28. Juni 2021

You're my favourite „What if...? ".

And my strictest „never gonna happen ".

You're a hurricane of feelings.

And you make me think.

You make me write.

And stop for a second.

And think about all the „What if...? s

But I'm glad it didn't happen.

I'm glad I'm where I am now.

Thanks to you.

Thanks to my broken heart.

And I really love talking to you. Still.

Because how could I forget your jokes and our talks?

We were in sync. From the very beginning.

And I loved it.

Still love it a bit.

Still love you a bit. In a twisted way.

Probably for a long time. Like forever.

But I owe ist to myself to be strict.

You get to be a „never gonna happen ".

You broke my heart, my trust, me.

It was for the best.

I know that now.

But it won't be happening again.

You will never gain my trust or all of my love again.

My heart belongs somewhere else.

And I'm happy.

So freakin happy.

And so tired of the What ifs popping up in my brain so randomly.

I will never shut you out completely.

But you will always just get little parts of me.

Because it is not going to happen. Never.

Not letting you in again.

Fuck the what ifs.

Even the favourite ones cannot be changed.

(And that's more than alright)