The football fields were empty and would continue to be until lunch, at least. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, it was a perfect day to be outside...and yet I felt more like locking myself into a darkened room and crying. I made my way to the furthest corner of the field, dropping my bag I sat down on the concrete, my back facing the stands. The football fields were mostly used at lunch if people wanted to practice or come to chill out.

I stretched my legs out in front of me, kind of wishing I hadn't worn shots because it was rather cold out here and pushed my hair back off my shoulders as my eyes closed and the pounding in my head started to lessen. The nonstop whispering had been doing my head in, so had the staring and the stupid, idiotic notes. What is wrong with people? Why can't they keep their ignorant thoughts to themselves instead of spreading the hate? I hadn't done anything to any of them; in fact, most of them hadn't a clue who I was before this, so why take an interest now?

"Stupid sheep!"

"Who's a stupid sheep?"

My eyes snapped open only to land of the last person I wanted to see right now. "No one. Just thinking out loud, that's all." Lucas nodded but he didn't move. He just stayed there, hands pushed deep in his pockets, looking lost. "Did you want something? Or were you just hear to call me names as well?"

"What—Riles, I'd never do that!" His face had fallen and he looked visibly upset at the thought.

I sighed. "I know. I'm sorry, Lucas. I've just had a bad day already and it's not even lunch yet. I didn't mean to take it out on you."

"It's okay. Do you...um...do you want to talk about it?" I raised an eyebrow at him. He just shrugged in return so I gestured the spot beside me and he sat down.

There was silence then. Neither of us knew how to start. It wasn't every day you had a conversation about girls with your ex-boyfriend. At least, I didn't.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted earlier." I looked over at him, but just he kept staring straight ahead. "It was just...I don't know, a shock, I guess. It's not every day you see your ex-girlfriend kissing another girl. Especially around here."

"I know. And I'm sorry too. I honestly didn't plan it. It just kind of...happened."

"So are you—I mean, people are talking about it but most of what they say is crap anyway. But I was wondering if—"

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"It's true."

"So are you a—uhmm you know?"

"Yep. As queer as three dollar bill."

"Okay. Umm...okay..."

"Lucas....?"

"Yeah, Riles?"

"It's not your fault, you know?"

"Really? Oh thank you!" I whipped around to glare at him. "No—I mean, just that...I thought...uh..."

I sighed. "Don't worry. I guess I've kind of always known. It just took me a while to really understand and accept it."

He nodded thoughtfully. "So you and Smackle, huh?" He grinned, but it faded the second he looked at me. "Riles? Oh, Riles, I'm sorry! Please don't cry."

I couldn't help it. I didn't want to, especially not in front of Lucas! He was already weirded out enough by the whole situation; he didn't need me sobbing my heart out as well. But there was something so familiar, so comforting about having him here with me. It was easy, simple, I didn't need to try with Lucas and it's what drew me to him at first, it's what made him such a great friend. I could talk to him and I needed that right now, more than anything.

He pulled me into a hug, letting me cry into his shoulder without a second thought. "It's okay, Riles. Come on, it's going to be okay, I promise!" I felt myself nod as he rubbed my back. "Whatever it is, I'm going to be here for you, alright? I swear you can count on me!" His words only made me cry harder.

"You sure you're okay now?"

"Yeah, thanks, I just needed to get it out of my system." We were still on the field only now I'd managed to regain control of myself and stop the hysterical crying. "Thanks for staying with me, Lucas. Most guys would have bolted by now!"

He laughed, nodding, probably thinking of Billy who went and hid in the boys' bathroom the first time Sarah cried in front of him. "It's cool, Riles. You're my—my friend. And that's what friends do for each other...right?"

"Right....you sure we're friends, Lucas? I know you still have feelings—"

"No, I mean, yeah, we're friends and yeah, I still have feelings...but that's my problem. And I'm not going to let that get in the way of our friendship. Even if we aren't dating anymore, you're still important to me, Riles. So...so I'm going to try my hardest to be here for you whenever you need me. It might take a little while to be completely cool with all...all things...but you'll just have to be patient with me too."

"Lucas, I...I don't know what to do..." I hugged him. I really didn't know what to say, so a hug would have to do for now. "Thank you." When we broke apart he stayed staring at me. "What?"

"You going to tell me what's going on then? Or do I have to guess?"

I found that when I started talking, I couldn't stop. I ended up telling him everything. I hadn't realized how much I managed to pack into this last week! It had all sort of taken hold of me and dragged me along. Of course, I didn't go into detail about the numerous make out sessions I'd had with Maya, he didn't need to know any of that to get the general gist of the story.

"Wow, Riles, that—that's quite a week you had. No wonder you're confused."

I nodded. "I don't know what to do about Maya. I love her, and I know she loves me, but I don't want her getting hurt by all the talk and the stupid sheep with the stupid notes!" I pulled the notes out of my bag and let him look through them. He was silent as he read. I kept expecting him to laugh or suddenly turn on me, agreeing with that the notes said. But he didn't. He just sat there and took in all in.

When he'd finished reading he turned to me. "Riles..." He looked down at the pieces of paper in his lap and back up at me. Then, without another word, he started ripping them up, one by one.

"Lucas? What are you doing?"

"That's what I think of those people. That's what I think about all those idiots at this school!" He threw the shredded bits of paper in the air and we watched as they were caught in the wind and carried off the field. "You want to know what I think, Riles." I nodded warily. "I think you need to show people that you don't care what they say about you, because you're better than all of them and you always will be. Want to know why?" He climbed to his feet and offered me his hand. "Because you know exactly who you are and you aren't afraid to show it." He grinned down at me.

"You know what, Lucas? You're right," I grabbed his hand and let him pull me up. "I don't care what they think. Come on, it's time to show them!" I slung my bag over my shoulder and, with Lucas at my side, I strode back into school, head held high.