My mom decided that I wasn't allowed to go back over to the boys' house that night, so I was stuck in my room as everyone but Shinsou left. I wasn't too upset over it, I'd just wait for her to fall asleep and then head over. 

But that also meant that I had to deal with Shinsou, one-on-one.

I was still over by the window, sat on the same box, Shinsou was on his bed, scrolling through his phone. I had lit up another cigarette after the others had gone, so I took a drag as I watched him. He was pretending not to care about the silence, but he only fidgeted that much when he was wildly uncomfortable. 

"You're having trouble sleeping?" I asked, not turning my head towards him. It was easier to talk to him when I couldn't see him lately. 

"When am I not?" was the sarcastic question I was rewarded with. 

I snuffed out my cigarette on the window sill, an adamant frown on my lips. "I'm sorry... about that night. I should have never let you do it," I confessed quietly. 

I heard him sigh, a soft thud on his bed which I assumed was his phone getting tossed. "Iz, come here." I reluctantly listened, allowing my feet to take me to the foot of his bed, where I halted. "I'm not gonna bite, ya know," he said with a small laugh. 

I rolled my eyes at him, sitting at the end of his bed with my arms crossed. "Okay, I'm here. Now what?" 

"Now," Shinsou said as he pushed himself to sit up. He turned his body so he was fully facing me, our knees lightly touching. "I tell you a little secret. You didn't let me do shit. Everything I did that night, I did because I wanted to. You couldn't have stopped me, so none of the guilt bullshit." 

"I could have stopped you if I actually tried," I grumbled, shifting a little in my spot. 

He rolled his eyes at me. "It's adorable that you think so." 

He knew exactly how to push my buttons. After being my best friend for years, he knew I hated being belittled and always rose to the challenge. In a moment of sassy weakness, I bit out, "So, you're saying that if I would have fallen to pieces, sobs and all, saying that I couldn't risk losing you, you still would have gone?" 

It made him pause, and just for a second, I thought I had won. "Did you send me in there because you could risk losing me?" 

"No!" I nearly shouted as soon as he asked. "No, not at all. You were just... you were the only one I trusted to make it back out." Was that a big confession? To me, that felt like a huge confession. 

He nodded once, accepting the answer. "And I did, so stop beating yourself up over it." 

We fell into silence, both of us absorbed in our own thoughts. My own were drifting through everything that had happened since I moved there. One memory stood out though. 

"Shinsou?" I asked, forcing him back to reality. "Why did you never tell me that you could play guitar?" 

A loud and sudden laugh escaped him at the question. "I can't believe that's what you're hung up on." 

"Well, I've been best friends with you for years and never had any idea, so yes, that is what I'm hung up on," I said back, once again too sassy for my own good. 

He took a breath, his laughter dying away. "My dad got me into music when I was a kid. As I got older, he started to tell me that I needed to use it as an outlet for everything, instead of drugs and shit. After he died, I kind of just abandoned it." 

"Oh," I mumbled. I hadn't expected an answer like that. I thought it was because he was embarrassed or something, not something so... deep. 

"Yeah," he breathed. "Now that I'm doing all the shit he told me not to, it feels wrong to play anything, like I'm disrespecting his memory or something." 

I nodded in understanding, turning to lean my back against the wall and face out towards our room. "We're too sober for this, aren't we?" 

Another laugh escaped him and it made me involuntarily relax. I wasn't used to seeing him so gloomy. The sarcasm and the spite I was familiar with, but not this bone-deep sadness he'd suddenly adopted. "There's a perfectly good window to smoke out of right there," he pointed out, his head nodding at my window. 

"Did you forget that Katsuki's window is three feet away from it?" 

"Why should I care?" 

"Because Ei and him still aren't team 'weed twenty-four-seven'." 

"It's late, Iz. It's a sleep aid." 

I groaned, pushing myself off the wall. "Fine." 

Shinso went to rummage through his backpack on the floor, while I headed to the shelf housing my empty candle jar. We met at the window to share our hauls. He already had a preroll ready to go, so we just ended up smoking that. 

We didn't end up returning to our previous topic, instead, Shinsou told me all the things that had changed back home. Our old math teacher was pregnant again, my favorite history teacher just quit, and the counselor everyone hated just became the principal. I was suddenly extremely happy I left when I did. 

A flash of red at the neighboring window caught my attention and made any other remarks die on my tongue. I was wide-eyed at being caught as Eijirou pushed Katsuki's window open. "Well, I guess Kats is just gonna be mad at both of us now." 

I glanced down at the hand he waved and found a cigarette box there. "You smoke?" I asked a little dumbfounded. Eijirou was always the one turning down nicotine, weed, alcohol, you name it. I'd very rarely seen him with any kind of substance. Cigarettes weren't crazy, but paired with Eijirou? That was wild to me. 

"Not anymore," he said with a wink and his signature toothy grin. All this while pulling a cigarette from the box and lighting up. 

I threw a glance at Shinsou, who just raised his brows in question toward me. "You're not mad?" I turned back to my boyfriend. "I thought you'd be mad." 

"Darlin'," the redhead said with a small sigh. He rested his chin in his hand, his gaze full of longing as he watched me. "I don't think I have the right to be mad about anyone's vices right now." 

At this point, I liked to think I knew my boys pretty well. At least well enough to feel out Eijirou's double meaning. "Ei, my love, what did you break into this time? Better yet, when did you even have the time to do it? You and Kats barely leave my side." 

My keen perception earned a laugh from the redhead, one I was worried would wake up Katsuki. I hurriedly shushed him, but he waved me off. "Kats is passed out in my bed, it's fine." 

"Why is he over there?" 

"We were supposed to be doing homework, but he fell asleep. Didn't want to wake him," was the offhanded explanation I received. 

"He's not sleeping?" I countered, a brow raised. If it was bad enough that Eijirou knew, why didn't I? 

The redhead took a long drag of his cigarette and playfully blew the smoke in my direction. "We're used to sleeping with you, it's hard to change it." 

Shinsou scoffed, finally passing the joint back to me after babysitting it for the past five minutes like a little bitch. "All I ask is that you go over there. I'll cover for you if I have to, but I'm not sleeping in the same room as them." 

Eijirou laughed from across the open space. "Dude, you've slept in our house." 

"Not your room," Shinsou pointed out, already looking antsy for the joint to be back in his hands. God damn, I hadn't even hit it yet. 

I quickly took my hit and passed it back. No one liked dealing with an antsy Shinsou,  even me. "You're kind of demanding," I teased the purple-haired teen. 

Shinsou shrugged, a tired smirk on his lips as he took another hit. "Yeah, well, I killed someone for you. A no-boyfriend sleepover rule seems more than fair to me." 

I faked a gasp at his words. We were both pretty stoned at that point, so we'd finally entered the peak of our friendship. The time frame where we can actually joke around and be best friends without it being weird or awkward. "You're gonna milk this until the day I die, aren't you?" 

"Oh," he said with a knowing smile directed at me. "It'll be longer than that." 

"I'll be dead!" I cried in accusation. "How're you gonna hold it over my head if I'm already dead." 

"Toga's into all that dark witchy shit, she'll figure it out." 

"She's into shadow work! That's dealing with her own personal traumas, not necromancy." 

He leveled me with a look that asked if I was stupid. "You're telling me, that if you die tomorrow, Toga isn't going to find a way to communicate with you?" 

"Moving on," I said instead of admitting defeat. I turned back to Eijirou, who was watching the two of us with an amused smile. "What're you smiling about, shark boy?" 

The redhead snorted at the nickname. "Does that make you lava girl?" he asked with a smirk. 

I wore my best arrogant smile. "No, that's Katsuki." 

I thought Eijirou was about to fall out of the window he was laughing so hard. I even managed to get Shinsou to laugh as well. Damn, I didn't think it was that funny, but okay. I frowned as I mumbled to myself, "Who am I then?" 

"The main character," Shinsou said in a 'duh' tone. "He had weird chemistry with both of them for a sixth grader." 

I nodded, accepting the answer, and the crisis was averted. I was ready to have a full-on mental breakdown over it. In the morning, when my thoughts were clouded with weed, I would remember how Shinsou was the one to calm me down and feel incredibly weird about it. But right then, I was happy and content. 

Long time no update, sorry bout that. I had another dance comp and then randomly decided that I want to go back to school, so I've been busy and stressing. I hoping to get a few more chapters up today though.