In which two Captains have their own problems

It was a rather boring morning when the Police Corps rode along the walls. They had been given the task to check out and secure the break in Trost. Of course, this was the job of the Garrison, but somehow someone screwed up and the Military Police ended up with that particular mission.

Annie rolled her eyes at the chattering of her roommate Hitch and Marlo. These two always stuck together, gossiping or joking around. And it got on Annie's nerves.

"Will you two shut up already? You are being annoying", she hissed with an icy tone. While Marlo shrunk back (as did about everybody else in the hearing range), Hitch threw her a nasty glance. "Wow. I always thought you couldn't get any more bitchier, and still you did. What kind of stick do you have up your ass?"

"The kind that I will use to beat you dead with", Annie snarled.

Everybody knew better than to antagonize the short blonde any more, but apparently Hitch was going to try today.

However, before Annie could go through with her threat, a hand appeared out of nowhere and latched to a building corner.

A hand connected to an incredibly long arm.

"HEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYY!"
*SNAP*

*CRUSH*

Faster than anybody could react, a red blur suddenly shot towards them. With a heavy noise it crashed right into Marlo and Hitch, took both with it and flying them into the wall. With pained groans the two Corps Members lay on the floor, twitching only. The blur that hit them stood there laughing and apologizing half-heartedly. "Ah, Sorry, sorry. I didn't see you there."

"Who are you?!" Nile Dok shouted. The intruder turned, giving him a bright smile.

"I'm Monkey D. Luffy. The man who will become Pirate King!"

"Monkey D... you're that Pirate Erwin told me about", the Commander realized. He frowned at the mess that used to be his two soldiers. "Any reason you knocked my two soldiers out?"

"Ah, I got kind of lost and then I saw you", the young man replied, "And I just wanted to come here and ask you whether you want to become my Nakama."

"Nakama?" Dok wondered. "I don't know-"

"NO!"

Nile turned to the one who interrupted him. It appeared Ms. Leonhart was particularly cranky today.

"Awwww. Why not?" Luffy whined.

"Because I don't want to", Annie growled.

"But I asked you already, and you said you had a mission to finish. But then you said you're ending that mission, so I thought I could ask you again."

"Whatever I said, it doesn't mean I'll become your Nakama. Scram."

"But I want you to be my Nakama!"

"I said: SCRAM!" With a quick motion, Annie grabbed the Pirate and thrust him into a nearby trash dumpster, slamming its lid shut. Then she got back on her horse and continued her way towards Trost, leaving the stunned Police Corps behind.

Luffy freed himself a moment later, shouting: "But you can't leaaaaaveeee! If you don't become my Nakama, Sanji will take away the Meat!"

-OoOoO-

"Speed Fighter?" Levi arched an eyebrow at the Skeleton.

"That's certain", Brook replied. "I have seen a lot of swordsmen by now. There are only two types: Strength Fighters like Zoro-san and Speed Fighters like me. Now you", he pointed his bony fingers at the shorter man, "You are a Speed Fighter. And this is exactly why I am going to show you some tricks."

"Mhm. I rather wish to learn something similar to Ackerman", the Captain grumbled, watching the Asian Girl chop down a few Titan Dummies.

"With the right preparations, anybody can fight as they wish", the skeleton replied matter-of-factly. "And I'm pretty sure I'm older than you, and young people have to listen to their seniors."

Humanity's strongest sighed. He never sighed this much ever since the Pirates arrived, but then again, maybe this were the first sings of alcohol poisoning? "As you wish, pops" he ground out between his teeth.

Brook's only reaction was a merry laughter before he got into his battle stance. "Now watch closely, Levi-san."

-oOo-

Kenny Ackerman, serial Killer and special unit of the Military Police, watched the two in the courtyard. The fact that the guy he raised to be a sadistic psychopath was now tamely learning sword techniques from a talking skeleton did not sit well with him.

His eyes searched for an answer for the kid's unusual behaviour, and he soon found it hidden under Levi's discarded coat. An empty flask.

Kenny arched his eyebrows as he opened the bottle and took a sniff. He had to put it down quickly to avoid getting light-headed from the smell alone. A note stuck to the container.

Rivaille. I know you motherfucker keep stealing my flask. Is it so hard to buy an own one? Of course noooot. You're the respected Captain of the Scouting Legion, you don't just go 'round buying bottles. You rather steal them from brittle old people.
You know what? Fuck you. I have filled it this time with the stuff Hanji keeps around for eye operations. Let's see whether you can still stand after downing it. Hah! That'll teach you!
Pixis

The criminal eyed the note again, then turned to watch Levi. He didn't seem to have any troubles keeping up with the skeleton. And the skeleton was fast enough to actually vanish from sight.

With a snort, Kenny turned back around and marched off. If he wanted to take out that snotty brat, he couldn't use any drugs.

Apparently, that guy grew resistant against anything that might have an effect on his system.

-OoOoO-

It was around noon when Annie awoke. Yesterday was a nightmare. Somebody claimed he's seen a Titan and the Police Corps, the Military Garrison and the Scouts spent most of the day and the night trying to find the Titan. In the end, they discovered it was the Cyborg Shipwright whose shadow looked like a Titan under the right circumstances.

With an angry grunt the blonde turned over on her back and pried her eyes open.

Only to look directly into the grinning face of Monkey D. Luffy. The Pirate was perched on top of her bed, feet on either side of her body.

"Hey! You're awake! That's nice!" he beamed.

"Why are you on my bed?" The petite girl questioned, ignoring the fact the guy just broke into the female's barracks and sat nearly on top of one.

"Do you want to become my Nakama?"

Annie closed her eyes and exhaled coldly.

Several moments later, she left her room to head for the showers. Luffy was left behind- with his arms knotted to the bedpost.

-OoOoO-

Kenny Ackerman watched Humanity's Strongest Soldier with a pair of binoculars from atop a building. He was just talking to Nami, but stood a few feet away from her and kept her hands in plain view.

"Paranoid much, Levi?" Kenny asked amused, "Ah, it might keep you alive though."

He watched as the Pirate swung her staff several times through the air. Just as he wondered what this was about, he heard a deep rumble overhead. With an uneasy feeling, he looked up.

"Oh", he muttered as he stared right into the heart of a giant black thunder cloud. "Bollocks."

KRATHOOOOOM

Levi whipped his head around in alarm. "That Thunder sounded very loud", he stated.

"Mhm, that's weird", Nami admitted, "I just wanted to demonstrate you a simple Thunder Trap, but it sprung before I wanted to trigger it."

"I take a wild assumption and guess I was supposed to trigger that Trap, right?" Levi questioned with narrowed eyes.

Nami acted upset. "How can you think such a thing of me? I would have thrown a stone or something." She shrugged. "Besides, it only hurts half as much when the target is airborne. If you were standing or- god forbid- connected to your gears; now that would have hurt."

"Any idea what might have triggered your wonderful trap for me?"

"No idea. I guess somebody didn't pay attention to where he was standing."

"I get somebody to check this out", Levi replied as he turned to go.

"Well, I'll get back to my crew too", the Navigator claimed.

"Please don't", the Captain's voice suddenly spoke up.

"Huh?" Nami turned around confused. She noticed him watching her, holding out his hand.

"I still need that", the man added.

"Need what?"

"My Wallet. You stuffed it into your shirt. I want it back. With all the money still inside."

-OoOoO-

Annie said inside the mess hall next to the still-talking Hitch. Today was actually a good day, because they had a piece of meat with their potatoes.

"What was that about this weird guy last time?" Marlo asked eventually, "You know, the guy that suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Hitch told me she'd seen him enter your room too."

The blonde arched an eyebrow. "He's just an idiot", she explained.

"Who're you talking about?" Luffy's voice suddenly asked. Moments later, the Strawhat sat on top of the table, right in front of Annie.

"Just a moron", the blonde replied, "Who keeps stalking me."

"What?!" The Pirate shouted, "Tell me who it is! I will beat him up!"

Marlo and Hitch eyed each other, so they didn't notice Annie taking the meat off their plates only to dangle it in front of Luffy.

"Strawhat. Catch!"

The Pirate immediately dove after the food as Annie threw it to the other side of the room. He caught it with no problem, inhaling it in an instant.

"Hey, that was funny! Do you have anything more?" He asked laughing. Annie was gone though.

One window was broken open.

-OoOoO-

Levi sat in his office, checking different papers. Or so he said. Truth was, he was merely hiding. Hiding from the Strawhat Pirates.

Yep. He. Levi Rivaille, also known as 'Humanity's Strongest' was indeed hiding from a nine-headed Pirate Crew.

The reason was simple: It was barely after noon and he was already out of booze. He couldn't risk stealing more from Pixis. That guy already started to guard his stash with a shotgun.

His door suddenly flung open, revealing the Captain of the people he tried to avoid.

"Huh? Captain Shorty?" Luffy wondered, "What are you doing here?"

"This is where I work", Levi replied with gnashed teeth. The 'Captain Shorty' tag the Pirate gave him hurt his pride a lot.

"Oh" There was a moment of silence, then: "What are you doing in the girl's rooms? Are you a pervert?"

Levi choked on his tea. He coughed and sputtered while swearing under his breath, before he turned to the Pirate again. "What makes you say that?"

"I was looking for that girl. I already asked her whether she wants to become my Nakama. So I have to be in the Girl's house, right?"

"What kind of Logic is that?!" "This is not the Dormitory for the Female soldiers", the Scouting Legion's Captain growled, "You are in the wrong place."

"Oh" Luffy blinked. "What are you doing there?" He asked pointing to the stacks of paper on his desk.

"Work", Levi answered bluntly. "Unlike you, I have to work for my pay."

"Then why don't you become a Pirate? You are pretty strong. I think you could make it."

"Why should I?"

"Because then you don't have to do anything", Luffy grinned. "You could be free to do whatever you want to!"

"Free?" The Scout snorted in disgust. "Freedom is life's greatest lie."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because there is no way for any person to do anything they want. There is no freedom."

"Then you are not trying hard enough", Luffy pouted.

"What?"

"If you become really, really strong, you can do everything you want." The boy's look turned serious. "Like eating all the meat."

"You're serious."

"You can also have all the adventures you want. And when you are finished, you can go to find the next one"

"Okay. That just now will be worth the load of lead I'm going to get."