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What Are We

Erin laughed as she and Brian discussed the days' lecture from the afternoon class. "And how about when Dr. Gaines was talking about low orbital projectiles and the citation in the text was fifty years off in the research." Brian added, only making Erin laugh further. She slapped another grade over one of Brian's student papers. She had proved to be an unbelievable graduate assistant. Erin was everything that Brian pined to fall in love with. She was lovely, she had a radiant smile and was quite intelligent. Erin was articulate and charming. Quite the extrovert and she had many friends around campus.

She was frightening to Brian because she had so many qualities he yearned for. Erin had never turned anything in late to him; in fact most of it was early. She had deep, intellectual conversations with him over his thesis work or over advanced equations and postulates from their classes. However, Brian was relieved that she had a boyfriend. Otherwise, there was no way in hell he would be able to be as comfortable around her as he was. As comfortable as Brian was with Erin when he met up with her on Fridays, he couldn't keep his mind from thinking about how wonderful it would be if she were his girlfriend instead. Sometimes, when he would listen to her talk; he would rehearse it all in his mind: the way he would take her stargazing outside of London, make her tea at his flat and watch the telly on a Saturday afternoon. The way he would put his arms around her and kiss her neck and hold her hand during walks around the lake. The way they would eat dinner together at his place and talk for hours before he would throw her down in his bed and give her the best sex she'd ever...

"Brian!" Erin repeated, seeing as he was in a trance, sweating and on the verge of breaking the pencil in his hand.

"Huh?" he asked, looking up to her with enormous eyes and a pale face. She laughed again.

"I said the girl in your math section writes Dr. May on all of her papers. Does she know you are a professor?" Erin asked.

"Oh, um....oh I...I don't guess she does." Brian laughed nervously. "Is it a bit hot in here?" He asked. Erin smiled that perfect smile of hers.

"No. I think it must only be you. You know, your hair's a lot longer than it was at the beginning of the semester." She said.

"Yeah, yeah it's um...it's taken on a mind of it's own really." He answered, signing off on a student permission form to add his class to their fall schedule. It was then that the phone rang, Brian answered it only to get yelled at on the other end. He held the receiver out from his ear, knowing Erin could hear it.

"Fr...Fre...Freddie! Calm down! I'm not....I'm..." he sighed. "I'm not bailing on practice! I know it's 4:30! Can you please give me twenty minutes? Fre...Freddie stop yellin'." And then it dawned on Brian. "Fred, how did you get this office number? You...you what? You can't call the university and ask for me! O...okay. Okay, Freddie. I promise. Twenty minutes. Yes. Okay. Yes, I'll bring beer. Okay, well I'll bring vodka too. Okay, goodbye!" Brian hung the phone up again and shook his head.

"Who on earth?" Erin questioned.

"Oh it's my bandmate. He's afraid I'm blowin' off practice for, in his words, 'science and stuff'." He answered laughing at Freddie's antics. "I told him to give me twenty minutes and then I would be on my way. Erin smiled.

"So you're in a band that actually takes the time to practice and those sorts of things?" she asked. Brian shook his head.

"Yes. I'm um, I'm starting to come with these...I don't know....these guitar riffs in my head and sometimes I have to record myself singing them back so I don't forget them. Or...or something else. I'll have these words that come to me and I have to write them down so I don't forget them." Brian explained with shining eyes.

"You enjoy it, yeah?" Erin asked.

"I do. I like it very much. I'm different when I pick up my guitar." Brian shared.

"You are? Like how?" she wondered a little confused but his statement. Brian gave her his best smile.

"Well, I wear a sweater not a shirt and tie." He laughed at his own comment sending Erin into a fit of laughter so sweet, so sincere that it made Brian want to completely ignore the fact that she had a boyfriend.

In Kensington, at the market that day; the air was moving and so were the sales. "Mary! Where does your friend find such fabulous clothes to sell?" Her booth partner Brenda asked, admiring the latest box that Mary had put together with Freddie. Mary looked at the silk blouse a little confused before Brenda folded it and laid it over the table.

"To be very honest with you, I think he takes things from his friends and hopes they won't notice." Mary confessed. Brenda laughed at her and rain her hand over the silk.

"He may be takin' stuff without them knowin' but most of the things sell quickly that you bring. This blouse won't make it through the afternoon I'm sure." Brenda said.

"I can't figure out who he took the dresses from. They were so beautiful you know but sadly, they were too small fro me." Mary sighed.

"Perhaps someone actually gives your friend these things?" Brenda said, admiring a jacket from the box. Mary thought about that for a moment.

"Well, maybe...but more than likely he takes things unknowingly." Mary said, knowing good and well Freddie had nabbed at least three shirts that weren't his.

"So, tell me. You and your friend. I've seen him here a few times at the stall a few rows that way with some guy that he seems to enjoy arguing with." Brenda laughed. "The guy that's with him is kinda' cute ya' know? But...what's goin' on with you and your so-called friend?" Brenda was dying to pick Mary's brain. She darted her eyes away from her friend and turned a little pink. Mary shrugged and began folding another garment.

"Well...I don't know. We hang out a lot. We do things. He modeled his velvet trousers for me." Mary shared.

"He did what!?" Brenda asked, a bit perplexed by what she had heard.

"Freddie got a new pair of velvet trousers and the other day he put them on and...modeled them I guess you would call it." Mary said. Brenda laughed.

"Oh my god, he's certainly just a friend then." Mary cracked a slight smile. She didn't tell Brenda that she and Freddie had spent plenty of time on his couch in his flat watching the telly and petting the cat. She also didn't share with her that she had laid across his bed while Freddie put on a fashion show for Mary, full of laughter at the fact that Freddie thought he was fabulous in everything he pulled out. She also didn't tell Brenda about how she had gone to the library and checked out every book or magazine article written about Rudolf Nureyev only to leave them on his table as a surprise. She gave Brenda another smile and shook her head.

"Yeah, yeah he's just a friend." She reassured Brenda. The truth was, Mary had spent much time with Freddie. They had awkwardly flirted with one another, cumbersomely held hands and their kisses were more friend-like than lover-like. However, Mary couldn't help but wonder if she and Freddie would ever have the conversation of what their relationship was or where it was headed.

That weekend, Veronica did the unthinkable. She laughed. She laughed during the prayer at church that the priest was delivering. She had been absolutely mortified and it was all John's fault. There they were, kneeling for prayer and John leaned over only to tell Veronica that the man in the pew in front of him had lost his toupee into the floor when he went to knee. So now, here they were at after mass brunch and John making fun of the fact that she had audibly lauged during the closing prayer over his eggs.

"Is it bad of me that I look forward to brunch after mass more than I do mass?" John asked of her.

"No! It's bad that you notice toupees on the pew in front of you and bring it to my attention at inopportune times!" She insisted, cutting into her bangers. John laughed at her.

"I know, I gotta' work on that. So, what did you think of the show last night? I thought we were really on. I mean, we didn't miss a single cue and I don't know what was different. Maybe we're just gettin' that much tighter in rehearsal." Veronica looked up from her plate as she stirred her tea.

"I'll tell ya' what I think. I think Roger's in love with 'er." Veronica said. John looked rather surprised at what he was hearing.

"What?" he questioned.

"That's why you were on. Roger was on. When Roger's on the rest of ya' are on." Veronica said, having gotten her tea to her liking. "John, he's in love it's so obvious." John laughed again.

"Oh my god! He is not. He's getting laid all the time. It's got nothing to do with us being on! I mean, he likes 'er I'm sure but he's not in love." John laughed again.

"Has he told you he doesn't love 'er." Veronica asked, causing John to think about it.

"No. He talks about 'er a lot and since we all came back he's...well, he's with her a lot." John said.

"...and he loves her. " Veronica added. John smiled at Veronica and shook his head.

"I know Roger better than you. He's never even halfway loved any girl he's dated." He said. She had to admit to herself that John was at least a little bit right. But the truth was that the show on Saturday night was exceptionally precise. So much so in fact, that as Veronica watched John over brunch she couldn't hide the delight in the way John's face lit up in talking about it. 


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