Chapter 7 ― Dream of a Kiss

I wish I could fully enjoy Alex’s state, but I can’t. I mean, she is next to me the whole day, hugging me, being all cute and adorable and I swear I have my heart beating like crazy the whole time. I kind of take advantage of the situation and I keep her close to me all the time, giving her kisses on her temple, stroking her hair and things like those. But I also hate she is like this because I know she is in pain. Kind of. I know she’s under the effect of many pills and she is not in actually pain, but I know this effect will fade eventually and she’ll suffer and I hate that.

Periods and all those things are something too weird for me and I never thought of them so much in my life. I try not to do it now, I just focus on Alex’s pain and I hate it. I’m so grateful I’m a guy so I don’t have to go through that.

I notice that during the day Zayn watches us and the way he looks is only a confirmation that he also fancies Alex. It’s so obvious and that really scares me. That’s why when I catch Zayn staring at us, I hug Alex tighter, as if like that I can’t stop Zayn from, in a way, stealing her from me.

And the worst part is that Alex and I are not together so I can’t exactly lose her and Zayn can’t steal her from me… but still. In my head it makes sense.

Our tour bus this time is bigger because the girls are coming with us here, so it has four sets of bunks and I’m kind of sorry they’ll have to cope with us for over a month. We’re messy, we’re annoying… we’re five boys who can be really loud and random. I hope they don’t end up killing us.

After we watch a movie Liam reminds us we have to go to bed. We’ll arrive early to our first destination so we need to get some rest. I kind of dread the end of the day because Alex said: Niall’s day. She didn’t say Niall’s week or Niall’s month, so I’m not sure what’s gonna happen next.

I’m about to go to my bunk when she stops me. She looks so nervous and her cheeks are burning bright. “I just… I was wondering… May I sleep with you tonight? I don’t wanna sleep alone,” she says in a whisper and I know she has to fight really hard to say those words. “I don’t snore nor kick whilst sleeping.” I smile as I step closer, loving how adorable and funny she can be. “At night it hurts the most and I don’t like to be alone when that happens,” she confesses and it breaks my heart that she has to go through this.

“Of course you may, love,” I answer, so glad she’s asked me this.

She smiles brightly at me and I feel my heart skipping a beat, as it’s normal every time I lock eyes with Alex. We wait for everyone to fall asleep before going to bed so no one will bother us. Once we’re in my bunk I wrap my arms around her body and bring her close, trying to breathe as evenly as I can. She feels so right in my arms, next to me that it’s ridiculous. It makes me feel so happy and content.

I feel so great with Alex in my arms that I fall asleep without noticing it. One moment I’m awake, the next I’m sleeping. And I know I’m sleeping because I dream of being with my eyes closed, still holding Alex. But she turns in my arms and stares at me. I have my eyes closed, but I know she is staring at me. I don’t know what’s going through her mind, but she leans in and pecks my lips. A soft touch that last a few seconds only, but her taste lingers in my lips even when she pulls away.

And then she leaves me alone in the bed and the funny thing is that when I wake up I swear I still feel Alex’s lips on mine. That dream was so realistic. And the fact that she is not next to me when I wake up makes me wonder if I dreamt of it at all.

When I leave my bed I notice everyone is around the breakfast table and they are murmuring. When I get there I see them observing Alex who’s sound asleep on the booth.

“Did she sleep here all night?” Belle asks when I stop next to her.

“I don’t understand. When I fell asleep she was with me–” I blurt out realising too late that I’ve confessed she went to bed with me last night.

“Pardon me?” Zayn says, his voice sharp.

“Hey, look; it’s the book I recommended her. Maybe she was reading it and fell asleep,” Phebs intervenes, probably feeling the tension between Zayn and I.

“I don’t think so. Here’s her bookmark, and clearly isn’t in the middle of the book,” Belle points out then.

“That’s because I finished the book last night,” Alex replies but her voice sounds strangled and then she curls in foetal position. “Some help?” Alex whispers and I know she is in pain, so I hurry to her side, shielding her in my arms.

“Do you need your pills, love?” I hate that she is in so much pain, I can tell by the way she holds on to me with all her strength. “Shh, Belle is coming with them,” I promise her, kissing her forehead, wanting Belle to come faster with the pills.

Alex looks up but this time she doesn’t meet my eyes, she meets Zayn’s. “Would you stay with me today?” She asks and I tense up. No, not Zayn. “I want you to be my teddy bear today. Today will be Zayn’s day!” She tries to sound happy but I know she is not. She hasn’t had her pills yet! “And tomorrow will be Harry’s day!” She adds and I relax a bit… she is just staying with each of us one day.

“Why’s Harry first?” Louis asks indignant. “I’m your husband and you always prefer others over me. Not fair.”

“Because Eleanor will come tomorrow, right? Would you rather stay with me that going out with your girlfriend?” She retorts.

“Good point. Tomorrow will be Harry’s day, then!” Louis states which made Alex giggle but she still groans in pain, until Belle arrives with her pills.

She stays with me a little while, but then I feel how she only wants to get away. She goes with Zayn and I hate how jealous I am. I’m honestly afraid of Alex and Zayn spending the day together, getting even closer when I feel Alex has changed with me. There’s something odd with her this morning, a wall between us that it wasn’t here before.

Did I do something stupid while we were sleeping? Is that why she left my side in the middle of the night?

I try to think that I’m just being paranoid and things are okay, but I’m still afraid. By the time we’ve done settling down in our rooms and we’re together, I’m still trying to figure out what I did wrong.

 “Okay, we have the whole morning for ourselves, in the afternoon they need us in the arena for sound-check and other stuff. What are you going to do?” Liam asks in general.

“We want to go sightseeing,” Belle replies taking Liam and Phebs’ hands. Harry joins them.

“I rather stay here. I don’t feel like moving and I’m kind of dangerous when I’m high like this,” Alex replies.

“Then I’ll stay with you,” Zayn adds and I swear I feel all my muscles tensing. I don’t want them to spend the day together!

“I’ll go with the lads, then”, I say but I don’t really wanna go out, but I don’t know what to say to stay here and watch Zayn doesn’t make a move on Alex. “And what are you going to do while we’re out?” I ask and this time she meets my eyes.

“I dunno. Watch a movie or Zayn can help me remember all the names of the Gold Saints to name my future twelve cats!” She says and I chuckle remembering our conversation. Zayn looks confused which makes me smile wider, because I have an inside joke with her and he is not part of it. Yes, very mature, I know. “The thing is I’m gonna adopt twelve cats, one per month and I’m gonna name them after the twelve Gold Saints of The Knights of Zodiac,” she explains cheerfully and I lost my mind. Not so inside joke anymore. “As I can’t be a nun ‘cos I don’t understand how all them can marry the same guy, I’ll die surrounded by cats! I’m gonna adopt the first in August an he will be Aioria! Like the Gold Saint of Leo!” By this point she is actually rambling.

Nevertheless, she is so cute when she rambles and I can’t help myself. “You’re so weird,” I say.

“And you’re just noticing now?” She jokes. “I thought you were cleverer, Niall.” I blush although I know she is just teasing me. “But don’t worry, by when I’m done with you all, none of you will be safe. You will know everything about the anime shows I watched as I child. You’ll see,” she states and I’m not sure if that’s good or bad, but she sounds determined.

After that we leave the hotel, Zayn and Alex stay behind and although we do have fun, I can’t stop thinking of them, wondering what they may be doing. Our outing is not as pleasing as it could have been because I am just too jealous.

I just hope Zayn doesn’t try anything.

-:-:-:-

I love jealous Niall <3 I can't help it. And well, know you know what happened back then in Backfire. He felt the kiss, after all.

Dedication to @AdelineMuffin.

Bel, xx