit but in just two shots of drinks, I am already drunk. That is how weak I am when it comes to liquor.

“Where are you going?! Hey Helly!”

I heard Shannie shout. So annoying. I want to dance! I miss dancing in places like this. Oh goodness. I miss this feeling.

“Just here!” I answered.

They didn't bother to follow where I was heading. I managed to fit myself on the wild and crowded dance floor. I saw a lot of people making out here like wild animals—eww what's that?! I winced at them but I just ignored it.

The DJ made the music wilder. It can make you forget the world. I started to dance as what I used to do and smiled. Finally, I had time for myself. I want to forget the world and my feelings for Dawn. I just hope that this is just a simple attraction that you can tame anytime.

However, It's not just like that. This feeling is a strange one. My mind keeps on saying that I should avoid Dawn to protect my heart from heartbreaks but my stubborn heart keeps on shouting how I missed him as each minute passed. So what am I going to do now?

“Hey! Eummie! Don't go far.”

I knew it. That's Shannie. “I'm not going far…” I said while my head was spinning because of the lights and the crowd.

“You're getting stubborn again. I just don't want something to happen to you again just like last night we got here.”

I knotted my brows as I am feeling annoyed. Going out in a place like this is boring if I don't dance! Can't she understand it? Goodness, eh.

“Argh, stop acting like my Mommy.” I rolled my eyes while she was leading our way.

She just laughed. “Because you're my Eummie babyboo!”

I rolled my eyes again. Whatever.

When we got back to our couch, I immediately felt out of place. My gosh! Who's this boy snaking his arms on Shannie's waist?! And Yulla? She's just at the side and busy scrolling on her phone as if she doesn't care about whatever will happen to her best friends.

I leaned my head on the couch because I am still feeling dizzy. This night out is the most boring ever! Well, my friends won't let me kiss someone in the crowd again! As if I have plans for it, I just want to dance.

How many times do I have to tell them that I know what I am doing? I want to cry right now. I don't have my freedom anymore.

“Hi, I'm Kier.”

My brows furrowed when I saw someone sitting beside me.

“Okay?” I answered as I am not with myself. I am feeling sleepy.

I immediately gasped for air when I felt his arms snaking on my waist. I secretly rolled my eyes. Damn, boys.

“You won't ask if I like your arms on my waist?” I intended to offend him lol.

He glared at me ashamedly. Now, I want to burst out laughing.

“I'm confident that you like it. Most of the girls wanted me. So, you're lucky enough that I am sitting beside you now. You're lucky that you caught my attention.”

“I am not part of those girls so leave my waist if you don't want me to kick you off into this world.” I rolled my eyes. Most girls wanted him? I pity their standards. They should get attracted to someone like Dawn. A grown humble man. Unlike this boy, he is not even hot or handsome. Grrr.

“Oh, Dawn? What are you doing here?”

That name Yulla mentioned rang in my ears. I automatically turn my head. Oh  M G. He is hot as hell now. He is dazzling as ever! That unforgettable eyes, nose, and very manly scent. The scent that screams his name. A simple v-neck navy blue shirt suits him. I blushed immediately when his eyes landed on mine.

Helly, you don't know him. Look away.

“Looking for someone?” This boy named Kier is feeling close.

“Yeah, so get off your hands on her.” My heart raced as I heard how his voice became deep as the ocean.

Kier got embarrassed and I'm somewhat happy about that. Damn, Dawn saved me, eh?

“Oh, I didn't know so does this mean that your girlfriend is cheating on you? I pity you, man.”

I simply looked at Dawn who's deeply and coldly glared at Kier. He looks so small.

“Maybe, I guess?”

What?!

My eyes became wide open. Until Kier went away, my eyes stayed wide open. No! The heck! I am not cheating because, in the first place, he is not my boyfriend!

“What are you doing?!” I shouted and faced him.

“Getting what's mine?”

I can feel my blood going up. “I'm not yours.” I coldly said and walked away but he stopped and grabbed me with his arms only. How strong.

“What?!” I annoyingly hissed.

He looked away and I didn't get him. I hate how my heart raced so fast. This man is giving me false hopes again. I rolled my eyes at him a few times. Every man who gives me mixed signals deserves them.

I can feel his cool breath as he pulled me closer to him. I can feel the scorching tension that we made. We are so near to each other now. He sighed heavily and his piercing eyes glued on mine. “S-Sorry. Damn, I think I'm jealous.”

I let out a not-so-funny laugh. “Don't fool me, Dawn. Stop making me assume things.” I said but it seems like he didn't hear it.

“I hate seeing you with another man, Helly. I want you to be mine.” His eyes were like pleading to me and any minute now, I could melt like an ice cream. Especially when he added something to his sentence. “Just be mine.” I saw he clenched his jaw and went nearer to me. One inch move and we will kiss.