Lo amo Series 1

III.

"Ang gwapo mo, 'no?" Jessica, my seatmate said. Nakahalumbaba siya sa armrest niya habang nakatitig sa'kin. "Crush na crush talaga kitang hayup ka" Pagpapatuloy niya.

Ilang beses niya na bang nasabi sa'kin 'yan? I'm aware that she has a crush on me since she was very vocal with it, actually everyday niyang sinasabi sa akin. Happy crush lang naman daw kaya wala daw dapat akong ikabahala.

"Haaayy... Ang gwapo, sarap ipagdamot" She said in a playful manner.

Napailing na lang ako sa mga pinagsasabi niya. Dumating bigla 'yung prof namin kaya agad akong umayos ng upo, ganoon din si Jessica.

Our class was boring as usual, pero nabuhayan ako nang biglang magpa quiz 'yung prof na'min. Luckily, nakapag-aral ako kagabi kaya 'di ako masyadong nahirapan.

"Lunch na tayo?"

Tumango ako kay Jessica. Kukunin ko na sana ang baon ko pero mukhang naiwan ko ata sa bahay. Zico would always pack my lunch but unfortunately I forgot to brought it today kaya bibili na lang ako sa cafeteria.

"Tara na" I told Jessica.

She was talking nonstop while we're walking in the hallway, she was ranting about the quiz earlier.

"Ang lakas ng loob magpa quiz ng kalbong 'yun tas 'di naman nagtuturo!" She complained. "'Di na sana siya tubuan ng buhok sa ulo!"

I laughed because of her joke. "That's bad"

Andami niya pang sinabi habang naglalakad kami pero nagkasalubong ang kilay ko nang matanaw ko si Zico na nakasandal sa dulo ng concrete railing habang nagcecellphone. What is he doing here?

"Zico?" I called him. He immidiately turned his gaze towards me. Automatically, a smile was plastered on his face.

"Naiwan mo kanina" He handed me a paper bag. He went here just to gave me my lunch!? Ang layo ng department nila, ah!

I can feel Jessica's stare at Zico, she was like starstrucked, para siyang nakakita ng artista. I'm sure crush na ni Jessica si Zico mamaya, pustahan pa!

Kinuha ko agad ang paper bag. "T-thanks" I almost stutter because of the unexplainable nervousness that I felt. "Kumain ka na?" I asked.

"No, not yet" He said while slightly shaking his head.

"Oh, tamang-tama sumabay ka na sa'min" Walang hiyang tugon ni Jessica. Wew? Her transition was fast. Akala ko nahihiya kanina, eh, mukhang hindi pala.

"Uh... Actually, kailangan ko nang umalis" Nahihiyang sabi ni Zico. "Aalis na ako, ah?" Kumaway siya sa'kin bago tumakbo papaalis.

Sa pinakamalapit lang na cafeteria kami kumain ni Jessica, and as expected andami niyang tanong tungkol kay Zico. I wasn't able to answer most of her question since hindi ko pa naman gaanong kilala si Zico. Naalala ko tuloy na mag-iisang buwan na pala simula 'nung makilala ko siya.

"Reto mo'ko sa housemate mo" Utos niya sa'kin.

"Seriously, ilan ba ang crush mo?" Natatawang tanong ko sakanya. Napaisip naman siya. She mouthed some names while counting using her fingers.

It took her a while to answer. "Mga 11 lang naman" She giggled, mukhang kinikilig. "Mabuti na 'yung marami kang choices, 'no" She added before continuing to eat.

Jessica was really something. She's beautiful, I'm not gonna deny that, but she's not my cup of tea. Mas gusto ko 'yung feminine type of girl. Jessica was obviously loud so medyo hindi ko siya tipo.

Shortened time ngayon kaya maaga kaming na dismiss, may urgent meeting daw kasi ang faculty kaya 'yun maaga kaming pina-uwi. I was about to go home but I got a text from Zico.

From: Zico

Gala tayo? G?

I blinked twice. Gagala? Kami? It seems to be a good idea, so I immidiately replied.

To: Zico

G! Saan?

From: Zico

Basta, just for wait me at the main gate.

Na-excite tuloy ako habang naghihintay sakanya. I haven't roam around here, since I'm a little bit busy with school and adjusting as well. Hindi 'din ako pamilyar sa lugar na 'to kaya natatakot akong gumala mag-isa, mabuti na lang at nag-aya 'tong si Zico.

Almost 10 minutes akong naghintay bago siya dumating. Wala na siyang suot na polo, puting t-shirt, black slacks at black shoes na lang ang suot niya.

"Saan tayo pupunta?" I asked. I tried to contain my excitement but I just can't. Bumaba siya saglit sa motor niya at inabutan ako ng helmet.

"Basta," He ruffled my hair. Mas matangkad siya sa'kin kaya madali niyang nagawa iyon. "Tara na?"

I didn't ask anymore, maybe I'll just go with the flow.

He started driving in the highway near the school, hanggang sa naging masukal ang dinadaan namin. I could see a lot of trees and they're mostly coconut trees.

Zico suddenly drove slowly, so I assumed that we're getting near to where we're heading. I turned my gaze towards the other side of the road, and to my surprise I saw a beach. Hindi ko 'to nakita kanina kasi natatabunan siya ng mga halaman at puno. Mas lalo tuloy akong na-excite.

"We're here" Zico said after he stopped his motorcycle near the beach side.

Agad akong bumaba sa motor niya at hinubad ang helmet na suot ko. Gusto ko sanang tumakbo pero ayaw ko naman magmukhang ignorante kaya hinintay ko na lang si Zico na mauna.

He started walking towards the beach then he gestured me to follow him, so that's what I did.

Binuksan niya ang bag niya at may kinuha siyang kumot. Inilapag niya ito sa buhanginan, may kinuha 'din siyang junkfoods, drinks, may ulam at kanin pa! Kaya pala ang laki ng bag ni kupal.

"Wow, prepared!" I teased Zico, so he laughed and shook his head a bit.

"Wait lang, hihiram muna ako ng lamesa" He informed me.

Sinundan ko ng tingin si Zico habang tumatakbo siya papunta sa isang maliit na tindahan sa 'di kalayuan. May kinausap siya doon at pagbalik niya may dala na siyang maliit na lamesa at isang pahabang bangko.

He put the food at the small table, leaving a huge space on the blanket. I could sat on the small chair but I chose to sat on the blanket. Tumabi 'din si Zico sa 'kin.

Mabuti na lang at 'di na masyadong mainit dahil alas sais na ng hapon at palubog na 'din ang araw

"It's almost sunset" Zico stated the obvious.

We were quite while watching how the sun fall below the horizon. The bright sky gradually darkened and little by little, the stars and the moon started to appear in the sky.

"Ang ganda" I said, referring to the sky.

Ramdam ko ang titig sa'kin ni Zico pero hindi ko na lang ito pinansin. "Yeah, it's very satisfying to watch" He said in his low voice.

I gulped hard when I felt butterflies going crazy in my stomach. I unconsciously looked at him, nagtama ang mga mata namin kaya sabay kaming umiwas ng tingin. Damn, the atmosphere suddenly became so awkward!

He faked a cough. "Let's eat?" Basag niya sa mahabang katahimikan. 

Kabado akong tumayo at umupo sa harap ng lamesa, pero agad namang nawala iyon nang magsimula kaming kumain. Zico cooked fried chicken and hotdog for us.

I was actually amaze by how undeveloped the beach was. Kaunting tindahan, iilang lamp post, at mga puno lang ang makikita mo dito, may kaunting tao 'rin na naliligo. It was like a hidden paradise.

"Bakit ka sa SU (Sangfroid University) nag-aral?" Tanong ko kay Zico.

Kakatapos lang namin kumain at naka-upo na naman kami sa kumot na nilatag namin kanina. Nakatukod ang dalawang kamay ni Zico sa likod niya habang naka kruss ang dalawang binti. Yakap-yakap ko naman ang dalawang binti ko habang nakaupo, nilalamig nang kaunti.

"Gusto ko lang makalayo sa bahay" He scratched the tip of his nose a little bit. "That's the biggest reason why I chose SU"

"Why is that?" I asked again but this time I saw hint of pain in his eyes, so I thought that It wasn't a good question to ask. "No pressure. If you're not comfortable sharing it, then don't" I let out a nervous laugh.

Ngumiti siya nang tipid bago nagsalita. "My mom is a doctor and my dad owns a big real estate company here in the Philippines but they divorced when I was 10 years old and I was left with my mom," He shared while looking at the vast ocean. "My mom started to treat me badly after they divorced. Lahat ng galit niya kay papa sa akin niya binuntong. Still I tried to understand her kasi mama ko siya at mahal ko siya"

I didn't talk, just letting him share his experiences.

"Years after, my mom got married again. I thought It was going to be peaceful but my step dad always hit me and I couldn't do anything but to let him do that because I couldn't defend myself. Sinubukan ko namang sabihin kay mama pero ayaw niyang maniwala sa'kin, even my own mom can't protect me. Kaya sinabi ko talaga sa sarili ko na aalis talaga ako sa bahay na 'to pag nag college na ako" Nakatitig lang ako sa 'kanya habang sinasabi niya iyon. "Kaya eto, nakalayo na 'rin sawakas" He managed to say that casually but pain was really evident in his eyes.

Parehas pala kami ni Zico na gustong malayo sa bahay, iba nga lang ang rason. I want to be free so that I could learn how to depend on my self while Zico wants to be free because he was suffocated and hurt for a very long time. We have different reasons but we just want the same thing, and it is 'freedom'.

"You're so brave" Mahinang sabi ko habang nakatitig diretso sa mga mata niya.

"It's beacuse I need to, para sa sarili ko" He looked away again. "That's why as much as possible I don't want you to feel alone while we're living together because I know how hard it is to live in a house you can't even call a home" He gave me a reassuring smile.

My heart was pounding so hard after hearing that. Kaya pala ang bait niya sa'kin. He wants me to feel at home and I really appreciated it.

"Thank you" Tanging nasabi ko.

"This is getting dramatic" He laughed to lighten the atmosphere. "Uwi na tayo?"

Tumango ako at nagsimulang mag ligpit para maka-uwi kami agad.

Our month went so smooth. Medyo naging busy na kami pareho sa school pero kinakaya ko pa naman. Zico would always stay up late doing his plates, kaya minsan ako na ang nagluluto ng breakfast, simple breakfast meals lang naman kaya madali ko itong natutunan.

"Hindi ako uuwi mamaya. Susunduin ako ni mom sa school" I informed Zico while we're eating our breakfast.

Friday ngayon at dahil walang pasok bukas, mom wants me to spend my weekend with them kasi miss na 'daw nila ako.

"Okay, ingat kayo"

After our class I immidiately went outside the campus. Mom texted me earlier na nasa tapat na daw sila ng gate at ayaw ko naman siyang paghintayin ng matagal kaya nagmadali akong lumabas. Nakita ko naman agad ang kotse namin kaya dali-dali akong tumakbo at pumasok sa backseat.

"Zico!" Mom yelled when she saw me entering the car. She hugged my neck so tight. "I miss you so much"

"Ma, nasasakal ako" Pagrereklamo ko sakanya kaya agad naman siyang kumawala sa pagyakap sa leeg ko.

"Oh, right..." Umayos siya ng upo. "Tara na sa bahay, manong" She told our driver.

While on our way home, I told my mom about me renting a house with Zico instead of getting a dorm. Sinabi kong malapit lang siya sa school kaya okay na 'rin.

"What? Are you fine staying there?" Tanong niya kaya tumango ako. "Don't worry, I can buy that house for you"

"There's no need fo-"

"We can sell it naman after you graduate, so it's fine" She cut me off.

Hindi na ako pumalag pa kay mom dahil alam kong hindi ko siya mapipigilan. Mom buying that house means Zico and I no longer need to pay for the rent. Bills na lang ang kailangan naming bayaran!

Kinabukasan, maaga akong ginising ni Mom dahil dumating daw si Tita Cynthia kahapon galing canada. Nasa Tokyo si dad kaya kaming dalawa lang ni mom ang pupunta. We are going to meet Tita Cynthia in a mall so I wore a simple white sweater, maong jeans, and a white shoes.

We arrived in the mall at around 11:00 am, and since it's almost lunch time we immidiately went into a restaurant. Dito siguro namin kikitain si Tita Cynthia.

"Any reservations, ma'am?" The restaurant crew politely asked mom.

"Mrs. Veronica Aguilar"

The crew checked the reservation before talking again. "This way, ma'am" He said while gesturing us to follow him.

It was an elegant restaurant, something that mom would probably prefer. Kaunti lang ang mga tao sa loob at halatang mayayaman ang mga ito. The ambience of the restaurant was sophisticated and grand.

Dinala kami ng crew sa isang pang-apatang table. Umupo kami agad pero 'di kami nag order ng food dahil hinintay muna namin si tita.

"Cynthia!" Mom screeched loudly when she saw tita Cynthia approaching our table. She immidiately jumped out of her seat.

"Oh my god...Veronica!" Tita exclaimed in excitement, after that they hugged each other. 3 years daw silang 'di nagkita kaya ganun na lang sila ka excited na makita ang isat-isa.

Tumayo ako para batiin si tita pero nagtaka ako nang may makita akong babae sa likod niya. Who is she? Anak ba 'to ni tita?!

"Uhm...good afternoon po, tita" I politely greeted while smiling without showing my teeth.

I knew tita would say something like 'ang laki mo na' or 'ang liit mo pa noon', you know, the usual filipina tita words when they saw you after a very long time.

"Zico!" I almost got deaf beacuse of tita's high pitched voice. "Oh, you're so malaki na!" Bumeso siya sa 'kin.

Pagkatapos niyang bumeso sa 'kin ay agad niyang ipinakilala ang babaeng kasama niya. "This is Misty, my pamangkin"

"Hello po, Tita" Misty, tita's niece greeted mom. Bumeso naman agad si mom sakanya.

After the small reunion, we finally ordered our food. Tita and mom was talking about a lot of things I couldn't relate, so I and even Misty stayed quite, nagsasalita lang kami kapag tinatanong.

"Zico, Do you already have a girlfriend?" Tita suddenly asked out of nowhere.

Flashes of me having a girlfriend didn't register in my mind for an unexplainable reason, but suddenly I thought of a name.

Zico

I mentally shook my head because of that. Holy crap, what am I thingking?! There's no way I would fall inlove with him. Never akong nagkagusto sa lalake and I'm sure that I will not.

"Sa ngayon wala pa po"

"Perfect!" Tita screeched. My brow arched, still confused about tita's reaction. "Misty, doesn't also have a boyfriend" She meaningfully said.

Tita and mom giggled, lowkey shipping me with Misty. I looked at Misty and she was just there eating, as if it wasn't a big deal. How can she stay so casual after hearing that?

"I have no time for that, Tita" I said in between their giggles. "Busy sa studies"

'Dun lang napatingin sa 'kin si Misty. She looked at me like I've said something offensive towards her. Para siyang nabasted ng nililigawan niya. Oh well, woman and their fucking ego.

Ano bang ini-expect netong babaeng 'to? Kailangan ko bang sabayan sina Tita at landiin siya? Never in my fucking dream I would ever do that. There's something in Misty's aura that I don't like.

Ba't parang wala na akong matipuhang babae lately? Misty was beautiful but I just don't see myself clinging into her, malayong malayo sa dating ako. Before, I was easily attracted by a girls appearance, 'yung tipong umiikot agad ang ulo ko kapag may nakita akong maganda, pero ngayon parang nagbago na. Oo, maraming maganda sa school but the attraction that I usually felt before was gone. Magaganda pero parang hindi na ako na-aatract sa ganda lang, I was looking for something else already.

Something else.

Marami pang ginawa si mom at tita bago kami tuluyang umuwi. Dumiretso agad ako sa kwarto ko at nagbihis. I was removing my socks when my phone rang.

Kinuha ko agad ang phone at kumabog ang puso ko nang mabasa ang text na natanggap ko.

From Zico:

Kailan ka uuwi?

Fuck, how can a text made my heart flutter so bad?!