Butterflies erupted in my stomach at the contact of our bare bodies. 

"Uh, Michael?" I fumbled with his hands that were now resting on my exposed waist.

"Hmmmm." 

"What exactly are you doing?" I asked stiffly.

"Being clingy." He giggled. 

"Can you be clingy when we're clothed?"

"But that's no fun." He stuck out his bottom lip, showing off a pout. I rolled my eyes and splashed him with a wave of the murky water.

I pulled myself out quickly and wrapped myself up with the towels that were conveniently placed on the edge. Even though it was dark and we weren't able to see farther than what was right in front of us, I still did things as if it was broad daylight. 

I picked up my bathing suit and tank top, not even bothering to put them back on since they were wet. I slid on my flip flops and turned back to Michael who was still in the water.

"Are you just going to stay in there all night?" I sneered. He started to climb the rusted ladder and I turned my back to him.

"Wasn't planning on it." He stated after draping a towel that sunk lowly on his hips. He threw his arm loosely over my shoulder and we headed back towards the house.

-

Michael lead me to the living room where we supposed everyone else had ran off to. I twisted the end of my towel and stuck it in my chest, now giving me free hands.

We stepped inside and I hid half of myself behind Michael, feeling somewhat awkward. Our presence was followed by a series of clapping and laughter.

"This doesn't look suspicious at all." Calum joked.

"Shut up." Michael snapped.

He was referring to the clothes in our hands and the fact that we came in later than everyone else. Even though we did literally nothing, I still looked down at the floor with hot cheeks. I was still soaked so, the water from the lake was dripping down the side of my cheek and off my legs. 

Michael left my side, heading down a hallway. I was suspecting that he was putting on the dry clothes he had.

I turned back to the group, who was now occupied by their phones or engaged in a small conversation. Ashton waved me over to his spot to which I followed. He stood up without saying a word to me and placed his hand on my shoulder.

"I'm getting Maddie some actual clothes. Please don't burn my house down, all jokes aside." 

I warily trailed behind him as he lead me up the stairs. His house was big, certainly not as big as Mrs. Louise's, or Michael's I should say, but still big enough to tell that his parents had money. Midway through my thoughts we stopped in front of a simple white door.

"I'll be right back." He said, pushing the door open to let me inside first. I nodded my head sat down on his bed.

His walls were a crisp white that matched his bedding and, just like Michael, he had a few band posters scattered along the walls. Picture frames decorated his dresser, but not many. A couple t-shirts were tossed on the floor here and there, but for the most part, he kept it cleaned up.

I turned my head towards the doorway were had Ashton reappeared. He was scrolling through something on his phone, looking focused on what he was reading. 

I watched him attentively as he pulled out a shirt and pair of sweatpants from his top drawer. He shoved his phone into his back pocket and had a puzzled look on his face. He stuck out the clothing items to me, which I took without hesitation.

"You alright?" 

He met my eyes with his own, dropping the look he had on his face.

"Yeah." He showed a faint smile. "And the bathroom is to the left." He nodded, sticking his hands in his front pockets. 

I got up and headed to the bathroom, locking the door. I dropped my towel and slipped the dry clothing over myself. He was tall, so everything was basically hanging off of me. I ran my fingers through my hair and flipped my head upside down to get the tangled mess into a bun.

I wandered back into Ashton's room to collect my tank top and phone. The sound of the door shutting made me look over my shoulder, to which I found him leaning against the door with his hands behind his back. 

"What's up?" I asked, giving him a perplexed look.

"Nothing." He had a dull smirk on his face, as if he knew something I didn't. I observed him as I stepped towards the door. 

"Comfy?" He asks, gesturing towards his clothes that I now had on. I looked down and I realized that this was the reason I was even in here.

"Yeah." I gave him a thin smile. "Thanks, by the way." I started playing with the ring on my right hand, not knowing what to say next.

"How has the past few weeks been without your mom? Must be fun."

How did he know about my mom going away? I definitely didn't remember telling him.

"Michael told me about it, in case you were wondering."

Question answered.

I shifted to where I was putting some of my weight into the wall behind me. 

"Weird, actually." I glanced up at him. "It's like there's a hole in my life, but not in a bad way. It's just like I'm missing a part of my day." I confessed. 

"I know what you mean, my parents are never around. Usually off doing whatever business related shit." He puffed, obviously bothered by it.

By this point I hadn't realized how close we were. I was pressed up against the wall with my arms folded across my chest. He stood in front of me with his hand supporting him right beside my head. 

I took in the placement that we were in and immediately felt flustered. 

"I'm, um, sorry to hear that." I managed to get out as I noticed him leaning towards me. He came only inches from my face, his head was tilted as he looked down on me. I didn't dare bring me head up any further in fear of being too close for my liking.

Before I could object, he leaned further down, pressing his lips to mine. I didn't kiss back, but I didn't pull away either. He was gentle, barely even putting depth into it. He broke away, rubbing the back of his neck with the hand that wasn't supporting him on the wall.

"I'm sorry, I just-"

"No, it's okay." I cut him off. "Let's just get back downstairs before everyone starts to worry." I said sheepishly. He nodded his head and reopened the door, motioning me out first.

I was actually terrible at these kind of things. I couldn't be mad at him because it was only a kiss and it was just an in the moment type of thing, but it certainly made things different. In all honesty, I didn't mind that it happened. But this bearing weight of guilt was starting to grow on me. 

-

"You alright?" I jumped at the sound of Michael's voice next to me. I was standing in Ashton's kitchen getting a glass of water. 

He pulled up the hem of my baggy shirt and wrapped an arm around my waist, tugging me towards him. My shirt fell back over his arm which made the action unnoticeable. 

"I'm fine." I disclosed. I rested my head on his shoulder, closing the space between us. He drew the same patterns on me that he usually does, making my guilt grow more.

"You can tell me you know." He mumbled.

"I know, I'm okay. I promise." I kissed his cheek and wiggled out of his grip before he could say anything.

-

It was 2am and we were just saying our goodbyes. After a series of hugs and thank you's, we headed off into Michael's car.

I buckled my seat belt and shifted awkwardly as he backed out. I stayed quiet, not really knowing what to say.

"Have a good time?" He finally broke the silence, looking in the rear view mirror trying not to hit anything. I cleared my throat and sat up straight.

"Uh, yeah. Did you?" I asked in remorse. He shifted back into drive, heading down the back road to my house. He kept his eyes on the road as he genuinely smiled. 

"I did." His smiled faded as he flicked his sight over to me, noticing that my hands were in my lap and my head hung low.

"Alright, what's going on?" He asked in a worried tone. "You never act like this unless something's wrong."

"Seriously. I'm okay."

"Maddie." He warned. I buried my face into my hands, my guilt practically eating me alive.

I knew I had to tell him whether I wanted to or not, but I couldn't hide it forever. It wasn't even really a big deal, it was a heat in the moment thing. I understood why it happened and knew it wouldn't happen again, but I just didn't know how he's react.

We aren't together. I didn't even think Michael really wanted to be anything "serious". I mean, we haven't even clarified if we liked each other that way, but it was obvious enough so I didn't think it needed to be said.

I took a deep breath, not knowing why I was so nervous to tell him Ashton kissed me. Maybe it was the fear of messing this up. Then again, I've had the same fear since day one of meeting Michael.

"You can't get mad." I exhaled, looking up at his faint scowl that he was making.

"Spit it out for Christ sake!" His tone was loud and grew anxious which was not making this any easier. He glanced over at me once and ran his fingers through his hair. "Sorry." 

"Ashton kissed me." I mumbled. I felt his car come to an immediate stop, which threw me off guard.

"He what?!" He yelled, turning towards me as his hands hit the steering wheel.

His actions made me feel irritated my not only him, but myself. Without a doubt, this is not the reaction I wanted. 

-

A/N:

hiiii, if you've read this far i just wanted to say thank you! also, i've been trying to update everyday, but i'm realizing quality is better than quantity so i think it'll start being every 2 or 3 days, but nothing major!

vote if you want more bc i wanna know!!!!!!

o o o what's gon happen, only i know :~~~)