"I cannot let you burn me up, nor can I resist you. No mere human can stand in a fire and not be consumed."

  ⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

𝑪𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔 

"—Dude, what did I say?" I have to talk to my little cousin like he is a child. Well, he is, but he's not a damn baby.

"Really, man? Okay, bet. I'll be there for Halloweekend. Hannah's gonna be so pumped! Have you seen her, yet? Her plane should've landed!" Jack's talking a mile a minute.

I put my feet up on my desk and roll my wrist to rush him off the phone.

"Not yet, man. Text her." I tell him.

Seeing Phil and Frank outside of the glass door, I roll my eyes and give them both the finger.

Phil catches it and pretends to suck it like a dick, making Frank hysterical. They are the poster children for underdeveloped frat guys who peaked in college. Their brains combined are the size of the walnut yet they manage to work at the same place as me. I give them a lot of shit, but they make the work day a lot easier. Without them two, I wouldn't laugh or crack a smile in this damn office. Well, if I didn't have Morgan's texts throughout the day and this framed photo of her on my desk to keep my head on straight.

I let Jack to know that Morgan and I will have a guest room ready for them this weekend but they'll have to have their own plans on Saturday because that's Morgan's party and no kids are allowed.

The way she's advertised this party, it'll be the banger of the year. The only bummer is Izzy — the known party girl— is pregnant and sober. She sucks. Lee, though, said he needs this party. Nothing's better than letting loose with the boys and Morgan, especially in the comfort of our own home. We already figured Lee and JB will get shit-faced so we're saving the other bedroom for them with some cots on the floor and an air mattress.

I've just been counting down the seconds 'til I clock out, and the minutes to the weekend.

One more day, I remind myself in my head. You can make it to Friday.

The whole office is buzzing about the party. Not everyone was invited, see. It was a secret until Phil and Frank ran their mouths about it, bragging because they're allowed to come but that's only because Morgan felt generous enough to extend the offer. I'm only mad that Beck found out. It's not like he'll dare to show up at my house, knowing I don't fuck with him, but I hate that he even knows my business outside of these walls. How we've coexisted this long after The Hamptons and the ball incidents is beyond me. Let's call it growth, though. I'll give myself a pat on the back.

Between Mia( my assistant) and Mom, I don't know who's worse. Actually, no, Jasmine is the worst. She's a nightmare when it comes to party planning. You'd think it was her wedding. I've had to tell her to chill and physically put her in a chair in time out myself. I think she's going all crazy over this to distract herself because Jabari was caught cheating. Again.
I love my bro but he's so damn stupid. I give Jasmine a lot of grief, but deep down she's a great woman. Usually she can keep him in check, but she was out of town and he took advantage. Luckily, he didn't tell me about it this time as it happened so I could honestly tell Morgan and Jas I had no clue. I don't even know the girl.
Anyway, Morgan's mad at him about it so we haven't been able to hang out - JB and I.

Mom is on my ass 'cause I haven't been calling but I've been busy. I wish she'd understand that.
She tells me it's not hard to pick up the phone for at least a minute just to say hi but sometimes I don't have a minute.
Morgan's been talking to her and Dad, though. Mom's been offering to fly out again to help with the party but that's very unnecessary. I do miss them, though, but if I invite them, I'll have to invite Dale, Crystal, Kelsey, and Owen, and so on.

Work is work, that shit doesn't get any less stressful. I'll be glad when Russ is out of my hair but he's been less of a pain lately, mostly bothering the contractors now. Thank God.

No, I've been busy working on my relationship with Morgan. It's clear we're still together, I'm back to sleeping in the bed, and we're back to saying "I love you" at the end of all our conversations. She hasn't said the "b" word again, yet, though - boyfriend. She said something about us being "friends" and I laughed in her face. She got all upset and sent me some shady supposedly relatable Tiktoks basically saying how she felt. I ignored them.
She's not mad at me right now, just confused, I think. It'll take a little longer, I guess.

I'm confused, too. Confused about why we haven't had sex, yet! I'm dying here! I know it's not everything, but it's a big thing. She's been working on her body, too, her ass is getting bigger. My God.
I tried to get something started the other night but she was "tired." She's strong, I'll give her that. If she wants me to remain patient, I will. How much longer can I hold off? Eh, but I will. For her.

I feel like Halloween night is gonna be the night. I've been trying to see what romantic shit I can sneak into our bedroom to get her in the mood. It needs to be more than the basic shit like candles and rose petals.
I've asked about her fantasies but we've almost fulfilled them all. God, I love her.
I asked Jasmine and Izzy, too, they said Morgan just wants to wait until she "feels secure in our relationship." What the fuck?
I feel secure. I feel real secure, hell, with Sabrina out of the way. I'm on top of the world.

Knock. Knock.

Phil and Frank come in when they see I'm off the phone finally.

"Tell us what you think of our costumes for the party, okay?" Phil starts the conversation.

I sit back in the chair, unamused.

Phil rips his button-up apart to reveal a Superman shirt underneath. Yawn.

Next, Frank shows me his Joe Biden mask.

"Who am I?" He wants me to guess.

I vibrate my lips to act like this is so hard.

"Um, Joe Biden?" I answer.

Frank looks disappointed. "Shit the lady at Walmart was right, this is too easy. I'll get a new costume."

"I'm so winning that costume contest," Phil boasts. "Five hundred dollars, you know what I could do with that?"

"Blow it on whichever one of Morgan's friends that you can bag that night?" Frank guesses, slapping his friend's hand.

I roll my eyes. "Morgan's friends are all taken. If you're talking about the girls she just hired, good luck."

"Oh? You've tried?" Phil asks, intrigued.

"No, but I met them. They're all airheads, I think they're even dressing up as 'slutty zombies' or something-"

"Monster High Dolls, actually!" Frank confirms with a quickness.

When Phil and I look at him questionably, Frank clears his throat.

"I checked their job's profile, what, they're hot?" He sinks in the chair across from mine.

"Speaking of hotties..." Phil alludes to the framed picture of Morgan.

"Don't even." I growl at him, trying to snatch the photo but he passes it to Frank who gives it to me anyway.

"You're a lucky man, I've told you this before." Frank says, hitting his vape.

"When are we getting an invite to the wedding, bro?" Phil gives me a hard time. He chucks the foam basketball at me and we start a game on my floating net on the otherwise empty wall.

"I'll keep score." Frank says like usual.

I roll my sleeves up and assume I get ball first since it's my court and I'm better.

"Yeah, man, you know she can't wait forever." Phil adds his two cents as I score on him.

"One - zero." Frank tells us the score out loud.

"She won't have to." I let them know.

Phil pauses on defense and gets excited with Frank.

"Do I hear wedding bells?" He gasps at me, trying to steal the ball.

I step back and shoot a jumper.

Frank logs another point when it goes in.

I suck my teeth at them both. "Morgan isn't rushing to walk down the aisle, alright?"

"It's either that or a baby, bro." Frank nods at Phil's statement.

A baby?

"What is with you two?" I stop at the imaginary free-throw line, letting Phil steal the ball from my hands.

He dunks it and celebrates obnoxiously, earning a cold glare from me.

He smacks his lips. "What's your costume anyway?" He asks me, changing the subject.

"I don't know, yet." I pop my shoulders.

~~~

"Mister and Misses Smith." Morgan tells me.

"Oh." I reply, bobbing my head. "Huh."

She steps out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in her mouth and laughs. "What?"

I remove my work clothes to get ready to shower before the event tonight.

"Nothing, I just expected, like, something corny." I laugh, stepping out of my shoes.

Morgan flicks water at me on the bed and then disappears to rinse her mouth out.

She walks across the floor to her walk-in closet to find something to wear. Her eyes are on her wardrobe but I can't take mine off of her ass. She's teasing me, wearing nothing but a pink bra and matching thong.

"When are Jack and Kailyn supposed to land, do we need to pick them up from the airport?" She yells from the closet.

"No, they'll Uber, I let them know where the key is if we're not back in time."

"You trust them that much?" She sounds more impressed than inquisitive.

"Aheh," I chuckle, removing my belt. "well, now I'm nervous."

Morgan peeks out of her closet. "Which one?" She shows me a blue dress or a green one. I know enough by now to know the right answer is blue, it brings out her eyes. Plus, she doesn't even like green clothes, she thinks they're ugly.

"Blue." I answer, having to do a double take as she removes her bra to try it on.

"Wait." I get up.

"What?" She looks scared, thinking something's wrong.

I take the dress from her hands and throw it onto the bed.

Morgan giggles, seeing me stalk closer to her.

I laugh, too, and chase her around the small closet island as she tries to run.

I pin her down on the pink velvet chaise, though, and lock our fingers over her head.

She smells like amber and black cherrywood. Delectable, as always.

"Don't look at me like that." Her girlish voice rings.

"Like what?" I ask, staring over her flesh.

She squirms under the weight of my body and chews her lip.

"Like that." Her tone grows more sultry. She knows she wants it as bad as I do.

"Like what?" I remain playing dumb. I cup her breasts in my hands and lower my mouth to her panties.

She looks down at me with lust in those goddamn beautiful eyes. They could make me sin.

"Like, sexy." She giggles still, not even realizing she's starting to twirl her hips in my face. It's an invitation, and I accept, pressing my fingers against the fabric of her panties.

She swallows hard and closes her eyes.

"If you think I'm being sexy it's just because you think I'm sexy." I tease, leaving a kiss on her inner thigh.

"Mm, Chris." She drives me wild.

"Please don't punish me for making you wait. You know I can't stand the teasing. Well, unless fucking me is the punishment, then do it." She breathes out. I like the longing, the begging, the desire.

But two voices in our bedroom make me push the closet door shut so we can make ourselves decent.

"Hello!" My little cousins shout with excitement.

"Ugh." I squeeze my eyes shut and wish they'll go away.

"What are they doing here already?" Morgan wonders.

I shrug, tossing her a robe.

When I stand, I toss my head back, realizing my dick is hard.

Morgan laughs at my plight, thinking this is funny but blue balls in no joke.

"I'll go, you handle that." She says with a kiss to my cheek as she exits.

"Where's Chris?" I hear Kailyn ask after Morgan shuts me in the walk-in.

"WhErE's ChRis," I mock her. Damn it, all I needed was five fucking minutes. I've never hated my little cousins more than right now.

I sit down on the chaise and have to result to ancient times when I was just a young boy and all I knew was my hand and imagination.

~~~

"Hi!" Morgan shrieks at Izzy once she opens the door to let us in her gender reveal party.

"Get out the way, Juan!" Izzy shoves her brother so she can be front and center to greet us.

"It's a boy," I say to Izzy, handing over a card. "I know it is, just tell me. Please."

Izzy rolls her eyes at me playfully before hugging me.

"Izzy, you're huge." I say in shock. She wasn't like that last time I saw her, a couple weeks ago.

Morgan slaps me with the back of her hand to my gut.

"No, it's okay, I am." Izzy laughs. "Follow me. Lee is on the pool table with the guys-" before she can even finish that sentence, I go find the guys.

I run back to kiss Morgan's cheek and take her jacket.

"Aww!" Izzy squeals as I run back to the den.

~

"I'm not saying I want you to be broke, but I do love taking your money!" I brag about winning another game of pool.

"Man." Jabari vibrates his lips and coughs up fifty bucks.

"Who got next?" Juan, Izzy's older brother, asks the room.

None of the men want to go against me. Again.

I sit back and count my money. I love money.

"Here." Lee says, offering me another beer.

"This is what a gender reveal is supposed to be like: drinking and kicking back. Fuck all that baby games and shit." Juan speaks up through his Spanish (Mexican) accent.

I nod my head and agree.

"The girls probably out there trying to make each other say 'baby'." Jabari explains one of the tips of the game.

"Ah, give me your pin." My competitive side comes out.

He loses. So far that's my sixth pin, these guys are suckers. It's the easiest game— usually played at baby showers— you simply have to not say the word "baby" or else someone takes your clothes pin and whoever has the most by the end wins. And that will be me. Isabella's family has given out some good gifts so far, I'm excited to see what I'll get.

"You got kids?" Juan asks Jabari.

"Hell nah. Not that I know of." JB makes everyone laugh. I just shake my head.

"Hurry up and have some, please, you know that's all Iz talks about." Lee suggests.

"Aha!" Jabari and I laugh in his pale face.

"No." I say as calmly as possible.

"Why not?" He asks me.

"Yeah, Chris, why not?" Lee's little bother, Kenji, picks on me.

"Out of everyone, you are the most established." Lee thinks out loud.

"I'd say." Jabari remarks with the beer to his lips.

"I just don't know if now's the time." I stall.

With all eyes on me, I feel cornered. Pressured.

"I mean, we tried. There's a lot going on. It's not like we're not ready." I make clear.

Everyone accepts my answer and returns to their side conversations, leaving me alone finally.

"Trust me, bro, once she gets pregnant, it's over." Lee vents, cracking open another beer.

"JB, why don't you and Jas have kids, you're already married?" I interrogate him.

He pulls the beer bottle from his lips and sighs. "I ain't ready for a kid. It ain't gonna do shit but make things worse between me and Jas."

"You think so?" I pry.

"Man I know so." Jabari blusters, angrily dropping his pool stick onto the table.

After he storms off, Lee pats my back. "Don't worry, guy, it isn't all bad. Izzy's super sensitive lately but at least we can still have sex."