chapter 10: ghosts

    Holly has only had one bully in her life. They share the same eyes and lips; the blonde hair that haunts Holly so much that she started dying it at 10. Her bully gave birth to her, but Holly could never owe her anything.

     She always wonders if one day, she'll be a mother as well. The idea itself terrifies her, but there is another that makes it all okay. She can get a chance to take care of her kid, fix her own mother's mistakes. She can pour so much love into her child that they could drown in it. Until then, she will learn to be her own mother, her own sister, her own best friend. Until she decides to be less alone, she will savor every second of it.

    But Walt doesn't make being with someone so bad. He makes her laugh, more than any of her previous partners ever could. His sense of humor is dry, but the simple fact that he doesn't understand how funny he is causes her heart to swell with this...type of content. Like when her dad cooked for her or took care of her when she was sick. It is indescribable.

    Walt makes her smile. That is enough for her to stay wary of him, because she falls in love with the beholder of her happiness too easily. She will hold on and refuse to let go. So, she vowed to put herself and her brother before anyone else, especially Walt.

    Loud rap blasts in her ears as she plans out Walt's plan. She needs to figure out every step to making his bullies fear him, to make that horrible, goddamned girl Ana like him. Her pen is running out of ink, and she keeps blowing hot air on it in hopes of having enough to write.

    "Holly?" cries out a woman, "are you home?"

    Holly closes the notebook and covers the pen, she grabs them in her hand and steps down from her mattress. She walks out to greet her aunt, careful not to step over the crooked wood plank on the floor.

    "Hey, Mer." She grabs her aunt's bag and closes the door behind her.

    "Is the fridge empty?" Meredith Carter asks, limping to the small apparel. She untangles her sea of blonde curls and puts them back into a tight pony tail over her head.

     "There's milk, toast and yogurt. The lady upstairs is generous as hell with her money," says Holly, even though she knows that she could only afford the dairy products. She stuffed the toast package into her backpack and expertly went through. "Rough day?"

     Meredith pours half a plastic cup with milk, sits and practically sinks into the couch next to Holly and murmurs: "You have no fucking idea. I spent the whole day cleaning the bathroom, because apparently I stink at making coffee. This jackass complained to my boss that my coffee was sour, but that's just because I rejected him."

     "At least the milk tastes good. It's chocolate, you know," Holly says. She continues in her notebook, pausing to glance at Meredith from time to time. She is reminded of how young Meredith is; of how much she is strong. Letting a rich boyfriend go, because at 23, he didn't want to take care of her brother's orphan kids, was the hardest thing she ever had to do.

    "Thanks, kid. Whatcha scribbling in there?"

    "Nothing much. I'm helping this nerdy guy be better. He gets bullied all the time."

    "Ah. What's the plan?"

    Holly holds up the notebook and reads out loud, "First, I'm helping him look the part. It'll cost him around 110$ to get the perfect look, but I can round it up to around 50, if Liv doesn't slam the door in my face."

    "Liv—you dated for a month last year, right? Doesn't she hate you?"

    "No. Yes. But I'll take care of it. Then, I'll teach him to play the part. What to say, what not to say. That'll be a solid seven hours, maybe eight if he acts like a dick."

    "Is he?"

    "What, a dick?"

    Meredith nods.

    "No," Holly shakes her head. "A little, but it's okay. We're all a little bit of assholes."

    Meredith laughs, "You're right. When's Ed coming home?"

    "I dunno. Last night he came in at four. I almost killed him."

    "I heard you. The whole building did."

     "I'm worried about him."

    "You always are," says Meredith. "Catch a break from all this boy stuff, Quinn from 5B's laptop crashed. I'm going to sleep."

     Holly stands up, "I'll be there. I'm going out anyway. Be home at one. Call me when Ed comes home." She stuffs the pen and notebook into her pillow case, grabs a wad of cash from the bump under her mattress and heads out.

-

     Three knocks are made before the door opens just enough to show a figure. A disturbed Walter stands there, in a pair of sweatpants and a Star Wars shirt. A pencil is tucked in between his ear and head, his glasses are crooked.

    "Holland?" he says, "what? Why are you here? How the fudge did you know where I live?"

    "Fuck," answers Holly. "It's fuck. Say it."

     He scratches his nose, "I have a little sister. It's fudge. Why are you here? It's nine thirty on a Wednesday."

    "Exactly. It's nine thirty on a Wednesday. Why are you in pajamas?"

    "Holland. This is not the time for your little shenanigans. We have a math test tomorrow, I need to study."

    She can't help but be amused at his awkward feet shuffling. "It would take an average kid three hours to be prepared for this test. You, however, have gotten straight A's since kindergarten. Knowing you, you've already gotten in three hours and more. Therefore, you're ready for the test. Get dressed. We're going out."

    "No."

    "You wanna have fun?"

    "I don't want to get arrested."

    "Walty, I promise you won't get on handcuffs. Although, they're quite fun. Go get dressed."

    His eyes glint at her. "If I say no, will you leave?"

    "Of course not, Walt. Do you even know me at all?"

    "That's the thing, I don't. But I'll go ask my parents. I doubt they'll say yes."

    Thirty seconds later, he comes back with a long face. "They said yes. My mother wants to meet you."

     Thirty minutes later, Mrs. Jones can barely let Holly go. She has blabbed non-stop about her son and drilled her about what their status was. Holly almost wanted to tell her that they were together, just to get the look on her face, but kept it as "we're just friends, Ma'am."

    Walt unlocks his car and opens the front seat's door. Holly swoops in and sits down, grins at him, says: "Thanks for the gentlemanly gesture. Now go sit."

    "My car, Holland."

    "My hands on the wheel. My knowledge getting you to the no-bullying zone. Get in."

    He grumbles under his breath and obliges. Holly observes his outfit and grimaces, "Take off the sweater. Fold up your sleeves. I told you no plaid, didn't I?"

    "It's cold outside," he protests, but does as asked. Holly grabs the sweater and pulls it over her shirt, it reaches her thighs.

    She gives him a smile and starts the car, "I know. But it's a win-win situation. You look less like someone who lets his mom lay out his clothes, and I get warm."

    "Where are we going?"

    "Somewhere."

    "That's not enough, Holland."

    "Stop with the full name, for fuck's sake. I'm taking you a place where you'll get your first real lesson, alright?"

    "Fine."

    What Holly loves, most of all, is his reluctant acceptance to her ideas.