Wei Ying was moved to the Jingshi the next day. He was feeling much better, but he needed to be closer to his family, especially because of the trauma that he knew Li XiWang must be suffering.

She was being extra helpful, asking for permission not to attend classes just so she could stay by Wei Ying's side.

Wei Ying slept more than anything else, his body slowly recovering. Jiang Cheng made himself available at every opportunity, just sitting beside him, even while he was asleep.

Lan Zhan stuck like glue. Their routine stayed mostly the same, until a few days passed. Wei Ying was much stronger now. He could sit for a few hours at a time, and slowly, slowly, they began to heal from that terrible experience.

One morning, Wei Ying woke first, stretching tentatively, working out the kinks. Lan Zhan opened one golden eye to observe him.

Wei Ying beamed magnificently, and Lan Zhan couldn't help but reciprocate, upon which he was kissed enthusiastically.

"Is Wei Ying feeling better?" His deep voice never failed to bring shivers down his spine.

"Do you know something, Lan Zhan?" He grinned mischievously at his husband.

"What?" Lan Zhan eyed him carefully, because a playful Wei Ying meant trouble.

"Do you know how much I love you?"

"Mn."

"So tell me?"

Lan Zhan blushed, his ears turning that delightful shade of pink.

"Can tell Wei Ying how much I love you."

"Really?" Wei Ying straddled his waist, wriggling his hips...

Lan Zhan flipped them over, carefully cradling his body so Wei Ying would not hurt more.

"Mn."

"Lan Zhaaan! You have to tell me properly. Give me something more..." Eye brows waggling, plump red lips pouting sweetly.

Lan Zhan bit him, licking and kissing his lips until he was too affected. He mimicked his husband's position, sitting comfortably, golden eyes blazing with love.

Wei Ying could not explain the tears that suddenly started to fall. Lan Zhan was immediately alarmed, tried to get off him, but Wei Ying managed to sit up. He threw his arms around his neck, refusing to let go. Lan Zhan held him just as tightly, worried.

"Is Wei Ying in...pain?"

"No," he hiccuped. "I just...I could see...how much you love me...and I love you just as much. But...we nearly lost each other."

"It is okay. Wei Ying is alive."

"I know...but I don't know!" He wailed, crying more.

Lan Zhan understood. There was always a wild kind of fear; he felt it too. Just the thoughts of separation instigated a madness that couldn't be beared. He always tried to ignore those feelings, a constant worry since their longest time apart. No one could understand it as well as he did, in fact, he wished he didn't.

His robes were soaked, but he didn't care. Wei Ying was more important, and he had to make him understand.

"Wei Ying."

Wet lashes blinked against his neck.

"Huh?" He felt dazed, the outpouring of grief draining his strength. He didn't want to move from this warmth, the comfort that only Lan Zhan could give him.

"I love you." He kissed him deeply, laying him down. Lan Zhan kissed his wet eyes, his nose, his damp cheeks, and then finally his lovely lips.

Silver eyes stared back at him, the pain and doubts ebbing away, leaving only affection and love.

"Love only Wei Ying." He looked deeply into his soul. "Together."

Wei Ying kissed him back.

"Together."

******

Jiang Cheng sat at the table in the Hanshi, feeling out of sorts. He wasn't really needed here; Wei Ying had enough people looking after him, even though he was strangely more clingy and emotional than normal, and that was saying a lot.

But it felt wrong to return to Lotus Pier, more so because his brother wouldn't be returning with him. Lotus Pier felt different when he was alone there. Mostly because neither his A-Jie or Wei Ying were there. The rooms felt emptier, the halls quieter, and lately, his own home felt... alien.

He couldn't put his finger on it, why he felt like that. Even the presence of his nephew did nothing to alleviate those feelings. Really, XiChen was the only place he felt comfortable.

He laughed to himself. XiChen...was his home. Only now, he was beginning to understand why Wei Ying didn't care where he lived, why he called Cloud Recesses home, and it had nothing to do with the geographical location. At alie

So he delayed going back, with one excuse after another. He had a feeling that XiChen knew him better than he knew himself. And was secretly pleased that Jiang Cheng didn't want to go back yet.

Loneliness was a terrible drinking partner.

And he could easily get used to the tea here. With or without Uncle Qiren.

*******

SiZhui fed the rabbits, attended  classes, ate and drank as normal, breathed in and breathed out. But he knew, inside his mind, and as a by product, inside his body, he was kind of... broken.

He could function, but his heart was otherwise occupied.

For a brief second, his Uncle XiChen's kind words had helped; for SiZhui did indeed blame himself. Nobody was as good as himself for beating him up.

The bad thoughts, always strongest at night, started accumulating, weakening his attempts to be okay. The long and short of it was, he thought he had failed his father.

Nobody said anything to him, that was the worst part. He knew he would feel so much better if at least one of his fathers yelled at him, or told him or passed some form of punishment. But none of these things happened, and he was left feeling...nothing.

He felt smothered by kindness. Everyone had something nice to say to him, and he was at a loss to explain why. He felt useless too, and really needed to talk to someone.

But no one understood.

******

Li XiWang was scared. Terrified, if she was honest. She woke up almost every night, stifling her own screams, afraid of waking other people, afraid of what they would say, afraid of her own shadow. But more than anything else, she was scared that she would not be around her father, when the next attack happened.

That was one certainty, and the only way to beat it was to face it head on.

She went back to classes the next day, doubling her efforts. When she wasn't around her fathers, she spent the time refining her spiritual instrument, practicing different techniques.

She was going to be prepared.

******

Wei Ying knew there was something wrong with both his children. And he worried that as a parent, he wasn't doing a good enough job. The problem was, neither was particularly vocal. If he asked them head on, what was wrong, they denied it, fake smiling because they didn't want him to know how badly they were affected.

But Wei Ying wasn't blind.

So one afternoon, he made sure Lan Zhan was free and they called SiZhui over.

Wei Ying had kind of explained to Lan Zhan, but it was hard because neither knew what the problem was, except that was one.

SiZhui sat awkwardly, drinking tea, watching both adults try not to look at him. He wasn't quite sure why he had been called here, but this was his fifth cup of tea, and there was no sign of... anything.

"The tea is nice."

"Mn."

"Yes, isn't it?" Wei Ying said, too brightly.

Another awkward silence.

Wei Ying took a deep breath.

"SiZhui, are you alright?" He held up his hand, to stop him repeating the same words as before. "Don't say yes, when it isn't true. We can tell. And we want to help you. Please. Talk to us!" Wei Ying begged.

SiZhui didn't know how to say what he was feeling. That was the problem.

"I...I think I'm waiting." He said, finally.

"For what?"

"I don't understand why you're not angry with me. I wish you would shout at me or tell me off, scold me, give me a punishment, anything!" He suddenly cried.

"But SiZhui, why would we do that?" The parents looked at each other blankly.

"Because I was there, and it wasn't even me who raised the alarm, I didn't get help. I didn't do anything, I just watched..." He started crying at the end.

Wei Ying pulled him closer, murmuring things to calm him down. He cupped his face, looking into those deep chocolate eyes.

"Listen to me, SiZhui. Bad things happen. They can happen at any time, or any place. And we are not in control of that. You are putting too much pressure on yourself, because you think, wrongly, that it was your fault. But how can it be?"

SiZhui searched his eyes for the truth, trying to see the lie and not finding anything other than love and sincerity.

"SiZhui, my wonderful son, please don't blame yourself. It's the same thing if I was to blame myself for not being more vigilant, for putting you and Li XiWang in danger-"

"No, father, that's not true!" SiZhui interrupted him, "she came up behind you! You didn't see her!"

"My point exactly, SiZhui. I didn't see her, and neither did you. Neither of us is to blame. Alright?" Wei Ying kissed his forehead. "Promise me something?"

"What, father?" SiZhui smiled, feeling much better for the first time in days.

"Promise me that you'll talk to me, to us," Wei Ying looked at Lan Zhan.

"Mn. Must talk."

SiZhui promised.

Wei Ying sighed, happy now. One down, two to go.

*******

Li XiWang knew something was up when both her fathers sat next to her, one on each side.
Lan Zhan went further by picking her up and putting her in his lap.

"Little rabbit, we want to talk with you." Wei Ying said, stroking her hair.

"About what?" She already looked scared.

"Why don't you go with SiZhui to feed the rabbits anymore?" Wei Ying asked, gently. He didn't want to upset her further but they needed to talk about this. "You don't play with your friends, you eat quickly and then go back to studying."

"What's wrong?" Lan Zhan asked her. His face was warm, someone she could trust.

"But fathers, how can I improve if I don't practice?" She asked, unsure, suddenly.

"But you are perfect, little rabbit. Other improvements come with time, but you have to make space for fun stuff." Wei Ying told her that with the surety of experience. "Making sure you can unwind is important, otherwise...it can get to be too much."

Her eyes filled with tears. "I'm not good enough. I need to get better, as soon as possible."

"Who told you that?" Wei Ying was shocked.

"Nobody." She mumbled, the extra moisture leaking from her eyes.

Lan Zhan held her little body closer, rubbing her back.

"Little rabbit, tell me everything." Wei Ying said, firmly. "Why do you think you have to be better?"

"Because... because I have to be ready. For the next time."

"Next time? What are you talking about?" Wei Ying was really confused. He made eye contact with his husband, raising a brow, but Lan Zhan shook his head.

"I want to be ready for the next time someone tries to hurt you. I will destroy them even before they get close to you."

Wei Ying could feel the tears gathering. His little girl thought she had to protect him. How heartbreaking was that?

"Li XiWang?" He waited for her to look at him. "Why do you think it's your job to protect me?"

"Because everyone else is so rubbish at it!" She exclaimed. "That's why I have to practice. I won't let anything happen to you again!"

"Nothing will happen to me." Wei Ying tried to say, but she put her tiny fingers over his mouth to silence him.

"That's not true, and you know it. Shall I give you a list?"

Wei Ying shook his head, worried now.

"If you think you have to protect him, then I am failing. Both as a husband and a father." Lan Zhan said sadly.

"That's NOT true! Lan Zhan! I don't think that at all!! How could you?" Wei Ying hugged both of them.

They were all crying now and this talk had gone in the totally opposite direction.

"How about this?" Wei Ying wiped his eyes again, frustrated that they kept watering. "What if we just promise to do our best for each other? Nobody should blame anyone for anything."

He picked up his little girl and hugged her tightly.

"You're only nine years old, little rabbit. I want you to do the things nine year olds do! That's what's normal, not trying to kill anything that comes near me!" He tried to calm himself. "Do you understand?"

She shook her head, now confused.

"Okay, let me put it this way: do you want me to be happy?"

She nodded.

"Then I want you to go back to what you used to do. I want you to play with your friends, I want you to spend your time with your family. I want you to have fun. Is that so hard?"

She sniffed, scrunching up her little nose. Wei Ying kissed it and she giggled.

"I'll try."

Great, Wei Ying thought. Now there was just his brother.

A/N

Woohoo! Turns out it wasn't as bad as I thought! I even wrote in the hospital, so here you go!

I'm so happy, and this one's also longer!

Have a great night, everybody.