Hnng we all love a freckle-y boy

Warnings: Verge is self conscious, a bit of anxiety, but like, all fluff

--

Virgil stared at his reflection in the mirror that he was stood in front of. His own pair of brown eyes stared back, judging him for caring so much about such small things. He noted that his hair was a mess, as it usually was after having woken up. His bed hair was horrendous, yet it was not what he disliked the most about his appearance.

No, his face was covered in horrid dots that made him look ...different.

He happened to be plagued by freckles that scattered over his face, and even down on his shoulders and arms as if having them all over his face wasn't bad enough. None of the other sides had freckles, and neither did Thomas, so Virgil found this whole thing extremely unfair.

He disapproved greatly of them. There was a reason why he always wore long sleeves and makeup.

In the beginning he hadn't been this self conscious about them, but he always covered them up anyway since as Anxiety he had always needed to look frightening to get them to listen to him. No one could look particularly scary while covered in freckles, so, he had hid them.

Virgil no longer had to inflict fear to be listened to, but yet after all the time hiding how he really looked he got increasingly anxious about showing the others what he actually looked like. He was accepted by them now, more than accepted. He was part of, what Patton called it, the famILY.

He had even managed to (not without hyperventilating) confess his romantic feelings to Logan and the nerd had reciprocated them, and ever since then the two of them had been dating. He had been so happy during the weeks they had been together, Logan caused him infinite joy.

Though since he needed to constantly hide his awful freckles the two of them had not shared a bed even once, Virgil did not want to have to sleep in his makeup. Luckily Logan didn't seem to care about sharing a bed and he'd never have to come up with an excuse as to why Logan couldn't stay in his room over the night.

He could not fully get used to the fact that he had someone who actually held romantic feelings for him. It was wonderful, and a bit scary, but he never wanted it to end. And he did not want to ever give Logan a reason to want it to end. The other sides were all used to how he looked, which made Virgil feel that he couldn't just come downstairs one morning without any makeup on. It was simply something he could not do without causing himself to feel an excessive amount of anxiety just thinking of it.

It might seem trivial, a tiny insignificant problem that should not be this much of a bother. Virgil knew that, the rational part of his mind had pointed that out several times, that they wouldn't hate him just because he'd hidden his freckles from them. But the anxiety driven part of him had whispered quietly that ‘wasn't hiding how he looked just like lying’? And ‘will they be happy knowing that he had concealed who he was’?

Virgil also had a recurring thought that asked him exactly what their reaction would be if they saw him with no makeup and all of his freckles on display. Would they even care? Would they notice immediately or would it go unnoticed at first? Would they dislike them as much as Virgil did? What if they ridiculed him for being the only one with freckles?

It was stupid, so very stupid. But he couldn't shake the thoughts nor his stupid, so very stupid worrying. All of these thoughts and the anxiety over the possibility of him being seen by the others without his makeup had caused him to slowly become more and more self conscious about the oodles of dots that were scattered over his skin.

The freckles game him another reason to feel like he was different from the others. Gave him yet another reason to feel like there was something wrong with him. Sure, they all had slight differences in their appearance, like the fact that Roman's hair was a bit more wavy, Logan was the tallest of them, Patton was the shortest, etc. But this was still not something that Virgil had ever been happy about, and his dislike towards his freckles only grew.

Virgil got woken up from his thoughts by the sound of his door opening, and he became aware of the fact that he was still stood in front of the mirror, staring at himself. Then he realized that hearing his door open meant someone was walking into his room, and his own face that was still staring back at him, with no makeup on it, was not fit for being seen by whoever was stepping inside.

Virgil reacted instinctively, he ducked his head and threw his arms over his face, desperately hoping that the person could not get a good look on his face.

"Get out!" He yelled, only panicking slightly. He heard the door close, and he peeked out through the gap between his arms to conclude that he was once again the only person in his room.

"Virgil, are you alright?" Came Logan's voice through the door, and there was a clear tone of worry. Virgil instantly felt bad for making Logan worried, and also embarrassed over yelling at him.

"I'm fine, sorry, give me a few minutes." Virgil said, scrambling to find all that he needed to make it look like there wasn't a single freckle to be found on him. Luckily the hundreds of freckles covering his shoulders and creeping down over his chest and his back were covered by his long sleeved shirt and his hoodie, he just had to conceal some by the neckline and all of the ones on his face.

A while later he was finished, and after nervously checking that none of the dots could be seen he called out, telling Logan that it was okay from his to come inside of his room now. Logan gladly did so, closing the door behind him and then walking right up to Virgil, probably to assure himself that Virgil was indeed fine.

"Sorry for… freaking out. I didn't mean to yell. You surprised me and I wasn't ready." He said sheepishly, glad that his makeup covered not only his freckles but his blush too.

"It is alright, Virgil. I should've knocked first to not intrude on your privacy. You had your door closed for a reason after all." Logan said calmly and reassuringly, and Virgil could not find the slightest clue pointing towards any lie.

Virgil stood on his tiptoes to kiss Logan on his lips. It might have been a quick peck, but for Virgil it was always a win when he let himself show affection without being too anxious about it. Logan's lips curled into a small smile which as always made it slightly harder for Virgil to stop staring at his boyfriend's pretty face.

"Did you come here to tell me anything?" Virgil then wondered, because if his intent were of any other sort then it was likely that he would have mentioned it, except if he'd been sent to tell him something and then forgot about it. Logan usually informed him of why he was there the first thing he did when he came to Virgil's room (it was something Logan had always done, because in the past Virgil had always assumed something bad had happened each time someone came to him, and it reduced his anxiety if he was immediately told that there wasn't anything to worry about).

"Right! Patton wanted me to inform you that lunch is ready, and I wanted to make sure that you were actually awake, after all it is beneficial for you to be awake before 12pm." Logan said. Virgil was sure that Logan would want him to wake up much earlier, but since they got together Virgil had actually attempted to wake up earlier, because it was quite nice to be able to eat breakfast together.

Though, Virgil had ended up staying up until 5am this morning, and then slept until 10am, so he'd not woken up very early, and then he'd also been lying in bed while checking tumblr for almost two whole hours. But he'd still only gotten 5 hours of sleep, and he felt slightly drowsy and drained still.

But, food seemed like a lovely thing, and Virgil willingly followed Logan out of his room to the kitchen to eat what Roman and Patton had cooked. After lunch they were going to be filming a video until dinner time, that much Virgil knew from the schedule Logan had given them all the previous evening, and then after that he was sure either Roman or Patton would insist that they would watch a movie or play a board game, so at least Virgil knew exactly what he would need to face today.

--

He wasn't sure why they had both ended up in his room, after all it was fairly late, maybe even 11pm, and Virgil was beginning to feel really tired from not having gotten a proper amount of sleep. But here they were, sitting on his bed and watching Doctor Who on the tv. Roman and Patton had gone to bed, so they could've used the tv in the living room of the mindscape, but they had somehow agreed that this was better so here they were.

The screen zoomed in, showing the words 'to be continued' and then the end credits began to roll. Logan turned his face to Virgil. "Do you want to watch another episode?"

"It ended on a cliffhanger, not a chance we'll stop watching now. I'm just going to take a quick shower first." Virgil said as an answer, and Logan let out a small chuckle.

"You can start watching it without me." Virgil said, because he felt bad leaving Logan alone, he didn't want him to be bored waiting for him and after all this was maybe their third time watching through the new seasons of Doctor Who so it was not as if Virgil didn’t know what would happen in the episode. But Logan shook his head.

"I'm waiting for you, go shower." He said, leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to Virgil's lips. The kiss certainly didn't make it easier for him to leave, even if it was only for as most ten minutes he’d be gone. Virgil was slightly tempted to postpone showering until tomorrow in favour of them making out for a while between the two episodes instead.

Reluctantly Virgil got off of his bed, picking up his pajamas (a long sleeved, baggy shirt and a pair of purple pajama bottoms) and a new pair of underwear on his way over to the bathroom so that he had something to change into after his shower. He closed the door to the bathroom, not bothering to lock it, knowing that Logan wasn't going to open it anyway while he was in there.

He turned the shower on and then quickly got undressed as the water hopefully turned warm. He carefully reached his foot out to test the temperature before stepping into the shower. The hot water washed over his body, and as always there was a fleeting thought wondering if he could stay in the shower forever. Then he realized that no matter how nice it was to stand in hot water he found it even nicer to spend time with Logan, so staying there for too long was not an option.

Quickly he shampooed his hair and used a soap (that smelled of lavender because shut up, Virgil found it nice, and it was somehow calming) to clean himself. Then when he got out of the shower he dried himself off, changed into his pajamas, and then used his hair dryer on his hair, because he didn't want to have wet hair for the next fifteen minutes.

Virgil suffocated a yawn as he stepped out of the bathroom, finding Logan still sat on his bed, reading a book. He recognized the book easily, it is one of his favorites and he had read it more times over the years than he could count on his fingers.Virgil trudged right up to his bed, seating himself right next to Logan again and throwing his arms around him.

He let out a content sigh, Logan was warm, and after his hot shower he realized that his room were colder than what he usually preferred. So naturally he just stole warmth from Logan.

Logan didn't look up from the page, but he did turn his head to press a chaste kiss to Virgil's temple when he leaned his head against Logan's shoulder. Logan then closed the book, putting it down on the nightstand where it had been lying before he picked it up. He then shifted until they were face to face and Virgil leaned in slightly, wanting Logan to kiss him again.

Logan understood exactly what he wanted, and he closed the remainder of the gap between them, kissing him just as softly as he had before. Then, a little too soon for Virgil's liking, Logan pulled back, the shadow of a smile showing on his lips.

He was happy just sitting here with Logan, but then he realized that Logan was looking at him with a new kind of interest, as if he had not seen him this close up before (which he surely had many, many times) and Virgil wondered what it was he found so fascinating.

"What are you looking at?" He asked, small smile playing at his lips as he gave Logan a questioning glance. Logan cupped Virgil's face in his hands, thumbs brushing over his cheeks. The look Logan was giving him was rather more interested and showed more wonder than it usually did, and he wasn't looking Virgil in the eyes, he was staring at...

Realization hit Virgil like a brick thrown to the face, he felt as if someone had poured a bucket of ice cold water over him. He pushed himself away from Logan, which resulted in him falling off of the bed. He didn't care much about the pain in his right shoulder from the impact to the floor, instead Virgil curled up in a ball, arms thrown tightly over his face as if it was not already too late for him to hide his face.

Of course his makeup got washed away in the shower, and now Logan had seen every freckle on his face, every single one. He knows now and there is no going back. Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid-

A hand was placed very gently on his shoulder, Virgil's best guess was what Logan was now kneeling in front of him. "Virgil?"

"No." He said, as if that magically meant that he wasn't actually there, and he wouldn't have to deal with the situation that he now found himself in.

"I suppose you were not intending on letting me see you like this?" Logan asked, not really needing Virgil to say anything for him to know the answer to the question, so Virgil said nothing, and neither did he lower his arms.

"Virgil, love, let me see you." Logan requested with a very soft tone of voice which almost made Virgil look up, because it was incredibly rare that Logan spoke with such obvious care in his words. But Virgil couldn't bring himself to do what Logan had asked, and he ended up weakly shaking his head.

Virgil heard a little bit of shuffling, and he supposed Logan was sitting down on the floor I front of him, he probably got tired of kneeling. Virgil felt Logan's hand card through his hair, playing with it, something that was more calming than Virgil was going to admit.

"Remember to breathe." Logan reminded and Virgil realized that his breathing was a little too quick. They sat there for a few minutes, until Virgil slowly lowered his arms, even if he was still sitting with his head ducked. Logan cupped his face in his hands, and Virgil let him tilt his head up, actually meeting Logan's gaze.

"Why do you feel the need to hide your freckles?" Logan asked, eyes examining every inch of Virgil's face, and he felt too self conscious about it, he couldn't help but to avert his eyes, he couldn't look at Logan.

"Because I'm- I'm the only one with these tiny ...imperfections." Virgil's voice lowered with every word he uttered, and he felt his anxiety continuing to rise and make it harder to take full breaths. Virgil ran the breathing exercises in his mind, tapping every second that passed with his finger to keep count easier as he waited for Logan's response.

"I hate to disagree with you," Logan stated (which Virgil knew that was not true, Logan loved debating about the things they disagreed on), "but I have to confess that I think the freckles makes you look utterly stunning."

Virgil said nothing, he didn't know what to say. Instead he just stared at Logan in disbelief. He couldn't understand how Logan could possibly find the freckles attractive.

"You look gorgeous, and the freckles causes you to look most endearing." Logan continued on, as if he didn't notice the highly sceptic look Virgil was giving him.

"You… don't think they make me look bad?" He asked quietly, his voice barely above a mumble and he wasn't sure if Logan could actually hear what he was saying or not.

"Not at all."

"Are you sure?" Virgil said, and he saw how the corner of Logan's mouth twitched into one of his almost-smiles.

"Virgil, if anything the freckles make you look even more handsome." Logan stated, and Virgil snorted at that because he could never really see himself as handsome, and he didn't know how Logan could look at him and see him in a different way than he did.

"And you don't ...hate me for hiding this from you?" He asked carefully, even if he knew the answer to that question he still had to ask

"No, that would be silly. I will always love you. And I'd also like to say that it is not for anyone but yourself to decide which parts of yourself you choose to show us."

Virgil blinked several times, trying to get rid of the wet that had started to gather in his eyes during the last few minutes. Logan let his hands drop, then he stood up, helping Virgil into a standing position too. Logan kissed Virgil's forehead. It was something he did often, and Virgil found it to be a quite comforting gesture, even if it always showed of the difference in their heights.

"Don't- don't tell the others, okay?" Virgil told him, not caring that he sounded like he was begging.

"Of course not. It is entirely up to you to decide when you are ready for the others to know, and I am not going to rush you. I wouldn't wish for you to do something you are not comfortable with." He said, his hand reaching out to pull Virgil into a hug. Virgil relaxed into Logan's hold, looping his arms around his waist and leaning his head against Logan's shoulder.

"Thank you." Virgil murmured, grateful that Logan was so much more understanding than he'd feared he would be. He stepped out of the embrace, finally managing to showing Logan a genuine smile, even if it was small. Logan sat down on the bed, patting the mattress next to him and Virgil crawled into bed again, lying down and rolling over onto his back.

"We'll watch the next episode, and then I'll leave so that you'll get some sleep." Logan said, and Virgil realized that Logan didn't have to leave. Since he had found out about the freckles he wouldn't have to sleep in his makeup.

"Stay." Virgil said, and when Logan raised a brow and looked surprised he scoffed. "Well, you've seen my freckles, I haven't got anything to hide from you now."

Logan laughed, relaxing back down onto the mattress. "Well, I'd love to stay then."

He rolled over to face Virgil, who was still lying flat on his back and staring up at the ceiling but seeing the movement in the corner of his eye.

He felt Logan's hand on his chest, fingers tracing slow figures, and he let his eyes close as he was quite content lying there, and also quite tired from not having slept enough the previous night. Though only a moment later Logan's voice disturbed the silence around them and Virgil reopened his eyes.

"You've got freckles down your chest too?" Logan asked, his thumb tracing Virgil's collarbone. It tickled slightly and Virgil scrunched his nose.

"And my back, my shoulders, and all over my arms. The small pests are everywhere." He grumbled and pulled at the neckline to show parts of his shoulder, pouting when he saw Logan smiling as if that was a good thing. Logan's hand found his, grasping it and holding it up so that he could use his other hand to pull Virgil's sleeve down, revealing loads more freckles that no one except Virgil himself had ever seen before.

"You are correct, they are everywhere, how marvelous." Logan said, kissing the skin where the sleeve had been pushed up. Virgil just kind of stared at him, because he rarely knew how to react when Logan was affectionate.

"Now, before it gets far too late, are we going to watch the next episode before bed?" Logan asked, picking up the remote control from the nightstand, and his index finger hovered above the play button. Virgil nodded, pushing himself up slightly and putting two pillows behind his back so that he was in between a sitting and lying down position and could see the screen easily.

Logan started the episode and then did the same, sitting close enough to have an arm around Virgil's shoulders and allow him to lean his head against him. Virgil found it very comfortable and as always he treasured every moment of physical contact. He yawned, his sudden feeling of exhaust reminding him of the fact that he had not gotten much sleep last night.

Virgil might have accidentally fallen asleep before they had even watched half of the episode.

--

Written: 28th, 29th December 2018
Published: 18th February 2019
Words: 3872

Y'all imagine Virgil with freckles tho, I've never seen anything cuter

I literally forgot this fic existed lol oops, it was meant to be published a while ago

Also,,,, I cant do school, someone help me. I'm so tired and I can't function and I can't do all these assignments, literally all I do is write fanfiction, it's all I can do apparently :/

Sorry for forgetting to publish like,,two days ago