Dedicated to OlowuBusolami 🤎 as promised, an update before 9pm haha

~~~

"There was something peculiarly gratifying about shouting in a blind rage until your words ran out. Of course, the aftermath was less pleasant. Once you'd told everyone you hated them and not to come after you, where exactly did you go?"

Chris Omar Vaughn

January

"Smile!" Cleo bossed.

"Aww!" She cooed at the photo shortly after taking it.

My smile immediately dropped and I went back to work.

She took a seat on my desk and ate a rice cake. Random ass snack.

"Thanks," she sang, "now I can update your employee ID."

"I'm only here for another month, Cleo."

"And? You can still have a good photo."

I laughed her off, trying to concentrate.

"Wow," she suddenly pondered, "it's already been a whole month? Aren't you so happy we met?"

"No, not really." I joked with her.

She smacked her red lips. "Anyway. I'm still waiting for my gift since you got that raise."

I closed my MacBook and sighed. "I didn't even get myself anything, what do you think you're gonna get?"

She scoffed, jokingly hurt. "I thought we were better than that. Hey, how did you get that raise without you-know-who in the way?"

I shrugged. "Maybe 'cause I'm a hard-worker, Cleo."

"Eh, no. Gotta be something else." She was suspicious.

"Get the fuck out." I laughed, pointing to the door.

That's when Sabrina walked by and both Cleo and I stared silently as she passed.

"Ugh. Talk about a cameltoe."

"Cleo, you never said what she did to you?"

Cleo's face fell. "I just hate her."

"Well as long as there's a legit reason." I was sarcastic and Cleo flipped me off for it.

"I'll see you later, Terminator." She was corny on her way out.

A few minutes later, my door opened again. I was supposed to be on break and Cleo knew that when she left, usually she puts the 'do not disturb' sign on the door.

Sabrina walked in, surprising me.

She locked the door after her and walked over to my desk in a pair of shiny black boots.

"Mr.Vaughn," she talked quietly, "I've been thinking about you all day."

"Tsk tsk. What did I tell you about this hair, let it down?"

Okay, okay, I'm caught. So, maybe after realizing I was a little too hard on Sabrina at the party, I saw her that next workday and apologized. She opened up to me about how she had liked me since the second she saw my profile on her dad's desk months ago.
I understood that it was nice of her to go out of her way to convince her father I was the one he should give the raise to. I was thankful.
I explained that she just came off a little too strong especially for me who had just gotten out of s relationship. She consoled me even when I didn't open up and go into detail, but I can acknowledge that she was there for me. Sabrina went on to say that we could take things slow. She suggested I do need to move which I can agree on, not that I really want to right now anyway. Seeing that it's been a couple of months, though, I thought "what the hell?" So we went out for Chinese. After that, she took me to The Sinclair where she had a room and I asked no questions about it. At first we were just drinking and playing a card game, next thing I know, she was sucking my dick. I felt bad, but not really, I didn't touch her. Besides, I'm sorry, but I needed that relief. It's been a while. It didn't help me to get over Morgan, and it wasn't the best head I've gotten by far, but — that's it actually, that's all I got.
I am single. Yes, my heart is with Morgan Ann, but I am single.

"Look, Sabrina, I can't keep doing this."

She paused on the floor between my legs and looked at me like she'd never been rejected before.

"I'm sorry?"

I swallowed. "I don't feel right moving up just because you like me."

"You're too cute." She pushed her hair back and reached for my belt.

I pushed her hands off. "I don't wanna take advantage of you."

That wasn't entirely true, I didn't care about her at all, but I didn't want my hard work to be for nothing - getting recognized by her father just because she puts in a good word for me.
At least with Reuben, Morgan told him I was actually good at what I did and he got to see that for himself. She saw the door but I opened and walked through it. Sabrina, on the other hand, didn't give a fuck about what I did and made her father consider me for the raise anyway.
Their relationship was still weird to me, it's like he had no choice but to cater to her every wish or else, but I tried to not think about that too much. Although, Cleo's theories about the cult — Devils— and that Edward man left me with a bunch of questions. . .

"Oh, sweetie," she scoffed. "I want to be taken advantage of. Just sit back and let me take care of you."

~~~

I stepped out of the shower and covered my lower body with a towel.

The bathroom was so steamy I had to step out and dry off in my bedroom.

"—leave a message after the beep." The machine instructed for the umpteenth time.

Beep!

"Hey, Morgan, it's me again. You said we needed to talk and completely ignored me ever since. I'm getting worried, to be honest. I tried calling Teddy but he won't answer, either. Maybe he's mad at me 'cause of you, I don't know? Uh, Mom said she hasn't seen you around; did you really go back to Arizona? Just.. call me back when you're ready, okay? I lo— bye."

That was my fifth message in the past two days to Morgan. Maybe I was just too in my head, thinking she's mad after hearing Sabrina's voice on the phone, but I was worried.
Mostly I just wanted to hear her voice and I don't care if it's in an argument, or not.

Once dry, I pulled on a pair of briefs then some socks.

My phone vibrated on the stand with a text message from JB. It read:

Still no sign of morgan ... I'll keep looking brodie

What the fuck, I thought. Where could she be? Arizona, right? Had to be. But why would she disappear without telling anyone?

I didn't doubt that she left just out of spite. Just so happened to leave after that phone call. If I heard another man's voice in the background as we talked on the phone, I'd be pissed. If space is what she needed, I'd give it to her, just wanted to make sure she's safe first, though.

Jasmine texted me, explaining that she hadn't seen her best friend at Pilates, the spa, or hair salon in weeks. That's definitely not like Morgan.

Jasmine said, though, "Maybe she's just not doing all of that since she doesn't have anyone to impress anymore." That made me feel both sad and good about myself.

I asked Jas over text about Teddy and she replied:

Oh... you haven't heard? I'm sorry

I hung my head and mourned.

Teddy had died from a heart attack, they said. How unfortunate at his early age. Gone too soon, I'd miss him.

Since Teddy was all Morgan had left in regards to Malcolm, I made sure JB and my father kept an eye out for him. Just in case.

Either way, I'm sure she's fine. We hadn't heard from Malcolm for a while and that was before I even left.

My phone rang and I got excited, thinking it was someone from home with word on Morgan.

No. It was just Cleo.

"Yes, Cleo?"

"You don't sound so happy to speak to your favorite sister."

"I'm an only child."

"You're no fun. So, ya ready?"

"For?"

"Bar crawl?"

"Cleo, no. I'm tired."

"It is eight o'clock, dude."

"Exactly." I finished getting dressed, keeping the phone on speaker.

I said, "Look, I just don't feel like going out."

"You're not still depressed over Morgan, are you? Dude, she's probably, like, on vacation or something. I mean, you did piss her off on the phone."

"Not helping." I grumbled, slamming my dresser closed.

"Sorry, sorry. Stay positive, she's probably just giving you space to move on which is whyyyy you should come out with me tonight!" I could hear Cleo smiling.

"You just want a wingman."

"Exactly!" She beamed. "See you in a few, we can walk to V street from your house, right?"

"Yeah," I let her know. "And, hey, can you dress normal for once?"

~

"That is not normal." I said, looking over Cleo's outfit.

"It so is!" She claimed, posing awkwardly in my mirror.

"Cleo... no." I shook my head.

She had two space buns, her signature red lipstick, no other makeup except winged eyeliner, fishnets, knee-high pink platform Converse boots, a denim mini skirt, a matching tube top she probably made herself from the same fabric as the skirt, and a pink furry coat thing.

"This is fashion, what do you know?"

"I know that you constantly try to embarrass me." I said, pushing her out of my house.

Cleo and I walked to V street where all the bars were in Port Ember. Everyone who was anyone spent their weekends on V street, bar hopping, at a lounge, and/or eating at one of the many restaurants. This one jumbo slice place literally had the best pizza and it was so cheap, super convenient for drunk nights. Cleo had brought me out here one other time before tonight and I can't lie, it was cool. All we did was go to a bar and eat wings and watch the game, but still.

"See, this isn't so bad, right?" Cleo made sure I was having a good time.

I relaxed my jaws and tense shoulders. "I guess not."

"It's cold." Cleo complained, looking at me like I was supposed to give her my jacket.

"Don't look at me, I didn't tell you to wear a skirt in the middle of January."

"You suck."

The two of us entered a bar, this one wasn't crowded like the others, I could move around without worrying about bumping into someone and having to fight if they got crazy.

"One Amaretto sour, please." Cleo ordered a drink.

"And for you, friend?" Asked the bartender.

I said, "Dark and stormy, please."

Cleo looked at me with shock. "Rum and ginger beer? Nasty, but I can see that for you."

"Oh, please, you got sweetened Sprite with some cherries."

She popped one of her dyed blonde eyebrows. "How do you know what's in it? Pretty gay drunk."

I laughed out loud. "Morgan used to love them. That, and orange crushes."

"I love when you talk about Babygirl, tell me more!"

"No, that's enough." I pushed her face away from mine when the bartender gave us our respective drinks.

Cleo took a sip and then scoped the scene. "See anyone cute?"

"Not at all."

She stomped her foot. "Work with me here, they can't all be tens."

"Tell me about it."

"Huh?" She asked what I meant by that.

Shit. I almost slipped up and told her about my encounter with Sabrina. Okay, encounters. Yes, plural.

"Nothing, nothing," I played it off with a toast. "Drink."

The night went on and Cleo got a little more drunk than I'd like, and I say that because I didn't want to have to carry her ass back to my place. It's bad enough my neighbor thinks we're a couple because of how much Cleo comes over to bother me during the week.

"I'm going to the bathroom, okay?" I yelled over the music.

Cleo partied on the couch with a group of her friends who met us here.

"What?!"

"I'm going— nevermind." I walked off, pushing my way through the sea of people as the bar had picked up in the last hour.

Dispersing from the urinal, I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket. It was a text, from an unknown number:

Wyd Mr.Vaughn

Of course I figured out who it was then, Sabrina, the only one who calls me that. I think to her it's sexy, but I don't like it, I am not my father.

I ignored her message and she sent another:

I'm lonely... and horny and I need you to come over and put your cock in my throat

Get a load of this girl.

I couldn't respond to that, she's a different breed. Normally I liked a girl who knew what she wanted but goddamn I am not that interesting. She has this, like, weird fixation.

When I exited the bathroom, I ran into Cleo who was holding hands with the intern.

"Oh, there you are," she exclaimed. "I was looking for you. We're going to get out of here, wanna come?"

"No, I'm ready to leave, too."

"Hot date with your left hand?" She teased.

"Ha, no, and it's my right. Thanks."

"Thanks." She mocked me. "Well, text me when you get home."

And I did text Cleo, except I didn't go home. Not right away. . .

"When are you going to let me sit on that beautiful face of yours? As good as it is, I'm going to get lockjaw if I keep blowing you." Sabrina's pitchy voice was like nails on a chalkboard. I looked over my shoulder at her lying flat on the hotel bed and curled my face in disgust seeing that she didn't go clean herself, wash her face, brush her teeth, or anything. And she's a spitter— not a swallower— that was a whole turn off in itself, after the fact, just ruined the sheets and carpet.

Speaking of beautiful faces, the longer I looked at my boss's daughter, the uglier she got. She's not ugly per se, just rough on the eyes. Like, it's not all there. Like, in your head it sounds good when you take the best features of random women and put them together. I think that's what Sabrina told her doctor, to give her someone's lips and a nose like another women and lifted eyebrows like this lady. All fake, like Cleo said. Sometimes less is more.

Once decent and back to my senses, I stood and addressed Sabrina.

My eyes scanned the room for her clothes, but all she had was one open suitcase full of lingerie and weird cosplay face masks. Ignoring that, I threw her a complimentary robe found hanging on the bathroom door so she could cover herself up before I had this talk.

"Is this the part when we cuddle?" Her swollen lips curled into a smile.

"Absolutely not." I rubbed my palm over my mouth and chin.

Clasping my hands together, I said, "We should've never done this, and it stops now."

"Excuse me?"

I stopped my whole body from moving because I needed to take a second and regroup before cussing.

After a deep inhale, I looked Sabrina directly in her grey eyes and repeated, "This is done."

"I don't think so."

Oh I get it, I'm being pranked.

My eyelids flickered as I mentally shut down, frustrated at her inability to grasp a simple concept.

"You don't get a say. It was a statement; I'm leaving." I scoffed, turning to walk out.

"You can't." She nearly screamed after me.

"Watch me." I continued towards the door.

I struggled to unlock all of the hatches and locks on the door.
By the time I was on the one, Sabrina was standing just feet away from me, staring at my back, I could feel her.

"I'll tell Daddy." I think she tried to threaten me.

I threw my head back and slowly rotated my body so I was facing her.

"Please do."

She made a face like she wasn't expecting me to say that.

I added. "I don't care about the raise, he can fuckin' dock my pay. I'm only here for another four weeks, then I'll never have to see you again."

Sabrina's lips started to quiver, eyebrows furrowed, or at least it looked like they were arching in, can't tell because of all the Botox she doesn't get forehead wrinkles.

But then she started to smile and step closer. "I have you right where I want you. You can show yourself out now, but next time I want you, I will have you."

I looked to the ceiling and then scratched my eyebrow with my keys in my hand, dangling in my face.

"Yeah, why don't you go rinse your mouth out." I barked, forcing the door open. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

As I made my descent in the elevator, I read some missed texts from Cleo:

So drunk lmaooo

I miss ash gonna go downtown aand find him don't wait up ?!?!,

If u get bored and start drinking just call Babygirl back and leave her another voice message telling her how you feel #yolo

Why did I just hashtag in a text lmfao XD 

Ok bye I'm so drunk

I shook my head at all of her drunken messages.

I could use a drink myself, I thought.

When I stepped out of the elevator, I noticed a sign with an arrow leading to the bar/restaurant down the hall past the ballroom.

The restaurant was closed for the night but the bar was open per the bartender waiting on a down-and-out man.

Judging by the way his eyes were blank staring into the glass, I wasn't the only one going through something.

I groaned loudly, needing to get that off my chest, and enter the dimly lit bar finally. Heads turned, having heard me before seeing me.

The barstool scratched the floor as I dragged it from under the counter to take a seat, two away from the spaced out brute in the white collared shirt. What a square. Probably some rich exec here after a long night of cheating on his wife like the guys Cleo always bags on.

I dropped one foot, then the next, and then put my palms flat on the bar. Leaning forward, I got the bartender's attention.

"Can I please get a Goldrush?" I stressed the urgency of the matter. If I didn't get alcohol in my system in the next minute I probably would've stormed back up to Sabrina's and really let her have it, not caring that her Daddy runs the company. You know how desperate you gotta be to give someone head multiple times with nothing in return? Like, Morgan — Jesus fuck, I'm bringing her up again— loves sucking my dick just to please me, but what the fuck is Sabrina getting out of it? Wait. What is Sabrina getting out of it?

The bartender nodded and quickly began whipping up the bourbon shot.

"No, no. Don't make that shit. Get him a Negroni." The pantsuit guy spoke up.

My eyebrow immediately raised with suspicion.

I settled in my seat and shook my head. "Buy me a drink all you want, I'm not going back to your place."

"You're not really my type. And if you didn't want anyone know you're stressed the fuck out, don't walk in here moaning and groaning."

Touché.

"Well I've had a long night," I paused to dig in my pocket and retrieve my wallet to throw my card down. "and something tells me work will be even longer."

Fucking Sabrina. I hate Sabrina.

One more month, I mentally reminded myself.

"Tell me about it," he said, finishing his drink. "if that's the worst of your problems, I'll gladly take them."

I accepted the Negroni from the bartender, Raul, after the Goldrush and planned on consuming both. I needed it. The Negroni looked promising, though.

"Ha." I laughed slightly at the stranger and swirled the glass in my hand.

Seeing as this guy was a complete stranger who I'd likely never see again, I decided to let it all out.

"I fucked my uncle's girlfriend— well, she wasn't really his girlfriend. She didn't like him, see, but it was weird, complicated. Whatever." My voice trailed off at the end there.

I tapped my short nails against the lowball glass and expected him to turn away and change his mind about buying me that drink.

"I'm fucking the owner's daughter of this hotel. Beat that." He surprised me.

I swallowed the last of the Goldrush and eyed the Negroni.

I sucked in air and prepared myself for the words that wanted to come out next.

"We fell in love then she got pregnant and got rid of the baby." I think I had him beat.

It was hard to say out loud, I don't think I've accepted it yet, or even thought about it too much since leaving.

White collar said, "I think I sold my soul tonight. Shit was in Latin so who the fuck knows?"

More cult shit, hell no. What's with these people?

I looked at him funny, wondering if this was all a coincidence? Him selling his soul, Sabrina and the masks, Cleo claiming her father has ties with some secret society?

"Heard that about a few people here... what's up with that?" I had to know. The dark liquor bringing out my curiosity and more talkative side.

The guy stopped rubbing his temples. He said, "Stay far away from that shit. Or I'll have to kill you," and laughed. I almost took him seriously but knew it couldn't be anything like that.

I chuckled myself and gulped down the Negroni. It burned.

"Yeah," I hissed from the drink. "my friend, Cleo, mentioned it."

"Cleo?" He tapped his knuckles on the bar. "Why does that sound familiar?"

I laughed. "Trust me, you couldn't forget her. Lesbian, super annoying, yea tall, black hair? Eh, you probably wouldn't know her, she's not from here. She, uh, used to live downtown, hooked on drugs."

He laughed, too. "I knew as soon as you said annoying. Met her once. She was cool with my brother until she left or some shit?"

"Your brother? Aiden? Slash?" I couldn't remember the name she mentioned.

"Ashton." He confirmed. Ohhh.

Man, Cleo's not gonna shut up once I tell her I found her long lost friend.

"Yeah. What happened to him, she's been tryna call him?" I asked, ripping my eyes off of the guy to signal the bartender for another Negroni.

White collar asked, "She can't get through?"

I told him no, that she'd been calling nonstop.

"Yeah, dead people can't use phones." He said, making my body freeze. And I was just all excited too, ready to run this information in Cleo's face.

Well what the fuck do I say to that?

"The girl I was telling you about, she just lost her family, too. I'm sorry."

"Damn. And people call this life. The good life. Yeah fuck outta here." He grumbled, dropping the glass onto the bar.

I watched him groom his facial hair, looking — not uncomfortable— but stiff at this conversation and I'm sure it's not easy, him losing his brother.

"It's not all bad. I mean, it has been since I moved but when I was with her, shit was good you know?" I reminisced, hating how much space she took up in my mind, but unable to help it.

And that's the truth, she made life better, worth waking up in the morning. Now, the days just roll over and I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

"Easy for you to say," he snickered. "Since it's so good, why not go back? Why her?"

I shrugged, trying to explain the logic. "Oh, you know how it is. Everything's good when it's good but when it's bad, it's the end of fucking world. Seems like things would just be easier for everyone if you weren't together."

That shit actually kinda made me sad, saying it out loud. Everyone always talks about the universe, how if you're kind and open, good things will happen well I did that. I was a good fucking boyfriend, a good fucking person in general, and the one thing I want most in the world— her— I just can't fucking have. And I refuse to sit here and wallow in that "I don't deserve her" shit 'cause I do. And if we don't, for whatever reason, belong together then whoever she's supposed to end up with better be God, Buddha, or Muhammad themselves because there's no living, breathing being on this Earth better for Morgan than me.

He nodded. "Fuck everyone."

A many of many words, clearly.

I raised my glass. "Fuck everyone." I drank to that.

Fuck Sage. Fuck Malcolm. Fuck Sabrina. Fuck her father. Fuck this headache coming on.

I looked at the time on my phone and blinked the blur away.

I stretched once standing and told myself I was ready for bed.

"Chris." I finally told him my name, too bad it was at the end of the conversation, though.

His knuckles collided with mine since I didn't do typical white man handshakes. "Jackson."

Huh, and here I was calling him "stranger" and "white collar guy." He didn't seem so bad, though, far from what I expected when I first stumbled into the bar.

"I don't wanna be all in your business but take it from me, you got a girl upstairs you should be up there instead of buying strangers random drinks. She won't always be around one day. Or, you won't." I offered a last piece of advice before patting his back. I didn't like when people touched me like that but he seemed like he needed to hear that from someone also going through shit.

Besides, he should be up there getting some from his girl before that shit blows up in his face and he has to result to getting blown by some random big-mouthed, spoiled, dirty— I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I don't even mean to go in on Sabrina like that. Yes I do. Okay, shit. What was I trying to say?