I run my hands through my hair as I pace the waiting room.  We arrived at the hospital barely five minutes ago and they immediately took Alec back into a room, not allowing me to come along.

"Mia!"

I turn at the sound of my name and see Josh rushing through the door. He places his hands on my shoulders, a worried look covering his face. "Are you okay?"

I shrug off his hands and nod at him. "I'm fine. It's Alec. We went out for lunch at a sushi place and on our last roll they made it wrong because Alec went into anaphylactic shock." I close my eyes and try to calm my rapid breathing.

Josh immediately wraps his arms around me and pulls me close to him. He whispers words of consolation in my ears and I calm down slightly.

"Where's Alec?"

I turn again to see Alec's parents standing nervously at the front desk. I run over to them and place my hand on Mrs. Salmon's arm.

Her head snaps over to me and I notice tears in her eyes, but I don't look directly into them. I know that if I have a vision now I won't be able to hold it back. "Mia! What happened?!"

I remove my hand and explain the story again.

Mrs. Salmon wraps her arms tightly around me as she cries into my shoulder. I look behind her as I return her gesture - minus the tears - to see Mr. Salmon working with the receptionist, trying to figure out where Alec is. A room number is finally given and both of the Salmon parents rush up to his room.

I stay rooted in my spot, wanting more than anything to go see Alec but it's family only.

Josh walks back up to me and guides me to the hard chairs. "All we can do is wait, okay? But he'll be fine. I promise."

In a moment of weakness, I look up at Josh and accidentally look into his eyes. The hospital fades away as I faint and once again see the scene of Josh's death.

When I come to, Elizabeth is sitting in the chair next to Josh as I rest on his shoulder. Noticing that I'm awake, Josh presses a soft kiss on my forehead and rubs my arm. "You okay?"

I nod slowly. "Any news on Alec?"

"Besides the fact that he's in the hospital because of you? No."

I can't help but be startled at Elizabeth's harsh tone and accusing words. "It's not my fault," I defend, getting angry at her for being angry at me.

"You took him to a sushi place! It's like you were asking someone to feed him salmon!"

I gasp at her, unable to find a response to her claims.

Josh immediately steps in for me, thankfully. "You can't blame Mia for an error on the kitchen, Elizabeth."

"That stuff can happen! Mia shouldn't have taken him there!"

I stay silent, listening to her words and I can't help but believe them. If I hadn't taken Alec to get sushi then we wouldn't be here right now. It's because of me that Alec almost died.

I sink into the chair, feeling the guilt build up inside me. It's my fault.

Josh snaps his head over to me. "No. It's not Mia."

I slowly look up at his chin before I look away just as slowly. "I took him to the sushi place."

"Mia, accidents happen. This is in no way your fault."

I don't respond to him, simply folding my arms across my chest.

Josh sighs before standing up, causing me to look at him in surprise. He looks between Elizabeth and me, his gaze hard and critical. "Fine. Whatever." Without another word or glance, Josh walks out of the building.

I stare at the main doors for a few minutes, wondering what just happened. After a while I return to my slumped posture in the chair. No matter what Josh thinks, it's my fault. Besides, it won't take him too long to see the truth of what I've done.

***

After another hour in the waiting room, Mr. Salmon appears in front of Elizabeth and me - who is still angry at me for good reason. I look up at him, hopeful that he'll bring good news.

"Alec's awake. He's been moved to a different room so friends can visit now, too." His gaze settles on me, causing me to stand up nervously and Elizabeth follows. "He's asking for you guys."

If anyone was listening in to our oh-so pleasant conversation, they would think that Alec wanted to see both of us, but by the way his eyes are staring into my soul - or so it felt - I know Alec was asking for me specifically. Trying not to hesitate, I nod. Sending one last look at me, Mr. Salmon directs us up to Alec's room on the second floor. He gestures for us to head in before him. I take a deep breath before entering.

My eyes immediately look onto Alec's and guilt fills me again. His eyes narrow as I approach him slowly.

He probably hates me now...

Surprisingly, as I approach his side, he grins and grasps my hand tightly. "I guess that sushi place is no longer a place to go huh?"

I blink at him, taken back by his friendly smile and words. "What?"

He chuckles, letting go of my hand without explaining anything further.

"Hi, Liz."

Elizabeth glares at him but it soon fades into worry. "Are you okay, Alec?"

He waves her off, scoffing. "I'm fine. It takes more than that to kill me."

His words were sarcastic, but they pierced my heart and I was suddenly unable to breath. When Alec looks back over at me, his eyebrows furrow in concern. "Are you okay, Mia?"

Tears brim my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. "Yeah, don't worry about me. I'm fine."

Alec rolls his eyes, obviously seeing straight through my lie. "This isn't your fault, you know."

Elizabeth scoffs.

Alec's head immediately snaps over to Elizabeth and he almost growls. "It is not Mia's fault. Accidents happen."

Both Elizabeth's and my eyes widen at Alec's harsh tone and I can see her resolve fading. Elizabeth glances over at me and sighs dejectedly. "I'm sorry, Mia. I was just confused at how this happened and I took it out on you."

I shake my head. "No you were right to blame me."

And without another word, I leave the room and head out to my car. How could I have been so careless as to take Alec to a sushi house? He even warned me before anything started and I ignored him.

***

"Mia! Dinner is ready!"

I groan before flipping myself off the bed where I had been laying ever since I got home from the hospital three hours ago. Both Dad and Lauren have tried to come in and talk to me, but since I never responded to their pleadings, they left me alone. But now I have to go face their worried faces and hear them try to comfort me. Joy.

As I walk into the dining room, both heads turn to look at me. I can't help the small eye roll that happens.

Dinner is filled with words between the adults and more worried glances towards me. When I finish eating, I take my plate to the kitchen. As I turn to exit, ready to head off to bed, I'm blocked by a figure standing in front of me.

Without a word, Lauren grabs my hand gently and guides me into the living room. She releases my hand and sits on the couch, gesturing for me to sit as well. I do, cautiously, knowing that she probably wants to talk about my feelings.

"What's bugging you, Mia?"

I glance towards the dinning room.

Lauren smiles and shakes her head. "I sent your dad to his room. He won't be able to hear us."

I relax a little.

"Is it boyfriend problems?"

I only stare at her.

Lauren sighs, "I can't help you if you don't let me know what's going on."

She makes a fair point. Maybe advice is what I need right now. "It's a mix of friends and boyfriend."

"Then let's start with your friends first, shall we?"

I nod, wringing my fingers together. I explain to her what happened with Alec and how it's my fault that he had an allergic reaction. When I finish, I look up from my hands to see Lauren smiling at me again.

"Why would you blame yourself for that? It's the restaurant's fault, which should probably be dealt with."

I ignore the last part of her sentence, knowing that the Salmons are ones to blame companies like that. "Because I took him there! I suggested sushi and even though Alec brought up his allergy, I went ahead with it anyway." I tired of explaining my guilt.

"Take a step back, Mia. Look at this through someone else's shoes, Alec's, perhaps? Did he say he blamed you for what happened today?"

I place my hands under my thighs and swing my feet against the carpet, looking down again. "No," I mutter quietly.

"Then why are you blaming yourself? I know that it's natural to feel bad when something like this happens to a friend, but don't put yourself through this unnecessary pain."

My feet still with her advice. Unnecessary?

"Think about it, Mia," Lauren continues when I don't speak. "You're freaking out about something that isn't as big of a deal as you think it is."

"Not a big deal? Alec is in the hospital and Josh hates me!"

"And how does Joshua play into all this?"

I smile a little when I hear her say Josh's real name, one that I'm not used to, but the smile drops when I remember our fight. "Josh met me at the hospital and got mad at me when I blamed myself. So he left and hasn't contacted me since."

I never thought I would be the kind of person to have a caring boyfriend, someone who keeps in contact throughout the day. Josh is that kind of person, and not hearing from him for about five hours now is weird.

"I know a thing or two about teenage boys and how they think. I know that Josh cares for you, that's evident from the way you two interact. So hear me out. From what you told me, it sounds like Josh got mad only because he cares about you."

"Wh-"

"Let me finish." I nod. "He's probably mad because you won't see the truth and it's hurting you, which, in turn, is hurting him. Josh wants you to be happy and seeing you blame yourself for an accident probably hurt."

"You didn't see him, Lauren."

"No, I didn't see him and I wasn't there to hear everything, but I do have a son your age and I know him pretty well."

My ears perk up at her words. "You have a son?"

Lauren furrows her eyebrows at me. "You knew that."

I shake my head. "Why haven't I met him?"

"He lives with his father an hour away from here. He is coming up tomorrow, to meet you guys and everything, so you'll meet him then. Anyway, back on topic. My son has had a girlfriend and whenever he had questions or they fought, he came to me. He explained his thoughts so I understand where Josh is coming from."

We fall into silence as I think over the fight. The silly, stupid, fight that I caused by being dumb. "How do I apologize?"

"Call him."