dear vanessa,

i did it.

i did it, and i shouldn't have.

but i had to see you again.

if i'm never going to see you in person again, i wanted to see you in some other way. i want your pretty face etched into my brain so you can fill my dreams.

so i did it.

i doubt the manager would be thrilled with me, but i went into the back nonetheless and i dug out the file on the security cameras of the time you and i met.

and i watched our short interactions replay.

i watched you saunter around, ponytail bobbing with your bouncy, happy, energetic steps. i watched you pick out items with your eyebrows cutely raised. i watched your nose scrunch adorably as you realized what time it was, and that you had to get going before the store closed.

and i watched you walk up to my register, and give me that gorgeous smile.

vanessa, i hope you know how pretty you smile. i hope you know that it makes everyone look at you and just gush.

. . . i sat there for awhile, and just rewound that footage a few times. and then i packed up, tucked everything back where it originally was, and left at the end of my shift.

it's past one in the morning when i'm writing this. i'm too love-sick to sleep.

ha, well, anyway.

i hope you sleep well, wherever you are.

sincerely, jonathan