Oh okay i have been thinking to tell everyone something that well maybe brake my word of saying i'll be getting chapters up for my books i have up.... well it's all been put to a stop for i don't know how long, before i can write again, well i'll be writing but the chapters well not be going up because they are taking much, much slower then before... the reason behind that is that, i have been having nightmares a lot like every night, some have to do with my joy of the reason i write and then the love of my life..... this nightmares play over and over again, and she hasn't speaking to me for awhile now and it scares me, so this had put me under and i can't speak about it but i can say it hurts so much, i loved her with all my heart and the thought of her leaving me....it h-hurts so much and this nightmares of it, i can think of happy thoughts but this don't turn out the way i want to think..... i'm so upset with just sadness and fear, i trying to smile for my family and friends, but i know i'm not alright..... this is my big reason, and the worse part of it all i can't fall asleep until it's like around 5 AM, that's when this nightmares don't come.... but this i dream of nothing, it's getting harder to keep my words of when i say i'll be getting chapters up, and having one book on hold still, i just open my eyes to feel that something is coming and the reason she is far away from me, we haven't seen each other face to face like i mean we can't hug each other, but we both know what one and other look like just we can't hug well do anything....

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Then there is something big happening with the ship Evan and Delirious, I'm think of putting all my h2ovanoss books on hold for awhile because I don't want to hurt others and i know others are going to be upset, but I picture myself being in they shoes, so I want to take this break for Evan and Sydney, because I care about others feelings, I may not know them in real life, or have meet them but hearing from others tells me, that this is person is just cool, nice and kind, they are human too, and once more i'm going to take this break for Sydney and Evan for awhile and just hope Evan and Sydney are going to pull through this and be alright.

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Thank you all for listening to me and just hope i pull through as well, Jerome Out~