"What the hell are you doing over here? What's going on inside?" Levi rushed at me the moment I landed, barely giving me a moment to open my mouth. I wanted to ask the same thing. I had seen a barrage of rocks flying through the air, and the carnage on the edge of the outskirts of the houses.

"B..Bertholdt transformed..." I murmured, glancing between him and the commander, adjusting the strap on my shoulder to give it some temporary relief. "Hange's squad was caught under the blast...Including me, there are only seven of us left..."

There's no way they can spare reinforcements...

"Levi...are you the only one who made it out of the front lines..?" His expression said it all, and I inhaled slowly.
"They have us cornered. The Beast is keeping us pinned, and if the Colossal makes it to the wall, we've lost." Erwin explained, tugging his cape so it further covered his amputation. "(Y/N), was Reiner taken down?"

Shaking my head, I couldn't keep my feet still. Shifting my weight from one leg to the other, I likely looked like I was on the verge of a meltdown. I was.
"Not completely. The thunder spears b..blew his head off, but he survived...and he shielded himself when Bertholdt transformed. He...he shielded me, too..."

Both of their eyes widened for a moment, but Erwin's quickly softened.
"I see. Pity I won't have the chance to thank him for that..." I was confused by his wording, but he didn't let me dwell on it for long. "Do you need any gas? Blades?"

He moved to begin tinkering with his own gear, and I held my hands up almost frantically.
"N..no! No, Winnie, I'm good! Save them!" I insisted. I wasn't really going too well in the gas department, but I'd manage.

Sighing, Erwin was about to say something when a mighty crash shattered the air, and we whipped around to look upwards. On the wall, on his back and unmoving, was Eren. He looked like he was out cold.

Please, Armin...have a plan...

Before anything could be said, a ruckus began amongst the new recruits off to the side, and I turned to find that shitty ginger on the ground, Marlo laying into him with words.
"It's our job to guard the horses! Why'd you let yours run away?!"

I approached, watching as Floch yanked his arm away, refusing to rise to his feet.
"Shut up! Like it even matters now!" He kicked his legs like a toddler, his eyes squeezed shut. "All of those other scouts were insanely strong, and all of them died in an instant! What chance do we have where they failed?! There's no point in guarding the horses...cuz there's not gonna be anyone left to ride them home!"

Floch's outburst cast a heavy silence among the recruits, and I could see in their faces that they were all thinking the same thing. Gritting my teeth, I moved closer, limping slightly.
"You joined the scout regiment to be a hero, right?" Everyone turned to me as I joined them, but I only focused on the man on the ground who clawed at his hair. "You think all those men and women out there died for nothing? That you're no different?"

I get it.

I held my hand out to him, expression softer than it should have been.
"Nobody wants to die, you idiot...but when you say that, it pisses me off. You say that everyone whose died up until this point contributed nothing? If we can make it through today...even just one of us...it could be the tipping point. Humanity could be saved. Are you saying your family back home isn't worth laying your life down for?"

Am I just telling him to die..? These bastards don't stand a chance...

When he didn't accept my hand, I glanced to Marlo.
"What about Hitch? Don't you want her to have a better future?" The poor bowlcut seemed confused, not quite understanding. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I muttered curses under my breath, swinging my arm to point towards the wall. "Look, we're fighting with everything we have in there! I know you're scared! I am too, but if you don't wanna die, then you gotta fight! Don't just lay down and wait to be crushed or eaten!"

Nobody said a word for or against me. I wasn't sure if I was helping them, but I had to try.
"C..Captain (Y/N)...How many survivors are left over there..?" Marlo piped up, searching my eyes for answers. If I gave them the correct number, they'd fall into further panic.
"Enough." I replied sternly, glancing over my shoulder to find Levi kneeling begore Erwin.

What are they doing..?

Shaking myself out of it, I saluted the recruits, keeping my back straight and chin up.
"Stand tall, quit whining and wait for your orders! Keep the horses safe, and get through this!" They chorused their weak agreements, and I turned to quickly make my way back over to the two men, Levi hurrying to stand.

He seemed off. He appeared a lot more serious, which was really saying something.
"(Y/N), I need you to return to your post. I have a plan to deal with the Beast Titan, and I need you to assist in taking down both Bertholdt and Reiner." Swallowing, I looked to the ground, flinching as another barrage of rocks flew overhead.

"Can't I stay here..? I'd be better suited..." I murmured, knowing that if I returned to my original post, I'd have to do what I had been dreading since the expedition was first announced. A soft smile graced Erwin's lips as he shook his head, placing his hand on top of my matted (H/C) hair.

"That's an order. I'm sorry, but I need you to do this for me. Will you?" I felt so uneasy. Turning to Levi for an answer, he nudged me in the side, motioning his chin to the wall.
"You heard him. Now's not the time to be stubborn. Trust us."

Trust us...Trust us...Trust...

That word alone was such a bad omen. The Beast titan was unlike any other titan we had faced. It was strong, it was smart, and with each flick of it's wrist, it was sewing seeds of destruction. Death rained from above, and every bone in my fragile little body screamed at me to stay put.

"Y..yes, Sirs..." Squeezing my eyes shut, I spun around and threw myself into Levi's arms, hands locking against his back. "I got a stain on the shirt you gave to me! S..so you gotta kick my ass for that when this is all over, o..okay, Levi?! Promise me! You're gonna kick my ass!"

He hesitated for far too long, but he eventually held me back, arms loose but his hands frightfully tight as they grasped my cape.
"I promise..." He murmured, lingering before forcing me to step back, eyes averted to the ground.

Immediately, I spun and launched myself into Erwin's chest, hiding my face away, nails catching on loose threads.
"I..I'll fight hard for you! They don't stand a chance! I'll make you proud of me, I swear! I'll finish Reiner..! When we get home, you can retire! R..right?!"

I was engulfed by the warmth of his arm and cape, joined to him in an embrace that far surpassed any we had ever shared. He was calm, I could tell that by the beat of his heart compared to mine, which was stampeding.
"Yes, I think my role as commander shall end with this battle..." He whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. "I've always been proud of you, don't forget that..."

Don't make me go...

"Keep pushing forward. Take Reiner and Bertholdt down, and when this is all over, we can go home. Alright?" When I squeezed him, he held me back twice as hard, and I nodded against his chest, uncaring that the buckle of his chest strap grazed against my forehead.
"Alright..." Tearing myself away, I gave him my strongest salute, nails digging into my palm as my fist pressed over my heart. "Da...Commander Erwin, Sir! I won't let you down!"

I caught his crystaline eyes following me as I dashed away, preparing to launch myself back over the wall. I still didn't feel right, but Erwin had a sense about these things. I trusted his judgement. On any other day, I would have refused to obey his command, but today was different. For once, I had faith. After so long, I was willing to trust someone.

Reiner...I'm coming for you...

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***Erwin POV***

I could feel Levi's eyes burning into the back of my skull as I stared after (Y/N), slowly turning to give him my attention.
"Yes, Levi? I assume you have something to say?"

His expression took me off guard. In the past, I had had that vicious fury directed at me, but this was different. It weighed so much more than it had back then.
"You lied to her." He growled, fists tight against his sides as he stood there, glaring up at me.

"You lied too. You can't be certain this plan will succeed, yet you also made a promise to her." I pointed out, softening once the realisation hit him. "If I had told her the truth, she wouldn't have left, and she would have followed me to the gates of hell. Would you prefer that?"

"No!" After snapping, Levi quickly recomposed himself, taking a deep breath. "No...She just...(Y/N) isn't going to cope with this..." I placed my hand on his shoulder as I started to move past him, towards the frantic recruits. The lives I would sacrifice.
"Then you need to make sure you take that Beast down so you can be there for her."

The ravonet didn't follow me immediately, and I took a deep, calming breath as I started towards the beginning of the end.

Pity...I was rather looking forward to her calling me dad...

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***No. Wait. Come back.

I'm like half blind atm because my eye is all messed up so sorry if there's more typos than usual.

Also my phone doesn't seem to like AoT names.

pseudo_eternity Thank you for being patient with me 🥺👉👈

Next Time: Do or Die***