I really don't understand why I can't talk before. I couldn't understand what's really happened to me. Until one day, I just realized why my Mother and father took extra care for me.

I hated them for overreacting, over protective, ni wala nga akong nakuhang kaibigan maliban na lang kay Rizzi, iyong anak ni Tito Rocky at Tita Zera.  She's my cousin at masyado lang talagang bibo si Rizzi kaya napalapit ako sa kanya.

Hindi kasi masaya ang buhay ko mula ng maka-recover ako sa trauma. It took me eight years bago ko naalala ang lahat. 

Zui's.. Chong Hin Zui.. That dirty old man!

I was abused..

I was forced..

I was raped..

Naiinis pa ako noon kay Dad dahil halos ayaw niya akong palapitin sa mga lalaki. Hindi ko rin naranasang pumasok sa eskwelahang pinapasukan ni Fuerte dahil naka home study lang ako. Napaka-ingat ni Daddy sa akin. 

Naiinis ako noon pero mas naiinis ako ngayon. Parang hindi ko na kayang harapin ang sarili ko sa salamin. I'm scared that I might see a pictures of me, being tied up, hit and forced. Para akong babagsak, para akong mababaliw. 

How can I face other people now, if I couldn't even faced myself.

It's painful..

Really painful..

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