Tucked away in the corner of our small section of the schoolyard, our little group sits on the same bench, in the same seats, having the same conversation about chores we have every day and have done for the last eight years.

I can summarise our conversation in one sentence; we do the same chores and we hate them the same amount.

Axel sits on my one side and Suki on the other. Opposite us are Seb, Brielle and Hope. Everyone has strategically positioned themselves on the bench with an arms width between each of us so there's no risk of touch or an accidental brush of body parts. Around us are a few more benches of Naturalists, all significantly younger than us but no less conscious and aware of their personal space.

Several teachers form a border across the yard and on the other side of them, Techies are crammed together; arms slung over shoulders and bodies intertwined. They cover the benches like mould so I'm not sure where one Techie begins and the other starts. I don't envy them. It must be overly stimulating, with too many expectations of having to be comfortable with hand slapping, headlocks, kisses on cheeks and teenage body odours wafting up your noise as they get too close. Looking at them makes me appreciate my bubble of space surrounding me at all times.

Being a Naturalist isn't all bad if I get to avoid all of that.

My gaze continues until it rests on Zach who is staring right at me. He winks and flashes me that annoying smirk again. I roll my eyes which makes that stupid smirk grow even wider.

'Do you know him?' Axel asks quietly.

Snapping my attention away from Zach, I focus on Axel. I shrug, noncommittally. I don't want to lie to Axel, but I also don't want his opinion or his disapproval.

I'm not Suki.

Axel's eyes briefly flick towards Zach. 'Techies are always trying to get a laugh at our expense,' Axel says resentfully, and his face darkens with an expression I've never seen him display before.

'Ignore it. Suki mentioned you and Brielle are working on a new song. How's it going?' I say, leaning towards him slightly. It's a tiny movement but enough to get his attention and for him to visibly relax.

'Really good. Why didn't you come down to The Rec yesterday to hear us practise?' He asks smiling.

Because I was too busy washing my ears out after using a Techie's headphone. 'I hung out with my parents then went to see Alma and lost track of time, but I'll come watch you this Sunday.'

Maybe the band's new song will help lessen the impact of the song I listened to yesterday. A song I have fallen in love with; the melody and words of which are now stuck in my thoughts on a beautiful continuous loop.

Sleeplessly embracing... Hunger of the pine... I'm a female rebel...

Last year, I read a book about a girl who became addicted to drugs. I never understood how someone could be so desperate for something they'd do horrible things. I'm starting to now. The desperate need to listen to that song again so it helps me escape reality is overwhelming.

Is this the start of my downward spiral? Soon I'll be begging my music dealer Zach for just one more listen, willing to sell my own parents for another song.

I'm not that bad. Not yet. I can fight this. I can resist Zach's music temptation.

'I've missed you the last couple of Sundays,' Axel says, interrupting my idiotic thoughts.

'I'm sure the others have kept you entertained.'

'Yeah, but it's not the same without you.' Axel looks at me and holds my gaze.

It's always the same. I smile because it's nice of him to make me feel wanted but it is always the same when we hang out at The Rec. No matter who's there the activities and conversation are unchanged, almost identical. My absence wouldn't make any difference.

The first bell sounds, and every Naturalist carefully and slowly stands and moves away from the benches. We have ten minutes until the next bell, the one for the Techies. We always leave slightly earlier, arrive at school earlier. It's one of the many ways the school ensure the Techies don't touch us, accidentally or deliberately, extra precautions just to be safe.

Always safe.