AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE TO ALL YOU FUCKING FREAKS

Long time no see, we know. Still, we had to print this newsletter up due to the sheer amount of announcements that we have to make.

First, we want to personally thank you for all of the birthday well-wishes given to Mr. Manson. The gift that he recieved backstage from a certain Amber was certainly memorable. (Let's hope that your parents never come across this newsletter, — right, Amber?)

Second, — well, we guess it's time to address the big fucking elephant in the room.

As some of you may have noticed, Gidget Gein has not joined us onstage at any shows since shortly before New Year's Eve.

This was no fluke. Due to a series of unfortunate circumstances, Gidget will no longer be joining us as the official Spooky Kids bassist.

You're all just bawling your goddamn eyes out, we know. Have no fear, however, — perhaps our third announcement will be a way to lessen the blow.

Last, but certainly not least, a new member has joined our Family, and she, — yes, SHE, — is absolutely THRILLED to introduce herself.

Meet our new bassist, BETTIE WUORNOS. This pretty young thing is the whole package, a degenerate's wet dream!

She's sexy!

She's trashy!

She'll pop a cap in your ass and fuck your girlfriend while you bleed out!

Not only is she the least physically grotesque out of all of us, (we can't promise you that she's so pretty on the inside,) but she can, in fact, play the bass in a better-than-average fashion.

Miss Wuornos is a longtime friend, — someone we've held near and dear to our hearts (and other assorted body parts) for years now.

It's time that you got to know her, too.

Why don't you read a few fun facts about our newest acolyte from the lady herself?
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Introducing...

BETTIE WUORNOS (BASSIST)

Fave Lunchboxes: Lisa Frank, Strawberry Shortcake, Rainbow Brite.

Fave Toys: Every single man in South Florida, as well as their heads, hearts, and genitals.

Fave Bands: Guns 'N Roses, Mötley Crüe, White Zombie, Lords of Acid, Fleetwood Mac.

Fave Movies: All the hardcore flicks she caught in the SECRET PORN THEATER in the back of the RECORD STORE IN THE MALL! (shhhh... don't tell anyone!!!!)

Fave Book: Valley of The Dolls - Jacqueline Susann

Heroes: Bettie Page, Aileen (Florida's best!), Joan Jett, Cherie Currie, and all the witches that were burned a few centuries ago.
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Like her? Love her? Dying to see what she has going on under that stupid GNR shirt????

Give Bettie a call at:

555-2772 (NOTE: She only talks dirty between the hours of 12:00 and 3:00 AM, — she is a busy woman, after all.)