DEAN'S POV

"Mr. Kamau, time to go. Your ride is here." The officer who had released River less than an hour ago yelled as he opened my cell doors.

Hope bloomed in my chest when I heard him say that. My girl had actually come through for me. I didn't know how she had pulled it off but she had.

"Is my wife here?" I asked the surprisingly nice officer.

I'd watched videos and read articles of how bad police brutality was in the US but the officer had been nothing but kind to us. It was probably because he was mixed so he took pity on me but still I was grateful.

"No." He replied shortly leading me out of the cells.

"Who came to pick me up then?" I asked him.

He did not reply, just led me outside the cell block where tow mean looking officers in uniform with the words "ICE" boldly imprinted on their chest proclaimed. I was fucked.

"Dean Kamau?" One of them called out staring me down.

"Yes sir." I nodded reminding myself to be polite.

I knew I was on the wrong and I did not want to piss them off any further if I was to get back home safely. Their presence meant that River was too late to save me or that her father had refused to help her out which I had expected. The man had been looking for a chance to get rid of me ever since I landed in LA and it had been served to him on a silver platter.

"Get your belongings. We are your ride to the airport." Officer number two replied.

"Airport?" I asked [playing dumb.

"Yes, you are going back to your country." He answered.

"So fast?"
"Mr. Kamau you are an undocumented immigrant, what did you think was going to happen? Did you want a meeting with the president or to dine with Beyonce?" Officer number one asked sarcastically.

"No sir." I nodded.

I got my stuff from the officer who had arrested us and signed my release papers.

"Good luck." He whispered as he handed me my wallet and wedding ring since that's all I had given him the previous night.

"Thanks." I nodded as I slid my ring onto my finger and pocketed my wallet.

The two officers led me out of the police station in handcuffs as if I was a criminal which I actually was and into the back of a police land cruiser. They did not waste any tome leaving the police station as they drove me to the airport away from my wife.

My waridi. I would surely miss her but at least I got the chance to say goodbye. I would be forever grateful to the officer who had given us those few minutes before River was arrested to say goodbye.

"Seriously I've got to ask, how did you manage to get into the country? We found no record of you." Officer number one asked staring at me through the steel bars separating the front and back seats.

"Rich wife, private jet." I answered honestly since there was no point in lying anymore.

"So you want us to believe that you are actually married to River Anderson, heir to the Anderson fortune." Officer number two mocked.

"I've got game I guess." I retorted.

"And a smart mouth it seems. That family is associated with the mafia you know, hell if I didn't know any better I would say they are the mafia. They are responsible for a lot or wrong doings and deaths like that shooting in the city last night. Do you have anything to say about that? Maybe if you help us, we can help you." Officer number two asked.

I looked at him as if he was crazy. He expected me to be a mole and rat out my wife and father-in- law. That man had been nothing but cruel to me but I would not be the reason for his downfall.

"What do you Americans say? I plead the fifth." I replied with a smirk.

"Smug bastard. Just know that those you are protecting are going to stay here in America leading lavish, luxurious lifestyles while you go back to your third world country to rot away in poverty. Officer number one scoffed.

"You have never been outside of this country have you?" I asked with a bitter laugh.

He was looking down on me because supposedly I came from a poor country but Kenya was among the most developed countries in Africa. He would know that if he wasn't so self-centered and egotistical but to each their own.

"I will let you know that I went back-packing in Thailand after high school." He replied with a smug smile as if that was supposed to impress me.

I didn't care to reply and was silent for the rest of the drive no matter how much they questioned and prodded me. I spaced out of everything and went full on Zombie mode as they transported me like a criminal. There was no point in trying to fight it so all I did was mourn my marriage in silence. River was still alive and so was I but our life together was as good as dead. Her father had succeeded in separating us and I knew for a fact that he would never let River go.

The officers were kind enough to remove my ankle monitor before we went into the airport because it kept setting off metal detectors. They trued to question me about it but I did not answer any of their questions. My heart hurt and I was in too much pain. After they handed me over to airport security, everything after that went like a blur. I barely remembered the plane ride, the multiple stop overs or the uncomfortable seats. All I was aware of was that I had just lost the love of my life.

As soon as we landed in Kenya an eternity later, I was supposed to be picked up by the Kenyan police but they did not show up so airport security dumped me outside the airport. I was actually grateful for that because I did not have it in me to deal with the police.

It felt weird being back in Kenya but I was still in Zombie mode so I exchanged the hundred dollar bills I had in my wallet for Kenyan currency and took a cab to the city. From there I boarded a matatu to Karen, back to a home my wife and I had bought together to spend the rest of our lives in but was now just a painful reminder of the life I had lost just because I had let a stupid white man calling me a nigger piss me off.

It was late in the evening when I arrived at the mansion and thankfully Jomo was still there since I did not have my keys and he let me in.

"Welcome back sir, how was your trip." He asked looking at me weirdly.

I knew I looked bad. I had not showered in two days and I had just endured a twenty hour flight without my wife so yeah I looked terrible.

"Disastrous." I replied shortly.

"Where is your wife sir." Jomo asked.

"Back in the states with her family." I replied shortly.

He did not ask me any more questions which I was grateful for. He probably sensed that something had gone wrong and I was not in a chatty mood so he let me be. I went into the house and headed directly for the master bedroom. I did not bother looking for Wangeci, Jomo would fill her in.

Our bedroom was till the same as we had left it and everything still smelled like River. We had been away for a whole month yet our room looked like we hadn't left. Wangeci had done a good job taking care of the house.

The first thing I did was take off the clothes I had been wearing since our date night two nights ago and get into the shower. I took my time in there as if trying to wash all the bad things that had happened to me off my body. I felt fresh afterwards but my heart was still in turmoil. I changed into a pair of sweatpants and a matching hoodie, brushed my teeth and passed out on top of the bed feeling too exhausted to get under the covers.

I had no idea how long I slept but when I woke up, it was a new day and the sun was shining brightly bathing the room in beautiful natural light. River had loved that aspect of our master bedroom, too bad she would never be able to enjoy it ever again.

Ever since the beginning of the year every activity of my day had been controlled by River but now she was no longer a apart of my life and I had no idea what to do with myself. River was back home with her family and I was stuck in the home we had bought together with the hopes of building our lives together.

I got out of bed and made my own bed for the first time in months, River had always done it for me but she wasn't around anymore. I was a married man yet I was going back to my bachelor life. Ironic right? No' more like sad and pathetic.

After taking a shower and brushing my teeth I got dressed in a black pair of jeans, a white t-shirt, a dark-red hoodie and white adidas sneakers ready to salvage my life. I needed to remind myself what life before River was like and that hurt like hell.

Wangeci was in the kitchen when I walked in stocking up the fridge.

"Good morning, sir." She greeted politely.

"Morning." I mumbled.

"Welcome back sir, I was just stocking up the fridge for you. Would you like anything to eat sir?" She asked me.

I was about to say no but then I remembered that I had not eaten in more than forty eight hours which was unhealthy. I did not feel like eating, all I wanted was to crawl into a ball and waste away but even if River was gone, I still had my family to think about. My parents and siblings depended on me and I was not going to let them down.

"Pancakes and some coffee will be good." I requested.

"Right away sir." She nodded and immediately got to work.

I looked around and realized that every corner of the house was haunted by River. She had paid for it for crying out loud but the time we had spent together after coming back from our honeymoon is what made my thoughts even more painful. River would always be a part of me and whether I ever saw her again or not, that fact would never change.

"Here you go sir." Wangeci said pushing a plate of pancakes, a fruit bowl and a steaming mug of coffee right in front of me.

"Thank you." I replied gratefully and dug in.

Breakfast was delicious and even though I did not have much of an appetite I still ate every morsel Wangeci had served for me.

"Thank you for breakfast." I said gratefully.

"Is there anything else you would like sir?" she asked me.

"No, I'm okay. Wait yeah, where are the car keys?" I asked.

I needed to leave the house and get away for a while. I felt like I would suffocate if I spent all day alone in a house that was supposed to be our home with my absentee wife.

"In your bedroom bedside drawer sir. I put them there after Jomo took the car out for servicing last week." She answered.

"Thanks." I nodded and pushed the stool back ready to leave but Wangeci stopped me.

"I'm sorry to intrude sir. I know its none of my business and feel free to tell me if I am over stepping but I happened to notice that you did not come back with your wife sir or any of the luggage you left with. Is everything okay? Some of the guards were talking and they said that the night before you left, armed foreigners came into the house." Wangeci asked.

I thought about what to say to her and realized that as much as I could not tell her the truth, I needed to give her something. When River and I left we were a happily married couple and now I had come back alone and desolate.

"Those men were her family and River will be staying in the states with her father." I said shortly.

"For how long sir?" Wangeci inquired.

"I do not know." I replied honestly.

Wangeci looked like she wanted to ask more but I had nothing to say to her so I left the kitchen taking the stairs two at a time to my room. I found the car keys, my wallet and my old phone since the iPhone was lost somewhere on the floor of River's dad Italian restaurant.

I couldn't get out of the compound fast enough. I had no idea where I was going to go but I found myself headed directly for the one place that had always been my safe haven when something went wrong.

"Dean?" My mom called out surprised as she gazed at me from head to toe as if to confirm I was not a figment of her imagination.

I would have let myself into the house but I had left the house in too much of a hurry and did not bring my keys with me.

"Mom." I choked up falling into her arms and hugging her tight.

I didn't care if anyone saw me being vulnerable in that moment. All I knew is that I needed my mom, her comforting hug and to be on familiar safe ground.

"Oh dear, what is it?" my mom asked sounding confused by my sudden burst of affection.

My voice was clogged with emotion so I couldn't say anything without chocking up. I just hugged her tighter with the hopes that she could take my pain away.

"It's okay. I'm here, you're home. Let it out." Mama dearest consoled rubbing my back comfortingly.

After I was calm enough, I stepped back and kicked my shoes off letting myself into the house.

"Are you here alone? Where is my daughter in law?" My mom asked looking outside as if she expected River to walk up the stairs with her usual bright smile.

"She is not here mom." I replied dropping heavily onto the sofa.

"What do you mean she is not here?" My mom asked closing the door and turning to glare at me.

"Is anyone else in the house." I asked recalling it was a Saturday so dad and Dwayne were probably around.

"No, it's just me. Your brother got interested in football so your dad signed him up with the local league and he takes him there every Saturday." She answered.

"What else has changed while I was gone?" I asked bitterly.

I knew the whole football thing was probably new thus why I did not know about it since my mom had kept me well updated about everything that was going on but I still felt bad realizing that I might have missed out on a couple of things.

My mom took a seat on the sofa next to me giving me her come-clean-before-I-whoop-it-out-of-you look.

"I tried calling you yesterday but you have not been online since our last call on Thursday." My mom informed me.

"I'm sorry. I lost my phone." I apologized avoiding looking into her eyes before I caved.

"Dean don't make me force it out of you. You just showed up here without informing me that you were back, River is not with you and you look as if you just crawled out of hell itself. What's going on?" My mom asked.

I finally managed to meet my moms eyes and she did not looked pleased. I had been trying to stay strong and bottle it all in but with one look from my mom, it all came poring out. I told her everything from the real reason as to why river had come to Kenya, her family history, our wedding, how I found out, her fathers visit, the reason behind our visit to LA, more about the family business, our stay there and River's father hate towards me and finally everything that had transpired over the last forty eight plus hours. My mom did not interrupt me the whole time I was talking and she just let me let it all out.

By the time I was done talking the damn had broken and I was crying, close to hyperventilating as everything dawned on me. I had lost my wife and that was a hard pill to swallow.

"That's it, let it all out." My mom encouraged.

She held me as I cried offering words of comfort that did nothing to ease my pain but it did feel good to cry and tell my mom the truth. Whoever said that grown men were not supposed to cry was stupid because it felt good, almost therapeutic.

I finally managed to calm myself down. My mom sent me to the bathroom to clean up and when I came back she was waiting for me with a cup of coffee and a smile. I expected her to be angry at me for keeping the truth from her so the smile was confusing.

"Why are you smiling?" I asked her as I took a sip of my coffee,

"Because I was right. I knew something was wrong with the two of you. I am not pleased to find out what the problem actually was but I am glad that I can still trust my instincts." She answered her smile getting bigger.

"I'm glad you feel good mom but I am lost. I don't know what to do without River." I confessed swallowing the tears.

I was done crying and was now in desperate need of advice about the way forward.

"Dean there is nothing that you can do but wait. You did your best for that girl, you fought for her but her father was too much of a strong force. You have to believe that your love is strong enough to overcome it all. If River is meant to be yours then she will come back to you and if not, you will heal and find a way to move on." My mom said.

The thought of being with someone else other than River, my waridi, was unimaginable.

"She's the one mom. There is no one else for me but her." I asserted.

"Then pray son. Pray that the universe will be kind enough to bring the two of you together once more." My mom replied.

I nodded at her and took a sip of my coffee, letting it burn my tongue so I could focus on that pain as compared to the one ripping my heart apart.

"So, the mafia you say? Is it like the one in the movies." My mom asked.

"No, it's worse ama and why are you so calm about this. I expected you to be more hysterical after finding out that you are now linked to a mafia family." I asked.

"I always knew that was something off about River. She is too young to have that kind of wealth so it had to have come from somewhere. We cant chose the family we are born into dean but River is a nice girl and not a murderer. Lets hope and pray that she finds her way back to you and away from her father." Mom answered.

I nodded even though her words were of little comfort. My mom kept asking me questions about River and her family an since it was not a secret anymore I told her everything she wanted to know. Talking to my mom was good but it did not erase the turmoil in me. I needed something stronger than coffee to drown the pain so I borrowed my mom's phone and called Dishan. I had his number memorized since he had been my emergency contact during my wild campus days and he mine.

"Hello."

"Hey Di, its Dean. Where are you?" I asked him.

"Dean my man. Wait this is Kenyan number, does this mean that your back." He inquired.

"Yes, where are you?" I repeated.

"At the hotel, what's up?"

"I need a pick-me-up." I replied.

"That bad huh?" he asked getting serious when I used our old code.

It meant day drinking. My mom as in the kitchen but I did not want to risk her over hearing that I wanted to go drinking before midday.

"Yes."

"Meet me at Georgi's in half an hour or do you need a ride." He offered.

"No. I'll meet you there." I agreed and hang up.

Georgi's was a popular bar we went to a lot we'd probably get a membership if they had any to give.

"Mom I'm leaving." I said to her once she came back into the living room.

"So soon? I thought you were going to stay for lunch?" She questioned.

"Another time mom. I have a couple of things that I have to deal with." I replied getting back.

"Okay, take care of yourself. I am here for you if you want to talk." She offered.

"I know mom." I nodded hugging her.

I was out of the house in two minutes before she deduced that I was lying to her. I took a detour to a telecommunications shop first to get new Sim cards before heading for the bar.

Dishan was there waiting for me with a table filled with drinks and zero questions exactly how I wanted it. He knew I would open up once I was drunk enough so all he did was hand me a bottle of vodka and shot glass. I put the glass aside and took a swig directly from the bottle.

Time to drown out the pain.