chapter 4: all I want (kodaline)

  Holly has always believed that everything happens for a reason. Not in the supernatural, fate-like way. God has a plan, a perfectly calculated, measured plan that determines the path of every human. She doesn't imagine what'll happen next week or next month, because she carves out her own destiny.

  She's her life's owner and she's paying her rent. She doesn't need a mom to help her set up the place or her dad to fix the pipes; because she has learned to handle all of those things on her own. She takes fate and holds him hostage in the bottom of her shoe; and she does just fine in the process.

  It's been that way since she was fourteen and that's the only thing that hasn't changed.

  When Matthieu, her handsome ex, grabs her arm and begs her to talk to him, she twists his arm to the point that if she takes it up a notch, she can break his arm. Holly isn't a wonderland, she is mad no matter what. And she absolutely loves it.

  "Excuse me?" says a boy, poking her shoulder.

  She abruptly turns, prepared to cuss off Matt again. Holly lets out a breath when she recognizes Walter, looking at her with wide eyes. He is supporting his weight on crutches, but he looks stronger than she's seen him in a while. He is wearing thick glasses that form a light shadow on his face; his battered body flashes back to memory and she flinches.

  "Were you by any chance present behind school last Monday?" he asks. His voice is deep and laced with morbid curiosity. His eyes are dark brown, similar to tree bark. They almost pull her in and she blinks.

  She almost reaches to tug on a loose strand of her hair, but figures that doing so might let him find out. She doesn't need him in her life.

  "No," she says.

  His face falls. "Are you sure?"

 "Of course, I'm sure. Are you implying that I'm a liar, Jones?" A corner of her lip rises noticeably, she's challenging to say otherwise. The last time they talked was on the first day of school, she asked to borrow a pencil.

 "No. Sorry." He turns and starts walking away, the sound of his crutches scratching the ground.